What Am I

Of all the different psychedelics you could use, mushrooms would be much more on the benign end, as you've already noticed. LSD would fall a few notches closer to being harmful imo. It's a lot more stimulating, which can leave you feeling strung out and depleted. This would no doubt take a toll over time. The topic was covered pretty extensively in the thread linked below, in case you haven't seen it.

Wild stuff indeed. I wonder how long it'd take to dissolve all that karma, and I wonder what'd happen then? It appears to be some kind of endless game.

If you read the possibilities you listed, they actually line up pretty well with the Tibetan Book of the Dead. I do take your point though. It'd be foolish to cling on to any of this, thereby creating a type of limited view from an imperfect source. The transcendent experience itself would be an infinitely better guide. It's a good reminder to not concentrate on the finger. The First Stage: The Clear Light immediately after death, the individual’s consciousness is said to experience a brief period of clarity and awareness, known as the “clear light.” This is considered a crucial moment, as it is believed that one can achieve liberation from the cycle of rebirth if they recognize and cultivate this clear light. The Second Stage: The Bardo After the clear light, the individual’s consciousness enters a state known as the “bardo,” or intermediate state. During this period, the individual is said to experience a series of visions and emotions, which are believed to be influenced by their past karma. The bardo is a critical period, as it is thought that one’s future rebirth is determined during this time. The Third Stage: Rebirth After the bardo, the individual’s consciousness is reborn into a new body, either human or non-human, depending on their karma. The Tibetan Book of the Dead provides guidance on how to navigate this process and achieve a positive rebirth.

Right, it's definitely incomprehensible lol. Such a mindfuck. Though after everything I've experienced, I have faith that they're pointing to a literal phenomenon, even if it's beyond me for the moment. Like a moth to the flame, I keep aiming in that direction.

I'm not sure as I've never taken it, but it's theorized that it converts to 4-HO-DMT (psilocin) when taken orally. I've heard various reports from different people that it's identical to mushrooms, slightly different, and completely different. So I don't really know what to expect. Everyone does seem to agree that it's awesome though.

I didn't see the clip in question, but I wonder if he was talking about the opportunity for enlightenment afforded to everyone at the time of physical death. It's described in the Tibetan Book of the Dead. Here's a quick summary: The First Stage: The Clear Light immediately after death, the individual’s consciousness is said to experience a brief period of clarity and awareness, known as the “clear light.” This is considered a crucial moment, as it is believed that one can achieve liberation from the cycle of rebirth if they recognize and cultivate this clear light. The Second Stage: The Bardo After the clear light, the individual’s consciousness enters a state known as the “bardo,” or intermediate state. During this period, the individual is said to experience a series of visions and emotions, which are believed to be influenced by their past karma. The bardo is a critical period, as it is thought that one’s future rebirth is determined during this time. The Third Stage: Rebirth After the bardo, the individual’s consciousness is reborn into a new body, either human or non-human, depending on their karma. The Tibetan Book of the Dead provides guidance on how to navigate this process and achieve a positive rebirth.

Maybe, depending on where you live. It's in a gray area of legality in most of the world. If you live in Canada, you can pick it up pretty easily domestically. I've heard it's been sold at head shops under the title "synthetic shrooms". You can also buy it online from research chemical vendors. I was laughing because it's not the kind of thing you'll find at your local CVS pharmacy or anything like that. At least not yet I guess.

No problem Sorry to hear that. Though don't worry, because it is the case that you've already smuggled 5-MeO-DMT into the country via your body since it's endogenous. If someone were to naturally induce the right states of consciousness, it's my strong belief that they'd end up at the same destination. And better yet, they'd learn how to do it at will. With Adyashanti for example, unless he's leaving out major details of his story, it's not like he ingested 5meo to get there. And his description matches my experience with the psychedelic perfectly. This is an area where I'm not sure if many on the forum agree with me. The power of 5meo to make a lasting change relates to its ability to excite the human subtle energetic anatomy, not its acute chemical effect. It's these energetic organs that actually ground and sustain the higher experience in the human form. Similar to how a properly functioning eye can see in detailed and colorful 20/20 vision. The further your conscious awareness dips into its subtle and causal realms, the more energy is released. This ultimately leads to an explosion of energy called kundalini, which is a powerful built-in activator for all kinds of higher human functions. Since you live in India and you've been into this stuff for a while, I'm guessing you're already familiar with a lot of I'm describing. I'm just expressing it for the sake of being detailed. So a simple way to think about 5meo use is that it forces you into a very deep and powerful state of meditation. It'd essentially be nirvikalpa samadhi if you push it far enough. If someone were to naturally meditate to that level, they'd have the same energetic release, which would lead to the same changes in their perception. Like I mentioned in a post above in this thread, the effects of a powerful trip can last for a week or two. This would be the result of the influx of energy induced in the single experience. If you have a proper spiritual practice outside of occasional 5meo use, you can ground this new perception and make it last much longer. For example, I've had periods where I've gone a few months between 5meo uses, and I'd still get flashes of experiential non-duality due to my daily attention on practice. So barring the sustainment of these types of changes, the experience will reduce to a mere memory. I'm pretty sure that's the more common result for most 5meo users. Here's a badass video to help hype it up lol:

I couldn't say what Leo experiences, as it sounds like it may be a bit different (potentially deeper?), but many of us have a more classical awakening experience when using something like 5-MeO-DMT. The excerpt below (from Adyashanti's book "Emptiness Dancing") highlights the shift in identity and the gathering of awareness into the moment to such an extreme degree, it's as if every action has 100% novelty. This description would represent an experiential understanding that can only be properly grasped during the experience itself. You're left with only a shadow of it afterwards. These two experiences happened together, one following within a few moments of the other. In the first, I became the Oneness of everything, and in the second, I became the consciousness or spirit that totally woke up out of all identification, even out of Oneness. When the Oneness dropped away, there was still a basic awakeness, but it had two different aspects: I’m everything, and I’m absolutely nothing. This was the awakening, the realization of Self. The next thing that happened was that I took a step, just an ordinary step. It felt like the way a baby does when it takes his first good step and then smiles and looks around as if to say, “Did you see that?” and you can see his joy. So I took a step, and it was like, “Wow! The first step!” and another step, and then another, and I kept moving in circles because every step was the first step. It was a miracle. In each “first” step, formless consciousness and Oneness just merged together so that the awakeness that had always identified itself' as form was now actually inside of the form, unidentified. It wasn’t looking through any thoughts or memories of what had come before, just through the five senses. With no history or memory, every step felt like a first step.

Since you mentioned the retreat, I guess this is a good place to post a recent video that includes a few people associated with it.

@Ryan M if you get a hold of some 5meo and use a large enough dose, you'll very likely experience an authentic state of awakening. And just like you're guessing, it can be profoundly disturbing for your ego to be mostly replaced by oneness, especially at first. That disturbance can last for a week or two after a really powerful trip, but the tail of effects eventually dissipates, and then you're left with just the intellectual understanding of your oneness instead of the actual raw experience of it, which is a million times easier to cope with. So unless you're really unique for some reason, I wouldn't worry as much about it ruining your life. It's during the event itself and a couple weeks after where you can assume shit will be intense. If you want the psychedelic awakening process to be easier, you should pursue a consistent spiritual practice and then integrate 5meo use into it.

To clarify my process, all 5mL would go in a single sterile and airtight vial. It'd be the type of vial with resealable rubber on top which can be punctured by a needle to draw out the desired dose. It can be stored in a cool dark place and doesn't necessarily need to be in the fridge.

Wow, is this right? I don't have experience with scoops myself, so I guess I underestimated their ability to be precise. In my mind, I imagined there being a 1-3mg variance in each scoop-full, which would add up to a considerable inaccuracy when using multiple scoops to reach the desired weight. If they really are this precise, I guess I revise my opinion on their worth when creating a vial of psychedelics. I won't be switching because I'm set in my ways with a process that works, but I can see the value.

After all this, it's pretty obvious that talking about siddhis or anything besides just meditating/tripping into higher states of consciousness is a fruitless activity on this forum. It'll go around in circles worse than other topics, because it'll just be the blind leading the blind. We should do what spiritual teachers have suggested throughout time (including Leo), and ignore these things while focusing our aims towards higher consciousness, which we can at least all agree actually exists.

I haven't looked deeper into it than a few secondhand reports, so you could be right. Like I mentioned though, as long as it's not insanely inaccurate, it'd work for our purposes where volumetric dosing is concerned.

Nice, thank you. It's my hope that the right people will come across it at the right time.

Yes, exactly. A scoop makes perfect sense in terms of convenience when you have more leeway for error, but SubQ for malt can produce a breakthrough with less than 10mg. It really would be better to aim for precision if you're going to go so far as injection. It's one of the nice perks of the ROA. I personally create sterile vials for most substances at a minimum of 500mg/5mL. Where volumetric dosing is concerned, that means even if my initial measurement was slightly off and I somehow accidentally mixed 520mg into 5mL, then 5 units on a syringe would be 5.2mg, which is quite close to the intended amount of 5mg. As a first vial for malt, I'd probably set it at 250mg/5mL. That way 5 units on a syringe would be 2.5mg, which some might already consider a moderately strong dose. https://www.amazon.com/AWS-Portable-Precision-Digital-Milligram/dp/B0012TDNAM/ This scale would work fine for measuring amounts in the hundreds of milligrams. Testing has shown they can be accurate to within +-1mg in that range. Here's a Reddit post regarding the Gemini-20 scale for reference. A bunch of people have tested it for accuracy with similar results. https://www.reddit.com/r/researchchemicals/comments/a8rd3e/checked_my_gemini20_scale_with_a_set_of/

A scale like that would be good, and 100mg batches should be accurate enough. The larger your individual batch, the more wiggle room there is for volumetric dosing to produce your desired dose when drawing into a syringe. It's only when you're weighting something less than 20mg that it can be off +-5mg or more.

@bambi nice, spreading the good word I see! Everything looks good except maybe this one step: If you're referring to a weighed dose under 20mg total, any consumer milligram scale is going to be pretty inaccurate. And that could equal a trip way stronger than you're expecting when it comes to injection. https://en.psychonautwiki.org/wiki/Dosage_measurement

That's something I'd really like to better understand as well lol. I think the attainment of the siddhis (I'll just use that word as a stand-in) obviously goes down a similar developmental track as enlightenment, but it's somehow not 1:1. So even the attainment of the supreme identity, even while flowing in an embodied state, doesn't seem to develop siddhis as a necessity. I think they can more so be compared to a separate learned skill, like how becoming enlightened wouldn't suddenly make you better at any other Earthly activity such as sports. And somehow the ignorance of their existence has kept even highly achieved people from knowing where to put their efforts. A lot of the stuff I'm saying isn't guesses, but rather it's based on direct experience. I've been very sidetracked and wasted a bunch of years when I should have been focused squarely on consciousness as yourself and some others teach. Aiming for something like siddhis first and foremost probably universally ends in only minor success and ultimately disappointment and failure. But it's been more than enough to make me 100% sure of their existence, which I guess is a gift in itself. Everything I'm describing is all my relative experience though. From an absolute perspective, I get where you're coming from when you say Consciousness is omnipotence. When you're in that ultimate state existing as God from God's view, it's obvious any infinite number of potentials may happen, and the shit I typed above loses grounding and significance. I don't know how to reconcile the infinite power of that realization with the limits of embodied life. It's like some kind of paradox.

I'm not taking his side in your guys' back-and-forth here, but my answer is that it appears you can have one without the other and vice versa.

@Water by the River it looks like you're into the weeds similar to myself. Haven't you ever come across the explanation of the siddhis' trigger being partially within the dream itself? Meaning it becomes an expression of a natural capability inherent to the human body. Not really different from using your muscles and coordination to throw a baseball. It's just obviously much more subtle and difficult to bring the control mechanism into awareness than mere physical movement.

I'm absolutely with you on the notion that the teachers we hear about are missing a large piece of the story. And a chunk of it has to do with the full range of human potential. What if the mechanism behind being able to walk through a brick wall or manipulate the local gravity around you (among other abilities) had a grounding in physical science? Like an electromagnetic emanation controlled via the higher functions in a human body? And what if electromagnetism, when applied in particular frequencies and amplitudes, was capable of specific extraordinary effects? Similar to how at a certain temperature, the effect of ignition and fire is produced. I'm not a scientist, so I'm sure my use of terms is crude, but the general sentiment is all there. Does this ring any bells for anyone, or does it just sound like psycho-babble?

I realize this is kind of irrelevant to the point you're making, but do you leave open the possibility that a highly advanced human may be theoretically capable of these types of things using their innate (though atrophied) capabilities? I'm speaking of course in the outer world. Just curious where you stand on something like that.

@Bufo Alvarius Correct, not to mention the limits it would place on technological advancement. These types of things are often understood using the worshipping and mythological portions of our minds, but analyzing them from a mechanistic and scientific point of view could unlock unthinkable potential.