MVPJOURNEY

@Max1993 Is there an original pusher? If there's not and this moment is unlimited then there's just an unfolding. So no free will, and no need for there to be unless you have a thought that you have free will for some thought structure reasoning. You might agree on that, just curious on your position.

This video and the image at 24 minutes was the first time i got a taste of what was being spoken about re the thought structure, thought I'd share I watched this video over and over, it felt like something was on the tip of my tongue (In my mind), haha.

Just to confirm you can't break it down further into something someone with a lower conciousness state might be able to grasp? Not disagreeing, just hard to relate to what you are saying. It felt like in the first post you stated that Will birthed the entire universe, which implies a starting point. Now you are saying it's ever present. Is it a feeling you have? I understand reality is love for example, from an experience. I have also overlayed a conceptual understanding of that which decribes the experience i had, which is relevant to me but could be totally meaingless to someone who hasn't had the experience. Do you have a similar conceptual understanding of Will that is manifesting through you that you can share to see if i can grasp it?

@theleelajoker It's difficult for people to see life from where you are at and speak from there so it's relatable. I would like to give my perspective though, it feels like based on the OP that you've shifted the ego's ways of perceiving reality. This can be productive and positive however it's not the same as seeing through what the thought structure actually is as a whole thing and therefore seeing whats outside of that (Which is the dream, oneness etc etc). This is where it feels like @JoshB and @Inliytened1 are speaking from - and i agree with (Not to speak for them, that's my own perspective of what I read). You asked for a concrete example on how things changed when shifting from commnuicating from before and after the shift happened. For me the thought structures and patterns stayed mostly the same (It's seperate work to update the conditioning and thought processes) but everything does seem lighter and clearer, so (for me) it doesn't hurt as much as before when a girlfriend wants to leave for example, because you know the thing that moves away is a combination of thought structures (belief systems, patterns the mind has from trauma experienced etc), and it's not personal, those thought structures don't mesh with your own. After I saw through the illusion of the thought structure (It didn't stop talking, I just saw exactly what it was so could more easily work with thoughts that didn't feel in alignment with how i wanted to experience life) it made it far easier to find a great partner who I aligned with and remove women who didn't align quickly and leave them without guilt or "what ifs" constantly arising. I saw myself for exactly who i was, and i saw her for exactly who she was and it made it easy to make a decision. Before that I had lots of stories arising that i believed in, not seeing the truth infront of me.

@Salvijus This "now", this "canvas" that has unfolding playing out. Why do we need to assume it once had a will which started everything? And that it wasn't always moving? (Or more accurately that it wasn't always still - yet creations emerged). To say it willed this entity/universe into existence feels a step overlayed with a thought? Isn't it more accurate to say we don't know ultimate truth on how things emerge but we can know "now".

To me it's not obvious. Thought patterns have to emerge to imagine others are real. I'm not saying you are wrong, just that we don't know it to be true. If thought spoke it, it must be true

Depends on your concept of surrender in this context? When "i" hear surrender in this context, my thought patterns (at this point in my journey - it was different before) take me towards a conceptual understanding that each movement leads to the next (Whatever sense awareness points at in a particular moment forces the next movement). If I track it back to birth and see that my circmstances at birth, combined with my up to date conditioning (Moment by moment) resulted in the next movement, am i really in control? If not then who I am? Am I the movement? Perhaps not. There are obviously lot's of ways people can misinterpret what's being said in that video and use it to add to the movement in a negative way, if that happens I would say it goes against what you are looking for. Not wrong, just not aligned with why you asked the question.

The thought structure that debates itself would like to know one way or the other. Whichever thought pattern wins the arugment is your truth. Ultimate truth is everything just is. Whether we have true freedom or not is irrelvant if you have no thought structure asking the question (Or at least recognise the thought structure as a whole thing seperate from "now"). Earlier in my journey the contemplations of the thought structure determined there was no freedom. i think that's how this human experience is better to live. Imagine you think everyone truly has freedom so people are just out there choosing conciously to cause suffering instead of being loving.

Love the honesty from everyone on this. I felt this feeling in a big way before as well and thoughts and feelings can still arise. Internally I had to be perfect because of how my mother treated me (telling me i wasn’t good enough constantly or that she wished i was more like xyz kid), this led to feeling inadequate when in the presence of others success despite being quite successful myself (comparatively to the people around me - which i later found out i surrounded myself with to feel less inadequate). The good news (or bad news) is that you’ll always have a chance to work on this until it’s resolved internally because they’ll always be people better than you at something (as is the case for all humans). 😅 Hope you have a productive time with the therapist tomorrow 🙏

I used the awareness method to overcome my porn addiction. The “catch” moment i had with my thoughts was that even by focusing on not wanting porn, i kept the thought alive, and the habit was able to feed off that. Part of awareness (at least for me) was watching the thought arise to watch porn, then watching the thought of “i shouldn’t be doing this” and the back and forth between the two (which ultimately always led to relapse) and accepting both without attaching myself to the outcome (i did relapse a few times before being able to sit with that full back and forth and letting it fizzle out, it got weaker and weaker over time) i tried everything else people are mentioning and would always find myself going back to my addiction. I feel like habits from a young age like these can be just as hard as some of the intense drug addictions and everyone has their own “puzzle” in the mind to solve, just because the pattern in the mind is so strong and repeated so many times its engrained in us, and it’s very difficult to work out the patterns. I should also mention i found this by contemplation after relapses (which Leo has a good video on how to contemplate), just to try and work out the root cause. It did take a long time and i was trying other more general things during that time - however this ultimately worked. Good luck to you 🙏

I think add - no addictions or overcome addictions - not even hard stuff eg binge watching social media, porn, unhealthy foods (you can still have abs and be unhealthy inside) i don’t feel like learning another language would add much, same with creating art. I think they are more personal excitements, not required for a beautiful life. But that could be bias on my part.

Thanks for the reply. I'll think about swimming laps. I haven't done much swimming since childhood so might be fun as well. Haha.

Hello, I have had some realizations over the last year or so about the illusory nature of my thoughts. It's quite clear they are not me although I'm sure I'm still self-deceived in many ways even if I've dissolved many conceptual frameworks and beliefs over the last year after that heavy realization (During an LSD trip while watching Leo's video on meditation to realize you are god - then subsequent solo MDMA trips to uncover past traumas and missing pieces of my egos life puzzle). I've been feeling lately that life is quite pointless and I reviewed some older forum posts on the subject and a few people suggested the key may be in feelings. So I'm wondering if feelings have the same quality as thoughts in the sense they are illusory in a similar way? I guess I'm asking because I've not really focused much on feelings during the last 7 years or so of this spiritual journey and intuitively i sensed this may be something that requires some time invested, but I just wanted to understand why those people were saying that before I put a big focus into this. Lately I also feel like I have a lot of energy built up within me, I gym 4 times a week and do yoga and runs a couple of times a week + eat what i believe most people would consider very healthy in alignment with that exercise routine but this doesn't seem to be going away and if i don't exercise it gets very intense and i struggle to sleep or sit still, it's led to a lot of tenseness within my body and a very tight jaw. So I'm wondering if this also may have something to do with unreleased feelings? (It was quite a lot of semi-intense realizations I had getting to see the previously shut away parts of my life story during the MDMA trips, past traumas, blocked out difficult parts of my life etc, so that may be playing a part also) Any thoughts on this would be appreciated as It's getting difficult working through different possibilities whilst having the overload of energy. Cheers!