shree

I have a girl-friend who has been into me for a long time, and she’s bisexual. She told me that if we were together, she would even be open to bringing other girls into the relationship and wouldn't mind at all. Maybe you should set a goal for finding someone like that? Just make sure it aligns with your values.

What topic are you interested in?

Update on My Healing Journey This past week has been transformative for me. During my bike rides to work, I’ve experienced moments of pure joy and even an infinite, psychedelic-like feeling. Completely drug-free. It’s as if I’m unlocking new levels of happiness that I didn’t know existed. My connection with people has improved, my relationships feel much healthier, and my emotional self-control has reached new heights. Even occasional sadness now feels stunningly amazing. I’ve also finally found the source of my brain fog and lethargy, allowing me to do amazing weight training without any pre-workouts. Despite my car being damaged in a costly traffic accident and going through the worst belly pain of my life a few days ago, I’ve kept my balance. As Aerosmith says, "Sing with me, sing for the year, sing for the laughter, sing for the tear. Sing with me, if it's just for today, maybe tomorrow the good Lord will take you away." That’s exactly what I’m doing - grateful for these breakthroughs and the progress!

I’ve decided to start a public journal here, not just to share my experiences but to document my journey of self-discovery and healing. My first post isn’t merely a trip report; it’s a deep dive into the layers of my psyche, exploring how my past, traumas, and inner work are shaping the person I’m becoming. I’m here to be honest, vulnerable, and to share the lessons I’m learning along the way. Let this be a space where we can all reflect, grow, and support each other on our paths. Feel free to comment if anything resonates with you or touches you in some way. Thank you for taking the time to read.

Overdoing it can definitely harm your life. I believe that's what OP is highlighting.

@jacknine119 Dude, I had this whole plan for some deep emotional work today, but I just couldn’t stop laughing at your post title. "Help me!! I am horny" ... man, you made it look so serious, yet I kept imagining you standing there, deadpan, with a big banana in your pants. Honestly, you made my day! Now, on a serious note: Listen, you don’t need to go hardcore with no-fap or other extremes. You’re a young guy with a high libido,and that’s totally normal. Yeah, your brain might wander to wild scenarios like banging your sexy aunt and maybe some other female family members eventualy join.. .. hey, no judgment here, our brains can be weird places sometimes. Especialy for those of us who have infinite libido. By the way, I invested 2 quadrillion euros into a Teal Swan course hoping to work through some heavy stuff, but man, after reading your post, I couldn’t stop laughing. So thanks for that! Seriously though, maybe try cutting down to once or twice a week. Once you find purpose or get busy with life, you’ll have less time and energy for it anyway. And yeah, getting a real woman in your life would help big time. Maybe try journaling about what’s holding you back from that and take small steps to overcome it. You’ve got this, my man!

Here is the combined list of suggested movies: 1. Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas 2. Midsommar 3. Enter the Void 4. Mulholland Drive 5. La Piel Que Habito (The Skin I Live In) 6. Vanilla Sky 7. Everything Everywhere All at Once 8. Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind 9. Source Code 10. Butterfly Effect 11. Selfless 12. Fight Club 13. Enemy 14. Reminiscence 15. Inception 16. Transcendence 17. Cloud Atlas 18. Oblivion 19. Lucy 20. Limitless 21. Once Upon a Time in Hollywood 22. The Usual Suspects 23. Waking Life 24. Mandy 25. Good Time 26. Mad God 27. Beyond the Black Rainbow 28. Eraserhead 29. Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse 30. The Abyss 31. High Dose LSD Trip Simulation 32. Doctor Strange (2016) 33. The Broken Portal 34. Undone 35. Scavengers Reign

Yes, he was an amazing human being. I have read all of his books and also did a few of his audio programs.

I will just lay here and take the shape of this random object. Dafuq you looking at, human?

This porridge looks really good! The oat milk and peanut butter already give it some nice sweetness, and you’ve got plenty of healthy stuff in there. I agree with Michael, adding some fruit like berries or banana would make it even better. It would add some fresh flavor and extra vitamins. You are off to a great start!

yeah, coffee in oatmeal is definitely an unusual combo

Coffee’s the bad guy? What’s next, yoga pants causing climate change?

@Sugarcoat, soaking oats works like soaking legumes, It helps break down the phytic acid, making them easier to digest and absorb. If you’re worried about them getting too soggy, check out steel-cut or rolled oats. They hold their texture better after soaking. You can look up more about them on the internet or any fitness sites for more info. As for the coffee, if it works for you, don’t stress about it. If it makes you happy, keep enjoying it.

@Sugarcoat If you want to make oats easier to digest, try soaking them overnight or using fermented oats. This helps break down phytic acid, making it easier for your body to absorb nutrients and reduces bloating. Kefir can add probiotics, but the acidity isn't really the key here. lol Kefir making oats more digestible because of acidity? That's a pretty wild claim. Oats don’t change like that just by adding something acidic. that's not how digestion works. It seems like you are offering lemon and vinegar as solutions without really knowing their effects on digestion.. If you really understood digestion, you woukd know it's more complicated than just adding acidic things. You're still overconfident without knowing the basic facts. I checked your posts after removing you from ignore , hoping you’d grown. But nothing’s changed, you are still trying to sound smart without real knowledge. Back to my ignore list you go. 😒

Saying Red Bull is "cleaner" because it has fewer ingredients is missing the point. Both Red Bull and Monster are packed with caffeine and sugar, which mess with your heart, blood sugar, and energy levels. You can get energy from healthier sourceswhole foods, proper sleep, and hydration.

Your claim that the vulva can’t absorb substances is embarrassingly wrong. The fact that you brush this off shows you haven’t done your homework. The vaginal walls can absorb substances, and how well they do depends on the drug. You’re oversimplifying a much more complex topic.

How high are you right now? Lose yourself: *Absolutely!*

Breaking news! Someone on Actualized.org just had an awakening that wasn't directly mentioned by Leo Gura! hurry up, Actualizers! Grab your pitchforks and stone him for blasphemy!

@Ajax I’ve spent some time reflecting on your posts, and while they often sound spiritual and wise on the surface, it's clear that you’re avoiding dealing with the deeper emotional realities of the situations you're talking about. You offer statements that seem profound, but they come across more as a way to stay distant from the emotional truth, rather than engaging with it. What I’m noticing is a pattern of spiritual bypassing ,using spirituality to avoid facing the deeper, harder emotional work. It think you’re more focused on sounding insightful than actually confronting the raw emotions and complex issues people are dealing with. This is more about keeping yourself safe from emotional vulnerability than it is about offering real, meaningful advice. It’s a common defense mechanism: "staying at a higher level " to avoid the discomfort of facing what’s underneath. But what people need isn't lofty, detached wisdom , they need real, grounded engagement with the hard stuff. That’s where true growth happens. I get that you’re trying to help in your own way, but if you really want to offer something useful, it’s time to stop avoiding the deeper emotional work and start dealing with the reality of the situation. No hard feelings, just something to think about.. But hey, I can tell you’re coming from a good place, and I appreciate the effort you’re putting in. You’ve clearly got your own way of seeing things, and that’s valuable in its own right. I can see you’re trying to share your wisdom and contribute, and that’s something I respect. Keep doing what you do, and who knows, we might all learn something from each other along the way. Take care, and I’m sending you all the best. LOVE Marin

Seven years ago, I moved 1600 km away from my entire family and started my life from scratch, but sometimes it doesn’t feel far enough. After deep psychological and emotional work, I decided that cutting them off completely—no Skype, no calls—was a necessary step. The only person I kept in contact with was my mom, and she's almost fanatically involved in Christianity, deeply influenced by her Stage Blue surroundings. After about three months of no contact, I decided to call her on Skype yesterday. We had some surface-level conversation at first, but then she subtly shifted into shaming and blaming me for not going to church, among other things. I'm 33 years old, but this still affects me, showing how deeply family roots can stay embedded in our psyche. At my core, I’m currently at Stage Yellow, but I’m far from transcending my reactions to this fundamentalist BS. It triggers me hard, and I’m aware of that. I feel like I shift into Stage Red really quickly when she starts talking about church stuff, thinking: *I am Jesus Christ, Buddha and Allah themselves, leave me the fuck alone!* I know that I should remain grounded, but I haven't mastered the emotional storm this brings. Probably a complete cut-off is necessary. Has anyone else gone through something similar? I’m just looking for some understanding from people who’ve dealt with the same. How do you manage to not let these Stage Blue triggers pull you down from your center?

Hi @Ishanga Thanks for sharing your experiences. Yes, I understand very well that behind every emotional response, there’s a clue. I haven’t reacted badly to it because I do somewhat understand her struggles. The problem arises when it starts affecting you in a toxic way, especially when you’re trying to heal from the damage caused by that same person - maybe indirectly or unconsciously, but the harm is still there. It’s tough to maintain that balance of empathy and self-preservation, but I’m learning to prioritize my own healing without guilt.

@QVx Finally, a post from someone who has been through similar things. Thank you for sharing your experiences. I also wanted to give her a chance to express how she feels in a peaceful way, so I could also share my authentic self. But in families like this, it feels like you’re stuck in a role they gave you long ago, and you're not allowed to show your true self. I realized that approach wouldn’t work. Like you, I came to the conclusion that maybe we could have contact every few months, but that kind of relationship feels superficial, and I have no interest in anything one-sided or shallow. Psychologists with a lot of experience, both personally and with patients who have been through similar situations, often recommend cutting ties with toxic family members until you’ve healed. When you heal, you can reach a state where forgiveness comes naturally, and at that point, it may become possible to have a relationship with them that no longer negatively affects you or puts you back in the same toxic patterns. That sounds like good advice. I want deep, authentic connections, and my last contact with her made me realize that we were never so far apart. So, I’ve pretty much decided to cut her off as well.

I'm okay with this thread being locked now, if the moderator feels it's appropriate. Thanks

@Ajax I appreciate your perspective, and I’ll assume you’re referring to higher states of awareness where we experience ourselves as infinite, creating hard shells like problems, traumas, and victim mentalities to keep ourselves in a lower state. I’ve touched on those experiences too, but for me, the real breakthrough came through deep emotional work, tapping into my worst emotions. That’s when I had my biggest awakening. ---- It’s not about holding onto pain or justifying anything. It’s about recognizing when certain relationships, even after experiencing very high levels of awareness, are no longer healthy. Cutting ties can be an act of self-love and protection, not weakness. I appreciate your effort to show me parts where you think I might be blind, but I wasn’t looking for someone to 'fix' me here. I was seeking understanding and compassion from people who have gone through similar experiences. Thanks for your kind words nonetheless.