Spiritual Warrior

Habits & Disciplines Journey Entry #120 3.1.26 Morning Routine: Make bed: 0 Journal: 119 Brush teeth streak: 119 Floss streak: 0 Shower streak: 93 Meditation streak: 0 Approaching women visualization: 0 Abundance of sex affirmation: 0 Funniness affirmation: 0 Independent of opinions of others affirmation: 0 Free talk exercise: 0 Night time routine goals: Brush teeth streak: 1 Wash face streak: 1 No electronics before bed: 1 "Whole day" goals: No ejaculation streak: 27 Eat 150 g of protein streak: 0 No alcohol streak: 121 No smoking weed streak: 0 Total number of women cold approached: 5

Hi, I'm a ballroom dance instructor so I have lots of experience in these dance setting, salsa clubs, ballroom events, etc. Yes, you're right bachata can be a very sensual dance. From my experience, despite how sensual it can get, its just a dance, there isn't anything past that. You enjoy a dance with another human being, you give them a high five or a hug at the end of it and then you move onto the next partner. This is how most of the people feel that are immersed in the dance culture. When you are new to it, it does seem overwhelming and maybe even wrong but again, it's just a dance, you get used to it.

Interlude: I am not a lyricist, I am just a bastard child, here to experiment I want to start taking my life more seriously mainly on the spiritual front. I am all set up to be a successful dancer and dance instructor. All of that will fall into place, as well as my intimate relationship, this all has its place and I can let go and coast off of the foundation that I have built. Where I need a conscious push is in my spiritual pursuit. I am not taking this seriously and I am in a place in which I have so much damn potential. I understand what it means to be enlightened on a conceptual level, which is a rare thing. I understand that a human being increases his level of consciousness in stages. I understand that it is going to take an experimental shift towards the Truth. I can also feel that something is off in my life right now, I see that everything that I am doing is shallow, it lacks meaning. More important to this I might add is how on earth do you know what to pursue when you don't know what the Truth about reality entails? You have it ass backwards.. you are right now pursuing things without knowing how everything works. But how could I understanding everything, is that even possible? I don't know but I'm willing to put in the work to find out.

Interlude: Move on Beginnings always hide themselves in ends. Truthfully, I've been feeling very sluggish recently and I have no one to hang out with on the weekends. This is sad to me as I used to have a girlfriend that I could always kick it with. I need new friends to go out with, I need a new life. I am sick of the life that I've been living. But what do I want? I want to be disciplined and meditate every day. I want to be clear headed. I want to be able to approach any woman out there in the wild and call her beautiful. I want to keep going down this path of self mastery and self discovery, no breaks, no more getting off. Continue to push yourself out of your comfort zone, even when you don't want to, especially when you don't want to. We are all rooting for you. Attract anything and everything that you want into your life. Only you have the power to do this. I am going to become a famous and very important figure within the dance community. I am going to inspire others, old and young to maximize their full potential and to be fully creative and expressive and hard working in their endeavors. Never settle. Always continue down your path until you reach the end. I am the greatest thing to happen to this studio. I teach 30 lessons a week. I win every dance competition that I enter. I have an amazing girlfriend that loves and takes care of me. I have a magnetic masculine presence that women cannot get enough of. I am also humble and quiet when I need to be. I am amazing at sex, able to last for hours without cumming while my girl cums over and over and over again. I have a nice house that is totally paid off. I make millions of dollars doing the one thing that I love, dancing. I am an emotioanlly mature person that does not get effected easily by the opinions of others. I am emotionally sound and grounded, able to handle life's challenges with calm and ease. I read lots of books in my spare time, creating a wealth of knowledge within my brain. I am disciplined, when I say I'm going to wake up at a certain time, you can be dammned sure I'm waking up at that time. I am the man who knocks. I am the guy that your attention should be on. I command attention. I dominate situations when I need to. At the same time, I am capable of completely shutting off my brain. I am organized and ready for war when I am called upon. My car is clean and I am ready for anything.

Habits & Disciplines Journey Entry #118 I had an interesting morning yesterday. I finally admitted to my dance partner that I have feelings for her, but the way that I framed it (in order to protect myself) was that it is not ideal because she used to date my friend and I would ideally like a dance partner that I am not romantic with. I told her that I feel bad for having the feelings towards her because of my friend but at the same time I can't control how I feel. She said she appreciated me telling her that and that she still has feelings for her ex, who is my friend. So basically she does not see me like that and it is partially because she still has feelings for her ex. I am very proud of myself for finally having the difficult conversation with her. Now, where do I go from here? Right now I am feeling very vulnerable and hurt, as if I just opened up a wound and now it is susceptible to infection and salt being thrown into it. At the same time I do feel free, as if a huge weight has been lifted off of my chest. I can now hit on any woman that I want without having to give her a second thought. For a while I didn't want to hit on others "out of respect" for her which was rather silly in hindsight, but I guess I was being empathetic in a way. I will bring up memories that I have with this girl that are very memorable to me and she barely even remembers them. This honestly says a lot. I kind of hate this girl right now, I also think that she doesn't deserve me liking her, she is all over the place, she's not really that caring, yeah I fuckin' hate her right now... Why do I have to like her... she didn't deserve to have her ego built up. When all of this went down, thats how it felt, it felt like I was building her ego up while tearing my own ego down. But at the same time, this vulnerability is what it takes in the dating world and you're going to have to get used to it so it is a good growth experience. So yeah I'll probably hate her for a little while even though she doesn't deserve it. My ultimate goal however is to deal with this with "dispassion" and "detachment" in which my emotions are not swayed either way, I am centered and grounded. But in reality, I do feel jaded after this incident and I wish I didn't give her the fulfillment of having someone like her. I gave her the satisfaction of knowing that someone finds her attractive and is interested in exploring the romantic side of things, this must have stroked her ego. It just kind of pisses me off that I did that for her while my ego takes a hit because she doesn't feel the same way about me. I'm so sick of all of these fuckin' girls in the studio that I dance with. Maybe I need new dance partners. They're so fuckin' annoying because I always end up liking them, but I keep getting rejected. Its such bullshit. I don't want to dance with any of them anymore. I want to be done with it. At the same time, it is great having a competitive partner and its great having someone to work on "certification" with so I am either going to have to find a way to deal with this emotionally or maybe I could have a guy as a "certification" partner from now on. But of course, I have learned that in general, avoidance is not the answer so you should probably just stick to what you are doing. It takes a certain type of girl for me to get attracted. Unfortunately the types of girls that I am attracted to are my two dance partners. I've had other dance partners before in which I wasn't attracted to them, that was much easier because there wasn't an underlying "I want to fuck you" within our interactions. This is the problem, because I will become frustrated that I am not fucking them and I feel unwanted and undesired because they don't want to fuck me. Side note: Foxtrot Explosion move is left foot forward, right foot forward, then left foot forward, then right foot back, then you get into the the "run around" part - such a cool move! Another thing that I am realizing is that I am far too selfish. I thought that I was more conscious than I actually am, but in reality I am a big old hypocrite that only cares about himself and that can't even meditate every day for one week. This is going to be a transition period for me as I continue to navigate the dating field. I would also really like to start getting back into spirituality as I have been learning that I want to fulfill my duties in the LOC 400s area in which I start to use my mind to catapult myself into material success. This requires my mind to be clear and focused on my goals. It requires discipline and execution. By the end of that journey, I will be ready and willing to transcend into the LOCS 500 and beyond. I also want to start taking The Book of Not Knowing more seriously as I love learning more about Truth work. Also, continue to work on emotional mastery while you're at work and your dealings with dance partners and women that you are dating. In terms of dating, you are now approaching girls occasionally, you have one woman that you're talking to, and another girl messaged you on IG saying that she wants to hang out in a group setting. That honestly sounds great, but do I want to put the effort in and set that up? Not sure. I want to be talking to at least 5 different girls at once. That is truly what I want. I want to have such an abundance of women at my fingertips that I am completely numb to losing any one girl. I can see that this M.O. is going to get old real quick, but I believe that I have to go through a stage like that in order to practice and understand what it takes to seduce women. That is the skill that I am currently lacking. I have heard that the more women that you sleep with, the more desensitized you become to the romantic side of things. This is an unfortunate truth of the dating field. Right now, I love the romantic side of life, being in that honeymoon phase with a girl that you feel you're destined to be with in this moment is such an amazing feeling. However, I look forward to turning into "Darth Vader" in which I am going to fuck a bunch of girls. I am partially doing this because I'm mad at all the women that have hurt me. I am, I'm really mad at them. Just like many women are probably really mad at all of the men that have hurt them, its the same shit. 2.27.26 Morning Routine: Make bed: 0 Journal: 117 Brush teeth streak: 117 Floss streak: 0 Shower streak: 91 Meditation streak: 0 Approaching women visualization: 0 Abundance of sex affirmation: 0 Funniness affirmation: 4 Independent of opinions of others affirmation: 4 Free talk exercise: 4 Night time routine goals: Brush teeth streak: 0 Wash face streak: 0 No electronics before bed: 0 "Whole day" goals: No ejaculation streak: 25 Eat 150 g of protein streak: 1 No alcohol streak: 119 No smoking weed streak: 74 Total number of women cold approached: 5 Habits & Disciplines Journey Entry #119 2.28.26 Morning Routine: Make bed: 0 Journal: 118 Brush teeth streak: 118 Floss streak: 0 Shower streak: 92 Meditation streak: 0 Approaching women visualization: 0 Abundance of sex affirmation: 0 Funniness affirmation: 0 Independent of opinions of others affirmation: 0 Free talk exercise: 0 Night time routine goals: Brush teeth streak: 0 Wash face streak: 0 No electronics before bed: 0 "Whole day" goals: No ejaculation streak: 26 Eat 150 g of protein streak: 0 No alcohol streak: 120 No smoking weed streak: 0 Total number of women cold approached: 5

Interlude: I will never be depressed I just watched a video of Connor McGregor saying that he is fighting with depression every day. This is a man that is one of the most widely known and most famous UFC fighters ever to step foot in the octagon. He has more money than he needs, has an amazing wife, and is a master in his field. Now why is he depressed in his years of retirement? Because he never transcended out of stage orange in the spiral dynamics ladder. He wants to continue to produce at a high level and kick people's asses but he is out of his prime, his body will not allow him to compete in that way anymore. The cool thing about myself is I know for a fact that I will never be depressed by life because I understand the trajectory of things based on my understanding of spiral dynamics as well as Ramaji's level of consciousness map. So sometimes I question why I spent so much time in my early 20s reading about spirituality when I should have been chasing girls and developing a career, but it is this foundational knowledge that has given me such an eagle's eye scope of reality. This understanding allows me to not be bothered by tiny things in day to day life because my life has an overarching trajectory and my overall goal is to just let go and enjoy the ride. And this is not some wishful thinking bullshit, this is me touching the spiritual side of life, the letting go side of life, the surrendering to the cosmos side of life.

Habits & Disciplines Journey Entry #117 2.26.26 Morning Routine: Make bed: 0 Journal: 116 Brush teeth streak: 116 Floss streak: 0 Shower streak: 90 Meditation streak: 4 Approaching women visualization: 0 Abundance of sex affirmation: 0 Funniness affirmation: 3 Independent of opinions of others affirmation: 3 Free talk exercise: 3 Night time routine goals: Brush teeth streak: 4 Wash face streak: 4 No electronics before bed: 0 "Whole day" goals: No ejaculation streak: 24 Eat 150 g of protein streak: 0 No alcohol streak: 118 No smoking weed streak: 73 Total number of women cold approached: 5

Interlude: What do I want? 2/26/26 I want a highly conscious girlfriend that I can have fun with I want to get really good at sex, never ejaculating and lasting for hours I want to be a world champion dancer, very masculine and expressive on the dance floor I want to express my attraction towards a female in a confident, fun, expressive, direct and respectful way I want to teach 30 lessons a week I want to be full gold certified in dancing I want to have lots of sex I want to master my emotions, being able to regulate and handle difficult situations with calm and grace I want to be in a constant no - thought state, completely surrendering to the present moment at all times I want to be a supremely attractive man not just in looks but in the way that I carry myself I want to be able to let go of attachments with ease I want to view the world and handle situations with a pure detachment and dispassion I want to be able to have very honest and direct communications with women I want to be able to tell a woman that I have feelings for her I want to be emotionally mature and be direct in my confrontations I want to take every situation that I experience as a learning process, one that is going to push me to grow I want to make lots of money doing what I love I want to host parties in the summer at my house with a pool and outdoor bar, surrounded by all the people that I love I want to go on incredible adventures with my awesome girlfriend

Habits & Disciplines Journey Entry #116 I have been doing really well recently, I've been consistent, I understand my vision, I have a girl that I'm dating, I am actively approaching women and hitting on them, things are really clicking. The funny thing is the better that I am doing, the less likely I am to include a personal journal on this thread. I usually come on here to vent about things when something is going awry. But when theres nothing to vent about, nothing gets written. There is one thing though: there is a girl (not the girl I'm dating) that I cannot get out of my head. She is crazy but at the same time intoxicating. She is one of the funniest women I've ever met, she is an impressive dancer, and is super creative. Overall, she has this intoxicating feminine energy that I cannot get enough of. On the downside, her emotional states fluctuate like crazy, she can be depressed one day and then act like a giddy school girl the next. She has a lot of emotional mastery work that she must get done before becoming someone that is capable of being a stable girlfriend. I would characterize my dating life with the song listed below. The line "You do make me hard, but she makes me weak" is absolutely perfect. The girl that I am dating does make me hard, but this other girl makes me weak in the knees. This other girl will end up being my mistake.. I do see a future with her, or at least I want a future with her. I want to provide her with the masculine energy that she needs in order for her true feminine self to flourish. That is my role as her dance partner, but I want to make this my role in every day life. Will this actually come into fruition... only God knows. The cool thing about all of this is I know that this is a long term vision. I am going to continue to see this girl on a weekly basis. In the meantime, I am going to continue to date other people and develop myself into the perfect "provider guy" for my future wife. If I don't end up with her, I will end up with someone that is an even better fit for me. 2.25.26 Morning Routine: Make bed: 5 Journal: 115 Brush teeth streak: 115 Floss streak: 8 Shower streak: 89 Meditation streak: 3 Approaching women visualization: 3 Abundance of sex affirmation: 3 Funniness affirmation: 2 Independent of opinions of others affirmation: 2 Free talk exercise: 2 Night time routine goals: Brush teeth streak: 3 Wash face streak: 3 No electronics before bed: 0 "Whole day" goals: No ejaculation streak: 23 Eat 150 g of protein streak: 3 No alcohol streak: 117 No smoking weed streak: 72 Total number of women cold approached: 5

Habits & Disciplines Journey Entry #115 2.24.26 Morning Routine: Make bed: 4 Journal: 114 Brush teeth streak: 114 Floss streak: 7 Shower streak: 88 Meditation streak: 2 Approaching women visualization: 2 Abundance of sex affirmation: 2 Funniness affirmation: 1 Independent of opinions of others affirmation: 1 Free talk exercise: 1 Night time routine goals: Brush teeth streak: 2 Wash face streak: 2 No electronics before bed: 2 "Whole day" goals: No ejaculation streak: 22 Eat 150 g of protein streak: 2 No alcohol streak: 116 No smoking weed streak: 71 Total number of women cold approached: 5

Habits & Disciplines Journey Entry #114 2.23.26 Morning Routine: Make bed: 3 Journal: 113 Brush teeth streak: 113 Floss streak: 6 Shower streak: 87 Meditation streak: 1 Approaching women visualization: 1 Abundance of sex affirmation: 1 Funniness affirmation: 0 Independent of opinions of others affirmation: 0 Free talk exercise: 0 Night time routine goals: Brush teeth streak: 1 Wash face streak: 1 No electronics before bed: 1 "Whole day" goals: No ejaculation streak: 21 Eat 150 g of protein streak: 1 No alcohol streak: 115 No smoking weed streak: 70 Total number of women cold approached: 4

Habits & Disciplines Journey Entry #113 2.22.26 Morning Routine: Make bed: 2 Journal: 112 Brush teeth streak: 112 Floss streak: 5 Shower streak: 86 Meditation streak: 0 Approaching women visualization: 0 Abundance of sex affirmation: 0 Night time routine goals: Brush teeth streak: 0 Wash face streak: 0 No electronics before bed: 0 "Whole day" goals: No ejaculation streak: 20 Eat 150 g of protein streak: 0 No alcohol streak: 114 No smoking weed streak: 69

Habits & Disciplines Journey Entry #112 2.21.26 Morning Routine: Make bed: 1 Journal: 111 Brush teeth streak: 111 Floss streak: 4 Shower streak: 85 Meditation streak: 0 Approaching women visualization: 0 Abundance of sex affirmation: 0 Night time routine goals: Brush teeth streak: 7 Wash face streak: 7 No electronics before bed: 0 "Whole day" goals: No ejaculation streak: 19 Eat 150 g of protein streak: 4 No alcohol streak: 113 No smoking weed streak: 68

We are all One

Habits and Disciplines Journey Entry #110 What do you want? I want a house with a pool in the back. I want a woman that I love more than anything in this fuckin’ universe. I want to feel my emotions and allow them to run their course. I want to have control over my mind. I want to surrender to the spiritual side of life. I want financial freedom in which I can do anything that I want. I want a period in my life in which I have sex with lots of different women. I want to have amazing sex, sex that lasts hours, I want to give these beautiful women something that they’ve never experienced before. I want to have a shredded physique, one that inspires men and women to accomplish and go after all of their goals. I want to win dance competitions. I want to make a profound impact on every student that walks through that door. I want to have a good work ethic. I want to be built differently, with fire in my eyes and in my heart. I want to be charismatic and charming and funny. I want to have a serious work ethic, one that other people only dream of having. I want my physique to be ridiculously shredded like Channing Tatum in Magic Mike or Zac Efron in Baywatch. I want every girl that dates me to feel like they have won the fuckin’ lottery. Now I have to go to work. 2.19.26 Morning Routine: Make bed: 0 Journal: 109 Brush teeth streak: 109 Floss streak: 2 Shower streak: 83 Meditation streak: 3 Approaching women visualization: 3 Abundance of sex affirmation: 3 Night time routine goals: Brush teeth streak: 5 Wash face streak: 5 No electronics before bed: 5 "Whole day" goals: No ejaculation streak: 17 Eat 150 g of protein streak: 3 No alcohol streak: 111 No smoking weed streak: 66 Habits & Disciplines Journey Entry #111 2.20.26 Morning Routine: Make bed: 0 Journal: 110 Brush teeth streak: 110 Floss streak: 3 Shower streak: 84 Meditation streak: 0 Approaching women visualization: 0 Abundance of sex affirmation: 0 Night time routine goals: Brush teeth streak: 6 Wash face streak: 6 No electronics before bed: 6 "Whole day" goals: No ejaculation streak: 18 Eat 150 g of protein streak: 3 No alcohol streak: 112 No smoking weed streak: 67

I had the same thing going on in my psyche about 5 years ago. I used pursuing spirituality as a way to distract myself from dealing with my authentic desires of getting laid, finding a job that I love, and developing more mature relationships with family and friends. Reading spiritual books and meditating were more comfortable than dealing with the real life challenges in the world, in other words "developing the ego." This wasn't necessarily a mistake, I gained foundational knowledge of what spiritually is and what it takes to pursue Truth, but I was not ready in the slightest to truly pursue Truth. The thing is that Truth is not going to get you laid, it's not going to make you money, it's not going to get you fame, it's not going to get you a house. So if you still have these desires, the ego development route is the better path until you "burn through your karma." The cool thing about your situation is that you will be meditating consistently through your work, which is a great habit to instill in the pursuit of Truth down the road. Best of luck to you brother, I relate to your situation.

Habits and Disciplines Journey Entry #108 If I am going to meet all of my goals I have to become more organized in order to be successful. My mind is far too messy and I don't know how to organize things in my daily life for more success. The problem is that things are always in flux and I quite frankly don't have control and a good grasp on my schedule. How am I going to deal with this? I truly love this girl so much that I see a future with her. But at the same time I'm not where I need to be so pursuing her wouldn't even make sense and I also wouldn't know how to go about it until I maximize my full potential as an attractive man. This requires me to make more money which can be found in the dancing world. That is what I truly want. I want to get really fuckin good at dancing. Like it is my passion and ultimate desire to just get so nasty at it. However, when I'm in the studio I don't always show that and practice what I preach. Why do I go on these rabbit holes of non productivity? I am certainly not okay with it. I have so many goals, why am I not working on my shit every chance I get? This is going to change. I am going to cut things out completely, such as Instagram, YouTube, scrolling… it all has to stop. That is what it is going to take. Take your life and produce something remarkable. You will provide value and people will pay you lots of money for services. Embody the truth in every action that you take. The money, the sex, the fame, anything that you desire will follow. The universe is on your side but things do not get handed to you, you have to have an intent to create something remarkable. And be disciplined in your practices in order to make your vision come to life. Stop thinking about random shit and become centered and grounded in what you want. Focus. Focus. Focus. Don't be needy. Be useful. Be valuable. Be non dependent. Be independent from everyone else. Don't spend money on shit you don't need. Save your money. Save it and spend it on things that will create lasting value for yourself. 2.17.26 Morning Routine: Make bed: 2 Journal: 108 Brush teeth streak: 108 Floss streak: 1 Shower streak: 82 Meditation streak: 2 Approaching women visualization: 2 Abundance of sex affirmation: 2 Night time routine goals: Brush teeth streak: 4 Wash face streak: 4 No electronics before bed: 4 "Whole day" goals: No ejaculation streak: 16 Eat 150 g of protein streak: 2 No alcohol streak: 110 No smoking weed streak: 65 Habits and Disciplines Journey Entry #109 2.18.26 Morning Routine: Make bed: 3 Journal: 109 Brush teeth streak: 109 Floss streak: 2 Shower streak: 83 Meditation streak: 3 Approaching women visualization: 3 Abundance of sex affirmation: 3 Night time routine goals: Brush teeth streak: 5 Wash face streak: 5 No electronics before bed: 5 "Whole day" goals: No ejaculation streak: 17 Eat 150 g of protein streak: 3 No alcohol streak: 111 No smoking weed streak: 66

Habits and Disciplines Journey Entry #107 2.16.26 Morning Routine: Make bed: 1 Journal: 107 Brush teeth streak: 107 Floss streak: 0 Shower streak: 81 Meditation streak: 1 Approaching women visualization: 1 Abundance of sex affirmation: 1 Night time routine goals: Brush teeth streak: 3 Wash face streak: 3 No electronics before bed: 3 "Whole day" goals: No ejaculation streak: 15 Eat 150 g of protein streak: 1 No alcohol streak: 109 No smoking weed streak: 64

The universe will give you anything that you ask for

Habits and Disciplines Journey Entry #105 Over the weekend, I went out with one of my only single friends. We went to a nightclub that played salsa and bachata music. I was really feeling myself that night and this is the perfect setting for me because 1. they're playing music that I know how to dance well to and 2. Its still a nightclub, so people are trying to get laid. The salsa clubs I usually go to are for dancers, not people trying to get laid. This nightclub is a much better option given what I'm trying to work on. Anyways, shortly after walking in, I confidently went up to this older women with a slender, petite build and asked her to dance. As I was talking to her, she was very responsive, getting super close to me, and not letting go of my hand. However, she told me that she didn't want to dance yet because there was no one on the floor so I told her I'd come back in 15 minutes. I then approach a couple of latina ladies at the bar. The thing with this is that you really can't tell if they are going to be attractive until you're right up close. As I'm walking over there, I have to quickly decide which girl I want to ask to dance. Luckily, I chose right and the girl I approached is very cute. We go out onto the dance floor and start dancing with each other with no body contact at all. Then, the next song plays and its a bachata. I put my hands out with palms facing up to invite her to place her hands in mine. I start leading her through some patterns, she knows the basic step, but she doesn't know how to turn while staying on the beat, so shes not that good at least to my standards. I am having a blast though, this is important, if you are having fun, then she is having fun. There were times when I completely disconnected from her and I was dancing by myself, playing around with my footwork, this is also nice, I'm not trying to prove anything to her, I'm enjoying myself independent from her, this is attractive. There were several times throughout the dance when I glance over at her and she cracks a smile, when a woman smiles, at always melts my heart. We danced a few songs in a row and then I gave her a high five and left to find my friend. Then I see the petite older woman again and we start dancing. We first do salsa and she can tell that I have a ballroom background. We dance a couple of times and then I ask her if she wants to grab a drink, she says shes good, but then I say I really just want to talk to you a little bit and get to know you better so lets go over here, this was a good move and she obliges. She tells me that she is a teacher and she engages with me right up close, nose to nose. Although she is very attractive, she intimidated me with her aggressive energy, which made it difficult for me to lead the interaction. She starts telling me that when we dance I should be pulling her in closer and then she gets real close to me so that she can demonstrate. She is right in between my legs, there is no space whatsoever between the fronts of our bodies. We then hit the floor and I start leading her, very quickly she tells me to bring her in close, there is heat between our bodies I never get this close to a lady while I'm dancing with her. I lead her back out of the closeness so that I can lead her through some turns, she quickly tells me to bring her in close again. Now this is a very cool experience, don't get me wrong, but she is now leading the dance, I am following her lead which is a major turn off. Ladies need to understand that the guy has to feel like he is leading the interaction or he will not feel that authentic masculine energy. A woman that enjoys leading needs to find a way to surrender to the man's lead, stop trying to control things, allow us to figure it out, you can guide sure but you cannot control us. If we feel like you are controlling or manipulating us, we will leave. And that's exactly what happened, after a couple of dances, I told her that I wanted to take a break. I then head back to the other Latina girl that I danced with earlier. I know that she could see that I was dancing with the other girl, this is actually a positive thing in terms of attraction because she is seeing firstly that I am having fun at all times and secondly, she is seeing that I have options, if I choose her by the end of the night, which we will get to later, then she will feel special in the sense that I chose her. Anyways, I get over there and I start asking her questions and I quickly realize she doesn't speak any English. We start communicating through english to spanish translator on our phones. I actually found this experience quite fun and I did learn some things about her. We are developing rapport here, this is important. She has to feel like she knows me so that she feels comfortable enough to go out on a date with me, or better yet, come home with me. We "talk," then dance a bit, then talk, then dance a bit, then talk some more. I'm actually kind of killing this shit. Eventually, I aks her if she wants to get lattes with me this week, she says yes, we exchange numbers and I even set up a time and a place right in the moment, so the date is totally set up. Now, will she bail on this date? I don't know.. but what I do know is if she does bail, then I simply did not develop enough of a rapport with her for her to be interested in me. All of these experiences are learning experiences. I am going to do my best to never get attached to any one single girl as I have a long road of me before I transform into the attractive man that I am destined to be. The other part of this is I still have residual feelings for my dance partner. This is difficult to deal with and I have to see this girl multiple times a week as we are prepping for a competition in late March. To add insult to injury, we are starting to get into the intimate side of dancing, in which we are flirting with each other while practicing our routines. I have decided that I will not hang out with her out side of the studio because if I hang out with her, my feelings for her will intensify and I will certain want more. If she asks me why I'm ducking her, I will be fully transparent and open about that. I also just realized that I set up this date with the Latina girl at the same time that we usually practice. I don't know if I did this consciously or unconsciously, it felt unconscious in the moment, but here we are and I DO NOT want to bail on this date as my dating life is my main focus right now. I now have to tell my dance partner that I made plans during our practice time. I believe that this is a growth experience for me as we may have to have a difficult conversation with each other and I am also doing what I want for myself, I want to go on this date more than having dance practice and I am sticking to that and I don't care how she feels about it. I am going to start setting boundaries with this girl as well as being more open to the fact that I am seeing other women. For a while, I hid this from her because I liked her, and I guess I thought maybe she liked me too and I didn't want her to see me hit on other women. But at the end of the day, there has been no indication that she likes me, we've never talked about having feelings for each other, she has invested nothing into me, and nothing intimate has ever happened between us. From my perspective, she is just a girl that I have a crush on. 2.14.26 Morning Routine: Make bed: 0 Journal: 105 Brush teeth streak: 105 Floss streak: 0 Shower streak: 79 Meditation streak: 0 Night time routine goals: Brush teeth streak: 1 Wash face streak: 1 No electronics before bed: 1 "Whole day" goals: No ejaculation streak: 13 Eat 150 g of protein streak: 0 No alcohol streak: 107 No smoking weed streak: 62 Habits and Disciplines Journey Entry #106 2.15.26 Morning Routine: Make bed: 0 Journal: 106 Brush teeth streak: 106 Floss streak: 0 Shower streak: 80 Meditation streak: 0 Night time routine goals: Brush teeth streak: 2 Wash face streak: 2 No electronics before bed: 2 "Whole day" goals: No ejaculation streak: 14 Eat 150 g of protein streak: 0 No alcohol streak: 108 No smoking weed streak: 63

Habits and Disciplines Journey Entry #104 Journal 2.14.26 Okay, so I am actually doing really well. A lot of things are starting to click for me in terms of being a successful dance instructor as well as a successful human, which essentially just entails becoming the person and accomplishing the things that I would like to accomplish in life. I am starting to embody a very masculine frame while at work and when I’m around people that entails what I would call being a “dog,” which entails not caring what others think, saying what I want to say when I want to say it and overall just being a fuckin’ bad ass. Truly, I have come so far in this regard. I finally feel like a real man. And the cool thing is that I am going to become more and more masculine the more I develop. This excites me. Okay, now let's take a look again at the vision I have for my life, what do I want: I want to be a world champion dancer I want to have an abundance of sexual experiences with an abundance of women I want to be able to have full-body orgasms and last hours having sex with someone I want to have a highly conscious, attractive, highly developed, fun girlfriend I want to be spiritually enlightened, or God-realized, or understand the Truth about reality, reaching consciousness level 1,000 I want to make money off of Youtube, getting passive income I want to have a self - help YouTube channel in which I help other men understand what it takes to attain a high abundance of women in their lives I want to have a nice house with a sliding door in the back that walks out to a patio, nice yard with an outdoor bar and pool, screened in porch in the front of the house, I have a large bookshelf with lots of books to read, I have a den area in which I love to read, there are lots of windows, lots of sunlight shining through. My bedroom is quaint and relaxing with ominous, outer space-like lighting. The kitchen is filled with updated appliances and lots of space to cook and clean. The overall layout of the house is very open. I want to sky dive, feeling what it feels like to fly. I want to create solo performances that move people emotionally, I want them to really FEEL it. I want to be a successful dance instructor, teaching over 30 lessons / week. I want to make $100,000 a year I want to have a shredded, God-like physique, one like Gerard Butler from 300 I want to have sexy masculine tattoos on my thighs For some reason, something has clicked inside of me and I am fully realizing that I can quite literally have anything that I want out of life. ANYTHING. And this is so obvious to me now because life is a FUCKIN’ DREAM. And you can dream up ANYTHING that you want. My understanding of this is not logical, its intuitive, I just know it. I could question whether or not this is legitimate but at the same time, I understand that I have to believe in myself in order to make these things come true into my life, so therefore questioning whether or not its possible is not resourceful or helpful to me in the slightest. So I am just going to keep on believing in myself. I have started to watch porn again. I am a bit torn by this, but the reason for it is this: my goal is to be able to be multi orgasmic and to have a complete control over my ejaculation and the circulation of my sexual energy. This requires me to be able to circulate the sexual energy throughout my body at will, with conscious intent. This requires me to masturbate and to get in touch with what it takes to not keel over and ejaculate. The more I practice this, the more control I will have over my ejaculation and sexual energy. I unfortunately am unable to in general arise sexual energy within my body without the use of porn, and that is the reason for porn entering my life again. I am content with this decision for now. Why do I struggle so much to stay motivated on the weekends? If I used even an ounce of the work ethic that I used during the week, I would be soaring above the clouds right now. I had a very awkward exchange while visiting my co workers lesson. She didnt approve of what I added to their dance and it made me feel like shit. I do not want to visit her lessons anymore. It doesn’t do a God damn thing for me. I feel masculine right now but I am not hitting on women, well, maybe I kind of am… I had a girls number but she stopped responding to me… I told a girl I liked her dress when I was out at that coffee shop. Thats not that bad. Before I get to the studio, I could try again to hit on someone, that would be nice. I have a new thing in which I really dont care if it doesnt work out with one girl, I dont give a fuck, it almost just lights a fire underneath me. But I’ve got to start getting out there and approaching once I get used to it everything is going to be cake. And I KNOW I am destined for greatness. I look around and I see people doubting themselves, thinking that they cannot get out of the hole that they are in. I am getting out and flying to the fuckin’ heavens . I’ll take every one of your students, I dont give a fuck. Look at all my goals listed above. I’m gonna fuckin’ crush this shit. Truly. 2.13.26 Morning Routine: Make bed: 0 Journal: 104 Brush teeth streak: 104 Floss streak: 0 Shower streak: 78 Meditation streak: 1 Night time routine goals: Brush teeth streak: 0 Wash face streak: 0 "Whole day" goals: No ejaculation streak: 12 Eat 150 g of protein streak: 0 No alcohol streak: 106 No smoking weed streak: 61

Habits and Disciplines Journey Entry #103 Okay, so I am starting to eliminate a lot of things from my routines. Let's recap: There is no habit to cover in terms of when I wake up anymore. I have a high enough vision and enough things to do throughout the day to warrant waking up at an early time without the “forcing” myself to do it. I also got rid of the affirmations and visualizations as if I cannot even get a meditation habit going, my chances of visualizing and affirming every day are hopeless. Let's just focus on meditating first. The biggest habit that I am trying to integrate right now is a weekly workout regimen and a meal plan that I follow through with each week, but I'm just not sure how to track that just yet. 2.12.26 Morning Routine: Make bed: 0 Journal: 103 Brush teeth streak: 103 Floss streak: 0 Shower streak: 77 Meditation streak: 0 Night time routine goals: Brush teeth streak: 1 Wash face streak: 1 "Whole day" goals: No ejaculation streak: 11 Eat 150 g of protein streak: 0 No alcohol streak: 105 No smoking weed streak: 60

Habits and Disciplines Journey Entry #102 Once I get to 90 days of not smoking weed, I am going to smoke a big fat blunt after work with my friend. These goals are not set in stone and meant to last forever. They are adjustable depending on your vision. 90 days is enough time to deplete the dependency out of my body. After that, I will reset and see if I'd like to restart the counter or allow myself to indulge in weed at times. 2.11.26 Morning Routine: Make bed: 0 Journal: 102 Brush teeth streak: 102 Floss streak: 0 Shower streak: 76 Meditation streak: 0 Night time routine goals: Brush teeth streak: 0 Wash face streak: 0 "Whole day" goals: No ejaculation streak: 10 Eat 150 g of protein streak: 0 No alcohol streak: 104 No smoking weed streak: 59

Habits and Disciplines Journey Entry #101 I am removing lots of things from this list as all of the habits that I am trying to undertake are overwhelming to my psyche and it has caused for frustration and continuing to relapse on habits. Integrating habits into your life comes in layers. You start with a few things and then they become habits and you don't have to consciously think about them anymore... and then you a few more habits. A big one that I've added to the "whole-day goals" list is "Compliment one woman's appearance" - this is a great way to ease myself into the pick up journey. I know that I am going to attain an abundance of sex in this lifetime, but I have to start with baby steps as I am currently terrified of this journey. Yesterday, I told a woman she was "wearing a nice dress" - these kinds of interactions are easy enough that I will do them - thats whats important. 2.10.26 Morning Routine: Make bed: 9 Journal: 101 Brush teeth streak: 101 Floss streak: 4 Shower streak: 75 Meditation streak: 3 Night time routine goals: Brush teeth streak: 1 Wash face streak: 1 No electronics before bed streak: 1 Belly breathing exercise: 0 "Whole day" goals: No ejaculation streak: 9 Eat 150 g of protein streak: 0 No alcohol streak: 103 No smoking weed streak: 58 Compliment a woman's appearance: 1

Transcending the Spiral, Entry #20 ~ Stage Red & Orange integration ~ February 10th, 2026 Where am I on the spiral dynamics ladder at this stage in my life? At around this time 2 years ago, I was contemplating whether or not I was ready to take the quantum leap into tier two. I now realize that I was dead wrong. I am not ready to take the quantum leap into stage yellow and may not be for another 5 years. This whole situation is interesting because the main characteristic of stage yellow is to be aware of the spiral itself and to understand that everything underneath tier two is a necessary development of the ego, which I am in tuned with. However, the second characteristic of stage yellow is to be able to zoom out and look at things in the world as “systems” and the tendency is to have a more holistic approach in which you are attempting to elevate the entire system instead of your own agenda. This is where my current situation gets in the way of living of living in a tier two way, which would be a more selfless and impactful way of living or Being. Right now, I am living at my mother's house, making $35k a year doing something that I love. My dating life is shit, I almost never have the courage to approach women, I've only had sex with two women in my life, and probably like 20 or 30 times total. So basically, my living situation and lack of sex requires me to stay in the tier one way of thinking in which I have to learn to manipulate my environment and brain power in order to achieve the material desires that I seek. The good news is that I have lots of healthy stage blue and stage green within me. I started integrating stage blue at a young age. My ability to understand right from wrong has always been good, and to this day I have a solid morale compass. I embarked on the stage green journey 8 years ago when I went vegan and traveled around the country “searching for myself” and getting into spirituality. I have always been a very empathetic person ever since youth, which made it easy to integrate this stage into my psyche. However, to truly get what we want in this world we must conquer and manipulate and in a way deceive. A human can go about this in a stage red way, which is taking things by force and doesn't take into account the negative impact that it will have on others… or it can go about this in a stage orange way, in which the spiritual side of life has at least been ignited (albeit a tiny flame.) the stage orange person gets what he wants out of life in a win-win way, in which his efforts are for the betterment of him and the person he is interacting with. I would like to share a couple of scenarios in which a stage red individual and a stage orange individual would use to accumulate wealth and sex. This is important to put awareness on because stage green and stage blue integration is not required in order to achieve things in the world, this is what stage red and orange are used for. The blue and green stages need to be integrated in order for human beings to be more integrated with love and harmony and community, but they are not responsible for making a human “get ahead in the world.” There is something about stage red that lights a fire underneath my belly. I want to taste the delicious nectar of my opponents. This is not barbaric or non-human, I am in touch with “my inner ape” which means I am in touch with exactly where I came from. In a lot of ways, my mindset is going to be entrenched in stage red’s conquer all mindset. However, I have developed myself enough to not go overboard. But truthfully, my ego or psyche has been so far removed from this kind of behavior that it yearns for a taste of this and I have to give this to myself. But again, don't worry about going overboard, you are way to empathetic and devleoped to become a true monster in this life. The more loving way to go about getting what we want in this life is to take a more stage orange approach in which every scenario is a win win. If I have sex with you, I win and you win. If I teach you how to dance, I win and you win. If you hire me, I win and you win. If you hang out with me, I win and you win. This is my goal over the next 5 years, using the stage red and stage orange mindset and the power of Thick Face Black Heart, I am going to get laid a lot, make lots of money and allow for my ego or psyche to have everything material that it craves. By then, I should be able to dissolve the selfish desires out of my system and I can start to take a look at systems thinking in a way that I can have a much more profound impact on a large group of people.