Spiritual Warrior

For me, mastery was a book that opened my eyes to how much effort and hard work it takes to master something. As a matter of fact, the mastery process is infinite, it is never done. It also introduced me to the concept of "plateauing." This is when you are training a skill and it feels like you're not getting any better. But in reality, in the midst of a "plateau" there will soon be a breakthrough. These breakthrough moments are incredibly fulfilling.

Tier two sex: A multi orgasmic man has complete control over his arousal and whether or not he ejaculates. He ejaculates if and when he wants to. He can go as long as he wants to during sex. He is in control of his sexuality. He loves deeply but is keenly aware of the edge. He teeter totters around the edge, playing with its delicious sensitivity. Adrenaline is rushing now. The young man breathes the energy up his spine inch by inch. Eventually the energy reaches his head and bursts open like a balloon It feels to him like fireworks shooting out of his head.

Tier two sex: A multi orgasmic man has complete control over his arousal and whether or not he ejaculates. He ejaculates if and when he wants to. He can go as long as he wants to during sex. He is in control of his sexuality. He loves deeply but is keenly aware of the edge. He teeter totters around the edge, playing with its delicious sensitivity. Adrenaline is rushing now. The young man breathes the energy up his spine inch by inch. Eventually the energy reaches his head and bursts open like a balloon It feels to him like fireworks shooting out of his head.

What do you want to get out of the YouTube channel?

"Is it wrong to get into relationship simply for survival reasons?" No, men and women get into relationships in order to survive. None of us are above this.

I've cried three times in front my girl. She loves the openness and vulnerability.

https://youtu.be/AksH-JEgpeM?feature=shared

There's an evolution to the work. Finding out that you're wrong is a key part of the evolutionary process.

How many books in a year is a good amount for me? I have 60 5-star books left on Leo's book list. My goal is to finish 60 within 5 years. That means by August 9th, 2029, this is exactly 1 book per month. That's totally doable for me. Find a realistic goal and start working towards it. If you want to go for one a week, hell yeah do it!

For a man, sex at tier two is not about busting a nut, it is about circulating the sexual energy throughout your body for optimal health. This requires training and an awareness of the circulation of energy within your own body. If you're interested, read the Multi Orgasmic Man by Mantak Chia.

Consistently hitting on random women is extremely challenging. This habit will not stick without serious persistence.

You are experiencing a relapse into more comfortable states of not pushing yourself out of your comfort zone ( for you it is hitting on girls). This will happen again and again for any serious change that you are trying to integrate into your life. Put awareness on it and keep trying to integrate change into your life. Be hopeful that no matter how many times you fail, you will figure it out. Good luck.

My boy Don Juan was absolutely in stage turquoise, called a "sorcerer," he was able to "see" energy flowing throughout the universe. Here are some quotes from the Carlos Castaneda books about him.

For me, I used to smoke too much weed because I didn't have anything big that I was working on. My job was training based at the time and I felt that I could smoke in the mornings and still be good for the trainings. Now that I am actually teaching lessons, (I'm a dance instructor) I know that if I smoke in the morning then I will be way too groggy to teach a good lesson. Once I realized this, weed became easy to give up. Morale of this story, I wouldn't focus your attention on not smoking weed, I would focus your attention on the rest of your life; you should have a life that is engaging enough so that you don't need a high from a drug, you should be getting this high from life itself. Ask yourself, why isn't your life structured for this sort of engagement.

At the end of the day, you are going to have to pave your own path, we can't tell you what to do here. I'll share with you what happened to me though, maybe it'll help. At the beginning of this year, I started to go out to salsa dancing clubs every week, started hitting on random girls at bars, and went to speed dating events. I started to get dates and eventually, I was dating two girls at once and continuing to go out and meet new girls. I had thought that this is exactly what I wanted, I had two girls fighting over me and I was being completely honest about what I was doing. Eventually, I grew so attached to one of the girls that it made me not want to pursue anyone else, and that is where I'm at right now, I'm very happy being committed to one girl. I think you'll know in your heart when you find the right person and want to commit all of your time and attention to her. And until then, just have fun, there are no rules that you have to follow, you are constructed them in your own head.

Hi, I lost my virginity at 29 years old, you are not alone brother. The thing that helped me the most was taking dance classes, you will gain hands on experience talking and leading women around a dance floor. This does wonders for your confidence, don't give up. Ask for what you want and keep fighting for it. Suicide is a coward's path.

Use the Sedona method: Feel into the raw sensation of the emotion Release your grasp on the emotion as if you are unclenching your fist Allow the emotion to float away. Your emotions do not control you.

You are aware of it now, that's the important thing.

I had the exact same issue, I was attracted to a woman's beauty and energy, but I never had a raw desire to fuck women. Whenever I would make out with a girl or go down on her or feel her up, I couldn't get a boner. I felt like an outcast and deeply frustrated that I never got laid. I lied about my sexual experiences to my friends because I couldn't handle the social consequences of being labeled a virgin. There are many factors that lead to this deficiency in my life, but I mainly blame my addiction to masturbation. Finally, at 28 years old I started to get into social dancing and started working at restaurants where I'd interact with women. I started to feel sexual energy coursing through my body while talking to females and dancing with them. This had literally never happened before up until this point. I finally had sex for the first time a few weeks ago and I have no issue getting it up anymore. And I've mostly dealt with my masturbation addiction at this point.

@NoSelfSelf I like the post and I agree. You're describing not a nice guy, but a chivalrous man. This kind of man will win out in the end.

Aye aye aye 🕺

Spiritual Autolysis - Journal Entry #60 - Sun June 9th '24 - 12:14 PM 🕜 What is Time? Higher self: Time. Time is nothing but a measurement that humans constructed in order to first of all measure one full day. We humans decided to equate one spin on the earths axis as one full day. This has made it easy for us to break things down, we were then able to create weeks, months, years, decades, and centuries. There are 7 days in a week or 7 spins on the earths axis, 30 days in a month or 30 spins on its axis, 365 days in a year or 365 spins on the earths axis, etc. We humans all have these clocks, they are wired into our phones and are all over our houses and are literally everywhere, this makes it easy for us to schedule things. For example, I want to meet up with my buddy for drinks at 3 o'clock, then I have to go into work at 4 o'clock, I get out of work at 10 o'clock, etc... The time that we use here on earth is not an inherent truth at all. As a matter of fact, there is no truth to it, it's just made things easier for us humans and it makes a lot of sense to break things down this way, good job humans ;). Now, let's get back to what we were talking about yesterday about I am ness. We had I am ness while going into surgery and we had I am ness coming out of surgery. Although "time" (which we are defining as humans' constructed measurement of days/weeks/months did technically pass, the I amness was ever present, now what does this mean? If time is a construction made by humans, then it doesn't belong in truth talks. Therefore, the iam ness has never left me and has always been with me. Just because the earth did one spin while this body was not conscious for it does not mean that I am ness was ever lost. Lower self: I don't understand... Yes it did. The I am ness wasn't there for an entire day. The earth spun and you... Or we... We're not conscious for it. What are you saying? Higher self: I'm talking truth. Time is relative it's NOT absolute and therefore doesn't need to even be considered. I understand where you're coming from as a human being. To you, missing an entire day due to being unconscious is a very big deal, but when we are talking about the ultimate truth, the absolute truth about the entire universe, about reality, we don't have time for talking about anything relative. The truth remains that your I am ness never wavered, you've had it ever since you were born. Understand? Lower self: *Pauses Yes, I understand. We need to trim off the fat, and whatever is leftover is the ultimate truth, I get it. But I did not have I am ness before I was born. How do you explain that? Higher self: How do you know that you didn't? Lower self: I don't really. I don't even know what my first memory is. Higher self: Try. Lower self: I remember when I was in pre school, I got in trouble one time because I got in a fight with this kid, I punched him in the arm. My teacher told me that hitting kids was wrong. I knew it was wrong too at the time, but I had felt like he had treated be unfairly. I'm having a hard time remembering anything prior to this incident. Higher self: Okay, you just came up with a memory, what is a memory? Lower self: A memory is like a VHS tape, I'm able to pick it up and put it into the TV whenever I want. The memory plays on the TV screen, which is my brain, I can watch it once or over and over and over again. Higher self: Okay, so it is a picture that is in your mind. Is there anything true about it? Lower self: Well, no. It's just a picture, and I don't even know how accurate it is, I mean how could I? It happened 26 years ago. Higher self: So the memory is not true? Lower self: No, I guess its not... And I know what you are going to say next, it does not belong in truth work, yeah yeah yeah. Higher self: That's correct, memories do not belong here, throw them away. Lower self: Then how would I know when my I am ness came into being? Higher self: You don't. Lower self: Well if I don't know when my I am ness came into being, then maybe I can assume that it has always been with me. Higher self: Yeah you could assume that, but we're not looking for assumptions here. Trying finding the truth. Lower self: The truth is that I am right now in this current present moment. Anything that happened prior to this moment is NOT truth because it is just a memory from my perspective. Which means that my surgery is not truth, my girlfriend is not truth, me being born is not truth my friends are not truth, the NBA finals is not truth, none of it. None of it is truth except I AM. I am ever present, I always have been and I always will be. Higher self: If anything that happened prior is a memory and is not truth, how can you say that you are ever present and always have been? Lower self: You're right, I can't. Anything that happened in the past is not truth. I need a break from this though, I will talk to you later. Higher self: Okay, good progress today. Let's do a recap in the next session.

Spiritual Autolysis - Journal Entry #59 - Fri June 8th '24 - 7:54 AM Higher self: What is true? Lower self: It is true that "I am" - the I am ness that I experience right now in this body is eternal, it will never go away. I just happen to be experiencing this I AM ness in this current body, but it will be here forever. Higher self: How do you know that? Lower self: To be honest, I don't know it for sure, but it seems to make sense because I am is all that I could possibly know, it is what makes experiencing things possible within this body. I am here, I am typing, I am smelling, I am sitting, I am dancing, this I am ness is here right now and will never leave me. Higher self: Whos to say it won't leave you when your body decays and dies? Maybe its lights out when you die, no more I am ness. Lower self: I suppose its possible, but this I am ness has nothing to do with the body. Higher self: What do you mean? Lower self: The I am ness that I am experiencing, its not because of the body. If I were to chop off my hand, I would still have I am ness. If I were to rewire my brain, switch things up up there, I'd still have I am ness, if I were to take out my heart and replace it with a new one, I'd still have I am ness, if I were to take out my eyeballs, Id still have I am ness. Therefore, the body is not required to have I am ness. Higher self: Wait a minute, what about when you were put under for heart surgery, there was no I am ness then... there was a period in time that you have no conscious memory of, you had no awareness of what was happening for about 24 hours. There was no I am ness then, was there?! Ha! I got you! Lower self: You're right, there wasn't I am ness for that period of time. Higher self: And how do you know that there wasn't I am ness? Lower self: There wasn't I am ness because I was not aware of anything, I wasn't able to experience anything, the I am ness wasn't there at all. From my perspective though, I fell asleep in a hospital bed in one room and then immediately woke up in a hospital bed in another room. Therefore, I actually have no experience of not feeling I am ness, the I am ness from my personal experience did not go away at all, it has always been present. However, there was a period of time in which I was considered unconscious, and from what I can imagine, my body was laying on a hospital bed, they stopped my heart, cut my sternum open, replaced my valve with a cow's valve, and then stitched me back up.. but of course I had no awareness of this happening. Higher self: Okay, now things are getting interesting, lots to unpack here. Lets summarize, so from your personal experience, you actually did not lose I am ness, you experienced I am when you went into the surgery, and you experienced I am when you came out, from your perspective, nothing happened in between. Now here comes the issue of time, the reason that you feel as though the I am ness was gone for a period of time was because time went by and you were not conscious during this time period. Therefore, you feel as though the I am ness was not there. Now answer this, what is time? Lower self: Time... time is a measurement that is used by humans to measure... I'm going to need a second to think about this actually, let me get back to you. Higher self: Okay, no worries. Nice progress here, this is all a mind fuck, I know, but keep working at it, you are getting somewhere.