Orange

Having a baby is selfish because the baby never asked to come on this planet and will suffer as a human identity for a while, maybe for a whole life when it could have just not being born and stayed instead in the" emptiness "before birth. Yes or no? Also, the majority of parents will say that having a baby is a signature of love etc etc. But ultimately, what is the fundamental reason people have a baby? Instinct? Curiosity (ie.I wonder what growing a human in my body feels like or: I wonder how a human develops, let's make one to observe on the spot) ? Culture? Genuine love ( for a human you don't even know yet, love for a non existent object when you think about it) ? What else....selfishness ( ie. When he/ she grows up they can take care of me, emotionally, financialy etc)? For me at least I believe it is ultimately instinct. Nothing else. But I'm curious about your opinions.

Holy shit.

I hear this everywhere as well and it's frustrating. I assume you didn't mean in the approach that I want to take here but your subject made me think about something. Should you never give up on your dream no matter what; if your name is Hitler and your dream is to make the world better by doing eugenics in the world population? *Please read this carefully, it is a controversial subject and it may be misinterpreted. I don't really know how to phrase this well either actually..I'm looking for an answer but Im not sure if i wrote my question correctly ..

@Samuel Garcia I didn't do the life purpose course but maybe this can help you. I think you would have to sit down with the different values you mentioned to feel them in your body so to say. How do you feel when you sit with truth? How do you feel when you sit with love etc. Also you mention the past, but when you 'sit' with the value, it would be better perhaps thay you sit with it without wrapping it up in neediness or logic or whatever. Just take the value of the shelf, sit with it in your lap and notice how you feel in your body..and voila! These things take time, take your time, you can put it back on the shelf and take it off again later

From my experience in real life it is taboo to question someone's choice to have babies. People reply with ' it is love'. And that would be the end of it. Actually now I'm wondering why people react like this..With a bit of irritability and defense. But that is my experience maybe some of you have other experience, with parents being open about questioning why they have a baby? Has anyone asked that question to parents? ' Why did you have a baby'? If yes, how did they react-respond?

I have thought about this in an abstract way but you put it very nicely to words. Thanks.

@Harvey yes that is one side of argument. Although I'm not sure about the "without expecting or getting any benefit" because from the answers I've read so far and the people i talk to, parents and future parents are in fact unconsciously or consciously expecting something in return: unconditional love, future companionship when they will be old etc. Would you still have a kid if you knew he/she would turn out to be completely indifferent to all the care you gave them and would not love you unconditionally, would not stay around when you are old, etc?

@Wormon Blatburm thanks! I'll go check

@username @Kenya From what I understand is that shadow work is only shadow work from the egos perspective. From consciouness' s perspective there is no such thing as 'shadow'. Maybe it's wrong interpretation..I don't know for sure

I thought about enlightement, I don't think I have experienced it but is it the same as letting life live through you? Is it seeing that you are not in control and never were, life is just living through you. You are a bunch of cells grouped in a system that has created an ego in the mind in order to maintain the system's survival. Is it Seeing that the ego creates an illusion which says: I am controlling my actions and making decisions when all everything is is just a result of chain reactions that led to how your life looks like now?

so how can you not be totally oblivious to truth if you cannot define it?

But...what does this have to do with anything? I wasn't asking for Wikipedia ..

I'm in too

@Anna thank you <3 and the first one just came out, like a fresh egg lol

No..Not entirely. I think about it then I think of something else, then it comes again, then goes etc etc etc

Yes. So much

Yes! Please, please give me the hammer! How do you do this? Explain what?

I know..I know this intellectually. But, how do I say? My thoughts always go back to the past. I don't control them. I don't have the control that's what I mean. I feel like I missed out on a part of my life. That's where the resentment is.. I tried to say the same thing you did " I wouldn't miss one day" but I'm lying to myself. The truth is: I would have wanted it otherwise. But it's useless to say this because its not like life then says" OK! Fine, rewind, sorry for the wrong script, let's try this again"

Intellectually I understand it very well. I learn the lesson but in my guts I can't let go of the fact that I wasted time not experiencing life in a positive way, like a normal teenager (going out, relationships, learning etc etc). I cannot be at peace with myself there's always the resentment against myself. Did you manage to move on viscerally or intellectually? Because they are fundamentally different.

Yes I can understand that. In that case it wouldn't be a problem for me either. .But the regret I have is the time spent being depressed, time spent with the wrong people, doing the wrong things etc. I have a terrible time forgiving myself and moving on, I can't do it atm. I want to but I haven't found the technique ..

I'll keep it in mind tonight, thanks popi

Oh yes. I have. But it doesn't prevent them from coming again.

Accept what?

How do I do this specifically? I don't know what That is. Thinking is me yes. As it is everybody else here I suppose. I need to finish my thesis.

Yea...