Basman

@Rishabh R First rule: we don't talk about Actualized. Second rule...

@Ayham If I was you I'd start with what exactly you are getting from these practices concretely in your own experience. The more specific you can be in what it does for you, the better a case you will have for yourself. If these practices turn out to in fact not be doing anything of meaning, then what's the point? Relative to criticism, honestly why do you care? You don't need to deeply analyze a critic in order gauge whether or not it's constructive. Don't overcomplicate things. Have some faith in your own ability to know what is right for you.

Women have a lot more to gain from being more sexually selective than men. Hitting on guys as an attractive women is pick-up on easy mode.

Used to have a cringy obsession with listening to Manson music when I was a teen, so I have some thought about the guy. Relative to personal development, Marilyn Manson very much carries the personality of an artist. I think he is likely quiet self-aware listening to his interviews and podcasts. It is hard to say what he really is like without getting creepy because Marilyn Manson is such a stage persona, divorced from his day-to-day self. I don't feel like he is meant to be taken completely seriously, but more as a commentary and an artistic self-expression in of itself. But he does somewhat betray his age when you look at his works today. especially his older stuff. Manson is very much a product of his time. His misceant and macabre style clearly reflects his dueling with the originally protestant culture that he comes from and that was more prevalent in the 70s and 80s. Playing with the macabre especially juxtaposes what is normally expected and creates a space where a sort of genuineness can be explored. Or just flips things on their head. My favorite album is Pale Emperor.

If I was you, I'd start by making clear and concisely what exactly your hang-ups are and format your text. Reading of what you've written, it sounds like you struggle with: Perfectionism around habits. A sense of meaninglessness. Simplistic, black and white thinking tendencies. It's hard for me to read clearly what exactly you are trying to communicate when you aren't very clear and concise about what exactly you need. But trying anyway (and based on the title), I wonder if you simply lack experience. In my own experience, the sense of going in circles comes from when I try too hard to create results without clearly defining goal as well as actionable steps. Just blindly following a sense of "self-improvement". It's easy to get lost in the sauce. For me, developing my critical thinking skills has been an important part in making me feel less ridicolous as a person. That involves weighing the efficacy of things, truth, biases and the relativity that comes with the complexity of life. It requires an openness to learning and an awareness of ones own tendencies to want to jump to a conclusion. It allows me to better process how I think and more accuratelly assess the information I'm inundated with. I hold a habit of questioning the information and ideas I'm presented with instead of simply believing or not believing. For example with Leo, I take most of his content with a grain of salt and I don't (or atleast try) to not complicity just accept all that he says. This approach makes me an active participant of my world view. This in turn allows me to act in a way that is more integritous to me. I help myself by thinking for myself.

There's no way to avoid feeling bad when things don't go your way, on some level. That's human nature. Feeling rejected is perfectly normal. Best you can do is learn to deal with it. Not take it so personally. You can learn from a rejection, so it's not a purely negative experience necessarily. A lost opportunity can lead to a different path that ends up being right for you. Like a girl you crushed on rejected you but you grew your relationship with the boys as a consequence. Failure can grow you as a person. Even if we could, we shouldn't strive to eliminate everything that feels bad in life. It's an important part of what makes us human.

You definitely should avoid overdoing it. Writing, that is. But it is quiet helpful to process conscious thinking, in my experience.

I don't know how involved you are as a guardian, but perhaps you could speak with the school if you have some legit concerns (parent-teacher meetings, etc). I don't know about teachers neglecting traditional gender roles over neoliberal "build-a-bear" gender constructs. I feel like that is easy to take out of context and blow out of proportion without any evidence. Maybe talk with your sis if you are concerned about how she feels. What her perspective is. Kids doing edgy stuff isn't anything new though. They don't really understand what they are doing, just that it goes a bit against the grain. They understand when they are being edgy by the reactions of their peers and adults. I believe edgyness is stimulating to still developing people because it lets them explore the complexities of life (not just the safe and approved facets). I remember when I was a kid, back in 7th grade (Ca. early 2010s) we had a talent competition at school where the kids would go in groups and arrange a piece to show off to their parents and classmates. I kid you not, the last piece was a bunch of girls just straight up twerking at a 100+ people, most of them parents. That shit's messed up. Kids are weird.

Psychedelics are classed as drugs from a legal standpoint, and as such are illegal. It is hard to pinpoint exactly why psychedelics are classed the way that they are, but it might be worth considering them as a political tools. Psychedelics where widely used by counter-culture movements during the 60s and 70s and associated with various political and social movements, This had lead to certain concerns around the use of psychedelics, including the risk of physchosis and adverse psychological effects as well as them being used for political/social control. It's fair to say that psychedelics can have a radical affect on the way people think, which can be inherently very strange and weird people out. However modern research is showing promise for certain drugs to be used for treating mental health issues. As we see the popularity of legalizing weed grow, the odds of psychedelics being reclassified and made legally accessible is growing with time.

@effortlesslumen I mean, it's not that deep. It's just getting used to using a certain muscular region over the other when you breath.

@Romanov Points raised by a minority don't get dismissed as a "loud minority" always because the merits of a conversation isn't solely dependent on whether or not the interests of a group is a minority or not. If the majority value fairness for example then hearing out minorities could be valuable in of its own right. It depends. The "loud minority" phrase isn't exactly an accurate descriptor. It is just there to help get a sense of the scale of things. Online discourse can be melodramatic and make things seem like the end of the world. So a little perspective helps you see the forest for the trees. It helps you consider the degree to which extreme rethoric is leading a discussion and avoid strawmaning people. It is important to be intellectually honest and consider the biases of both sides.

I suspect the type of people you are talking about is a bit of a loud minority. How many actually do this? Especially online, a few extremists can make the whole bunch seem rotten. The majority generally tends to stay silent with most matters. As to why people get offended for the sake of others, there can be numerous different reasons. Genuineness will vary. An authentic sense of empathy and a of justice. They feel that you are being offensive. Depending on their background and culture, they might have certain expectations for what is normal. It can be difficult to seperate emotion from context sometimes. Context matters. Assuming intent. They think they know how you think and that what you mean is antagonizing (usually unconsciously). Not getting offended might be percieved as making them look bad, I.E. social pressure. Virtue signaling as a way to demonstrate social conscious, gain benefits and control others. Some of these more narcissistic types are fueled when they know that they are highly visible. It's been documented for example that "karens" become even more indignant and imputent when they know they are being filmed. Karens blow up like they do in part because they have a camera in their face. The sensationalism inherent to online discourse likewise drives a degree of short-sighted interactions. Hence why things tend to blow out of proportion online. That is not to say you can't try to protect people without it being some sort of ploy. Getting offended for the sake of others isn't a new thing fundamentally speaking. People have always been defensive about the things they care about. Moral of the story is just not being antagonizing and bridge burning IMO. I personally value understanding, so I don't like to completely disregard other peoples perspective even when you disagree with them.

I'm not experienced with like judging whether or not a country is a good place to live in compared to the rest of the world, but I do have some thoughts. I think it really depends on you and what you value and priotize to a certain extent. How do you want to live your life and is the country you live in right now reasonably conducive to that? Are you OK to a reasonable extent with the cons of the country you live in or the country you want to move to? Perhaps you could use Maslows hierarchy of needs to measure how a country reasonably caters to each level. If it fails an aspect that is important to you, for example self-actualization since a failing economy would make you too busy with scrounging resources to live according to your highest values. In terms of "red-flags", again, I think it depends on you. Every country is going to have some cons regardless, but you're not in immediate danger most likely where you live right now. Its not likely that a war suddenly breaks out like in Ukraine. In that case, you're already gone before you get the chance to even think in terms of "red flags".

@effortlesslumen I believe when I was first practicing it, I would just remember. Bit like meditation where you notice when you are drifitng in thought and return to your breath. Making yourself breath with your diaphraghm when you notice yourself shallow breathing. Daily meditation definitely helped me developing it as a habit since you are working with your breath consciously. It wasn't hard for me to learn the habit as I tend to be just good at remembering certain stuff. I don't know if that's helpful. There might also be a musculature aspect to it. Your body might need a period to adapt and develop muscle control. Nasal breathing is pretty much the ideal for calm deep breathing in my experience. With your tongue resting on the back of your two little buck teeth, jaw somewhat relaxed.

Why don't you ask ChatGPT that exact question?

I believe that in the book "Feel the Fear and Do It Anway" (by Sussan Jeffers), fear is defined as uncertainty about your ability to handle something. It's been a long time since I read that book.

It be silly to give up on your passions just because a machine can do something similar. It's not just about the end product. The process of creation and learning a skill is inherently rewarding for their own sake. The bridges we build when we make meaningful stuff are intrinsic to our happiness. People still paint landscapes even though we have photography. Creation itself is an intimate and important act (hence why you are maybe feeling depressed about all this). If I made a beautiful acrylic painting of your pet, getting you to frame it and everything. That would have more sentimental value and respect than if I just put a bunch of prompts into Midjourney. Or another example, if I made a pair of chopsticks from scratch, painted them and gave them away as a gift. It wouldn't be the same if I just bought them at a store. The process of creation itself adds value to art. The humanity we derive from something created by people. That is something that AI might never reach. Only in the fact that it is an AI, does it speak to us, itself an ingenious human creation. It is when we settle for "good enough" that we tragically lose out on the "heart of art". It's like we no longer really care about art for its own sake. Only for what it can do for us.

@sda Good luck with that. If I could give one advice, that would be to look out for if the first world country you intent to move into accept the credentials of the country you are studying in. First world countries don't always accept degrees from a third world country. I think it might be worth looking into the exact details and how they apply to you.

@sda Wow, good on you. What are you studying? What type of career are you aiming for? In what country do you whish to live in after your education?

My mom managed to quit smoking after being on the stuff for probably over a decade. Been clean for a couple of years. One new years eve I get the bright idea to give everyone cigars as a gag, so we can smoke stogies like in the movies. Now she's back to smoking again thanks to the cigars I gave.

If you are feeling suicidal, consider reaching out to what professional help is available. If you are a student, there should be free counseling available if I'm not mistaken. If you are feeling unworthy, my advice would be to do more things that boost your self-esteem. This could be exercise, cleaning your house, hanging out with healthy friends, working on a project, waking up early, healthy eating, general self-care, etc. You know yourself what makes you feel like a sane person. You need a certain level of non-neediness in order to be attractive to women. If you feel too desperate, it'll make it harder and more serious than it needs to. Dating is socializing with a romantic twist, and socializing shouldn't be so life-and-death. Help yourself first. Ground yourself in your own self-worth.

I think that people assigning autism on you during your formative years has done you a disservice. People really can't help themselves when it comes to missapropiating medical diagnosises. You shouldn't call other people autistic even if you suspect they might be. Remember when "retarded" was an actual medical term. People misused it to such a degree that it had to be binned to escape the shaming connotation. I think "neuro-divergent" is a better term than autism at this point. I'm sorry that people have used it against you. It probably made you ashamed of yourself. If you think you are having issues in terms of function, then consider seeking a diagnosis. If not, then it doesn't really matter if you are neuro-divergent or not. You are just who you are. I'd avoid self-diagnosis, but you can still learn from the autistic science that there is and see how it can help you better meet your unique needs.

@Mormegil @tuku747 Alright, thanks. I'll give it some thought and try around.

I recently discovered that I have a lot of similarities experientially to AvPD. It put a lot of my past life up to now in a completely new light. It has gotten me to think and I've gotten interested in working on my deep-seated self-beliefs. I know that Leo's got something in the works, he said so multiple times. But I can't wait no moh. I got the mill, just need grist. So does anyone have much experience with shadow work? Any tips or video recommendations? I'm a beginner to it.

Professional therapy is expensive because it is an extension of medicine, which has always been costly. To be a fully fledged therapist, you have to undergo many years of training. Not anyone can be a licensed therapist. And there are more people who want to go to therapy than there are therapist. Those are all factors that contribute to the price. There are loads of studies that show that most people who have gone to therapy benefit from it (about 75%). Therapy isn't ineffective. I wonder how you came to that conclusion exactly? It does take time though and you have to find a good therapist that you vibe with to get the most out of it. Therapy isn't a complete solution in of itself however. You have to be interested in wanting to work with yourself and manage your issues. Therapy requires active participation from the patient to be most effective. Sometimes coaching might be more appropiate, depending on what you are looking for exactly. Humans are very complicated.