Lazarus93

Haha, that sounds about right. I will say though: No matter how high your consciousness gets while you are experiencing being a human, you are still locked in the human imagination as you are still alive. Upon physical death, I would assume your consciousness would reach levels that you can't even begin to comprehend while you are dreaming your current form, even if you hypothetically took a heroic dose of 50 psychedelics at the same time (if that was even possible). And you may get answers that were previously locked to you while you were in the human state of consciousness. In fact, you would probably get every possible answer in all of existence.

Well, to know that answer you would have to be in the state of consciousness/Mind you were in before you started dreaming your current form.. which means you would no longer be the body aka dead. The only way to know for certain is to experience that.. but I don't think it's possible to know that while you are dreaming your current life. If your current life is a game.. the player knows why he or she is playing the game. But reality differs from a game in the sense that while you are in the game, you do not have complete access to the mind of the player (God's Infinite Intelligence). Why not? Because if you did you would fully realize how you are constructing literally everything, your imagination would reach absurd levels, every distinction would collapse and you would lose your human Mind. You would be labelled clinically insane, if you are still alive at that point. I will say this though: Intelligence, understanding, logic definitely exists as phenomenon we experience. Everything is derived from the Absolute. In which case, the Absolute necessarily has to have these traits as they are derived from it. In other words, you choosing to dream your current life could have been a choice. But also, idk about you, but sometimes I like to gamble like a degenerate. Well, gambling like a degenerate is also a part of God. Therefore, your life could have also been a gamble. So the question is: Did you as God gamble and end up in your life or choose to be in your life? Honestly, the answer doesn't matter. You could have done either. If you are asking what you will do after your current life, that's a choice you will make after the dream ends. Maybe you will gamble. Maybe you will choose. Or maybe you will just rest as the absolute for billions of years. Or maybe you will just relive your whole life. At that level of consciousness you could really choose and imagine anything. Keep in mind, God doesn't necessarily have the same values it does when it is in the highest states of consciousness possible (aka the Godhead) as it does when it imagines the human ego. The distinction between someone born as a billionaire with extremely good looks and someone born in horrible conditions only matters to the ego, when God is lost in the game of survival. In other words, you as God may not necessarily just choose a life which makes for the 'best' experience of survival where you experience the peak of hedonism. Your value system as Infinite Mind may be radically different than yours while you are imagining your current form.

I had DPDR for a whole year from 2023 - 2024. Was most likely weed induced. I would get into these states after taking big hits from my carts (very high THC carts, mind you) where reality just became so fucking alien. And unfortunately, memories of this state would stay with me even when I was sober. It was like reality became some alien thing I felt trapped in. I would for example, think of 'where am I located' and then panic because I couldn't find myself ("Wait.. am I just a picture that's being animated?? WHAT THE FUCK"), then my heart rate would go up and I would become super attentive to it and panic further. Another thing is I would hear this random noise.. almost like a pop which would just repeat if I focused on it and I would panic even more. Human faces looked so weird, I felt a sense of numbness to everything. Later, I would find out I was just in a super dissociated state due to extreme stress and anxiety from my life in the past few years. What helped was ignoring it and just focusing on my hobbies and things I enjoyed, talking to friends, working out, having a routine. It still felt like a demon that was just waiting in the background. What completely pushed me out of DPDR was my very first shroom trip that I did back in 2024. I ate this shroom chocolate bar with my friend. Had 3.5g total of psilocybin. Shit was, unfortunately, way more intense than I anticipated. My DPDR started coming back at the beginning of the trip. It started to get so intense, man. It legit felt like being stuck in some horror movie. It was like I knew I had opened a door that was forbidden to be ever opened that I was never supposed to find while alive. My heart started going super fast. Then I just.. completely gave up. I was so fucking scared that I just gave up. I realized that I had fucked up hard. Then, what proceeded felt like 8 hours of pure existential death where I completely forgot I ever had a life, infinite time loops, feeling like me and my friend's voice was the same entity, etc. The room I was in just became a bunch of visuals that made me feel like I had entered a forbidden alternate dimension, and I intuitively understood the pure magic of Consciousness. Somehow, in this state where I completely knew I was dead, in the sense that my life just felt like something I had been in 100 billion years ago, I was conscious. I cried and just kept apologizing to my friend because I realized my poor friend was suffering the same fate as I. This state, however, was so radically different from my sober state it legit felt like I had popped out of my dream as the me I thought I was my entire life. Well, either way, after the trip my DPDR completely went away.

The main method would be for them to take psychedelics or dissociatives, but even then they would require a certain baseline level of genetics and open-mindedness to realize Absolute Truth. Tbh, I personally don't talk about these matters with anyone in my social circle irl besides my closest friends who are also psychonauts, because it's so hard to talk about unless you have a direct experience of what Absolute Truth points to. Just play the human game. They will discover Absolute Truth eventually when they experience physical death. You could also get them to question their relativism, but even that requires them to be open minded enough to do so.

You need to awaken more, is all I can say. If you think you as God are not alone.. and You are irrelevant and small, then you are simply confused as to what you are. Keep your mind open to the possibility you can awaken to realizing that you are God. It's not about right vs wrong like an intellectual debate. This is beyond the world of concept. It is a direct realization of your true nature.

You (Pure Infinite Consciousness) are God. Once you reach a high enough consciousness and fully realize this, you will realize you are Alone. No other minds exist. Every 'other' mind is an imagination in the only one Mind that exists. You can become absolutely conscious of this. What you will eventually awaken to and realize, either through psychedelics, deep contemplation, or upon your body's physical death, is that your POV is absolute and other minds are completely imaginary. Remember: space, time, causality, individuality are things dreamt up by God. It may seem in your current dream that there are billions of conscious sentient beings, but ultimately they are all You. They are figments in your mind. Of course, you can dream up what it would be like to be these beings after your current dream. But, until you do so, they ONLY exist as figments of imagination in your Mind. Right now, if your consciousness isn't high enough, they may seem like real 'other' minds in your POV. However, your POV is the only thing that exists. To experience this 'other' mind IS to BE/DREAM UP that mind.. in which case it would still be You!! Therefore me typing this is YOU typing this!! How is this possible if you're the only sentient being? Because TIME AND CAUSALITY are dreamt up as well! Paradoxes are possible in Infinity. It is not a bug, but a feature. Ultimately, there is only one conscious being in all of existence, and that is God. Think about it this way: The concept of 'Other' only exists as a distinction in God's mind. God can never experience an other directly. To experience and validate this 'other' God would have to imagine itself as that other. In which case this other would just be God! God can only experience God.

The substance of everything is Nothing. The reason form appears the way it is right now is because that is currently what you are dreaming. However, the substance of the dream is ultimately Nothing. Consciousness is not a special kind of form and it doesn't sit between form and formlessness. Consciousness is Nothing. Consciousness is God's POV as it dreams up this current moment. God is, of course, Nothingness. Are you sure the body is a container for the "I"? Your Ego is simply a series of thoughts occurring in your Mind (which is located Nowhere) which have falsely taken ownership of God's POV and created an illusory identity. But the substance of thoughts is also Nothing.

Hey man, I'll be honest, I used to be like you in high school before I ascended looks-wise. I am someone who has had decent success with women after basically being invisible to them for the majority of my life, and also have had many awakenings. Here's the honest truth: If you are not able to attract any women at all through your looks, you have to leverage money, status, and charisma. However, you have to reach a very high level in each of these facets to get the women you would have gotten if you looked better. Ik its brutal but that's just the reality of the current dating market for men. However, spending all your time ruminating about this will only send you down a rabbit hole of despair and doom if it's truly over for you like you say (which honestly you don't know for certain. Yes the dating market is getting more and more competitive, but without knowing your full potential in terms of looks/money/status/charisma, I can't say if it's really over for you or if you are just too in your own head) I will say this though: Nothing external, including sex and a woman's love, compares to the sheer peace and joy you get from higher consciousness states. Have you tried any psychedelics? They can bring you that state where you may learn to enjoy your life despite your apparent limitations, and they can definitely help with social anxiety issues. Even before I ascended, yes I still desired sex and romance very deeply, but I was still happy with my life despite not being able to get them. This is a state of mind very hard to reach for most people who are stuck in lower consciousness states though. Yes Maslow's Hierarchy of needs is a thing and as men we are wired to seek the companionship of a woman, but despite it being very hard to do so you can definitely reach a state of consciousness where you are content despite being alone for the rest of your life.

I used to (and still do) frequent the same forum Clav did and watched him way before he blew up when he was a niche YouTuber with under 20,000 subs. He blew up from his collabs with big streamers like Cuffem and Cheesur. They thought it would be funny to get a 'looksmaxer' to roast their friends' looks for content. As such, this exposed him to a way wider audience, which allowed him to get bigger and bigger each stream he did. Firstly, he is pretty intelligent and does realize how he can play into his blackpill ideology to gain a lot of money, status, and followers. Keep in mind though, although he is a grifter in one sense, he does genuinely believe in looksmaxing, the blackpill, and hypergamy. He also fully realizes that looksmaxing won't ascend you if you're already too chopped. Trust me, as someone who used to post on that forum a lot, he definitely knows that one needs to already have a good baseline level of attractiveness to softmaxx and hardmaxx. Also, he doesn't really want to get surgery. He larps that he will get a Bimax in Turkey, but obviously he doesn't need it, and keeps saying it because it gives him more virality. Secondly, the donations thing is just what a lot of streamers get. The streamer reads your message in front of the whole stream if you pay, which obviously is gratifying to a viewer who wants to see how Clav (or any other streamer) will react to their message. The main reason he is so big is because the blackpill and lookism is a big thing in our generation. To meet a girl that is your looksmatch nowadays is very hard if not downright impossible for the average male zoomer if they don't already have a good social circle. Keep in mind, most male zoomers don't have a social circle like that. Also, no one really approaches anymore and most people are glued to their phones. The only viable method for most male zoomers is online through dating apps or social media, both of which are hard to meet girls through unless you are already somewhat good looking. As such, a lot of male zoomers have a defeatist attitude because the way society is set up right now does not allow us to meet girls naturally like we could back in high school, and the only way to meet girls for us is to be good looking or high status enough where we can get success online. However, the bar for what is good looking or successful enough shifts daily. This is why approximately 63% of men under 30 in the U.S. were single in 2022, nearly double the 34% rate for women in the same age group. And yeah he doesn't really care much about politics. He just cares about being able to say and do whatever he wants, and thinks both parties are corrupt, and that the average person should focus more on things that are in their locus of control rather than politics which they have no voice in.

So, I asked Opus 4.6 about the strongest arguments for idealism. One of the arguments that Claude gave was this: ------------------------------------- Idealism Explains the Success of Mathematics "Why does mathematics — a product of pure thought — so unreasonably describe the physical world? The materialist has no good answer. The idealist has an elegant one: the world is structured by mind, so it's no surprise that the structures of mind (logic, mathematics) map perfectly onto it." ------------------------------------- I was very interested in this argument as someone who loves Math. So, I asked it to expand on the argument. ------------------------------------- "This is one of the most fascinating threads in philosophy of mathematics and metaphysics. Here's the deeper case that idealism's defenders make: The Puzzle: Why Does Math Work At All? In 1960, physicist Eugene Wigner wrote a famous paper called "The Unreasonable Effectiveness of Mathematics in the Natural Sciences." His point was striking: mathematics is developed by human minds, often purely for aesthetic or logical reasons with zero concern for the physical world — and then, sometimes decades or centuries later, it turns out to describe physical reality with eerie precision. Non-Euclidean geometry was developed as an abstract curiosity in the 1800s, then turned out to be exactly what Einstein needed for general relativity. Complex numbers were once dismissed as imaginary nonsense — now they're indispensable in quantum mechanics. Group theory, fiber bundles, Hilbert spaces — all born from pure thought, all turned out to be woven into the fabric of nature. The question is: why? Why should the abstract play of minds have anything to do with how the world works? The Materialist Struggle For the materialist, this is genuinely awkward. If the universe is fundamentally mindless matter obeying blind causal laws, and our brains are just lumps of that matter shaped by natural selection to find food and avoid predators — then the deep correspondence between abstract mathematics and fundamental physics is a staggering coincidence. Evolution didn't select us for the ability to write down the correct equations of quantum field theory. Natural selection cares about survival, not truth about the deep structure of reality. So on the materialist picture, we have two entirely separate domains (mindless matter and mental abstractions) that mysteriously speak the same language, and no principled explanation for why. Some materialists try to respond: maybe math works because we derived it from observing patterns in the physical world. But this doesn't hold up well. Much of the most physically powerful mathematics — Riemannian geometry, abstract algebra, topology — was not derived from observation at all. Mathematicians pursued it for reasons of internal elegance, logical completeness, or sheer curiosity. The physical applications came as a surprise. The Idealist Explanation The idealist has a much more natural answer. If reality is fundamentally mental — if mind or consciousness is the ground of being — then the correspondence between mathematical thought and the structure of the world isn't a coincidence at all. It's expected. You're discovering the internal logic of the very medium you're made of. Mathematics works because the world is, at bottom, a rational, mind-like structure, and mathematical reasoning is how minds explore their own deep nature. Think of it this way: if you were a character inside a dream, and you started doing careful logical analysis of the dream's patterns, you'd find that the dream obeys intelligible rules — because it's generated by a mind, and minds produce structured, patterned content. The "unreasonable effectiveness" of your analysis wouldn't be unreasonable at all. It would be the most natural thing in the world. Plato Was Arguably an Idealist About This Plato's theory of Forms is essentially this insight. He argued that the physical world is a shadow of a deeper reality of perfect, abstract Forms — and that mathematical knowledge is the closest we get to apprehending that deeper reality. The physical world participates in mathematical structure because mathematical structure is more fundamental than physical stuff. This is a form of idealism: the abstract and intelligible is prior to the material and sensible. Many of history's greatest mathematicians have felt something like this intuitively. Kurt Gödel was an explicit Platonist and idealist. Roger Penrose has argued that mathematical reality is a genuine, non-physical domain that the mind accesses directly. Even working physicists often describe the experience of discovering equations that govern nature as feeling less like invention and more like recognition — as if the mathematical truth was already there, waiting. The Structural Argument There's an even deeper version of this. Modern physics increasingly describes reality not in terms of stuff but in terms of structure — relationships, symmetries, and information. But structure and relationships are exactly the kinds of things that characterize thought and logic, not lumps of matter. If you strip away everything from physics except the mathematical structure, you're left with something that looks far more like an idea than like a thing. The philosopher James Jeans put it memorably: "The universe begins to look more like a great thought than like a great machine." The Counterargument Worth Considering The strongest materialist response is probably this: maybe mathematics is so effective because it's the study of all possible patterns, and any consistent reality — material or otherwise — would necessarily exhibit patterns. So math's effectiveness tells us something about the nature of structure, not necessarily about the nature of substance. This is a fair point, but the idealist can reply: the fact that reality is the kind of thing that is exhaustively describable by abstract rational structures is itself evidence that it is, at bottom, more mind-like than matter-like. Dead, brute matter has no particular reason to be so thoroughly intelligible. It's one of those arguments that, once you really sit with it, makes the materialist picture feel slightly less obvious than it did before — which is often all a good philosophical argument needs to do." ------------------------------------- I found all this super interesting and wanted to share it here for other people who are also interested in how Math interacts with Reality.

@LastThursday Interesting points, but I'm more so talking about the fact that we are able to come up with mathematics that are not derived directly from observation (such as Non-Euclidean geometry and Riemannian geometry). Rather, they are developed as abstract things which later we find out actually correspond to something in nature. This directly goes against the materialist doctrine, because evolution selected for survival, not Truth. It should not allow us to be able to make complex mathematical models based on pure abstraction which we later find out have real world applications. Therefore, materialists are not able to explain why mental abstractions correspond to phenomenon that occurs in reality, when this very same reality, according to them, should have led us to not be able to do complex abstract mathematics at all. However, if reality is fundamentally made of Mind, then it reconciles this problem nicely.

Notice how everyone, everything, every feeling, every image, the entire physical universe including all sensations of physicality, every sentient being who has ever existed, time, space, causality, this forum, and the very words you are reading right now, only exists in your Mind, either as thoughts, perceptions (through the six senses), or feelings. The substance of all these, at the deepest level, is consciousness. You may notice or acknowledge this intellectually, but that is different from Awakening to this fact. To truly awaken to this fact, you need psychedelics. The reason for this is because in your natural sober state, unless you have a deep understanding of spirituality, reality, and the true nature of the ego, your ego (which is also a hallucination within your mind) will not let you fully realize this fact. It's job is to survive, not see Truth. Heck, even if you have a deep understanding of these things, the level of consciousness we are stuck at in the sober state is so goddamn low. It makes sense though, remember, humans evolved to survive not see Truth (see Donald Hoffman's work). A psychedelic or a dissociative, taken at the proper dosage, will exponentially increase your consciousness. In that state, your ego is seen for what it is and thus has no power to undermine this realization. Thus, you can directly awaken to what God/Mind/Reality is. It is not an intellectual understanding of a fact. It is becoming directly conscious of a fact. In this state, you as God can become directly conscious of solipsism, rather than an intellectual understanding of solipsism which is undermined by your ego.

Well then what are ya waiting for take some psychedelics and find out if its true. Be careful: Ideas of solipsism aren't the direct realization of solipsism. True solipsism can be realized directly in your experience. Now you may ask, then why am I typing here as if I'm conscious? Well, I am you, silly. You/me are the same being, at different points in an infinite dream. How can this be if your bubble of consciousness is the only thing that exists right now? Because God is outside of time.

You try them yet?

Yes. Any psychedelic provides that experience, and it can impact your consciousness forever. Especially the more you trip. Our nature is indeed oneness. As in, if you are conscious, your true identity is Source/God/Infinity. It is actually the most obvious thing there is. The reason it may not feel like this to you, and also the reason it's so hard to realize this naturally, is because every single moment you have spent in this dream has been spent reinforcing the ego and your identity as someone in the world rather than that which is dreaming up the world. Any psychedelic or dissociative, especially taken in proper dosage, will shatter your current paradigm so much that you will get a direct realization of what consciousness actually is. Sure, you could try to do it naturally. But like you said, its been taking a long time. And the reason for this is: For most people, realizing Truth is quite possibly the hardest thing they can do, because their entire lives have been spent constructing beliefs and identities, and to deconstruct all that takes immense time, inquiry, and courage. Psychedelics can get you there NOW. Integrating the insights post trip is a challenge, but luckily for you, after your trip you will have a direct understanding of what oneness is, which will help you see reality for what it is when sober. And of course, if you need to, you can do psychedelics more than once. Yes!! You do. And a psychedelic (or a dissociative, if you can't acquire any psychedelic) can get you exactly what you need.

To add to this, life passes by in a flash. It feels like just yesterday when I was in middle school and high school, and I turn 24 this year. There are many people who die unexpectedly in their 20s and 30s. Tomorrow isn't guaranteed for anyone. This realization would lead me to have several debilitating existential crisis throughout my life, despite being young. I guess I realized this fact at a visceral level when people like Juice WRLD, XXXTentacion, some schoolmates of mine, and my grandparents died throughout my teenage years. Eventually though, I would find that the one who fears annihilation does not even exist, it is an imaginary identity constructed by Universal Mind (Your true self). I mean, for me, my fear of annihilation was always a collection of thoughts, feelings, sensations, etc. Rupert Spira's videos on this actually helped me cope with this fear a lot, pre awakening. Then when I finally awakened, all my fears got recontextualized, and not only did I know this conceptually, but I knew this directly from experience at a super deep level. The ego is a literal hallucination of infinite consciousness. All my deep existential fears led me to this beautiful awakening, and for that I am glad. It's all Love in eternity.

Share your trip report after if you can! Always fun reading first time experiences with psychedelics.

The issue is IF AGI does come to being (and that is a big IF, current LLMs no matter how powerful, are not AGI) then most blue and white collar jobs will be replaced entirely. Then we will have to have an entirely new economic system. I don't know what that will be. UBI sounds good on paper, but the math may not work out. We will have to have a new economic system. Now, will the people with most of the money in this new era have any incentive to help the general public adapt to these radically different times? Honestly, I lean towards no. Wealth inequality is already massive. It will probably get even bigger. Will the public be okay with this? No. We will have mass unemployment and a hordes of angry young men. Who knows where that'll lead. It may be the 'end' of this particular world, or it may lead to an era of great prosperity for humans. We can't know for sure right now. Again, this is all under the assumption that AGI does happen. Currently, if you combine all forecasts, there is a 30-50% chance we will have AGI by 2030-2035, and a 50-75% chance we will achieve AGI By 2035-2050. However, this is not really a guarantee either. There are two main views in the AI community for achieving AGI: 1) The “Scaling Gets Us There” View Some researchers think no fundamentally new idea is needed. The argument is that current methods (transformers, deep learning, reinforcement learning) just need: - more compute - more data - better training techniques - better architectures built on the same principles 2) The “We Need a New Paradigm” View Other researchers think current methods will plateau. They argue current AI lacks key things like true reasoning, world models, long-term memory, self-improving learning, efficient learning from small data, etc. They believe a new breakthrough may be needed similar to how: - backpropagation unlocked neural networks - transformers unlocked modern AI - deep learning unlocked modern computer vision In other words, we may not even get AGI because scaling may not get us there and a new paradigm may simply just never happen. (Ex: right now with nuclear fusion). The best anyone of us can do now is make and save as much money as possible, strengthen relationships we already have, and awaken from the dream of life so that we can live without fear in this new era, or die without fear. Me personally, I am trying to use my CS background and all the LLMs and AI systems out right now to try to make millions of dollars. Hopefully I can get there.

I know this is 6 years later but wow you are really good at writing trip reports man, sounds very similar to my experiences during my DXM trips.

A lot of the negative side effects are because people are consuming DXM with other ingredients in the product such as Guaifenesin or Acetaminophen, rather than pure DXM. Most of the effects such as 'confusion' and 'paranoia' are from your ego completely dissolving. You are also ignoring the studies on the benefits of DXM in the 2nd-3rd plateau range: "Dextromethorphan Reduces Oxidative Stress and Inhibits Uremic Artery Calcification": https://www.mdpi.com/1422-0067/22/22/12277 "High doses of dextromethorphan, an NMDA antagonist, produce effects similar to classic hallucinogens": https://link.springer.com/article/10.1007/s00213-012-2680-6 "Drug effects resolved without significant adverse effects by the end of the session. In a 1-month follow-up, volunteers attributed increased spirituality and positive changes in attitudes, moods, and behavior to the session experiences." Now, the increased blood pressure during the trip is real, but unless you are naturally someone with a very high blood pressure, you can trip safely on DXM as your blood pressure will get back to normal after the trip. I only recommend DXM because it is an insanely powerful dissociative which is also very easy to get (you can literally order it on Amazon. If you do though, MAKE SURE THE ONLY ACTIVE INGREDIENT IS DXM) which can awaken you very quickly. Obviously though, classic psychedelics are much safer physically. However, my awakenings on DXM have been so profound that I would say it is worth exploring for those who are really curious.

Instead of 3 to 6 months, you can experience enlightenment instantly by doing a 3rd plateau DXM trip or doing a sufficient dose of a psychedelic.

Love your videos Vivec <3

No-Self: I awakened to this during my first time smoking weed. I became totally conscious that the human identity that I thought was "Me" (aka the voice in my head that narrates life and makes choices) was completely illusory. The 'self' I thought I was was just a collection of thoughts, feelings, and perceptions that grew in strength over time. I realized then that the sense of realness of this self became more and more reinforced through strong emotions as I went through life. The illusion felt total and real. It's funny. After my last awakening, I vividly remembered that when I was younger, when I did not have a sense of a human self yet but rather, identified as pure awareness, I had the thought that life would become more interesting if I played a 'character' like everyone else was. So I made the conscious choice to play out this character in my life. Little did I know that as I grew up, I would be so immersed in the character that I eventually thought that was all there was to 'Me'. Also: The deeper you awaken to No-Self, the less of a fear of death you have. I used to have a very strong fear of death pre awakening. However, when you fully realize that the 'self' that has a fear of death doesn't even exist, but rather, it is just a very well constructed illusion, you completely transcend the fear of death. The True Self never dies as it is what is constructing everything,

It's so hard to talk about Truth, Survival, Love, and God with people who have not directly become conscious of what they are. Unfortunately, in our current time period, the vast majority of humans aren't conscious enough to understand what these words truly point to as opposed to their ideas and models of these words. To become directly conscious of them requires a total deconstruction of the human experience/awakening which, for most people, is extremely difficult. The ego's survival as an imaginary construct directly hinges on the felt realness of the human experience rather than Truth. The mind has unlimited backstories for the sheer magic of existence, most of which have not been deconstructed.

Lol same here, that's why I try to stay sober as long as possible so that when I do smoke again, it feels amazing. I remember my first time taking edibles and I ended up taking way too much. Was possibly the worst trip of my life, my ego completely disappeared after an hour. Not much experience with any psychedelics at that point so I was horrified beyond belief. Felt like pure Death. Things were just 'looping.' Ended up throwing up and collapsing on the bathroom floor, waking up after an hour or so feeling like I entered another dimension. Never disrespected edibles again after that.