Lila9

Men who want to emotionally connect with women, just put the effort to do that. People can emotionally connect in multiple ways. Sex is not the only way. Men can sleep years with their wives, never feel emotionally connected to them. They can feel more emotionally connected to their male friends than their wives.

@Deziree I wish that mental health issues were taken more seriously. @Never_give_up I am very sorry for your horrible experience, no one deserves it. I can sense that it made you stronger. @Nemo28 I am so sorry for the loss of your brother to suicide. The pain must be intolerable. @MarkKol Yes, I think that people who commited suicide, experienced severe emotional pain, so strong that the only possible option to escape it appeared to be death. But it is probably more complex than that and depends on the personality.

I woke up in the middle of the night to horrible screams and cries of a woman. I looked out from the window, I thought something happened in the building in front of mine (there is always something happening there). It turns out it wasn’t in the other building, but closer. Too close. I saw what appeared to be the crushed body of a young man under my window, his mother beside him sobbing and asking him why he did that. His father was screaming to the sky in despair. I called an ambulance with the hope that he was still alive and could be saved. The ambulance came quickly, and the paramedics tried their best for 20–30 minutes to bring him back to life, but unfortunately, he was dead. Later, I found out that it was my teen neighbor who had committed suicide by jumping from a high floor, his parents’ home, a few floors above mine. He was bullied harshly at school, and the pain apparently was so unbearable. He didn’t have to do that, I thought. He was a beautiful and smart boy, but from the limited perspective of an adolescent, he didn’t realize that although his circumstances seemed to suck right now, this was not permanent and that he had a long life to live in which he would also experience good things. His death, and the brutal and painful way he died, traumatized so many people around him. His nuclear family, the extended family, the neighbors, his classmates (the few who were his friends), many people are grieving. So many people loved him. But it was too late. After that, I was afraid to sleep with the window open or look out of the window. I was afraid to go outside when it was dark. I was afraid of random daily things that reminded me of the tragedy. I was hypervigilant. I had dreams of the tragedy or related themes. In one dream, I was in his position, on the ground, looking from below at the window from which he jumped and feeling his parents’ love. Since the day he committed suicide, his parents, especially his mother, were screaming in cries, from the window, every early morning, desperately calling their son’s name, even after his funeral. The screams were so painful to hear, so piercing. It is so painful to witness grieving people, especially parents who lost their child to suicide. At some point, they stopped screaming in grief from the window and just grieved silently at home. His father started to drink. His mother lost so much weight she almost disappeared. I had hallucinations of them crying later. I had hallucinations of hearing someone’s body hitting the ground after jumping from a high floor. I couldn’t stop thinking about his dead body, with the broken limbs, how such death can happen to such young and living person. Gradually the obsessive thoughts and hallucinations decreased, and I could function more easily. It’s still saddens me so much that he took his life. I saw him around two weeks before he died, he was with a friend (who, as I found out later was toxic to him) and he looked to me like a normal, even popular boy. Though when I noticed his eyes, they appeared empty or sad, I couldn’t articulate it, it was just a feeling. I thought that I may be over-feeling. My dogs barked at them, so I moved quickly in order not to scare them, I didn’t have time to converse with them and see what was happening between them, which I regret. This is my survivor’s guilt talking, deluding me into thinking that I had control over the situation. But maybe if his parents, who knew about the bullying, couldn’t stop him, what could I do? If that wasn’t enough, I felt another guilt inside me, another type of guilt, which is the guilt of slightly understanding him. Because it is not socially acceptable to understand people who commit suicide. We’re supposed to never want it, right? And I really don’t want it. I will never do that. But it made me think about how fucked up society is, like, really fucked up and how vulnerable children are to all of this crap. I read that there has been an increase of 60% in child/teen suicide in recent years. This is crazy, because children are not supposed to die in such horrible ways. It also seems like there is not much talk or awareness about it, as if someone is trying to shift the focus away to keep the social dysfunction that leads to it because it benefits them. But we, the adults who live in this society, are responsible as well, we actively create it. Adults bully each other at workplaces, adults are emotionally absent or immature within their family and friendships units, mostly in ways which are normalized snd socially acceptable. And all this narcissistic cult of individualism, that hurts our lives and the lives of our children but we never question it. And it’s bad because it makes the life so much unbearable, unnecessarily unbearable and more difficult than it should be. Especially for the most vulnerable people in society in their most vulnerable stages of their lives. Me and another neighbor would like to plant a tree in the spot where the boy fell, for his memory and with the intention to inspire people to be better, kinder, more tolerant the loving to each other. Though I personally feel a little bit hopeless about society and humanity right now.

Sexual needs can be easily satisfied with masturbation or be channelled to other things, you don't really have to sleep with women to satisfy it. When you talk about men being denied sex it only shows that you see women as machines who are obligated to give men sex. Naturally, a man who cannot attract women to sleep with him will not procreate. That's nature. It is brutal but this is how it is. Men who didn't put the effort to attract women, died virgins. And there is nothing new about it. There is no one to blame. You may sleep with a woman who you are not attracted to but you will never be willingly in a relationship with her and you will never see her as a human. Many men tend to actively disrespect and bully women who they don't find attractive rather than simply leaving them alone. Which is worse than being "denied" sex from the random woman you find attractive and feel entitled too. This is a problem. If men view sex and women this way, why would women want to sleep with them? It only makes women more picky. But then you delude yourself that women are pickier because some stupid reasons. You never want to look at the root issue and work on it. You never dare to de construct the patriarchy and question it deeply. No, no. You just whine and complain and keep following the same people who benefit from it, like Elon. You get fucked by such people in the ass every day, ignorant for your entire life that they perpetuate the system which hurts you. But you will ever blame women. For everything. Do you think people like Elon give a shit about you? Come on.

This actually happened a lot in the Oct. 7 attack by Hamas. Arabs saved Jews, Jews saved Arabs. Arab and Jews died to save lives of each-other. This is rarely talked about outside of Israel. People often talk about Jews protecting Arabs, i.e, Jews trying to protect Arabs in the WB from violent settlers, but the opposite happens too.

I am sorry you went through this. It sounds like a nightmare, as if someone hacked your brain and you lost control over it. I would assume it’s a sign of schizophrenia (which is still a very mysterious phenomenon), but since you are no longer experiencing it, that may not be the case. Still, your experience is pretty frightening and mysterious. My father is diagnosed with schizophrenia (since age 25), and it has basically been his life since then. Entities talking to him, commenting on everything, no escape, even with medication, which only makes it more controllable. Sometimes the entities say positive things, sometimes negative. Recently, when I talked to him, he said he heard a voice saying I would be on TV, which was nice and even flattering, haha, though it made me wonder for what reasons the voice said I would be there lol, hopefully for a good reason.. But there are also voices that made him believe I said negative things to him and hated him (which is not true), and he was hurt and confronted me about it, until I reminded him that those are just his voices and not reality. He is very aware that there is a separation between what the voices tell him and reality, but sometimes they mess with his mind so much that he forgets it, and it takes a while to realize it, just as it takes time to realize we were only dreaming after we wake up.

I am glad that there is Teal, it is pleasant to encounter a spiritual leader who is not a man. As a young woman on a spiritual path, looking at someone like Teal gives me an idea of what I could be and what I could strive for. It gives me hope. I see myself a lot in her, she feels like a more polished version of me. My impression of her is that she is a prophet, a truth-teller, a woman who has a divine role that she has accepted and owns. She is very confident in this position. I also sense a prophetic presence in myself, but like many women with this gift, I accept it reluctantly. I see it more as a burden, something that attracts negativity toward me and puts me in risk, which I can’t emotionally handle, yet I also can’t help it and can’t be someone I am not. On the other hand, like many people, Teal confuses me because of some people’s claims about her narcissistic behavior. I don’t know whether people say this because they envy her and feel threatened by a woman in power (a very intelligent and attractive woman, which may be intolerable for many people in our close-minded patriarchal society, in comparison to a man with the same gifts), or because they are genuinely trying to expose her true nature. This is very crucial, because vulnerable people in vulnerable states are drawn to her and if she is a narcissist, they can be easy targets for exploitation. I don’t know if it will ever be clear to me. But it doesn’t interfere with my enjoyment of her content or my appreciation of the value she brings to people, at least for now. Like with any spiritual leader, it is always important to be conscious, not to give our power to any authority, to think for ourselves, to be exposed to various teachings etc.

I am not built for modern life to a very large extent. It is responsible for the majority of my mental health issues. I am worried about children, animals, the elderly, people with disabilities, autistic and highly sensitive people trying to survive in this environment.

I believe that humans are very spiritual, kind, curious, creative, empathic, playful and gentle at their core. But humans are also very flexible and opportunistic, they can be shaped by whatever their current environment is. If the environment values money, status, hierarchy, dominance, and narcissistic behavior, which has been the case for the last hundred years, then people will unconsciously adapt to it in order to survive. But they will be miserable, because these values are not optimal for human happiness or for a happy and fulfilled society, but only for a few individuals who “win” in this system but those are miserable as well because they don’t live in alignment with human nature. I believe that those among us who don’t accept society’s values can cope with this by opting out of it psychologically (not believing in the matrix, being aware of its artificiality and illusion, lies and doctrine, the cult of capitalism, patriarchy, materialism and rationalism, deconstructing it), and by creating our own little psychological safe space in which we can cultivate kindness, love, curiosity, open-mindedness, creativity, play, connection to the divine, truth, and integrity, and look for people who are drawn to our values and share them.

In the days around my period, especially during the 10 days before it begins due to the hormonal changes that make the psyche so chaotic, these are the days when I sometimes can’t recognize myself. I feel like some wild and dangerous animal cosplaying as a civilized woman, trying not to get caught. I try to isolate myself from people as much as possible in those days.

What makes me sad about people, especially in our “non-conformity is cool” era, is that everyone says they are nonconformists, that they are independent thinkers, open-minded, and original, but when they meet people who truly have different opinions from theirs, people who express original ideas or propose alternative views on life or existence, they bully the shit out of them. What I have learned, unfortunately, is that most people want to be praised for being nonconformists without really carrying the real burden of nonconformity, which mostly includes tons of loneliness and misunderstanding. I also don’t think that humans can fully escape conformity. We can be highly aware of it, of course, but the thing in our brain that makes us conformists is literally biological. We can observe this in ourselves and others with compassion and try to make the most conscious and best choice in the moment. There are advantages to conformity too, and it is not a sin to conform in some cases, as long as it comes from a place of awareness and not ignorance and the conformist action is not evil.

@Salvious I totally agree. @Ishanga I am so sorry for this tragic loss in your family. I feel proud for your sister as well.

@Judy2 and @Ulax Thank you so much for your kind and thoughtful words. It means a lot to me.

I think that after thousands of years of patriarchy, after a systemic war against femininity that cannot be denied and hasn’t ended yet, it is very reasonable that men would receive a backlash. It is sad, but I am not surprised. Yes, patriarchy is not men, but it is a system created by men for benefiting men, and men for thousands of years enjoyed the privilege it gave them (though it also hurts them in ways most of them are ignorant to) at the expense of women and children. They did nothing to change it, and still don’t do, and don’t care much beyond their survival and selfish interests. I also don’t think that misandry is something common or as common as misogyny. Yes, women are angry, yes, women are hurt, yes, women tend to avoid men more and focus more on putting themselves first before relationships with men, but this is not because of inherently hating masculinity. I don’t think that men really know what true gender-based hatred is, what systemic hatred is, to the degree of spiritual, emotional, and sexual abuse and murder by the other gender, simply for being born female. I think that men complaining about misandry just because women don’t want to play with their dick anymore (for valid reasons), is so insulting to the true recipients of gender-based violence and hatred. I don’t say it to be an asshole, I say it to put things in perspective. I also would say that honestly, from the depth of my heart, that women actually crave healthy, kind, and strong masculine energy. Even the most radical feminists, the 4B girls, and even lesbians (in some platonic ways) crave that and admire that. I, as the radical feminist I am, admire the healthy type of masculinity, the one that will never try to manipulate me, exploit me, talk down to me, or dehumanize me, the one that will see and value my femininity and ensure that I am emotionally and physically safe around him. But, to be honest, how many men are like that? Realistically speaking, not many, because of the effort it takes to become this sort of man, and also because most men in the last thousands of years of patriarchy didn’t have to embody these healthy masculine traits to survive in the system. The bare minimum was enough, and even, as we came closer to modernity, it is actually the bad guys, the most horrible and sociopathic men who get the rewards, who become billionaires, and the other men just try to imitate them. And women are groomed from a young age to try to appeal to those men, even if they actually don’t really like them. How screwed up is that, isn’t it? Another note about the hierarchical thing: I, as a feminist (which is a Goddess fragment of consciousness who believes that women are as much human beings as men, yes, different in some ways, but should be equal in the love they both receive from the system, like two siblings who are different but deserve love from their parents regardless of their uniqueness), believe in natural hierarchy, and I don’t think that most women or feminists are complaining about that. I think that the complaint is about the artificial hierarchy, like people who have power and authority because they decided by some arbitrary rules that they are competent for it, without actually deserving it or having the required skills to handle it with responsibility and integrity. I actually, and I speak very honestly here, believe that most men have issues with natural hierarchy when it comes to women. I.e., a woman may be a great natural leader, but a non-competent man will be biasedly chosen over her because of the artificial hierarchy in our society, where men are placed above women. Through this lens, the most random and average man deserves more power and authority at the expense of a woman who is actually more objectively fit for this position. This can apply to other things like art, science, spirituality, psychology, etc. Women have actually experienced it so much in the last thousands of years under patriarchy, the preference for artificial hierarchy over natural one. So I believe that this is the reason why we, as women, are so much focused on celebrating our achievements, unique talents, and quirks, even if it looks like female supremacy. This is not female supremacy, but women collectively trying to reclaim a sense of self, individuality, and self-actualization, beyond the traditional gender rules, which every human deserves. Women are actually STARVING spiritually. After so many years of surveillance under patriarchy, women have been and still are in a psychological prison, and the freedom is intoxicating. The sovereignty that we craved for so many thousands of years, here it is now, in front of us, and you say that we need to compensate for a man who does us a favor by listening, is addicted to child pornography, and sees Elon Musk as some hero? Come on dude… I also see that many women reclaiming their femininity outside of traditional gender roles, and it is beautiful. Wimen and men deserve to be whole and explore there masculine and feminine unique aspects which makes them: them. Did you know that in pre-patriarchal societies, there were initiation rituals for boys to become men? Teaching them to be ruthless enough to kill but kind enough to contribute to the tribe? To take responsibility? To be a MAN? It seems that there was a forgotten wisdom at that time, so simple: boys are boys, and they will keep being boys until there is a focused effort to make them men. I say forgotten because there are no such rituals anymore. Boys remain boys, and society enables it, “boys will always be boys,” they say. No pressure to become a man, in fact, there is a pressure to remain a boy, to be even more of a boy: emotionally immature, entitled, selfish, ignorant, and spoiled. But this is branded as being a man. Twisted, isn’t it? That’s it, this is what came to my mind after watching this video. I know it’s too short, don’t worry, I may add more later.

I don't agree that menopause was created because of male preferences for young women. As stated in the article, all primates go through menopause. It is not clear how the "evolutionary" researchers concluded that the reason for menopause in humans and other primates is different. The reason for menopause is the same for all, and it is simpler: it is a natural process as part of aging, which every living organism experiences. Men also experience fertility decline around their 40s. This is just less talked about, but men around this age (and even earlier) begin to suffer from signs of infertility. In fact, about 50% of unsuccessful pregnancies are due to male infertility: https://www.nichd.nih.gov/health/topics/menshealth/conditioninfo/infertility The desire of younger men for younger women is natural and harmonious, as both are at the peak of their fertility. Meanwhile, the desire of older men for younger women is unnatural and socially constructed by patriarchy. It is about power and submission, not about love or healthy offspring. A young woman who sleeps with a young man, fertile as she is, is more likely to get pregnant and have healthier children than a young woman who sleeps with an older man. For both older men and women, there are hormonal changes and a decline in fertility as they enter a new period of their lives, the wise period. However, patriarchal societies treat older men with respect, while older women are shamed by patriarchy for simply aging because older women are wiser and not easy to control and are not eager to please. This social shaming of aging women causes much of the pain and discomfort experienced by modern women during menopause. In pre-patriarchal, Indigenous cultures, menopause was celebrated as a “second spring,” an entrance into a wiser and more mature period of life, with women’s wisdom and life experience channeled toward occupying respected leadership positions in their communities. The process of transitioning from being fertile to experiencing menopause was smoother and more seamless in those communities because women were not shamed or ignored as human beings merely for aging.

Chakras are real, and spiritual entities and helpers are real too. If you try to heal certain imbalances using the chakra system, you are very likely to succeed. Some people may rationalize it as placebo or something else, but these are just rationalizations to explain mysterious things the mind can’t comprehend. Entities and spiritual helpers simply exist. I can’t convince anyone who is too rational, but I know there are more dimensions, and certainly there are beings who live in them and communicate through them. I have had various experiences in which entities or spiritual guides communicated with me. In 100% of those cases, their messages were very sober, high-vibrational, and wise. We are usually more receptive to communication from other realms when we are in a state that makes our brain naturally open to this sort of contact (typically deep theta or delta waves, which can be achieved through meditation, yoga and breathing exercises, psychedelics, or sleep). The majority of humanity, most of the time, operates from beta waves, which makes us very unreceptive to intuition or any otherworldly communication most of our lives.

Most men are not interesting to women because they don’t really put in the work to be. Men have a privileged position in a patriarchal society with masculine values, which puts them in a comfortable position to begin with. This position of privilege and comfort ironically makes their character weaker, flatter, boring in the eyes of women, and more conformist to other men in order to preserve the system in which they have privilege. True nonconformity in men at the level so radical that questions the legitimacy of patriarchy is dangerous to this position of privilege. Expecting women to want to be romantically involved with men in this patriarchal system is as absurd as expecting a poor man to like a greedy rich man. If there is any affection between the poor and the rich, it is not a healthy or natural form of it but survival mechanism. Usually, men expect women to do emotional labor and cater to their needs without providing the same in return. This is called the empathy gap between men and women. Many men are completely blind to it. Additionally, there is also the orgasm gap, in which men think only about their sexual needs and see women as a device to fulfill them without considering women as beings with sexual needs as well. Again, many men blind to it. This obviously alienates women from wanting to date men and making so many men undatable. Some men will do everything to avoid facing the root cause and would opt for even more alienating and unhelpful solutions like pickup, which is based on manipulating women. This makes it even more absurd, because here you don’t only expect the poor man to like the rich man who has taken everything from him, but also believe that what will make the poor like more the rich is to manipulate him further. Instead, of simply distributing the power and wealth equally so men and women are in a truly egalitarian position to begin with, which was the natural order of hunter-gatherer society for the majority of human existence. But this already sounds like too much for the privileged. They don’t really want to lose power, they even want to gain more. Egalitarianism feels like a decrease in quality of life, which many men would not accept. They rather whine and blame women.

For me, awakening is a radical transformation. Emotional awareness and processing is one of the things that can lead to it. But as I realized, the genuine will to surrender to the transformation of the self is the way I can best describe as the major thing that triggers the awakening, at least from my experience. It is not easy to surrender to radical transformation, to shed the old skin, old identity, behavior, patterns, beliefs, perceptions, like a snake shedding its skin. It requires courage, overcoming the fear of the unknown and allow everything from the old self that needs to die, to die. Even if we are very attached to it. There is backlash from the ego. The skin becomes sticky, tight, it resists the sedding. The transformation. Like an old person who wants to live a little more at the expense of the newborn. This may be a very difficult and painful process, and at the same time very liberating, because the old skin can be very suffocating. Limiting, like spiritual prison. And once done, we reborn. With new skin. Fresh like a newborn. Looking at the world with new and fresh eyes. Alienated from our old identity, unidentified with the past, strangers to it. Until the next transformation.

Exactly, I think that the internet has very good and positive potential and benefits, like more access to high-quality information (which was gatekept by the minority elites for the majority of human history), and it is a perfect platform to build high-quality businesses and share one’s gifts, wisdom, and art. Unfortunately, it is not used by humanity rationally and intelligently enough. Mostly, it is used as entertainment, or as a way to receive attention, or to fulfill low-conscious selfish needs.

The modern world is terrible, in my opinion, as well. Almost every aspect in this society goes against my values and internal inclinations. If performance and facade are valued in this society, I value authenticity and connection. If power and status are valued in this society, I value character and hard, dedicated work. If arrogance and narcissism are valued in this society, I value vulnerability and humbleness. If mediocrity and conformism are valued in this society, I value individuality, creativity, and courage. Besides that, I feel like a wild animal stuck in a zoo. I am a highly sensitive individual (which is considered a flaw). I have a fear of big cities, roads, and cars. I hate it. It feels so psychopathic. I can understand how animals feel when they are forced to be in this artificial environment.

Attachment = suffering

I’m scared of both hahaha. Its existence makes me want to froze myself and unfroze myself in X years when this shit will be irrelevant.

@BlessedLion Well said, I couldn’t describe it better.

100%! Well said (as always). And on top of that, women are pressured to spend lots of time and money on beauty in order to receive basic respect and job/relationship opportunities, which men can get without all that labor. Women are poorer than men in general, though they work more than men on a daily basis, while women hold only around 30% of the global wealth. And that’s without even including the invisible emotional labor women do. Given all the burdens women endure in society, who the fuck has the time to care about UFOs and philosophy and all this shit? Seriously?? Most of my life, like most women, I worked in low-paid jobs, and a good part of my small salary went on clothes and makeup just so people would take me seriously at the workplace and dating, in a naive period in my life in which I believed in romance. (Deep inside I was always burning with passion to create and to feed my curiosity, to literally be FREE, but I wasn’t able to do that until I chose to be single and started to work remotely and have more work-life balance). Our unique and natural beauty is not enough, so we learned. We feel pressure to constantly “upgrade” our appearance according to the trends so we will not be left behind in this social matrix. Because good character, intelligence, being literally superwoman, none of that ever compensates for female “ugliness”, which according to society, is the most horrible thing a woman can do, a true crime equal to murder. Of course the “ugliness” is more of social construct which changes according to time and era, not really an inherent thing that we posses. Ugliness according to society is not having enough plastic surgeries or the “right” plastic surgeries (not looking Kim Kardeshian enough or any famous super modal or Tik Tok/porn trend of the current year) not wearing enough make up on the face, not having enough clothes (and the trendy ones) in our closet, can grantee us with the label of “ugly”, “unattractive” “neglected” and unworthy of anything worthy in the world. Of course non of it will be said, but we will feel it, and there are multiple ads and social media to pressure us, and people (the brainwashed herd so to speak) will treat us accordingly, until we obey and run to the nearest clothes store, makeup store, or the plastic doctor. We must religiously follow the cult of beauty otherwise… (reminding me the dark ages?). And we also must do it in a way that it looks effortless, as we are just born that way. Because God forbid if we show the truth, of the hard work we do to attain the unattainable beauty standards. This devalues our worth already because we are not “natural perfect beauty” (How dare we to born imperfect??) Society always tries to make us feel insecure and flawed in this unwinnable game. Even if we look like an AI model, society will invent new insecurities for us to be distracted by, so we will NEVER be too focused on the more important things in life, like making money, developing character, learning, seeking truth and wisdom, achieving goals, and making real changes in the world. This is the anti feminist backlash for the all the feminist movements, because patriarchal society can’t really tolerate “too free” women, so it had to invent a new distraction and tool of oppression for women, the chase after unattainable beauty. Capitalistic toxicity combined with religious dogma. Most people are unaware of it, especially men, they see this as the “natural” order to things. Even the most rational men who question everything, will never question the beauty oppression women are experiencing. And dumbly (and very naively, in a very annoying way) will believe that they somehow inherently superior to women because of some divine natural order (rather than politics and systemic oppression).