Devin

"basic" sex

Yeah, it's fair to say semantics but I think there is a more profound meaning here that's being hidden by fetishes and fantasies Well hopefully if we come full circle it won't seem like I'm attacking her, I think I'm just attacking the idea not the person but I'm tired, just woke up in middle of the night and checked my phone

I'm not saying what you do is wrong, I just don't think you know your sexuality

Experiencing and expressing yourself sexually. Fantasies and fetishes are just during sex, but they're purely superficial, they're not sex

No you wouldn't say ours either. Fantasies and fetishes aren't sexuality

Because you wouldn't have fetishes and fantasies without the outside world Just look at how you wrote the previous post, you said "my" sexuality, "my" fetishes and fantasies It's from fear, otherwise they wouldn't be "yours"

I don't think that's sexuality at all, that's all ego

Your sexuality

@Tyler Robinson I can masturbate easily and I haven't looked at porn in years, and it's a much better and fulfilling experience now. Also, there are girls that orgasm quicker than me (male). I thought most girls can cum in a few minutes

I don't see where anyone is recommending semen retention here, porn and masturbation don't have to go hand in hand ?

Many women don't mind too much that their man watches porn I think if the woman was far enough along it wouldn't bother her, she seems in the middle of this and the former and likely won't get to a point where she wouldn't get bothered by it, he will probably out grow this though. I'm sure many men especially on here wouldn't want to be with a woman that watches porn though. I don't think it has to do with sexism. I'm monogamous but I actually wouldn't be hurt if I was cheated on either, so I don't think I'm a good litmus test. I love the idea of growing with someone through those relatively difficult things, most people have too much ego to deal with that much though.

Tolle too, says something like just observe them and let them pass they're not you. You should care in a way though, not letting them be used to make decisions though, they're usually something unprocessed in your subconscious mind poking out. Ignoring them sounds like resistance to me, the opposite of what Leo said

I'm similar, I always felt worse following emotions or "pleasure". I follow my intuition but not my emotions, I do listen to them though, they are just indicators of something I need to process though not something to act upon. Following intuition and rationale is what keeps me peaceful, real pleasure

Yeah. I think my bias is that I think porn is sh!t and that it keeps you from going deeper into your sexuality than just the surface. I think it takes away from your partner in that way, which is what I think she is getting at, you can't go deeper with your partner, your sex will suck, porn's fake it lies to you about sex, if he TRIES quitting porn and going deeper with her he will see porn was holding him and their relationship back and he'll be disgusted by porn for it. Trying this would be good for the relationship, you should be able to help each other grow in healthy ways, she isn't telling him to quit she's telling him she will leave if he doesn't, expressing a boundary, not manipulation; healthy. It doesn't just effect him it effects their sex life. Like saying if you keep getting drunk I'm leaving. You could try to figure something out with keeping porn too, sure, I'm being biased for sure. The girl I'm with likes porn and I don't have a problem with it, so I don't think I'm too biased though.

@Adam M When you take a break from porn does she ever turn you down when you want sex? You say you prefer masturbating because it's easier, have you tried letting her do the work in those instances? Women like quickies part of the time too, they love getting their guy off

"As for why don't I just have sex with her? Well, for one, masturbating alone is a completely different experience than sexual intercourse. Having sex requires tremendous focus and energy (for the guy mostly) and if I feel very tired... lazy... and just want to cum... it's a lot less pressure and more relaxing for me to just masturbate on my own. " He says THE reason he doesn't have sex with her is because he wants to masturbate to porn instead, not that she doesn't want to.

"As for why don't I just have sex with her? Well, for one, masturbating alone is a completely different experience than sexual intercourse. Having sex requires tremendous focus and energy (for the guy mostly) and if I feel very tired... lazy... and just want to cum... it's a lot less pressure and more relaxing for me to just masturbate on my own. My girlfriend says that she "feels" when I've masturbated... which is pretty obvious. My energy is slightly less." You're the one redefining cheating She wants more sex, he wants porn instead of sex. Porn is shit, it has nothing to do with expressing your sexuality it can only help you suppress your sexuality.

yes he did Sunday 1:23 pm post I'm not arguing that, it can distract you from your sexuality and sex, it definitely doesn't replace it. Cheating doesn't mean replacing

Sexuality is how you experience and express YOURSELF sexually, porn watching is not sexuality it's deception

No, he said he prefers masturbating over intercourse. Textbook porn addict symptom

Ahhhh, Yeah I need breaks for sure, just sounded like a more permanent statement from you. I mean we don't need to do some specific tasks, it's just whatever we do conscious

Seems to me someone in that position would need to take a serious break once in a while

In the first post he says his girlfriend complains they don't have enough sex He masturbates to it, It's cheating You're right

Yeah, from a worldly perspective that stuff sucks, but "suffering" from/with those things is an adventure/experience a different spice of life to taste. We don't actually make progress on the world scale for raising consciousness, like growing a corporation. The only way you raise consciousness is just by being conscious, there's nothing to do beyond that.

I don't see why you have to pretend there's separation, to me it's like reading or watching a story, it's a fun adventure, I don't pretend when reading and I still like to