hi this is my first post
so im 21 have been into spiritual development and daily meditation for 4 years, during this time i wasn't interested in women and wanted to focus on self actualization and my life purpose and felt that i didn't have enough time for dating. though on halloween of 2021 i approached a group of women for fun, no intention of gaming. One of them asked for my number i went on a date with her, she didn't want a second. but since then dating has peaked my interest and i've racked up 80 approaches in the past 3 months, got numbers off a few but essentially got rejected by all of them. I am now at the point where im wondering whats wrong with me and if i approached from now on that i would just reek of desperation and not enjoy the process. I know leo said in his series that this desire will be a thorn in your side and will inhibit you from doing spiritual work and it has since i have started caring about this part of my life. I don't want to go to clubs anymore as i usually end up taking drugs when i do though i am willing to use dating apps and approach when im going about my day, at the gym for example. I feel that it will be many months before i have success in this area of my life and am wondering whether i should begrudgingly double down on approaching or get to the point in my spiritual practice where i dont need intimacy with others. what are your thoughts? and at what point along the spiritual path can one truly be happy without ever getting acceptance or intimacy from others?
