how kind of u to make this sorta thread! ??thank you! 
I agree 100% with almost all of ur takes on spiritual quest. 

Okay so i have noticed that whenever i am talking to a girl and another guy is also talking to her, either directly (same set) or indirectly (social circle stuff for example etc) and the guy is better looking than me i start to feel a bit outmatched. When it is just me and the girl talking i tend to block the idea that other people even exist but in general you will have multiple guys competing for the same girl, especially if the girl is somewhat decent. "This girl is being hit up by 3-4 other guys that look better than you, why should she choose you" is a thought i have sometimes when i am by myself reflecting. Basically i am intimidated by male competition. When it is just me and the girl, things are fine, i am quite confident and do my thing. When the idea that other guys are competing with me i tend to feel somewhat inferior and second doubt myself. Usually it is appearance that i feel insecure about because where i live most people are quite good looking (tall, blonde, good jaw etc) and i am more dark skinned, shorter (although muscular) and okayish decentish features but nothing crazy.
Sometimes i am also intimidated if the other guys have more charisma or are more dominant than me although where i live that is not usually the issue. So what do i do to feel more confident about this?
Should i just block the competition thoughts on my head 24/7 or? Any advice would be reccomended.
I know some of you will say to be funny, confident etc but most guys from what i have seen are like that. Especially humour, everyone has it. I have barely met any guys in my life without a sense of humour. It is very hard to differentiate yourself with just humour. Keep in mind i am naturally introverted and low energy person (although quite decent social skills, and very high social intelligence).

“Resentment is like drinking poison and waiting for the other person to die.”
 
This right here is an extremely powerful DIY exercise to alleviate resentment.
 
Think of one person in your life who has aggrieved you. ( Both my Mother and Father in my case , buy you may pick anyone )  
Take a blank page and write that person a letter saying anything and everything you wish you had ever told them. Really get into this—you have nothing to lose. Make sure you write it out by hand.  
When you’ve gotten absolutely everything off your mind and onto paper, put the letter aside  
Take a fresh sheet and write their response just the way you wish they would respond. You might have them taking responsibility for their actions, acknowledging and apologizing for everything they’ve ever done that hurt you. You don’t need to find any justification for their actions, just an acknowledgment and an apology. It’s your imagination, so you get to decide exactly what you’d like to hear.  
I consider myself a 7.5 / 10 at inner work and I thought I have worked through pretty much everything but MAN this exercise had me sobbing QUICK,
 
Enjoy!
 
EDIT : You may not feel an immediate internal shift. However, over the next few days you may be amazed to feel this “new reality” gradually taking hold.
To accelerate the process, simply reread the apology letter nightly for a few days. You’ll appreciate the results.

Here in Germany, the Netherlands and many other european countries ravers get together to celebrate life in a unified field of consciousness and vibration. My favourite festival is QLIMAX, here are some sneak peaks
 
listen to the lyrics from the song at 35:50
And my all time favourite empowering song that encapsules the idea of being true to your essence and heaving the courage to listen to your heart is at 32:00, That song got me through a major health crisis.
I have realized that this music is my life purpose. I will make it, no matter what it takes.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KscNhnGYxSM

Not knocking your experience, but I have no need for this myself. I don't know how this is possible to do in a relationship either. Passion needs to be expressed somehow. Men who are able to master this practice are exceptionally talented people. If you are a man with a high sex drive it's kinda like eating. You can't be happy without eating some. You don't have to gorge McDonalds but you need to eat. To say you should be able to be peaceful and happy without sex is very much disowning one of your core needs. It's like saying you should be able to be peaceful and happy without food and water. "Food is a biological necessity that controls you as long as you frame it that way." It's an unrealistic, ridiculous litmus test and not the game of life.  
 

Blue’s expression of red is violent nationalism and genocide of an other, Orange’s expression of red is predatory economic sanctions and drone strikes, Green’s expression of red is some thugs and hippies during a protest setting a cop car on fire and looting an Apple store.

For one, white women try to divorce themselves from their white privilege in attempt to be apart of the club. But they are clearly way more self entitled and shitty than people who face real oppression. And the shittiest part is that their voices are heard more often than other oppressed groups.
On top of that, they use this idea of oppression (which is really just insecurity) as a reason to be shitty to other people.
A prime example is my roommate situation. I roomed with two white women. A few months ago, I got really sick and had to get a serious surgery for my gallbladder. On top of that I was carrying my corpse through finals. And during that week I let the dishes go (it was honestly hard to tell which were mine because my other roommates didn't do their dishes either). But instead of understanding my situation and even trying to discuss and communicate the issue, they waited until I went out of town for the surgery and tried to tear me apart through text. Calling me a self entitled man expecting them to clean everything. They tried to make me feel like a straight up piece of shit.
Fast forward a few months. One of these roommates had their alcoholic mom stay over for a fucking week, and they TRASHED the kitchen. They just got drunk for days on end and left it a wreck. When I asked her to clean it so I could cook, she just cussed me out and said I'm just as messy (a straight up lie).
Her mom heard and decided to clean up because she knew it was out of hand. And my roommate got angry that "she was submitting to a man telling her to clean" and punched a mirror and threw it out the window. She also left that broken mirror in our driveway for days before cleaning it up.
So in the minds of an 'empowered white woman', if I don't clean up my mess, I am sexist and disrespectful. But if I ask them to clean up their mess, I am also sexist and disrespectful.
White feminism is the biggest bullshit in our current culture. And the saddest part is that it will probably be one of the only 'issues' that will ever be addressed in our modern times.
I pray that one day society will see through their bullshit.

Attraction Doesn't Exist in a Vacuum Part 4: Hypermasculinization and Hyperfeminization
I feel like I have touched on both of these when it comes to racial fetishization. I know that hypermasculinization is huge thing for black people (and I think also Latino people due to things like the angry brown woman trope that isn't just limited to black women even though black women face this at a much greater extent) and by painting them as hypermasculine, any amount of pain or vulnerability or softness that comes from the effects of systems of oppression are stripped away and instead are replaced with this notion of "we can continue treating them badly because they have the pain tolerance and they can take it." Hyperfeminization is a huge thing for a lot of Asian people. By painting Asian men in a hyperfeminized light, society paints them as emasculated and not as empowered as men of other races as if they are some how less of a man or weaker. For Asian women, there is the whole "submissive Asian woman" trope on how she lacks authority and agency and as a result is seen as more desirable because she isn't seen as a threat.  
I think living in Texas as a South Asian woman gives me an intersectional perspective on this. On one hand you have people who see me as Asian first and see me in this hyperfeminine light but also there are people who confuse me for being Hispanic and that comes with it's own problems with being seen as hypermasculine and angry. I don't have a mixed identity but I feel like different people see different things depending on their prejudices and attitudes. I also think even when you take getting mistaken for being Hispanic out of the picture that being Indian is kind of in this awkward in between in these dynamics especially when South Asian men are taken into account. Because on one hand again, you're seen as this submissive Asian woman trope especially when you take into consideration the ways that South Asian men and women are treated differently in the family. But on the other hand, you are seen in this hypermasculine light when you are compared to white women who are seen as the feminine beauty ideal. In those situations, you get seen as this hairy disgusting angry beast.   
(Tangent: The whole body hair thing has shades of pedophilia but also racism and capitalism involved. Racism comes into the picture because a lot of POC tend to be hairier or have darker hair compared to white people and that has been used as a justification that POC are more animalistic and less evolved. Capitalism comes into play because the whole thing with women shaving came up during the world wars because men were going off to war and dying. As a result, razor companies wanted to target women as a way of making up their lost profits.)
In short, hypermasculinization is associated with being seen as a heartless beast with little to no human qualities and everything you say is exaggerated as being violent and doing the absolute most because the people in power would rather have you being quiet. Hyperfeminization is associated with having your agency stripped from you and submitting to whoever is in the top of the hierarchy because your human thoughts, needs, and emotions don't matter and you're essentially like a child who is at the mercy of who is in charge of you. 
Both of hypermasculinization and hyperfeminization come down to a lack of respect and dehumanization because you aren't seeing that person or that group of people as they really are. You are instead simplifying them to a collection of tropes and you're taking their expressions to the extremes to where they ignore anything else about the person. To reiterate from the previous post: 
And I think that by taking this into consideration, it's so important to be both well integrated yourself but also have a well integrated view of other people especially when women and people of color come into the picture. Going into extreme hypermasculinity or hyperfemininity or expecting other people to do so doesn't help anyone. 

Attraction Doesn't Exist in a Vacuum Part 3: PH Categories 
Annnnnd there is that whole other post on this. I remember about a year ago there was a post that was going around on twitter that was along the lines of "are you a pornhub category or are you priviledged?" And honestly, that's a fat mood. 
While analyzing an individual's kinks/preferences can be a messy process in the sense that I don't always think it's appropriate to psychoanalyze what people are into and why (can be a whole nother topic tbh), I think analyzing the collective trends and preferences to be something that is important to look into as a way of cultivating social awareness through analyzing the collective ego.
In a way, I think that the categories that are most popular on ph can be quite revealing as well as the way different groups of people are portrayed. Though they may be pleasant I don't see emotions like desire or joy as inherently positive emotions. I think it's important to also look into things that spark up positive feelings in us in order to work through any shadow elements that maybe present. Which is why I think it's important to pay attention to what turns people on collectively. 
I think something that makes more sense than only looking at porn through the male gaze is specifically seeing it through the gaze of white men. I have talked to POC and regardless of gender, there is a consensus that a lot of porn gives off an icky feeling especially when specific categories are taken into account. I think one of the best examples of this is how black men are portrayed in porn. They pick out the most stereotypical role for black men and reduce them down to this hype masculine trope. And this really comes up when interracial porn comes into the picture which a lot of the time, interracial usually means a black man and a white woman. Even though interracial porn isn't limited to that (i.e. you can have a white person and a latino person and it's still interracial), odds are the videos that are tagged as interracial usually follow that particular format. 
I don't think this whole thing being a fetish is a coincidence. There is a whole history dating back to slavery of how black men are seen as hyper masculine, sexually deviant, and having this thirst for white women because white women are painted as this ideal for femininity. There is a history of how black men were often targeted with false rape accusations towards white women just so white men can have an excuse to torture black men.  Basically by even looking at a white woman in the wrong way can easily land you into a lot of trouble. And I think that people who are into categories  of porn that sexualize an entire group of people tends to literally get off to the idea of their prejudices being confirmed through this narrow form of representation. 
There are also a lot of white women who sexualize tf out of black men. There is this whole thing of how some white women try to get with men of color as a way to piss off their parents and be adventurous. I know a couple of guys who got into situations like that and it's messed up to say the least. Granted, I don't have personal experience in this but from what I can gather is that when you end up dating a person like this, you aren't building a relationship or a narrative together. It's their world and you're just living in it. And you aren't really living in it as a well fleshed out character either. You're reduced down to this particular trope and as this object that is just there to symbolize going against your parents. They aren't with you because they are genuinely into you and care about you. They are with you because you represent something to them. In my opinion, seeing someone for who and what they are is a factor that goes into respecting a person. And respect is something that is incredibly important in any romantic and sexual situation. Knowing you're respected and that the other person sees you as you are is the gateway to intimacy emotionally and psychologically. By seeing someone as a collection of symbols and a narrow trope limits the complexity of that person and therefore you aren't seeing them for who they really are.
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Also, the fact that "teen" and "barely legal" categories are popular is concerning. Like, why tf are we hyper fixating on really young women like that as a culture? Also, it brings into the whole pedo culture that is in the beauty industry and how much youth is considered the end all and be all for a woman as if the little amount of worth we have expires at a certain age.  Then there is the whole body hair thing and being really skinny and petite etc. And I'm not trying to define what a "real woman" is or to say that "real woman have curves" or some other bs. I'm not saying that if you're into really petite women that you're a pedo either. We're allowed to have preferences but it doesn't hurt to be mindful or aware of where those preferences come from. All I'm saying is that it's rather sus that we put traits that are associated with prepubescent girls on a pedestal as something that women should aspire to. It's very sus on how in general we tend to infantilize women socially through mansplaining things to them and treating as if they are irrational children who aren't capable of doing much and then at the same time have shit like this be glorified in porn. It's very sus that we take things like naivety, a lack of life (or sexual) experience, and submission and collectively associate them with femininity. 
It's as if being overpowered is simply part of the feminine condition. And in a way it is because of the way society treats women and feminine presenting people. But to say that our experiences are inherently like that because of nature and that this is just the way it always is and always will be is dangerous. 
And I feel like as far as collective standards go, there isn't an equivalent for men to be young in order to be considered attractive. Even when women say they like shorter guys or skinnier guys, or guys that have that "pretty boy/ feminine" look/energy to them, age and youthfulness doesn't come into the conversation as much. Most of the things that correlate with cultural notions of an ideal man usually has to do with height, a developed body, hair etc. In other words, signifiers that you are in fact a grown ass man. The same can't be said about the cultural notions of the ideal woman especially when the whole "men gain value after the age of 25 and women lose value after that age" thing is taken into consideration (the whole thing is so predatory and icky.... I just can't. I feel like I talked about how that's fucked up all over this forum back when I still had the emotional energy to engage in certain places on this forum).   

This tells me that you haven't gone deep enough on the source of your lack of self-love and approval.
Self-love practices are good, but they are surface level. A temporary action to raise your vibration for today, but not always tomorrow.
Like we discussed in DMs, if you want approval, there is deeper work you can do to go back to the root of that lack of self-approval, heal it, and your problem is solved. Your favorite shadow work method should be enough to get you there in most cases.

Actually, needing something from them is what is stopping you from being truly authentic and enjoying the dates.
Wanting sex from them is not only okay, but without that there is no point in going on the date!
Are you okay expressing your desire for a woman openly, or is there some shadow around that?
Are you currently in a place where you can say: "I'm attracted to you" without flinching or making yourself uncomfortable, thus projecting an incongruent vibe?
 
If you have a shadow around your desire, then the next step is to work through that by practicing honest expression. (Learn to say: "I think you're hot.", "I would fuck you", "I'm attracted to you" from a comfortable, detached place) If you actually have neediness, then your sense of being complete without her needs work, and is what is missing.
The best way to do that is to create a life you love, that you think is awesome even without a woman.
The quick and dirty way around it is to just have more dates on the calendar.  

It's largely insecurity. Red pill is shit, stop listening to it. Some loser pick up coaches that have the word beta in their vocabulary will harp on about this because they are under developed and actually incredibly inexperienced with women. I would firstly watch your information intake. Tons of toxic ideologies and mindsets in this domain and it's presented as advice which is stored in your mind and transmitted out through your body making you insecure and weak. When such clowns find out the girl they like has been with other guys their feelings curdle like milk and they have an existential crisis. They think they were the ones with game when the game was playing them all along.
Let me be clear, It's one thing to still want to fulfill your own sexual desires. To want to have lots of sexual experiences with various women, because women are awesome and beautiful. The feeling of sexual freedom in this domain as a man feels great. I feel this way sometimes as well, wanting freedom from my relationship to have sex with other women. It's perfectly normal. It feels good to be single or have the opportunity to experience different women and have various sexual partners. And it's also perfectly normal to have some envy or frustration when you can't do this because you are in a relationship. Sometimes your partner may have already fulfilled or explored these desires or aspect for herself. This may even bring up some envy in you and some anger that you can't do the same. That's all normal and the feelings that come about because of that are healthy. This can be handled through healthy forms of discussion and working on having a fulfilling sex life with your partner. You can also choose to be single again and pursue other women if you so please. You are free to choose and free to fulfill your desires in healthy ways. Her sexual past says nothing about who you are and if you think it does you are purely assigning that meaning to yourself.
It's another thing to create some sort of toxic judgement based ideology because you are intimidated by a woman choosing to do whatever she so pleases with her body. All you need to be concerned with here is if you are having safe sex and the past doesn't affect present health, being honest with each other about your desires and what counts as infidelities, and being transparent with each other about your pasts with boundaries that are comfortable with both partners, and then you are free to choose to invest in this woman knowing the information you do about her. She is under no obligation to disclose everything about her sexual past to you. That can feel very judging and painful for her. She may have been assaulted or been in a dark pattern where she had sex due to a traumatic response. You are free to choose if you do / don't want to be with her based off what you do / don't know about her past but not in a way where you judge her for it, force her to disclose more information she isn't comfortable with, or make labels up for her and shame other guys that are happy to be with her.
The guys who get all defensive and butt hurt about this couldn't hold down a healthy relationship to save their lives. Their dick game is awful too and far from great. You can't reach sex god statues holding onto this type of judgement AND at the same time fuse your passion and love energies together. It's not possible. Stop listening to this awful advice, start trusting your own guidance and focus on fulfilling your own desires in healthy ways. 

Notes about the first approach
He should've calibrated his approach to his surroundings and the chick he was talking to. In the video it looks like he was the only one in that area and so was the girl.
He shouldn't have went up to her and sat down immediately, he should have started of saying something like "Hey im (insert name) you look interesting, just wanted to come over an introduce myself" before he sat down. Pay attention to her body language if she doesn't seem receptive or anxious be courteous, give her a compliment and leave.
He should have been able to pick up on her uneasiness and bailed. Any chick you cold approach should have some level of curiosity or receptiveness there was none here. Even if he sat down and tried to build up that receptiveness and managed to get a number she would flake immediately. You must be able to identify under a minute whether a girl is receptive to you if not move on there's no point remaining in that set.
Also this girl is only 18, she seems very socially awkward and even mentioned this was her first time being approached, i believe her reaction was well justified she wasn't rude, she just didnt know how to process what's going on. 
The guy seems like a newbie, my recommendation to him is to pay attention to body language, its ok for a chick to be awkward but she must be receptive to you if not move on. He lacks experience and the rejection wasn't bad it just happened to be caught on camera can't do nothing about that
Notes on Second Approach
There isnt much to critique here. This dude is just creepy he's following people around on his bike recording them. He literally followed one chick for a full minute before he talked to her wtf. Don't follow people around if your going to open them thats a no no. This guy also doesn't have any vocal range he gives off Elliot Roger vibes.
Vocal tonality is very important when cold approaching. You must seem open and fun this guy is too serious and sounds like he's giving commands or something, really of putting. There's also a "fakeness" in his opener which the girls pick up on immediately.
This guy got jailed because he uploaded videos of women he was hitting on without any consent, he also seems really uncalibrated and cant sense when these chicks are uncomfortable, he tried to force one of the girls to kiss him for christ sake.
Key points
Kudo's to any guy who has the balls to cold approach it takes dozens or hundreds of approaches to develop the calibration needed to pull good results consistently. Being able to recognize receptiveness is the most important part of cold approach. Be open, easy going and relaxed, have a normal opener nothing cringy and pay attention to her body language. If she's not engaged leave its a numbers game for a reason. You should be able to know how a set is going to turn out 30 seconds in never spend more than 1 minute in a bad set. 

I have struggled with the same story myself. I live on a college campus and had feared becoming "the weird pickup guy". I have found multiple solutions. First is welcome being the weird pickup guy, and becoming completely okay with it. Ask yourself "what is the worst that could happen, then fully be okay with it. Imagine yourself being found out, and release all the emotions that that brings up until you are okay with it. the Sedona method is really good for this. The next thing I did was I just worked on being social in general instead of spam approaching girls. I do a 100 hi's exercise, this is where you have to say hi to 100 people in a row without skipping.  You would be amazed at how incredible this exercise is and opening you up, getting you social and comfortable being seen and expressive. I feel like getting comfortable being seen by others is the key. The more people that see you the more people have an opinion on you, but allowing this to happen and then letting it go is what allows you to develop independence from the outcome.

You still have negative emotions and thoughts that you associate with approaching and being seen while approaching while to me, it`s something to be proud of. You have to own it completely and then nobody will care. instead if you can fully own it and set the frame, my experience is that people will look up to you and think it's cool. You can easily set the frame and people will adopt that in their mind if your reality is strong enough. But of course it requires a perspective shift and if you can adopt that new perspective, people will respond to that. If you have negative emotions associated with being seen while approaching, of course that transfers onto people. You can look cool doing anything. It`s all in how you think about yourself. What you think about yourself, people will think about you. Of course some people will have judgments based of their own conditioning and certainly when they have had a too small sample size of your personality and not much experience of your inner being. But I can't think of one reason why you would care about the opinion and judgements of those people anyway. In reality, everyone is busy in their own bubble and nobody cares about what you are doing. Just own what you are doing, be authentic, congruent and when you approach, make sure you do it with an embodied energy and also a giving energy and then you'll never stand out as the creep of the town.