Consept

Im not too sure about this, what ive noticed from becoming more aware is that you just cant change thoughts and actually trying to change your thoughts creates more thoughts and resistance, 'you cant get stillness from action'. So i think what makes more sense to me is acceptance and actually love for your negative thoughts, all thoughts come from some where and in a sense they mean well, for example your brain might want you to procrastinate as a survival mechanism, because if you dont do anything you will survive, its important to acknowledge these but not necessarily follow them. I feel what youre saying is to actively change thought patterns and i dont really see how you can do this by just willing it. There is of course CBT but the method is very different and it doesnt really extend to manifesting and the things LOA offers. LOA seems a bit simplistic in this sense

This is a good point, if thoughts arise themselves, how is it possible to control them?

What youre saying of course is not wrong, this has been around in psychology for many years, Maslows scarcity/abundunt mindsets, Jungs shadows. What i think the problem is, is that people turn this into a religion, where they force themselves to have positive thoughts by suppressing other thoughts, this is the opposite of what Jung was talking about. The self-help industry is worth $10 billion a year, many LOA teachers can make money with books, seminars etc and people eat it up, so theres a clear incentive to put these ideas out there with defense of 'if it doesnt work for you, you just didnt believe enough', which keeps people wanting more and more, without necessarily getting results. The other thing is that there is no scientific law of attraction, it doesnt exist or even make sense, like doesnt necessarily attract like in the world, the same polarity magnets repel, so its a good way to attract more materialist type people of our time. A great example is the MLM industry, they really preach the LOA and show people that have 'made it' to new recruits. Only the top maybe 2% will make anything that looks like an average wage, yet they can cover themselves by saying you didnt believe in what you were doing enough thats why you werent successful. If the LOA worked all of these people should be successful but of course they cant be because of the structure of the system theyre in. If everyone in India believed in it and wanted to be rich, it literally wouldnt work as the system is built in a certain way, this extends to all systems around the world

I would consider - 'I already know it’s true because I have seen it at work in my life. So why would I consider it to not be true?' to be a dogmatic position, if someone said that about something you didnt believe in or didnt think was true you would think what they believe is dogmatic if they were to say what you said. Youre scared to question the belief and have to believe it 100% because in your mind if you do you wont attract what you want. This belief system is baked into every religion and ideology you could think of, 'if i dont believe in Allah i will be forsaken' 'If i dont believe in mormonism i will be forsaken', its all the same mechanics, and it is very easy to get into this thought pattern. Its also reinforced by the belief if what i want doesnt come true its because i didnt believe enough, this is textbook stuff. I could literally make up a belief, lets say the sacred turtle, if you believe in him you can have whatever you want, if it works its confirmation, if it doesnt you just didnt believe in him enough. What facts have do you have, aside from you believed in loa and some things happened for you and some things didnt?

Have you tried believing that Jesus rose from the dead? Whats the worst that could happen? Saying its a cult is your perspective, some may have the same opinion on loa and prosperity preachers, especially considering the dogmatic way that you believe in them. You also share the belief system in that if i do everything they tell me to do ill get what i want, so i fail to see the difference in that respect. Speaking of prosperity preachers, i would ask you to watch this and then give me your opinion -

What kind of evidence would you need?

I get what it is, im saying your reasoning to get there is literally the same as scientology or prosperity preachers

So youre saying the distinction is that the law of attraction has been around longer than other ideologies? How do you reconcile that the framework of what you said - Could literally be said for Scientology or prosperity preachers or pretty much anything, ie if i believe it and good things happen in my life it is because of -insert ideology here-, if it doesnt work its because i didnt believe in -insert ideology here- enough

Im not saying its complete bullshit, and yes i agree if you read between the lines there is some great insights and analogies. I assumed you werent religious which is why i used it as an example, but i dont think youre getting my point, ill give you the benefit of the doubt that youre not will-fully ignoring the point. Ill give you another example - Whats the distinction between what youve said and a Scientologist that says 'I know Scientology is real because i followed what they said and ive seen the results in my life. For example i asked for a job and within 3 months i got a job'. Would this make Scientology true?

So whats the distinction between what youve just said and a christian that says 'I know Jesus and my Christian God are real because i prayed and ive seen the results in my life. For example i asked God for a job and within 3 months i got a job'. Would this make Christianity true?

Well that's literally the point, jesus raising from the dead holds no perceived benefit for you so you don't believe it, however a Christian would say you weren't being open minded if you don't believe it. Your logic was that open mindedness doesn't consider if loa is horseshit, I'm saying it would be able to hold that position. I'm also a Christian could use the same logic you used to dismiss any non-believers, it's a standard baked in way of thinking to hold up any idealogy. You don't believe in jesus because you don't have faith, loa doesn't work for you because you don't have faith in it, what's the difference?

Wouldn't true open mindedness be able to hold the two positions in their mind without being tied to one or the other? By your logic true open mindedness wouldn't consider whether jesus rose from the dead or not

Really consider what I'm going to say, what would be the difference between you just saying what you said and a Christian saying that in order to convince that Christianity is the right way? Is the difference that loa is true?

I havent actually seen a non-duality teacher speak on law of attraction, you can show me some if you like. But even if they dont it doesnt prove that its not real or useful. But looking into it its definitely not a law, if youre saying its a scientific law, ie 'like always attracts like', it doesnt hold up as its not the case with magnets for example, the same polarity magnet actually repels. I have noticed through the thread that you have an extreme reaction of agreement if someone has a similar opinion to you and almost anger if someone disagrees. What i would ask is are you able to hold in your mind that loa is not true or are you 100% tied to your belief?

I'm not an expert but I'm pretty sure it's not a scientific law, so I'm not sure exactly what you mean by its a law. I would say I listen to a lot of spiritual and non-dual teachers and I've never heard them talk about the loa, I do usually hear it from more self-help and motivational teachers. But there's nothing wrong with that and if it helps you then good luck to you. You said you've had some successes and some failures with it, would you put the successes as a result of practising loa and what would you say was the cause of the failures?

I'll try and break it down quickly but law of attraction is a genius idea. It's been a highly profitable staple to have the concept of 'if you think positive, positive things will happen for you'. Think and grow rich made a fortune in the past as have 'prosperity preachers' who tie it in with Christianity, and of course today's loa teachers. Under the hood it's all the same concept, give money and time, learn our teachings and good stuff will happen. What's clever about loa is they've tied the name to a scientific sounding principle and the aim is to get cars, houses, wealth, which is very convincing for our materialistic time in history. The key thing is that if you succeed it's because of Loa, if you don't it's because you didn't believe enough or you had blocks, or you consciousness wasn't high enough. Again this is consistent with other forms of this basic idea, for example you weren't praying enough in the case of prosperity preachers. Take into account that the self-help industry is worth around $10 billion, there is a lot of incentive to teach this stuff. Now this is not to say that positive thinking won't help you or that you shouldn't have goals or even want materialistic things, but dressing this up as more than positive thinking with good marketing would be disingenuous.

I'm not sure what you mean by 'it's a law' and comparing it to gravity, do you have any studies or anything on it being a law?

Thanks. It does feel like a blockage but not sure it's food related, feels more like mental blockage and resistance, I know it's connected but also my diet isnt bad and it doesn't really change when I change into the blocked state, so I'm not sure it's the cause

So youre saying just feel the feeling and try not to focus on the perspective?

Can you expand on this a little please, i think i understand what you mean but just want to clarify

How would i listen and not pay attention to her nagging at the same time? Will try this, thanks again for your insight x

Thanks, that is a great insight and very self aware. Its funny because when we have truthful conversations, maybe after an argument or something, she says that she likes how i am and doesnt want me to change but at the same time it annoys her in the moment. So it seems like it is an automatic response and i think youre right in that she isnt always in her feminine, i would put this down to family issues. How did you and possibly your mum, become aware and get passed these issues, if you dont mind me asking?

This is good advice and part of the problem I'm having, because I don't want to accept traditional rules of a relationship and I want to, not only be who I am but obviously grow, its difficult for her to fully accept it, although she does try. It's kinda crazy how tied people are to the idea of what a relationship is or means

Yeah for real lol. Thing is it's a fine line, how I dealt with that is I told her that I'm not gonna put up with stuff like that and that essentially if you are gonna act like that I can't be around you, she got upset and kinda explained why she is like that. Now it did cross my mind to not react at all, but if I didn't maybe it would be like condoning it or making her think it's alright or I'm submissive. This was obviously a huge over reaction on her part and to be fair she hasn't had as extreme a reaction since then and this was a while ago now. But I'm kinda stuck between calling out the behavior or not giving any fucks as you say

Thanks so much for your insight, especially valuable as you relate to her. With point 1, its interesting you should say that because she has specifically said a few times that she likes the way i argue, in that i make my points well and without injecting hurt emotions and that kind of thing, so essentially she cant really argue back as im trying to solve the problem rather than hurt them or whatever, this has been the case with past relationships as well. I have read that book and a few others on the subject so ive probably taken a lot of that into the relationships. The reason i get annoyed by the nagging is not even necessarily the nagging itself, its just i know if she keeps doing it i wont be able to be around her. Although sometimes i do feel like i want validation from her, i am aware of that though and try not to fall in that trap. Point 2 she went to therapy with her ex-partner and i think this type of thing came up although not specifically what you said, i would say she would benefit from going, ive recently gone, i did about 6 months or so. Problem is i dont think she sees her issues as a massive problem as shes very focused on work, so im not sure that would appeal. But when i have brought up these issues she is very receptive, so shes not in denial or anything like that, its more that she literally doesnt know how to control them. What happened in your relationship and is it something that youve overcome or at least made progress with?