Sugarcoat

I see. I recognize it’s just words for me now and maybe intuition too but I like discussing it anyway

That’s an interesting observation. Because I have came to a point in my life I have overcome shyness, I don’t feel afraid to talk to people. But I still find myself just an uncomfortable around some people. The best is to be authentic, and simultaneously keep developing yourself so your authenticity improves

Ok I notice we occasionally use words without knowing the proper definition. I googled addiction and it sounds more severe than I have. So I could perhaps say I am mildly addicted . “Unthinking indulgences “ is good description, because it’s like you’re acting from impulse Acting from impulse is in a way one of the nicest feelings, because it feels effortless and natural. It’s just sometimes our impulses drive us to do things that might interfere with obligations and can feel like our mind is all over because we’re so stimulated So id like to get to a point where my impulses feel more balanced Yes it’s a good mindset. Even if it takes some time the craving will probably pass

@Schizophonia I agree I think daydreaming and using music to support it, is partially caused by an unstable or lacking sense of self irl and that you’re not expressing yourself how you want and are insecure. So it’s important to work on those things I will try and see what benefits unhooking myself gives me

I am able to stick to my diet plan significant amount of time. But sometimes I overeat on weekends, on sweets for example, and sometimes I find myself going back and forth to the fridge and snacking Regarding music. It gives me significant dopamine. So almost immediately upon waking I crave it. And I find myself listening when I’m on my way somewhere. When I’m getting ready for bed. Sometimes I’ll procrastinate studying and instead vibe to music So basically it is a problem to a certain degree. It’s not super major. But I feel I wanna get to point where there isn’t such a frequent urge to indulge . By addiction I mean I feel a very frequent urge and it can feel hard to stop

Some non dualist say “the self never happened/the story never happened”. As if it’s not even something arising in reality because it doesn’t exist. I don’t know ofc . It’s just deep to me…

I feel occasionally when i don’t click with someone , a factor can be that I don’t feel fully comfortable around them , or I’m not being fully authentic (not that I’d automatically click with them if I was fully authentic but basically I can’t know) . But maybe you’ve passed that stage. Otherwise I agree

I can only speak for myself but id say I have a relatively deep mind and I enjoy deep convo but I am currently hooked on certain addictions like social media. It does affect my mind ofc, I could probably be even more interesting if I unhooked from those things (I’m working on it) but it’s possible for them to co exist So I think it’s worth to be the one to lead convos where you want them to go, in a way that feels fitting, because you might reveal things about the person you didn’t expect… I definitely agree. Yes. You both have the factor of just having to expose yourself to enough people in the right places to increase the chance of finding someone that matches you, and also importantly expressing yourself authentically so people have opportunity to connect with you authentically, if you play that down you can form shallow connections instead …

I’ve also passed my phase of social anxiety in my life and developed enough social skills to be able to socialize and attract partners (but I’m still very much introverted) I think when you come to this point it’s mostly a matter of just exposing yourself to more people, at the right places, taking opportunity to talk. Maybe you do that enough already so sorry if I’m stating the obvious. But let’s say you’re a guy like yourself and you go to nightclub then maybe chance is very low you’ll find a woman of your wavelength , but if you look at the right places the chances are higher. Also maybe obvious again, but have you tried to have deeper convos with women or do you more just vibe as usual and kinda wait for them to show signs of depth. Because sometimes people might reveal it when someone else goes to that place first.. idk. Like you might not notice the depth of someone if you don’t initiate that type of convo first I hope mods don’t remove this topic thinking it’s offensive or something because it’s genuinely interesting and we need to be able to talk about flaws of humanity, in respectful manner ofc🙂‍↔️🙂‍↔️

Death is not guarantee of something better. It could be worse. Or the reincarnation cycle could just continue, so staying the same. So really think deeply about it. You could start with what feels most accessible to change. Something like your mindset if that feels doable, how you think about external circumstances. If you’re in physical pain it’s a trickier thing.

I think it’s based on how you feel. If you feel energetically stable throughout the day without excessive caffeine or if you’re in mania or something then it shows you’ve gotten enough sleep. It’s hard to lie to yourself, when you feel tired you’re most likely gonna feel it. And it’s the first sign of sleep deprivation, other less obvious health effects come later so tiredness is the easiest predictor I have recently changed into going to bed exactly 8 hours before waking. So I’m getting a bit less than 8 hours of sleep because it takes a little time to fall asleep. I’m gonna try and see how I feel. I think you could just experiment with it, if you wanna save time it’s good idea, then if you feel good you know it’s enough One tip tho is to reduce stress level as much as possible because the more peaceful you are the more restoration your body gets throughout the day and you’ll need a bit less sleep

Yes I think it’s good idea I find one challenge with socializing tho is that if you’re not naturally very social (gain a lot of dopamine from social interactions in general) then you’re gonna be quite selective about which people you click with, you’re only gonna gain significant satisfaction and feel flow when you click with someone So when you meet people you’ll gonna go through a lot of convos that you feel aren’t flowing so good and you don’t click with them. And at times it can feel discouraging. But you gotta keep going because eventually you’ll find that person you click with well

Some people say, and I have thought along these lines, how it all kinda boils down to the brain, its chemistry etc then secondarily the body (for psychological health). Even someone like sadghuru sometimes can say something like how you are like a chemical soup. But then don’t make the mistake of limiting this chemistry to the physical. You could say the mind/psyche/personality is manifestation of this. But also it goes the opposite way, so the mind etc affects the inner chemistry. So a bad mind means some kind of bad chemistry, but it doesn’t mean to fix the bad chemistry you should fix the physical (like your hormones or get a medication or something). It could mean what you actually need to do is fix your mind. And in turn that will balance the chemistry. So when people exclude physical health and just speak of the mind, they might not agree but the mind plays into health, so it’s actually linked and they’re speaking of health too It’s just a matter from which side you attack it. By changing your mindset, challenging your fears, meeting and talking to people, meditating etc, all those things change the mind and it will in turn change your chemistry . So don’t be fooled by thinking you have to deal with the chemistry exclusively via the chemistry itself…

It seems in order to have an experience, there has to be a sense of self who’s having the experience (for example the experience of a really long time). I’ve thought similarly to Leo myself, how something that isn’t absolutely true (the self) cannot survive indefinitely. It’s like the “false” self is a certain structure that has to be maintained, it’s an activity that has to constantly cover the truth, meanwhile the nature of reality is structureless so it’s just “there” indefinitely. Without the self, reality is nothing in a way. So maybe it’s more relevant to ask, can the self stay forever. Because it’s the self that makes distinctions between things and experiences reality as real. It doesn’t make sense to me that some aspect of reality would dream a self forever, so it being one single conscious being that is conscious forever and forever has an experience. Because reality isn’t limited so why would it limit some part of itself to one particular form forever, instead of changing. Also you could say, if the self isn’t real, then that gives it even more instability because it’s not an actual manifestation of reality that takes place…. Just some thoughts. But to be more specific, you asked if it could feel like you’re dreaming forever. I don’t think it’s possible because I don’t think it’s possible to experience eternity if it’s not actual eternity if that makes sense.

A spontaneous thought would be that reality doesn’t follow laws and logic so anything could happen ..(I think) But on the other hand it seems anything that manifests (anything that isn’t nothing basically) has a certain “logic” or “way of being/working”, it’s like it has to have that in order to exist . So maybe everything has some kind of logic to it, it’s possible to explain, but the logic can be very twisted and not fit into the conventional science. But for now I don’t know that particular explanation. Maybe something about how time doesn’t work like we think

When you’re trying to sleep but you think about the possibility of being tortured for eternity…

Eheheh 🤓🤣

Typical woman, has nothing to contribute to just sits there looks cute and laughs when the men say funny things …

Evolution

Hate when it happens..

Yea and the person won’t even notice they’re doing it…

You mean like confirmation bias? Yea 🫨🫨

I think it’s fine to categorize yourself and people according to models as long as you don’t lock yourself into that particular paradigm and remain open minded and combine your assessments with your intuition and not only your logical brain 🙂‍↔️

I was going through a hard time during that period, so I believe it was some kind of entity that visited me, perhaps a “spirit guide” that some claim everyone has. Sometimes during sleep paralysis hallucinations can arise, but for me they’ve always been very random so I can tell it’s a hallucination But this particular instance, it was so specific, and relevant what she said, that I’m sure it was not a hallucination . Also she said something that is said within non duality, how “reality is love”. It makes me feel that non duality is true It’s like how some people can meet entities during astral projection. It seems these kind of states can gain us access to another “realm” of reality where we can gain contact with non human intelligent entities It’s very cool! My tip is to remain calm during sleep paralysis, because if you’re scared you’re more likely to have scary hallucinations, but if you’re calm I think it opens possibilities for more positive experiences

One time during sleep paralysis I felt this female presence and she told me, that suffering is “love”