Sugarcoat

I think shit testing is a subconscious thing , almost manipulation in some cases, where you’re trying to gather information about someone to asses them more accurately, especially if you’re having suspicions or if you have negative experiences in the past so you wanna be on the safe side. You might not wanna expose this to the other person so to not ruin the mood, so you do it in sneaky indirect way instead. I’m a woman and I’m not sure if I do shit testing, if I think about it, maybe if I’m unsure about a guy I might make jokes to him about him having “side chicks” , about him “only wanting one thing” or something of that sort, and the response could give me a clue. But if you like a person, and the vibe is well, you aren’t doing it with the intent to expose something bad in them, because you get the vibe they’re good, but you can’t always know that for sure so you might try to feel more sure by doing these “shit tests”. If I’m understanding you correctly Maybe I sound like a massive party pooper or something hahahahaah

Yea exactly I was actually thinking about that too, how we can’t assume what we perceive is the actual nature of reality, which probably many assume (like thinking they see things as they are and not being “filtered “ through the mind). So we can’t assume our experience as an absolute truth

The real wondering is important so you don’t get stuck in a mental idea and defend it at all costs but instead you’re genuinely interested in what’s the truth so you’re ready to reevaluate your ideas when experience doesn’t support them

I guess you mean asking questions that connect directly to one’s experience

I guess the person by default deals with things in dualistic manner, forming ideas about things, relating to them like objects of desire or not. But to get to the core of something means not doing that, so it’s in conflict with the normal way a human operates, and it’s not always easy to give up that normal mode of operation, that’s why non duality is turned into ideas for folks. Self honesty is important to see this, and it can be useful to start where you are by asking questions as you say

It’s like with science

I don’t seem to get the non separate part

I don’t really find it frustrating tho as I don’t really seek mental understanding

I have been considering wether to take notes using my computer or to write by hand By hand: Pros: You can write uncommon signs/symbols (for example in chemistry) that can be hard to know how to write on computer. Draw arrows between sentences, add color etc. Apparently it helps memorization when you have to physically write something If you wanna use your computer, you’ll have less tabs that you have to switch between and move around , because you have your notes separate from the computer. Cons: Takes longer. Messier. Not as pretty. Harder to edit. Computer: Pros: Faster to write, faster to edit. Cleaner. You have everything in one place so it’s less stuff to keep track off Cons: Hard to write certain odd symbols unless you have a lot of technical skill. Maybe not as good in making you remember as when you write by hand • Other thoughts about notetaking: Sometimes it’s hard to know what to write. Today I mostly wrote down key words/points, but the thing is, key words are already present in the PowerPoint that the lecturer shows (that is accessible to students later too). So it feels unnecessary to only write key phrases. The best thing would be to write down things that are NOT present in PowerPoint, but that the lecturer says. But if you do only that; you will have notes that are just a bunch of random facts without context, so it might be hard to understand. So it’s like you must write the key phrases first to create context. But it’s hard because if you write too much you can’t keep up with what’s being said So you have to pick and choose wisely hmmmm… Does anyone have smart tips on note taking? What do you think is best method? Personally I think when one studies alone outside of lectures it can be good to write notes on paper to practice memorizing (because then you have a lot of time to write) but when you’re listening to a lecture you wanna be quick so it’s better on computer.

You can eat what you want , just in the right portions and be skinny like most models

I am not claiming the existence of physical matter. I don’t know if there is actual physical matter, because all I have access to is my direct experience. But I am speaking of forms and appearances, that’s what I call all these things that arise in my experience. And it seems to us that these forms behave a certain way. I have mentioned it before in this forum, but you’ve probably noticed that every time you drop something, it will land on the floor. Simple example. That is a particular behavior of the form/appearance. Doesn’t mean that it HAS to be that way always, maybe it’s possible for forms to appear differently. But in this particular aspect of reality that is our experience, the forms behave that way. So you could draw conclusion that by studying the form that is the brain, we notice it connects to the formation of our present experience, perhaps makes it possible for us. It’s not anti spirituality, why would the form be excluded from spirituality? Why would the brain be excluded from the spiritual? Studying form is studying your direct experience, which is all you’ve got in this life. Self consciousness/conscious experience is special and unique but it doesn’t mean it’s not connected to form

Deep question. I think it’s becuase there’s so many forms: and there’s a more than zero chance that the form of a body exists. So in all of eternity and infinity, a body will appear. And it’s that particular form which can create self consciousness, it arises from it, and it’s only self consciousness that can ask the question “why do I exist”, so it thinks it’s special, but it’s just a more than zero chance. And since we have infinity, more than zero means infinite bodies….so it’s not special 🙂‍↔️🙂‍↔️

I find the more insecure and fearful you are, the more hostile you perceive people and the world to be.

Good attitude there

Sorry princess my virtual husband can’t stop derailing your thread

I consider mental issues when it makes you or others you interact with suffer.. else it’s acceptable divergence 👽

I’d ask myself if there’s still an authentic emotional, romantic/sexual connection there, it can be there despite differences. Like a resonance between you two. And if it’s fulfilling for you, weighed against how fulfilled you’d be parting ways… Sugarcoat obvious answers part 30

It wasn’t the most precise expression..

When you have any type of concern it’s a sign a self is still there and the “dream” is still intact. Recognize that you’re dreaming

Neurosis could be considered low quality thought. So cleansing yourself of that can make more space for quality ones. Couple that with big curiosity, and one sided focus in a subject helps too, maybe obvious

It could sometimes be overwhelming to tackle all your problems at once. So you might start with what you find most important and work from there. Also be careful with self hate, it can contribute to destructiveness and worsen relationships…

It’s a fine balancing act of maintaining your authenticity around people vs keeping certain things for yourself because it wouldn’t resonate or even weird the other person out. The risk with being too fake is not discovering different sides to people (because some more reserved people might be more likely to open up if you start opening up yourself) and also forming connections based on a social fasade, so missing out on real connections. It can be hard to strike this balance, and it can be hard to get into a flow socially when you’re not tapping into your authenticity. Even if someone doesn’t value the things you value, if they do value learning, curiosity and openness it could mean they’ll be open to learning new perspectives from you. So you can open up new worlds for the right person, if they’re not too rigid in their ways. The thing is some people haven’t even been introduced concepts talked about here, so they just lack knowledge rather than openness. I find judging people often serves the purpose of ego gratification. So if we try to pursue true connection, we wanna reduce that. A judgment might even cloud an accurate image of someone- so watch out for that.

Maybe it’s repressed things coming to the surface

Hahah

I think it’s productive to think about death if it motivates you to try to maximize the happiness in your life and minimize the suffering (sometimes this drive can backfire tho so there’s nuance). Basically using it to set your priorities straight. It could ground you in some way, like appreciate the present alive moment and your body. But if you just get neurotic about it then it’s a waste.