Sugarcoat

I found for myself with social anxiety that its about more than only exposure. You have to be very mindful while you do it, incredibly present with the fear to dissolve it. Basically great self awareness. Notice all the subtle ways you try to avoid facing the fear, such as looking away, being fake in how you talk, tensing up in the body, talking just to talk, basically all your avoidance mechanisms and go against them, by for example forcing yourself to talk when you feel held back, you can even be a bit fake to gain some momentum, holding eye contact even if it feels uncomfortable, relaxing your body, breathing deeper and focusing on breath, actively focusing on the other person. Basically learn all the ways your fear expresses itself in your behavior and actively, mindfully go against it in the moment of it. Sometimes counterintuively though making effort might not be the best thing (depends on the moment) because it can cause additional psychological strain that just adds more overthinking to it all, so there can be times when its more appropriate to not try at all, but just doing what comes naturally (even if its being more quiet) and still observing the fear to help it dissolve, and hopefully you can find that natural flow. Also this is a bit odd but it requires a bit of self dissolution to completely transcend some psychological fears, because youre dealing with a negative idenfication that needs to be dissolved for the fear tied to it to dissolve. To do this requires self attention which is synonymous with self awareness. In my experience

One thing I could suggest is to become genuinely interested in your own reactions (it’s a part of being interested in your own nature overall) So whenever a negative reaction or prejudice arises you have a genuine interest in its nature, and can observe it from a neutral view and analyze it, how it came about, what it is etc. You allow it to arise if it does without suppressing anything. This way you’ll be potentially breaking it down. Understanding that you are a human being and it’s natural to fall for prejudice sometimes, having some compassion for yourself about it, but it can be worked on and dissolved for good. It’s important to be interested in the actual truth of the matter, so that it overrides emotional biased thinking.

Sometimes we engage thoughts because we feel they’re useful somehow in some twisted way, like you feel you gain some weird sense of control over the situation by keeping notice of how others are doing in relation to you and comparing. You have to really see the uselessness of such thoughts and be too concerned with your own shit (working on yourself etc) to waste mental energy comparing yourself

Ok. The reason I asked was if they had noticed any particular differences between the genders (if they had switched)

That’s cool you’ve been able to make observations from it. Sometimes we underestimate the role biology plays in psychology Maybe this is a sensitive question you don’t have to answer this but are you switching genders is that what the hrt is for?

What has it helped you see?

Hehe

@Something Funny ask schizo

I know I still asked

Is that a good or a bad thing

Caloric deficit feels kinda spiritual too for some reason. Like you feel lighter . Maybe it’s not comparable to fasting though.

Once it happened I spontaneously asked myself, where is the I, and for a moment it was like I couldn’t locate myself. I’m not fully sure what that experience was but it felt kinda cool It only happened once though. Nowadays I have a hard time believing something like contemplation could penetrate this self-structure that seems so strong

Intuition in terms of what direction in life to take tends to be connected to what feels expansive for us. So it feels more true because it’s aligned with our newer higher selves vs the old .

The human self is inflammatory and we are full of tension in our entire system because of it, it’s heavy and takes energy to maintain. When you start dissolving and releasing all that tension you’ll start to see your health and energy levels improve. But it’s too weird to talk about.

The answer is obvious

That’s great you’ve realized that. I haven’t.

Maybe it is so

Yea for now it’s just all words for me

If “I” awoke then there wouldn’t be a me there to “not want” it. So it would be all good

I get all of that conceptually but it doesn’t shake this “sense of self” , I dont recognize it for real

Maybe absolutely, but I don’t recognize that. Another way to put it is that my sense of self (and sense of other and reality) feels extremely weak and subtle, and that the connection to myself feels very weak. My thoughts are very quiet and subtle, like the volume on them is low. Ofc when I say this I’m speaking as myself, from myself, from my own connection to myself, it has to be there for me to say “I”. But all of it feels extremely “weak” that’s my experience. Reason being that I went through a lot of self dissolution (but not complete). You can’t know it unless you experience it

The bliss didn’t last for long, but I remember and it was very blissful. I don’t wanna die all the time, like I’m fine right now. But sometimes I wanna die and am kinda depressed, I’d say I’m always just a little bit depressed. The reasons are quite weird so I don’t tend to write about it. But I can say I feel this severe disconnect from myself, kind of like depersonalization Thanks for asking

You can only hate women if you feel you ~need~ something from them

Well that’s why i said it was a basis from HIS side. But he felt it wasn’t reciprocated. Nobody unless they have low self esteem or something would like to give in relationship without getting something in return. The resentment he felt for her tells me he was needy yes. But it’s nonetheless reasonable to expect something back from someone. He could’ve left her if she didn’t meet his standards. Both men and women are conditioned to value romantic relationships and seek partner. How much of that is a biological is hard to say. So power is a more basic need for a man than a woman in his life? Can she be that proof that he has power? You mean they were mirroring each other like he was the insecure needy guy so his mirror would be a more distant cold girl ? As in they’re the same level? Or am I just off the tracks here with guessing what you mean😹😹😹😹 Could be, but we don’t know. Maybe he thought of leaving her but just hadn’t taken action yet. It’s slightly weird though he felt need to analyze why she left if she was so supposedly “cold” and he pulled back isn’t it obvious then. He said he didn’t miss her so maybe he surprised himself on how well he’d do without her Ill stop analyzing his situation it feels a bit odd to do despite him writing a post about it lol I’ll end it here😹

I had a blissful massive shift which was like the dissolution of my mental self, but I don’t know what to call it. Maybe I haven’t awakened but I’ve dissolved myself so much the world lost 99% of its 3D depth now try to beat that one