AndylizedAAY

I have noticed improvement compared to where I was before because my ego has developed. It seems like I am in the limbo phase which is not a bad thing. I predict that I will do more of the spiritual practices and access to more things.

How do I deal with daily nagging concerns on time when it comes to spirituality and work? Btw, the reason I am posting in this category is because I already started topics in the category for serious emotional problems but I am not sure if this topic belongs in that category instead.

@Breakingthewall I think that this a win-win scenario because either I can let go of the fear of what my parents about me or I can let go of a valuable object. I will still learn how to let go better either way. What will probably be my parents fault? How do I become more free without it backfiring? Do you think that my parents will call Leo or other teachers deluded, dangerous, evil, etc. and that I could get grounded if they read the notebook? I agree that I need to break free so I don't want to make any rash decisions.

This is fragmentation at work. Simply making a decision would already be a relief and Teal Swan is right about alignments with these inner parts of myself and that it brings inner peace. I didn't listen to her because of the notebook just because I wanted to know how to do parts work and that my intuition wanted me to know.

@Danioover9000 @Yarco I'm a foreigner in Russia so none of that will work meaning that I can't get a credit card even under parental supervision. Also, online purchases are blocked in Russia because of the Russian-Ukrainian war. What I really need is to understand the consequences if I reveal what I am doing. Will Leo be called a cult leader? A woo woo spiritual teacher? An evil person? Will I still be allowed to have spiritual guidance if I need it? What I really need is to know whether or not it is safe to ask for the life purpose course and the book list. Maybe this won't be necessary by the time the war is over.

Everything feels like a chore, even the spiritual work.

Thanks.

https://youtu.be/lRipeQ_lcN8

@Breakingthewall I still need to learn how to trust myself and my intuition although your feedback is valid.

I feel really dead inside tbh.

I would like to be more in the present moment however.

I know that I can be more detailed but I don't think I can do that right now.

It could be because there are too many or too little decisions that makes people feel dead which gets transferred to the forum. Maybe it's because the forum has been exhausted if all of the good conversations have been taken unless there are always more good things to talk about. That might be miniscule in comparison though.

Is the forum so dead because people don't know anything better to do at the moment?

How corrupted do you think is the forum btw?

@thisintegrated I like that idea, but how will I do that? He's way too ahead of me.

Message deleted.

@Breakingthewall I might lose access to actualized.org even if I need it if they read it. If I can overcome this fear, I will also be able to boldly ask for the life purpose course and the book list instead of waiting until I can purchase them myself.

@ted73104 I could hide the notebook but it is even less likely that the notes will be discovered if I just get rid of them physically and I am looking for advice.

Also, should I edit my notebook or throw it away completely?

Also should I edit my notebook or throw it away completely?

I posted a topic called "Letting Go of Fear and Sentimental Value" but I have trouble doing that which has to do with my notebook, why don't you check it out.

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"Whenever you are committed to comfort and are committed to comfort and are using something as a tool to keep yourself away from risk, to the degree that you are not in alignment with expansion, those things that are serving to keep you comfortable will be targeted." -Teal Swan First of all, I had the intuition to reflect on this quote and then asked, "what would someone who loves themselves do?" (also from Teal Swan) and my answer is to reflect (in general). My intuition has been guiding me to watch certain channels that serve me in some way. This quote is important because it means that I can trust the Universe. However, it is still okay paying for the cost of Enlightenment, whatever that might be. This quote may also be referring to good or bad karma depending on what is being targeted and if the things that serve my comfort are being targeted or not. I think that this is relevant to what will be targeted or not in this situation. I forgot the video of where I got the quote so it will take some time to find it before posting the video.

Listening to Leo a while ago is something I cannot explain but is that just a feeling that is supposed to pass, a state of consciousness that tapping into would help me spiritually or was it a one time transition with turning my life around for something better? Any other alternatives I missed? How do I find out what it was?