spiritual memes

@Breakingthewall yeah I'd like to think my mind can handle it but seeing and reading about this fucked up shit can really fuck with my head. If anything, the spiritual work makes it worse because it gives me more empathy. I can no longer see people as fundamentally separate from me so when I watch an isis beheading video, I can almost feel the persons pain. I also for some reason have a strange compulsion to watch these videos, like i want to be exposed to the darkest parts of reality to see if i can handle it.

@Breakingthewall The whole point is to not try to understand it with your conceptual mind. In a way, you already have it, its the trying to understand it that's obscuring it. Imagine that one day you can't find your glasses so you spend the entire day looking everywhere for then but to no avail so your give up. Suddenly you realise that you were wearing your glasses the whole time.

I don't think its a distortion. Just something so obvious and meta that language doesn't exist to describe it. It's not dark at all, its not a joke in a bad sense. Just a very funny sense.

Meditation, shadow work and IFS therapy

I literally cannot put it into words. And tbh It's been a while since I did a high dose of LSD so its kind of faded. Its not as emotionally intense as a god realization and its possible to have one without the other. Its more of a meta awakening while god realization is more of a deep awakening. A big tip is to not try to understand it. The very act of trying to understand it is what prevents you from accessing it.

And then after the ecstasy you calm down and you think for a bit and then BOOM, you get the joke and you start laughing.

If its not funny, you probably haven't realized it. All of existence is designed to be a huge divine practical joke you are playing on yourself. Its a joke of such infinite genius yet also really stupid at the same time due to how unbelievably meta it is. Once you realise it, you'll be like LOLLLLLLLLL it was right in front of me, why didn't I realise????? XD. The God realization awakening is when you realise the mechanics of how reality works. Since reality is infinitely complex, god realization is infinitely deep. Keep watching Leo and he'll keep being like 'I just had a deeper awakening that surpasses all my previous awakening'. But reality is one big joke and the meta awakening is when you realize the punchline. But both the setup and the punchline are so meta they can't be expressed in language. And the joke its fucking hilarious.

Don't listen to these salty mofos telling you you're not awake. There's multiple types of awakening and they're so busy chasing the god realization one while missing out on the meta one that you just had. The best awakening is the one that is so meta you cannot put it into words. And when you reach it, you laugh for hours because its the funniest shit in existence. Like it was right in front of you the whole time but you were too busy looking somewhere else.

I've also experience a lot of childhood abuse (but not sexual) and it absolutely affects my dating life. Until you sort out your childhood traumas, dating and game will be an uphill battle.

this song was actually a banger back in the day

@Jannes exactly

what happens if one of his children comes out as gay or decides they don't want to be christian?

Damn, theres parts of me that are trying really hard to distract me from doing more IFS therapy. I'm feeling a strong aversion to doing any more parts work

damn this is amazing. I studied optimization in some uni courses but I never thought of it this way

I think the best second order truths act as pointers to the first order

I've noticed that my protector parts tend to be located in the upper chakras whereas my exiles are located in my lower chakras

If you're genuinely interested in the things you want to learn, you will naturally learn it insanely quickly.

Actually stage blue systems are very stable which is why stage blue societies and traditions last so long.

Trauma healing involves extensive therapy, and inner shadow work. As of now the best form of therapy I've found is IFS. Basic self help is just sorting out your survival needs like health, money, career, relationships etc.

@Tyler Robinson The most important aspect of blue is keeping stage red at bay. Stage blue is what stops a drug cartel from killing your family, selling you into slavery.

maybe it has been...

both, tbh. Call me a gaslighter if you want but you cray cray. If you have a dysfunctional mind, it will corrupt any spiritual work that you do so I (and most people) would recommend healing from your childhood traumas first. If you want to be objective, and 'scientific' the only reality to things is a bunch of vibrating quantum fields. Its your mind that divides these quantum fields into 'things'. Quantum fields are neither good nor bad, why are you so mad? If you want to be spiritual about it then we do create are own realities lol.

This is what happens when you get too deep into spirituality without doing the necessary trauma healing and basic self help first.

@Ulax yeah good luck to you too!