Harlen Kelly

@The Mystical Man

@Dlavjr Treat the thoughts about shame and how awful you were that arise as objects in consciousness, without attaching any special importance to the thoughts. The problem is not the shameful thoughts, the problem is your attachment to those thoughts, you are getting lost in the content of your mind. Just observe, and that's about it.

@Shiva99 You didn't close her and she wanted to be closed. When a woman gives you green lights to escalate physically and you don't, that is a HUGE turn off.

@The Mystical Man Have you considered the possibility that the reason why you got attracted to the idea of sexual repression was a neurotic overreaction because of your inability to attract the opposite sex? There is nothing sophisticated, advanced or conscious about nofap.

@Mellocean Hyper religious/dogmatic people tend to shame and repress sexuality, out of all the good qualities of your average fundamentalist, why would you adopt their repressive attitude towards sex? Do you think that the guy who is successful with the opposite sex is doing mental jerk-offs about no fap?

@CBN You might get banned if you link sites like that.

@Daniel Lopez Bro just get you a girl that is willing to step on your face, there are plenty of gals willing to do that!

@Jacob Morres You are looking for a fantasy and romanticizing attraction too much.

@StarStruck It's not a big deal dude, there are literally hundreds of millions of women. You can try to visualize your life from her point of view if you want to become more empathetic to her experience. What would you do if you were constantly getting approached by random dudes ALL the time? That's the reality of the average attractive woman. Don't take it personally, don't form any personal beliefs about it, simply continue meeting more women.

@Lyubov Which are those ''hacks''? Waiting around and expecting women to fall from the sky? You have to talk to women to attract women, whichever methodology you use is not really that important. At the end of the day, whether it is through social circle, cold approach, apps, you MUST talk to women to attract women.

Welcome to the brutal reality of dating and relationship dynamics. Keep in mind that men and women are equally selfish when relating with each other. Be weary of not developing hate for women, that is very toxic and will only cause you suffering. Women care about two things primarily when the first meet you: Fun and Confidence. Not how good of a person, hardworking, generous you are. She might take that into consideration AFTER she is already attracted and is considering a relationship. She will respond to the guy that can stimulate her emotions the most.

What women say they are attracted to is a fantastical, juvenile image of a generous man, but as you have observed but they are ACTUALLY attracted to is the exact opposite. Critical thinking skills and discernment must be applied to objectively determine what elicits attraction. No need to have animosity towards women for being attracted to a certain behavioral pattern, that will only lower the quality of your life. Simply observe what they are attracted to and consciously and responsibly embody those qualities.

@Etherial Cat His main issue is that he is too much of a nice guy, your advise will not help him. No need to turn into a full-blown douchebag, but understanding and internalizing some of those qualities might be necessary for him to elicit attraction. For you to have an ''intimate relationship'', you need to be attractive first.

@StarStruck Because even though what really turns her on is the high-value quasi sociopathic guy, she knows very well she will get played and dumped eventually by him so she settles with the nice guy provider type. Don't give it too much thought and make sure you don't develop animosity towards women because of this fact. Getting angry at a cat for mowing makes no sense because cats are supposed to mow, analogously, getting mad at women for being attracted to a certain personality type makes no sense because that won't change anytime soon. By the way, make sure to seize that opportunity. You can have a good time with her without necessarily marrying or ''providing'' for her.

@Rishabh R You can choose from the remaining 3.5 billion women.

@mmKay Hahahaha! Nice realization man! Seriously though, imagine how terrified is a very beautiful woman who derives her sense of self primarily from her appearance of the fact that after 35 her looks will inevitably wither away dramatically? It's equivalent to the fear that a rich person has of losing their wealth, the only difference being that everybody will eventually age. And as you mentioned the fear of rape, etc...

@Clarity808 He is a typical nice guy but you (and the vast majority of women) are not attracted to nice guys. If you have any respect and genuine affection for him, leave the relationship. You will absolutely destroy him when you eventually decide to leave him later after he gets more attached to you. Unfortunately women have a fantastical picture in their mind of who they are attracted to but in reality what elicits attraction on them is the exact opposite. Just leave him and look for guy you really like.

@TheDao Do you agree with the statement that women have been oppressed for most of human history and are currently systematically oppressed in most countries or are you just a typical, mindless reactionary?

@Hardkill You are thinking too much and I am sure as hell you are not talking enough action. Mental jerk-offs don't produce results.

@Seven7 As I said the last time, if you don't solve your attachment and neediness issues and your desires to use others as emotional crutches, this will become a recurring theme in your life. It will happen to you again, again and again unless of course you focus on the root of the issue.

Take it easy bro, you ain't going to die. Watch this video from Leo https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l96TZeZGlDg I would recommend you to not get involved in another relationship for at least a couple of months. You alienated her and were acting distant, but as soon as she broke it off, that triggered a lot of emotional pain and anguish on you. You need to work on your emotional attachments and change your mindset on relationships, otherwise this will continue to happen to you again, and again, and again. As long as you ''need'' a relationship or a person, first you won't really ever love that person unconditionally and second you will create unnecessary pain for you and that person. So stay off relationships for now, evolve your mentality in regards to relationships and watch the video I linked. And last but not least, there is no such a thing as ''the one''. That is an incredibly childish and juvenile notion. Unwire that belief. If you develop yourself and open yourself to unconditional love, you would never try to selfishly use another person as an emotional crutch, and therefore, you won't get attached. So work towards unconditional Love (which will enrich your relationships), instead of egoic, limited, dissatisfactory love (which is not even love). After you watch the first video, watch this from Rubert Spira https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X7OwLAONIm8. You need to get this through your skull, otherwise this will become a recurring theme in your life.

@Emerald You should study what a prescriptive and a descriptive argument is. You are conflating and bastardizing these two concepts. By the way, it is not ''an incomplete or distorted view of feminine sexual attraction dynamics'', it's what the overwhelming majority of females are attracted and respond to. Being in denial about what attracts the sexes is as irrational and illogical as getting angry at a dog because it barks, dogs are supposed to bark. The ''impressionable men'' as you call them would be in jeopardy if they assume what you are saying is true, because they will end up not attracting women. They should understand what attracts women and be responsible about the embodiment of those qualities.

@Peter Miklis In all fairness, doing that (even though it is not remotely the best strategy) would work better than what the typical clueless nice guy does. She at least will have a reaction to the ''Hey bitch, what's up?'', but she won't even notice the stereotypical nice guy or would find him repulsive.

@integral If you ask those women that threw themselves at him if they liked assholes, they would say no. It's pure delusion and unconsciousness.

@Emerald You make too many inferences from what people say which is just pure projection and delusion. Don't make assumptions or extrapolations unless it is explicitly stated. Leo, believe it or not, is advocating for exactly what you just described. Why can you not see this? Because your mind automatically assigns qualities and makes assumptions about the other person's point of view. At one point you assumed I was glorifying untamed masculinity when I clearly was making descriptive arguments, not prescriptive ones. Why? Because you immediately and unconsciously extrapolated negative assumptions about my argument. Notice that pattern.