Federico del pueblo

I think it depends a bit on the environment. But basically you just spit out a lot of random stuff, nothing too serious, neither too committed. For the most part just a few words while you're walking past some people/one person, like "Hey, what's up?" "What's good?" "Hey man, how doing => bro fist" "Cool shirt, my man" "cheers => clink glasses" And it's more like you keep slowly walking and only if someone seems really responsive you might add something to it or they say something back so you sort of get pulled back in the conversation when you had already almost walked past them. Then maybe a few more things where you have to actively walk to them, like "Hey, I heard this is the spot where the coolest people always meet, is this you tonight? :)" "What's the best drink here?" "Hi guys, you seemed like cool people, so I wanted come by for a second, how you're all doing? Good? Awesome! You all local people? Nice! It's my first time here in this night club, yeah I kinda like it...blablablabla" Remember it's more about the energy than whether what you say makes a lot of sense, you must seem like you've been talking to people for the last 200 years, completely normal for you. And nothing is too silly or random, everything is good enough, at least in high energy crazy venues, not when you're at the Oscars (sure people can always find you weird, but it doesn't matter). "Hey guys, man you wouldn't believe me what kind of an amazing salad I made myself today, like I cut some cucumber and tomatoes and the sauce was with olive oil and lemon juice, so damn good!" And then you just keep shit talking and hold the frame no matter what. "Why do you tell us this random stuff?" => "Because the salad was so damn good! Don't be envious, I might make one for you if we ever get along" Just a lot of bullshit.

Maybe instead of changing your course in university to business you could have traveled for some time. Some guys travel even if they don't have a lot of money. They just travel and work, some time only work, then some traveling, then some work and some travel. And like this they visit a lot of countries and come back completely changed. Just in case you've never considered this as an option ?

Ok, we're talking about India, right? Would be interesting to see what other Indians say about this. Like is it really that bad that no guy gets laid outside of marriage? But if it really is like this then yeah, obviously you'll have to get married. But even if that is the case you still should seek to become as attractive as possible. I guess even if you need marriage for sex you probably typically first find a girl that becomes your girlfriend and then you marry her or not? Or is it more like the family of the girl chooses which man she's gonna marry?

Ehm, you go out and meet women?! Become good at attracting women and then the sex will come. And have you heard of girlfriends? Those are beings with whom you can have a cool arrangement. Like you keep seeing them and do stuff with them. Also you you can have sex with them. You don't need to marry them if you don't to, but you could at some point Work in your neediness, your attraction skills, your confidence, other life goals, your physique (work out), and like this you take care of all of your issues.

I think you need two things: - learning how to assert yourself in a socially acceptable way - some way of releasing the destructive emotions that were caused by these events and the people involved When it comes to the self assertion it doesn't have to be very complicated. Someone talks to you in a way that seems disrespectful to you, then you pretty much simply tell that person exactly that. "The way you're talking to me makes me feel disrespected" "Excuse me, but I feel like you're talking to me as though you're above me" When you attempt to do that you might encounter more unhelpful emotions like a fear of speaking up, maybe more anger if the person doesn't acknowledge your "complaint". So it remains important that you also know how to not get triggered so much anymore, because even if you can assert yourself you could then later still have angry thoughts that will suck your energy out of you and make you bitter over time. That's why I think a technique to release destructive emotions is hugely important here. I think I've mentioned before that I use EFT/tapping for these purposes, but I'd like to elaborate on this technique a little bit more in this post. The reason why I think that EFT could be very helpful to deal with these types of thoughts/emotions is that you could use exactly the way of thinking that usually triggers you WHILE doing the technique on them and this will over time unwire these patterns in your brain. Your anger is an habituated emotion that gets triggered by specific thoughts or events. You have neural networks in your brain where all of your anger issues are stored and once you get triggered these networks activate and start to fire. Then you feel angry/pissed/upset and get stuck in a anger loop because these emotions will drive more angry thoughts which in turn lead to more anger (your body is full of adrenaline and other stress hormones at this point). BUT if you have these angry thoughts/emotions and then you do the tapping while still engaging in angry thoughts something interesting happens: Your brain receives a "anger signal" due to the event or thoughts and at the same time it receives a "calm/relaxed" signal due to the tapping (because the tapping has a calming effect on the amygdala = your fight or flight structure in your brain). So now your brain receives the feedback that the level of anger it tried produce in response to your thoughts couldn't be reached and that therefore the event doesn't have to be "considered" quite as anger inducing as it originally was stored in your brain. So now your brain uses its neuroplasticity to make that neural network that corresponds with your anger issue less thick/less dense/smaller, i.e. you have less neural connections that can be used to trigger that kind of anger and thus your anger response the next time will be weaker. If you repeat the process more often at some point this neural network will have become tiny and the issue doesn't bother you anymore, then if something that would originally trigger anger happens you can easily think it away like "ah, I don't give a fuck, let's just move on" or whatever. You could still have other triggers of the same emotion (anger) and if so you probably need to use the technique on these others triggers too, but the more of your anger you've unwired the weaker the remaining triggers will become. About 6 months ago I was still horribly pissed about many things, by now there are few things left that can trigger anger in me, and if I do get triggered it's like 5 times less intense. Hope this helps ?

That's exactly what attraction theory would suggest and it's the reason why "acting cocky" is one of the recommended behaviours. If you are cocky you are very confident, on the edge of what is still tolerable. It's polarising. It takes something to act cocky whereas acting shy or insecure doesn't take anything. If someone can consistently act cocky, even in spite of resistance (when the cockiness is being called out), this person must be strong. Cockiness could be seen as an indicator of strength. Strength leads to attraction. If a man can act cocky around a woman this might indicate that he's been able to act cocky around other women in the past and got away with it (otherwise he wouldn't have been able to maintain this behaviour and would have crumbled at some point). So it creates the perception of a guy who is good with women with leads to attraction.

Exactly. Elon is gonna have his office in the big tower to the right. Folks like us will have to live in these smaller bungalows ?

Yes! Those are some creepy faces ? I made some more too.

I don't imagine the universe to be finite like a room (but I also just have no fucking idea, really :), I just meant that maybe the space "occupied by matter" might be finite, but always expanding in all directions and that at some point after the last planet or stardust or whatever (the one that is the farthest away from "us") there might just be endless space or nothingness that continues infinitely in which the matter could then expand. But that's probably just plain wrong ?

Then what is my mind imagining the universe to be expanding into? ? Btw, the thread didn't die the moment Leo explained it all, because you imagined the thread to continue, it's that simple ?

If I offered you 10.000$ to try to just talk to a group in a bar, would you be willing to risk it? If so, what do you think would happen, with wich likelihood? (Worst case/best case) I don't know where you live, but where I live (Germany, which has this stereotype of people having a stick up their asses), I could definitely think of bars that kinda lean a little bit towards a club, but not as loud music, with fairly high energy and people being all fairly close to each other so that it's not like you have to walk 20 ft from one group/place to another group. And yeah, it's not like people look like they're bagging you to talk to them either, but possible. But who knows, maybe where you live it's different.

@Someone here If you want to look at this from a physical pov probably both of us don't really have sufficient physical education to wrap our minds about this stuff... I mean, time, space and matter are so interconnected that we probably can't even imagine what could be outside of the "space" that contains the physical universe. Wikipedia says: "The expansion of the universe is the increase in distance between any two given gravitationally unbound parts of the observable universe with time.[1] It is an intrinsic expansion whereby the scale of space itself changes. The universe does not expand "into" anything and does not require space to exist "outside" it. This expansion involves neither space nor objects in space "moving" in a traditional sense, but rather it is the metric (which governs the size and geometry of spacetime itself) that changes in scale. As the spatial part of the universe's spacetime metric increases in scale, objects become more distant from one another at ever-increasing speeds. To any observer in the universe, it appears that all of space is expanding, and that all but the nearest galaxies (which are bound by gravity) recede at speeds that are proportional to their distance from the observer. While objects within space cannot travel faster than light, this limitation does not apply to the effects of changes in the metric itself.[notes 1] Objects that recede beyond the cosmic event horizon will eventually become unobservable, as no new light from them will be capable of overcoming the universe's expansion, limiting the size of our observable universe." So maybe there isn't even space where there is no matter?! I don't know ?

@Karmadhi I don't know...now it sounds like you don't feel clubs, but you also don't feel daygame. But you know...night game and daygame are simply the best options unless you have some hobbies where you're almost guaranteed to meet girls frequently, like living close to the beach being a surf dude or so. Why do you not go to bars instead of clubs? Bars are definitely more quiet than clubs and are basically built for people to talk to each other. Yes, you still have to talk loudly enough there, but it's ok. Getting good with girls is a lot about getting good with people in general. You can't just skip the socializing. You won't find places where a docen of hot girls is lined up for you to talk to them (in a chill laid back environment ?). So this way or another you'll have to do things that are awkward to get girls. In night game you must engage the entire group and spend considerable time with all of them, and if you're good and the friends like you, then maybe isolation is possible. In daygame you have to deal with the awkwardness of approaching in more silent environments where other people might overhear you talking to her. If that wasn't the case, daygame would be easy and everybody would do it, but because it is hard, nobody does it, so if you get good at it, you win. You can only gradually desensitize yourself to the awkwardness, by doing social challenges, structured in a progressive way, so each challenge is a bit uncomfortable, but doable. Also forget about the "I'm a natural introvert" thing. Everybody who wants to start with game thinks that. It's just another limiting belief EVEN if true. Your brain is plastic. You can change. If you do the right things you could become someone who regularly speaks in front of a several thousands people audience, as the natural introvert. For the library: draw a tic tac toe game on a shit of paper already with your first X written somewhere and write "you won't have any chance :)" on it, then beat her at the game, then start convo

@Someone here Ok, I don't know where you find your porn. And what do you mean by boring? Of course you'll see a penis sliding in and out of a woman and of course there's gonna be a close up of the penetration a lot of the time. Guys typically want to see the "fucking", not the love and intimacy. But then again what to you mean by intimacy? Is it when they're kissing and looking themselves in the eyes etc? There are definitely porn sites (and free stuff from these sites on Pornhub etc.) where the sex is more intimate/passionate/slow etc. I don't really watch porn anymore but I think I remember things like passion HD (or so), babes, Vixen (mixture of passionate/dirty but with style) etc. Just search until you know a few of these sites.

I don't know... aren't you exaggerating a little bit? Actually porn simply shows more of a specific type of sex, which is the more aggressive, man being dominant, dirty/kinky and hard fucking style of sex. And whilst I agree that not all real life sex is like that, if you make enough experiences with girls you'll definitely also have that kind of sex, unless you seem very shy/inexperienced/unconfident because then women don't get the vibes from you to want that kind of sex. I'll tell you something: a lot of women want dirty sex and kinky sex; like spanking ass, pulling her hair, dirty talking etc., they'll yell at you to fuck them hard and all kinds of things, they also want to fulfill some dark fantasies and desires, but for this you must be open and willing to give her permission to do these things. Now of course women also want romantic and passionate or flowery and lovely love-making kind of sex with cute kisses and eye contact and saying nice things etc, but definitely not exclusively, at least not for most women. So just explore everything, don't judge one kind of sex, it's all hot and fun.

How do you like the "Creepy Incel"? ?

Haha, I so wouldn't want to be in that cheese factory ? But it captured the vibe really well.

Wow, I love this! Edit: don't know why the names disappeared... So 1.) Infinite Library 2.) Colombian Beach 3.) Terrible Dream

I think you should check out a game called "Minecraft". I heard it's good!

Only if they manage to be a good team. They should've won the Euro too, but then Switzerland was too much for them. They have the best individual players, let's see if they can take advantage of it this time ? Edit: I'm referring to France, not England.

@itachi uchiha Have you watched the Euro 2021? Italy didn't park the bus, they were actually good at attacking.

@Fernanda For personal development purposes I would suggest that a belief is a thought which's content you believe to be true. Like you might have the belief "I'm a Brazilian girl". Typically a belief has a corresponding emotion, which makes you feel like the belief is true. This is what makes limiting beliefs so challenging. Sure you can choose to think another thought that differs from your limiting belief, but it will feel like you're lying to yourself whereas thinking your limiting belief will feel like you're thinking the truth.

It's kind of complicated for guys though. The thing that you appreciate is what can make you lose another girl, at least if too much care is shown. I think the girls who are the least open to casual sex are the ones who want the most care and then typically they also desire commitment at some point. So reversely the girls who are totally cool with casual sex might get turned off by too much care because to them care signals willingness for commitment which they aren't looking for. Guys have to get a feeling for which girl needs what, but that's not easy. I don't recommend seeing anyone as an object. I think you should simply see any woman, including the ones you're having sex with, as a grown up, self responsible person, that "should not" need you in order to be happy. Consequently, she shouldn't need frequent messages from you to be fulfilled or feel appreciated or anything like that. Just two adults that repeatedly want to spend some quality time together without a lot of additional duties. This doesn't mean you have to be careless altogether, you can still send a "hey, had a great evening with you, take care, we'll talk soon :)" or so. But if you're repeatedly sending messages back and forth then you're basically a couple that doesn't share the same flat. She does not NEED you (and you shouldn't NEED her for your happiness either), but when you're together you're both appreciating each other and taking care of each other (to some extent) for the time spent together.

@Someone here I also think that masturbation can even help you to improve the real sex. Because the brain can't perfectly distinguish between real and imagined events if you visualize sexual acts while fapping you basically create positive sexual memories/experiences in your brain without having had sex.

Normally yes. But I do not know if there are special cases where it might be detrimental. I think masturbation has a lot of the benefits that are also associated with sex, like reduction of stress and maybe even positive effects on the immune system.