SM-OConnor

Extreme sadness, loneliness, and existential dread. These seem to be the results of my psychedelic trips and introspection. I understand I am God, and this reality is my own manifestation. During the peak of my trips I even felt the extraordinary bliss and pleasure of it. Yet, I cannot help but be haunted by the very dark implications of being utterly alone... and accepting that everything and everyone I ever loved are just figments of my imagination. Some guidance on how to deal with this, would be very much appreciated. My sincere thanks.

Thank you for the thoughtful responses. Tulpamancy looks interesting. I had no idea that was a thing. On some of my trips, entities would communicate with me. They felt more like additional streams of consciousness inside my own mind more than external beings. Might be a good starting point. This is quite overwhelming, and I am struggling to process it. Perhaps I just need some time. Ego reaction is likely the case, but damn I don't know how to let it go. I feel like all of my comprehension is torn apart, and nothing makes sense any longer. Surrendering the ego during the come up on a trip is easy, but not so much during the aftermath for me. As Inliytened1 said, I think being in that transitional state between God and human is challenging. Probably worth mentioning, I trip completely alone in the dark. As someone with Asperger's Syndrome, it's always been difficult to make friends. There is no one in my life I can speak to about such matters. This I imagine is even a problem for many other enlightenment seekers with large social circles. Simply engaging with all of you here has helped with the feeling of loneliness, so I thank you for that.