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  1. One of older favorites: Current one:
  2. Music is a really strong tool. A friend forwarded this to me via a DMT related forum - it is highly peculiar. I used the Bandcamp link.
  3. Abandon fear and you'll be fine... Being torn apart, reconstructed, etc. is not a bad thing... always remember - I took a substance, this shall pass in 10 minutes and breathe. When you go beyond fear, even the difficult experience can become useful or even pleasant. Also it sounds like "hyper-slap" - you were probably doing it too often... continue that way and you might end up in even more difficult situations that will teach you thinks, but not in a pleasant way. Insectoid aliens are a thing - I don't know what - not negative in my book, just very tangible and "real"...
  4. That's what I mean... Even if we are... we are not. While we are alive, embodied, filtered out - we are part of "God" or call this Everything whatever label you want, but we are not IT. We don't possess its "powers"... it's like a molecule becoming aware that it's a molecule maybe? Even if we are really... we still exist separately with some kind of reason, agenda to do here... whatever it is... Don't get me completely wrong - I am also amazed that psychedelics work at all like they do... That there are certain compunds that in microscopic amounts react in such a way with our nervous system... This is astonishing... And the complexity of it all... I just wonder how to keep more of it "real"... To use it in everyday life a bit more. I guess I wish to bring more back from the hyperspace... for regular others who don't partake in this orgy of the mind. You know, it is fascinating that there are also things called art, culture, technology that people explore and construct. There seems to be this whole layer of intricately simulated reality that is somehow superimposed on all this... There is obviously some need or idea to have these biological systems evolving, procreating... I don't see a way to reconcile all of this just yet. Some good ideas thrown around here, too. Also some weird ones. But hey - that's this fucked up reality.
  5. I think this forum is as good as any place to ask that question. In some very deep states / trances / psychedelic trips you can get very "smart" - everything is known to you, you UNDERSTAND it all, you ARE everything, some say - they are GOD, etc. You are above the "game", you see through, there are no problems, nothing to worry about, just love and the ineffable (which is known while the experience lasts) infinite. But when we return we don't keep that. We don't remain super smart, we cannot just learn any language we want in an instant, we don't suddenly start playing instruments at high level or develop AI code for Deep Mind, etc. and we even forget most of the feelings and knowledge we had during the trip. Yet we KNEW while in the trip and maybe even managed to keep a bit of that insight or at least the FEELING of it. Maybe the latter is confusing - because I see people claiming all sorts of things - but they are still just "ordinary" people, even if they had an insight beyond the conceptual mind. Yet they still write on forums, do the same old jobs, possess the same skills as before... maybe a little bit changes and the FEELING, but not the actual content of the mind/body's skills/content. As I see it - if you have such an experience - it can amplify what is already there from the consensus reality - if you are a chemist you might discover some new compound, if you are physicist, you might develop a new breakthrough theory, if you are an accomplished composer you might write a specially inspiring composition, etc., but if you can't achieve skills you didn't work on in the ordinary reality, even if it feels you did while in the trip. Also the sense of being omniscient or even exceptionally intelligent or insightful seems a bit illusory - it works while in the experience, you know things, you understand reality, but when you come back, you have this vague sense of oneness, the void - when you read Zen ideas you know what they meant, but I can't choose to suddenly speak Mandarin or Arabic or run 100m in 8 sec. or play the violin like Paganini. A lot of people also met alien entities in NN-DMT trances (myself included), but we only got a "hello, we exist" or some very vague and abstract ideas - no one came back with a blueprint for some alien technology, or learned something they couldn't have known themselves, etc. What are your thoughts on the realness of those "intelligence" increasing experiences and how do you keep more of it after the psychedelic session? I only managed to enhance some things in my field, I got better in some interesting ways at my work - which is great and I am thankful for it, I also lost any fear of death, but I can't keep the knowledge I supposedly have while in the "enlightened" state. I can't influence the fabric of reality much more than before. (I am OK with this, just wonder how others do and how to tell delusions from the actual working stuff)
  6. Look into the "saviour complex"... And work on it if you recognize it... First step - realise you are not here to change and help all the people, but explore and co-exist... And yes - as one friend once said upon meeting my then girlfriend - "Ah, a bit neurotic, huh, good sex, right?" It is true - edgy, wild, a bit "crazy", etc. is very attractive to some of us - but you can find that appeal mixed with some balance included, too. I have a couple of good friends who really suffered because they got involved with very sexy girls with too much troubles - usually stemming from childhood abuse, etc. Rather informative articles: For me it took an especially devastating experience with a lot of "life and death" situations with a particular girl that probably had borderline personality disorder, but was sexy and horny as hell, liked wild sexual practices, was very imaginative, creative, into witchcraft and psychedelics... Sort of Teal Swan kind of girl, very smart, sexy, but messed up completely deep within. The ups and downs were monstrous... After experiencing this I think I had my share of "wild girls" for this life-time. Don't push against this attraction, acknowledge it, but put your focus elsewhere... don't connect with such persons if you feel the burden of interaction... if it becomes messy... it is very difficult to get out of such a relationship if you are not strong enough. Amazing kinky sex is not worth all the torture or even crime, death or emotional suffering. You can get sucked into a weird vortex. Stay away! Also don't take things personally. Realise that ups and downs are her condition, that it has nothing to do with the reality. Stay balanced. It can ruin a man, I have seen it with a few friends and almost experienced it myself - got out at the last moment. Find balance, rather be single, have affairs, casual sex - one night stands if you have to, but don't go deeper into relationships with such persons. It can literally kill you. There are "normal" girls who are interesting and easy to be around and healthy to co-exist with. If you have realised this focus is not OK, you are already on the path to liberate yourself from that fixation. You don't owe anything to anyone. You are not here to save them, even if you had great moments with them in the past. Recognize the traits, stay away, even if you start fantasizing about having sex with them. Shift focus. Don't establish communication. It can escalate quickly.
  7. Flirting and dating is not rocket science... it's an art, a game, also - communication. Presenting yourself in a good light is not dishonesty, except if you really pretend to be something you are not - then you will blow it all eventually, anyway. Honesty is really liberating, I don't know how you all define it, but if you have no need to hide your opinion, your demeanour, your background - if you are transparent to yourself first - then there is no need to be dishonest and manipulative... That also doesn't mean you have to be awkward, insulting, vulgar, etc. If you feel "I am horny and I want to fuck you!" - this is not something you need to communicate in that manner... You can hint at it, show it, flirt more obviously, don't pretend you want to hold her hand and smell the roses together... but saying to a girl - "You sexy, me wanna fuck!" is not honesty, it's stupidity. Chill guys, be comfortable with yourselves and you will have more success in getting sexual or relationship partners. It helps if you look half-decent, but even so - you would be surprised what a bit of humour, relaxed and easy going attitude can do. Most girls want to feel amused, safe/comfortable and admired. If they get nervous, uncomfortable and bored in your company - then you have to worry about other stuff than honesty... Honesty is a good trait - don't confuse it with stupidity or saying out loud anything that comes of the top of your head. Filtering out what you communicate with others is decency and tact, not dishonesty... I can think very conflicting thoughts and choose what to say to a person. Not with a wish to manipulate, but to have an appropriate communication. Communication is art, too. Real dis-honesty burdens you, can make you nervous, insecure and always careful to remain "in the act", "in the character", unless you're not a psychopath who can believe their own bullshit... If you have to hide things it will eventually show, it will make you and your (potential) partners nervous, suspicious and not at ease in the situation.
  8. This is a very important advice. ? I got intrigued to join here by some videos - 2c-b and 5meo respectively - the first one I really liked - had to suspend my initial gut reaction and prejudices to make it through the intro part, but the story and insights got good till the end. I had mixed feelings over 5meo video... I can understand where the criticism comes from - the less tolerant, more ego driven people, who share similar reaction. But don't let any affects in. It drains you. It did seem a bit megalomaniac to me, too, but I let it be... I only felt - man, you're not alone, many share that experience, many don't talk in such terms, though. I could see many people would get good advice and life changing ideas from Leo's videos but also many will be confused, misguided or lost... like in any system. Some get crazy from yoga... ? I feel even more like that about Teal Swan - she had revelations while not yet resolving her issues, and she can deeply disturb more feeble followers or seekers who stumble upon her ideas and videos. She can lead into "darkness" and insanity, but also help. I feel similar about some of what I read and watched here. So this answer is a really good one, for anyone confused. When we go deeper, there is a thin line to "insanity", delusion and getting lost in the utter weirdness that everything is. First stay firmly on the ground, balanced, strong, fearless, then take the plunge into the abyss... Also be transparent, honest and don't cling to affects... don't attach to fighting for any idea, just observe the interaction and explore...
  9. ? I am not Jodorowsky if you thought that. Thanks for the best vibes from Spain anyway! ✌ Yes, I like combinations over single style, also the retentions are important. You might be interested in Tibetan Tsa Lung practice, too...
  10. You describe Ujjayi pranayama - deep "noisy" inhale and exhale... Yes, it is deeply relaxing and focusing...
  11. 13 ujjayi 42 Bhastrika Breathold on inhale, "vase" lock 69 Wim Hof Breaths Breathold on exhale Deep inhale , 15 sec. breath hold relax and.slowly begin another Ujjayi round REPEAT the whole sequence as desired and how capable/comfortble you are... 3 times at least... (ca. 20-30 minutes, more than that repetitions for "psychedelic" intensity ?) You're wellcome! P.S. You can find technique explanations on youtube... This routine, though... just check it out...
  12. I guess it is a bit difficult to tell around here. ??
  13. I only had limited experience with polyamory... I was in a situation when I really felt free and happy with what I became in life and this fulfilment of mine seemed to attract women, too. My libido was sky high and one particular sensual girl opened up what I could only describe as "tantric" sex. No special rituals or anything, just intuitive, out of this world love-making, seeing things, "getting high" from sex, feeling energy flowing, connecting, her having very long (like 10 minutes and more of whole body shaking and twisting) orgasms, I had whole body orgasms, sort of "energetic" ones, etc. We also really felt connected and at ease with each other. A very deep and respectful interaction was going on. I tried to make sense of it all and found it all written in books on Daoist, Tantric, Sex Magick and similar sex practices, but there they mentioned practices and exercises to achieve that, while we somehow tapped into it intuitively. I also had zero need to "possess" her, no jealousy, she also expressed her wish to experiment with another female friend of hers, she was attracted to one of her old friends, who was gay, but she thought they could have sex anyway... and I encouraged her to be free, to experience it all, it takes nothing away from what we had... but - when I look back - I was not really in love with her - not deeply - I loved her as a very good friend, I was attracted to her sexually, but never imagined us becoming a monogamous "couple"... Yet the feeling of the moment was really liberating - like we could experience whatever we want, respect and love each other and everyone involved - it was very fresh and special. We had a few months of out of this world romance, also some "ritualistic magic" sex ordeals with some cannabis edibles, psilocybe mushrooms and not leaving the house for the whole weekends, only having crazy sex for several hours through the days and night, some resting, sleep and sex again, mutual bathing, food, wine, psychedelic journeys, music... all merging into one incredible sensual journey beyond reason, morality, shame, prejudices, where everything was allowed, everything tried out, us being completely open, transparent in our desires to each other, completely unhinged lust, even transforming into animals in visions - making love like a lion and lioness, making love as Shiva (archetype?), experiencing complete surrender, flow, sexual organs were shape-shifting into different forms and ways of connection - like my penis was "travelling" inside her body energetically, becoming longer, thicker, filling her deep, then becoming leaner and snake-like moving through her, triggering intense sensations of pleasure, bodies merging into one another ... all of that even increased that "tantric" kind of experience. It was not just sex, it was "witchcraft" and I really wish everyone alive can experience that. There's so much more possible in lovemaking than the ordinary sex. But there came the time when she had to go to Berlin and I had to go to have some workshops and lectures with other people and we were separated for a while. I was still in that special energy - feeling completely free and open, everything allowed, no jealousy, no possessiveness, I even joked with her on email if she managed to have sex with her female crush and how was it... and I genuinely wished that she had and that she experienced that. But she only wrote to me about how she misses me and about the plans where to go on holidays together, which I was looking forward to, also. While I was with other people there was one particularly nice friend, and as open as I was, she became attracted to me and I felt desire for her. It felt so innocent, so pure, nothing bad meant for anyone, only passion unhinged. We kissed almost by accident one day, the tension becoming too high and we had a wild "affair" in the hotel, the room was shared with some other attendees of the seminar we were at, so we even sneaked onto a balcony at night to have sex, once also got "caught" by one friend, who just left the balcony and we were so lustful that we continued "fucking", knowing she won't come back... We were shameless, joking with our unhinged desire - we talked in dirty words about our lust, being a cocky bastard, she liked to be a "whore", bitch, wanted me to watch her, doing all kind of "depraved" sexual acts with full intensity, we "fucked like rabbits"... she was even squirting - which I experienced for the first time. But there was absolutely no negative emotion, no shame, no jealousy... I also felt deep appreciation and affection towards her. Like finding another special person with whom we can connect on deeper levels. It was a real feeling of bliss on Earth. Freshness, freedom, love, sexual energy! I felt I need to tell my other lover about that, I thought, wow, we have something special going on - everyone is so open, sensual, we can have such a special time on this Earth, enjoying so much together, no one "owning" anyone, all sharing affection and sensuality... and then - blackout... she was devastated to hear I had sex with another woman, she obviously only pretended to be open and free and wanting to experiment with others, while I really felt this openness and freedom... Then I started thinking if all this was wrong - if I hurt people... was I morally wrong? Selfish? I still felt honest and free, but I witnessed hurting others with my unhinged actions... All of us stopped communicating (they didn't want to hear from me). Then another crush of mine contacted me. A very sexy, but timid girl, who didn't know what she wants - she was very horny, single and not able to make connections to any man for several years, because she was too hurt in the past relationships. We met and (because I seemed to be so open and it somehow translated to others) she overcame her shyness and invited me for a massage (she was doing some training for a massage therapist) I agreed. Of course it turned into another otherworldly love-making session... I discovered that obviously that first girl (or our interaction) opened something in me - some sort of "sexual initiation" and that from now on I had similar experiences with all the lovers who were also surprised and discovered a new way of love-making in our "sessions"... The trick was, though, that it also triggered some sort of possessiveness, they wanted to keep that only for themselves, despite declaring free spirit and openness before. It only complicated things way too much. Everyone getting hurt, me feeling like a "gigolo" asshole in the end. We talked about these things, but none of them could feel the same way, even though they contacted me, wanted to establish communication again, but ignoring the other girls, like they don't exist... I think it is very difficult to have those dynamic relationships and maintain some balance, so everyone is happy and friends with everyone else... At that moment none of them had other partners, so I couldn't test how I would REALLY feel - because it was only hypothetical - maybe I would also become jealous or sad or felt cheated... Anyway - we managed to come to terms later and remain (distant) friends and I connected with another girl later, felt deep love for her, a sense of belonging and it felt like a very deep connection, so we "formed a couple" and live together now. I understand this feeling of openness and freedom, but I really don't desire more partners now. I am happy with my "wife" and we develop and grow together. Maybe some of you will find a way to remain in such an open relationship in which everyone is fulfilled and happy, but my experience was as I wrote in all the detail to paint the complexity of the situation (it was even more messed up and tasking). I have no prejudices either way. Do what feels right and makes you function and grow better in this world. Be honest and loving to other people in any way you function with them. But even with all good intentions, you could end up hurting others. Also - really be honest about your actions - having more partners to whom you lie and hide others, is not polyamory, Complete honesty and transparency is needed and then you will see if everyone is really happy in that "arrangement" and if it works.
  14. Until you really deeply fall in love... Then you'll probably feel a bit different about the concept of monogamy... I am sure there is not only one "perfect match" and probably you could have that kind of connection with several people on this planet... But, once you connect, there is not much need to add anything... I don't know what's a "solution" in general. Be honest. Follow your heart, but don't hurt others on the way. Be honest about what you wish, before you seduce them... if you are in an open relationship and it works, why asking for opinion... No need for validation if it works... I have no idea if it is "deeper" or not - I have been in a situation when I understood and felt this complete openness, possibility to (romantically) love more people, to be intimate with more people, open relationships, freedom, polyamory, etc. but it turned out that it is more of an temporary illusion... couples form naturally and it just isn't possible. People get hurt. Unintentionally. It is not so easy, it seems... Maybe you belong to a younger generation and it all changed for you. Anyway, If it works for you - great! Don't overthink it, just enjoy it. Live.