Striving for more

Freedom Adventure & Novelty Energy (Embodying & Spreading positive energy to the world) Power & Social Status Creativity Authenticity Boldness Connection & Friendship Abundance (Healthy) Competition

This level of perfectionism is far too unrealistic and also the best time to play video games is in the late evening, , when else can people play them. Video games would help you sleep because it's a relaxing activity. Again, too strict. I have to use my phone and computer often including close to bed time. My brain also works best closer to bed time. I'll just accept poor health because it doesn't align with my lifestyle, apart from good diet & exercise. I don't understand why you can't just do whatever you want and then for about 40 minutes before bed time, you meditate or relax somehow & then sleep, why has it gotta be so strict, this structure is not cool.

But Aren't there people who pull nearly every time they go out?

My plan going forward : Next 8 weeks will be spent doubling down on finances, going to try and earn 20K, Averaging 5 - 10K / Month. I will be waking up early, interacting with no one & no cheat meals in the week No sugar, no fapping, no internet surfing. gradually from 8 to 12 weeks I will start shifting my focus to pick up. I want to get some really hot girls this summer, I wanted it so bad last summer, I just didn't have enough theory or encouragement, I was doing it hopelessly like a headless chicken, going to the wrong places, hanging out with the wrong people. I am wiser now, I can propel my will on to the world now. Masculinity goes after what he wants, without shame. I want money & pretty women in my life... Is that so much to ask for?

I had some very creative thoughts earlier & wanted to share them on here, then I realized I can't, those thoughts are too unique & valuable, ant no one copying me, content creation & insight sharing is big business these days. No one would be able to compete with me ... If I just fucking started, it's been 3 or 4 years since I told myself I would start creating content.

I've tried to do too much & ask too much of myself this week & generally this year so far & this caused sleep disruptions, complete lack of daily structure & decision fatigue. The worst mistake I've made though : Doubling down on my mistakes. I was tired & forgot to apply law of attraction, I focused on the fact I was tired & how hard it was to do work, (still an excuse ), so I desperately wanted a solution but was looking from a neurotic, uncentered place ... somehow rationalized to myself gauging on sugar. The sugar binge "worked" : productive for 30-60 minutes (had insight that maybe I could've just done the work all along, it was merely the placebo idea of it working that got me in motion), then I crashed & slept terribly, I also fapped 3 times in that day. What I recall now is that ... As I was walking to shop in the rain after buying the sugar, I had this thought "Why don't I just go run in the rain instead & listen to music, that might energize me, that's quite beautiful" But I was too committed to the sugar. "Do what's hard & you make life easy, do what's easy & u make life hard". I woke up feeling as though I had smoked 5 big joints before bed. You see I was thinking too immaturely, there's a compounding negative effect to these actions, it's not merely "Oh a sugar crash for an hour oh no", it leads to an entire chain of negative karma. The root problem is the habit of doubling down on my mistakes, the sleep loss was not in my control, but in those days it's best to do what you can, prioritize & aim for 50% productivity but prioritize recovery & not compensate sugar & coffee. Lately I have noticed way more un resourceful ruminating thoughts, the things I could've done 3 years ago, the opportunities I wasted, why didn't I started socializing & pickup years ago? Ah, pain in the stomach. I can't afford to allow these thought patterns to even occur, meditation & law of attraction is my solution, but also productivity & building an epic life is equally valid, I need both. when my life is great, busy successful & social I won't be regretting what I didn't do, I'll be too busy enjoying myself & winning. I just can't, can't live with low self esteem anymore, therefore I will prioritize both these solutions religiously : Meditate & Visualize, ruthless positive action + Strong boundaries against negative Actions & Thoughts It's time to rebuild, again ...

I fucking hate my name "striving for more", this gives the impression that I'm a serious guy like that but that doesn't do justice my sense of humour. I wanted to change my name but when leo messaged me I froze up, I couldn't let it land that a guru would contact me at that point, now I'm stuck with this name I suppose. It sucks. I'm immature focusing on my name like this/

life isn't about "hard work" but timing, proactiveness, getting out your own way & boldness. Guy A (Most guys) > Goes to club with his loser friends, they stand around dancing for a while, occasionally glancing over at some girl they might wanna talk to, then glancing away, pretending to have fun with their friends, Guy A considers approaching woman, but hesitates & then that knocks his confidence subtly by 10%, he then dancings another 20 minutes, gradually feeling more awkward. Then Guy A. (because he has an unhealthy resistance to tension & wants a coping mechanism) Decides to go to the bar, he goes there sees a girl & hesistates again, then pretends to care about buying a drink, orders the drink but the drink is quite expensive, guy A knows he should save money, but his resistance to tension is stronger than his personal boundaries Guy A. spends too much on a drink & loses 10% more confidence, walks back to his loser friends & dances, this same pattern goes on an on until eventually it's 3AM now & he hasn't approached, he finally takes up the courage to approach but then gets blown out because the hesitation knocked his confidence & the timing is off, "you had 3 hours to approach me & now you do it? Guy A. interprets this event negatively & then buys another 2 or 3 drinks, spending a couple hours wages & gets drunk now Guy A. full of energy & stays at club until 5AM, Drunk, 2 hours wage on a taxi & an hour to get home, wakes up hungover, dehydrated & poor. Now guy A. is behind on his bills, guy A. now has to work extra hard now, with all this energy depletion too, even more willpower required. Guy B. goes into club, sees what he wants, instant blown out but interprets it as just a warm up, builds momentum quickly, sober. Guy B. entered the club free & early because he didn't hesitate like guy A, his timing good because the women approachable still & with his fast initiative he appears super confident. After 40 minutes of approaching guy B. finally hooks & starts dancing with the right girl, they dance & make out, guy B builds rapport & then suggests his home. Excellent logistics so it's effortless persuasion ("just a quick drink we'll find your friends later"), they walk 5 minutes to his home & have sex. Guy B. by 2AM already had great sex & is ready to sleep now. Guy b. wakes up fucks her again for an hour, asks her to leave because he has boundaries & an abundance mindset, this attractive & she wants reconnect. Because of the multiple orgasms' she is hooked like a junky, Guy B. now owns this girl & the power is in his hands. His brain flooded with dopamine & confidence & an impetus for creative work now, it's 11AM & Guy B knocks out 4 hours of deliberate practice & is in flow . He even finds some time to reflect on how his game could've been even better & smoother, 4PM Guy B already had awesome sex & done creative work. He's free now to do whatever he wants, maybe he'll take a stroll on the beach & effortlessly game another , with all this momentum, Guy B discovers she plays piano so they join his crib & improv juntos his grand piano, lower & higher octaves in perfect synchrony, 2 equal talents in perfect musical harmony, foreshadowing the sex. Fireworks outside because it's a celebration every day in victory city. Normal reality doesn't exist because Guy B transcended to higher levels, to paradigms of a god. Guy B doesn't experience bad trips anymore, every mushroom trip elates & elevates his mind to function higher in normal reality, but his life is so epic that it is unfathomable for the ordinary Joe, stuck in lower paradigms. Guy A. meanwhile is busting his ass to make up for all the money he wasted at his endless crappy job, his life ihard & the more hard he works, the more is taken from him. To guy B. everything will be given, to guy A. everything will be taken. Unless guy A. finds a MENTOR ... But guy Bs are rare & elusive, Guy A. may catch him incidentally if one applies the principles of Law of Attraction

Life Insights, Pick up, Self - Sabotage & Doing less not more : life isn't about hard work, doing more, saying more. Good life is doing less, saying less & staying out of your own way. Social skills = removing trauma energy & bad conditioning that you were never meant to have but almost everyone has because we live in a social matrix. Pickup boils down to : Instantly approaching girl touch her eye contact, not half heartedly but with full conviction & intention, not speaking a lot saying some convoluted joke to impress her, & in doing so much, you just turn her off at worse, & at best dilute the sexual tension into confusion. Pickup is deceptively simple, but so difficult to embody for most of us, unless your lucky; type of guy who's brain acts in alignment with his feelings. This my insight yesterday, it hooked in seconds, she was available, I touched her, she liked that but I didn't hold the tension, didn't let it land, forgot even proper eye contact!, I immediately retracted & verbalized some convoluted joke to "flirt somehow", but all I needed was a firmer touch, strong sexual eye contact, hello & 1 simple line, then hold in that tension & own it & let an interaction just unfold. But I did too much. Gotta just focus on main, core theme & own that (energetic) theme, "I am a sexual man & you are hot, I am touching you without shame & looking at your eyes & I want you & I am entitled to you, hello, take it or leave it", nothing to prove, don't need a convoluted joke, ta dah. I always say too much, do it half heartedly or eject too early. Remove these self sabotaging habits that prevent me from just going after my desires. Questioning Effectiveness LOA & Visualization : I did 10 minute LAO Visualization session before I went out visualizing being a player & getting the girls, but then when I went out the same self - sabotaging mechanisms kicked in & prevented me from success, I still ultimately feel unconfident & getting an attractive woman feels either impossible or just not worth the effort So I question effectiveness of visualization to truly modify subconscious & deep habits. But I haven't tried enough time & must stay open minded, probs brain takes long to rewire, problem is my socializing & approaching isn't consistent enough because I need more money logistics time Logistics is KING The priority isn't finding esoteric opportunities or magic hacks, it's noticing what's hiding in plain sight & allowing yourself to notice & capitalize in the moment & hone your selective focus on that & blurr out all the b.s Toxicity Rant : Urh ... can't keep writing, I can't use my brain right now, I exposed to too much pollutants yesterday, should have been wiser, I probably a ton of additional plastics & metals & pollutants in my body now. I hope can detox this exposure, don't want to end up like that Brian guy, I'm already half way there. Fucking irritaing, I know I had great insights to share withmyhself &* the world but my brain isn't functioning right now, I'm not sure if II'll recover, how did I not consider how toxic that exposure would be, this might be the end of me, I'll see how I feel in several days, I have lost all my energy & capacity to think right now. ... Tbh I did just eat rice > DUMB IDEA, so that probably contributed to my brain deadness. Nothing kills my brain more than grains, I'd chose sugar over grains every time. Still I don't feel good about this exposure either way.

Everytime I wrote out a journal post on weekends I always go back & rewrite it, I remove unecessary filler words adverbs ect... I do this to train myself to be as concise & to the point as possible, I hate over explaining, needless repittions or just innacurate descriptions. I'm not tryna be a writer, but why the fuck wouldn't you have good communication ability, this is thinking, persuasion, this is influence, this power, verbal acuity. I will get better over time, slowly, it is not my core priority, but I think even with mindfulness doing this 20 minutes a week I'd be shocked at my results in 3 - 6 months, It's amazing no one does this, go and watch any youtube video, with the Exception of someone like Leo, most youtubers articulation sucks, even if they provide valuable points, they're basically stealing minutes away and also diluting the value into a sea of incoherence & over - description (or under). + Conisder all the needless umms & urhhs & other shit, bad posture, weak voice, low conviction. Fucking mediocre, not me.

Ah I had to start writing again, I should stop & release all this friction, I forgot how im so sensitive to chemicals, alcohol, certain foods. I thought it was innocent eating fried sugary food & drinking , no I can almost feel myself entering a deep depression already. I become too self - reflective & it hurts, too much guilt & shame.. Just wrote out a journal but deleted it, too personal, keep & bury it to myself, , we all fucking experience pain regret shame trauma Im just normal person, save it for those who got real problems, man the fuck up & get on with my life. I gotta chase extreme success, in all areas, runaway from myself, no more thoughts, regrets. Everything goes into the work, the artform, not 1 thing but the work of life, whtether it's learning piano, pickup, personal skills, persuasion, leadership, it all goes to the work. I was born to be a workaholic, but difference between me & Warren buffet is my workaholism is more inclusive creative & holistics, his is very narrowed down, I see my entire life as an artform, I get too bored of just 1 thing, I'd love to learn piano but I couldn't play it 8 hours a day, more like 1 hour. I always had this innate drive, passion, since I was 14, whether it was sports or playing piano for the first time, trying to attract a cute girl, it was inutively always art for me, life is art, life is mastery. I reconnect with this.

Failing at life again, too disorganized. Not lazy, just not strategic nor organized enough. Keep underestimating how much time something requires, not even talking career stuff. Making it to a social event ect.. I keep living my life day to day & week by week. URh, fuck my biggest regret is not building the habit of planning my year in advance, if I'd started that habit at 16? My brain isn't designed to think like that, I need humility & honesty to remember life takes a lot of planning, not merely intuition or willpower. Every year of my life in the last 6 years has oscillated between hollow & disappointing & traumatizing, but mostly just hollow & disappointing. Some of this was down to depression, but even more so a lack of planning. Plan to the end. Plan to the end. The problem is though, I don't even have time to plan to the end! Because I don't want to give up on my short to mid term goals & acitivities this year, but Ideally i'd have planned for them a year ago ... & It's like I have to improvise on the spot, but that's fucking horrible, then I try do so much at once, that ultimatley I end up doing nothing. Really I should just double down on income, energy & health until that's somewhat fixed at least to the point of stability, then move on to the next ... But I'm so arrogant, I think I'm a god. What if I'm not? What I'm just a loser, a clown. NO FUCK OFF NOO I AINT MAN NOO URH SO COMPETITIVE, IT'S LIKE I'M COMPETING WITH GOD HIMSELF, THE OWN VOICES IN MY HEAD, RHHRL ARHEEHRHR. ERRHHH EWW. I need to slow down & focus on Essentialism & Minimalism. I just realistically will not be able to simultaenously work & be doing regular pickup until 2-4am & plan for important events, I can barely even do 2 of those things. For me I don't like late night pick up, (well sometimes it's cool "everything in moderation including moderation", but only if the context is perfect & it's maybe summer) I prefer day game & even then I can't do long hourly sessions UKHSDAKUJFHGKUASDF I DONT EVEN HAVE TIME TO JOURNAL MY THOUGHTS RN WTF AM I DOING LIFE SLOW DOWN GO BACK 5 YEARS FUCK YOU. AND I'M GONNA DELETE THIS JOURNAL PROBABLY COZ I'M SO PERFECTIONIST, EVEN MY THOUGHTS MUST BE PERFECTED. Is this journal just another repitition of my thoughts? They say we have the same thoughts like X hundred times per day over & over, running the program. If so better delete this shit. Going to meditate now, going round in circles I drank yesterday, I did not plan to, I did not have fun & I wasted so much time like a headless chicken, I understimated environmental cues & willpower depletion & social matrix & I drank, today I feel shit, I also fucked up sleep this week why am I journalling still? STFU STUFU.

Yesterday Evening : I just got entangled in endless mid life crisis esque thought loops of regret & rumination & delusional hubris for several hours, I have somehow broken out of it. My forehead is still scrunched. 3-5 Hours today : Got lost in negativity & apathy & "being low energy", "I have brain fog, I can't change, I have energy depletion". Ate a huge amount of sugar with the inention of using that as fuel to work Did it work? yes... ] Is it sustainable or holistic > No? Worth the side effects? > No because I care about looking my best & not needless fat, age skin intense energy 2-2.5 hours, but already crashed after 3 hours. Therefore inferior strategy. I know this anyway this is childish baby shit, no regrets though momentum has kicked in. Never underestimate older videos, or "simple" concepts. This was exactly what I needed to listen to. I can't let this video go, it's very simple to grasp, but must seep into subconscious, I must become law of attraction, become the knowledge. Posting the summary of this on my wall & reading it every day until it sticks. Applying it everyday & reminding myself every time I forget & do the inverse, but must not forget to remind myself because the mind becomes so enmeshed in it's shit so u forget to remind yourself that's its edge so my edge premortem constant default g cal reminders there in place to counter this but also building the counter habit in the moment reactive awareness too (if even possible), literally lost so much time & oppurtunities in my life merely to inversing this principle, everything was in reverse, my mind was in reverse. Thoughts + Visions > Emotions > Actions > Results > Emotions & Thoughts > Actions > Results .... Results. Why ... Why did I not take this seriously enough right from the start? If I just nailed this 1 thing at 15? Lol crazy bro. Yes I have "broken my no forum time rule or youtube rule", but I am not listening to any other youtube from here, high vib, not even another video of leos. I drill this 1 in, I drill it day after day from here after.

Then why do you recommend it so much. You made multiple videos on learning + mentioned it in your core pillars of the good life.

Found this video very clarifying, I already knew deep down this is what I need, but good to hear it articulated this way. What clicked with me the most with this video : I should take a week off all internet use Blocking all internet use that is not work, goal related or personal journalling. THIS. Spend more time doing chores ect... without listening to any audio, without any audiobook, YouTube video, music, self - help > Because I need to get back in touch with my own natural intuitions, emotions, ideas as well just learn to enjoy the present moment, without external stimulation. It's crazy actually, the main problem with education & self help & the internet for me is getting so entangled constantly looking to others to absorb more & more information, to be told how to think & this is so addictive. Having a separate user account on my digital devices for work & the things I want, gotta be real if the distraction is an option, I'll normally take it Pre schedulling internet usage e.g this forum or youtube, which I'll start doing after my 1 week break. But the most important person to listen to & focus on is myself. This is the last youtube video I will watch this entire week, that is 1 metric of my detox goal, I already know what I need to do.

I currently use one called waterdrop. You replace the water every 90 days. (Article Quote) : So do these portable filters not actually remove metals & toxins? I don't have my own house my landlord is a social matrix sheep & I couldn't imagine convincing her to being allowed to play with the pipes & install a house filter like that or , unless it's really easy to work it out & I wouldn't brake something I think until I have my own place, , I will be drinking these portable filters... am I continually absorbing more metals & toxins?

Feeling a constant battle within myself. I have an internet addiction. They say the 1st step to change is admitting it. Even when I'm getting productive, this satanic devil creeps back in. Even after a week of hard focused work, it comes back & keeps me up at night, I get in to a trance state. I know I can't handle it, I can't handle youtube or even google, even this forum. A long battle that has gone on for too long now, I never solved it at the root I guess. I am setting harder boundaries with myself, right now my brain is not able to handle youtube this forum or even most google use. I need the internet though so it's not so simple, but I am detoxing as much as I can until I feel I can handle it, even though I get value from this forum & I appreciate it a lot, it can just become a tool of self - decay so easily, the line is so thin ... although YouTube is the worst for me, YouTube is the devil (especially since you can learn so much with YouTube, but u can also "learn" so much, before u know it ur like a junky at the casino machine, & honestly lets be humble here, what's the fucking difference? There's no difference & I feel ashamed & weak to admit it). Internet addiction scares me the most. Imagine if you took heroin but except ur brain feels the heroin is good for you sometimes, u trick urself into seing this as "minor", "harmless" or even "I'm learning" ,this is the internet, just a lot more insidious than heroin. Besides, both blowing ur potential & missing out on the experience & beauty of real life are a form of death, there isn't really so much difference between internet addiction & heroin. I chose to live a life of Presence, to make internet an enhancement to real life, but be detached to it. I chose to rebel from mainstream culture. I chose to be the guy who, when at the resteruants with the girl, I'm 100% there, 100% of the time, the meal out is a form of meditation, I don't check the phone once & neither does she, because she's entranced & infected by my presence & attention, & becomes that herself. I chose a different life, the present life, the real life. I chose no more of the sad life. This starts with awareness & admittance, but add some quick dopamine detox & Stricter boundaries and meditation + clarity on worthwhile goals & a sense of urgency These are temporary emergency solutions & they are necessary, but I doubt it solves the root issue The problem will come back to bite me .. of running away from reality, getting lost in my endless curiosity, retreating into another world. But with this awareness, with this awareness I set the intention to solve the root issue for good, I don't know how, but I side with the humility to admit that it is a persistent problem that will require something else, maybe coaching, maybe a mushroom trip, maybe many things. I did not do this. The problem began when I watched that very 1st youtube video, "Just one video, just one video. Sunday is my precious life architect day, Sunday is my peace. Fight for my Sundays & the lord will bless my life with victory.

@YarcoWait so how the F*** are you lucky then? haha You haven't listed any attractive traits about yourself but Im curious to know now You accidentally found a nice gf lol ? U have some weird inexplicable charm? ... Just checked this youtuber out > This guy is litterally doing inverse law of attraction, posts videos labeling himself an Incel in the title, that is not gonna help his self image, mindset or reputation.

I've made decision to remarry No Fap. I've done 6 month streaks, multiple month streaks, I know the feeling & I like it. Recently I've been dabbling in & out & this week it's just being awful, daily & even 2 times a day once. I'm not saying I'll never fap again, but it will be random & uncommon. From now on, I'll will just not fap. If the urge becomes REALLY strong, What i'll do is satisfy the pleasure urge in another way, like go to a resteruants or eat a little cake, heard this tip recently. Not for minor urges, but say after a week or 2, I'll just satisfy myself with a cheat meal, because for me a beer now & then or a little cake here & there, u brush that off with a walk, sleep gym ect.. But Masturbating even just once for me, it certainly takes a lot out of you & it's not like u just recover after a day, a lot longer especially psychologically. Ruins cognitive capacities. I'm open minded, I do think it's ok to perhaps masturbate sometimes if the urge is just too much, but my experience is telling me it's a fucking important habit, every time my overall drive & discipline starts to go, it's always after fapping regularly, every time. And I mean who the fuck doesn't just love the feeling of being out or in the gym & u see that girl, you just know that if something happened your ready to fuck, bools full & your ready to just oomph, gotta have that oomph. Right now If I got laid it would be insulting to the girl, I doubt I'd even be able to get it up. I feel weak & tired like a prey ... limp shrivelled dick lolz. I noticed usually fappers aren't successful or happy, they're broke, they're bitter. There are rare exceptions. No fap is coming back, it's not everything, but a it's major catalyst

Did 2 hours straight of complex meta learning today. That's the easy part, reading shit that makes u FEEL like a genius, BUT Learning = Multi - Step Process & real learning is about personal transformation, not absorbing information once. But how do I actually remember it, internalize it, get it to change my behavior & utimately become the knowledge as well as ruthless apply it? And how do I avoid the self deception mechanism of over conceptualization & addiction to knowledge, over thinking VS Action 90-95% action & direct experience, this is how life should be anyway. I dunno, these questions somewhat represent an art form, like a golf swing or balancing on ice skates, I probably just gradually get better (or I don't if I don't have awareness & intention then I'll just stay mediocre, awareness is everything ultimately, I do believe awareness heals all wounds, but it takes time to get the compound interest from it(. Reading about meta - learning, but the mind just wants irony & not doing anything meta with that information & just go read something else, like a leaky bath tub & it can't fill up, can't catch the water cos it keeps leaking out & u keep the water going but nothing sticks. Made that mistake many times before, fuck that. Ruthless Application & cognitive & psychological humility forever, my mind always wants to take the lazy addictive path. Read book> Assimilate > Double check I assimilated > connect dots > Reflective questions > Rapid Implementation plan > Implement > record results > Feedback > Iteration. Scientific method is pretty powerful applied to self help > observation, technique experiment feedback iteration, & observe variables). I Read couple hours & then did some responsibilities for an hour or 2, then I got back into a fucking rut, had a little chocolate, was DURPING around, obsessing over food & distraction, listened to some owen cook, then a Leo clip about asking questions, had to remind myself Then I googled about being in a rut, & boom I was sorta outa the rut > Make goals & focus on them > This primes delayed gratification & there's a silent power to Anticipation, Anticipation is energizing Reminder of techniques to implement /Increase consistency : G cal schedulling on micro & macro Goal Setting Across every domain (micro & macro) - (small + big picture) Plans Pre mortem Pre schedulling / Time blocking basically every day for the entire week Sunday life architect day (TOMORROW WILL I DO IT) Goals > Vision Board > Visualization (I realized more powerful than just visualization alone, intensifies & specifies the focus of the visualization session)

Fapped to porn 3 times in last 2 days. Eaten some chocolate today & yesterday. Ocd & adhd extremely bad, but went away after porn ( & replaced by numbness). Watched 2 hours of reactionary YouTube videos, which I said I would not watch any more of, but excuse was "Im cleaning & tidying my room so I will watch these". Problem with this : That's a dangerous excuze that carves the groove for watching more of it in the future This is multi-tasking, I always do this, listening to audio staff whilst doing chores, it works with automated behaviours : hoovering washing dishes, doesn't work with rearranging stuff in room that requires constant micro - decisions & focus, even listening to leo is still problematic if im also doing tasks that require some conscious attention : slows me down. Gonna start scheduling even my learning times because it's bad if it's multitasking & doing my tasks slower & not absorbing it probably kinda futile, I want true understanding & need to take the time to do the exercizes & extra research, real gains not passive "Learning". porn & chocolate probably response to : Disrupted sleep, decision fatigue, stress, overwhelm. I can't fathom any other solutions than eliminate the sources of stress & achieve everything I need to, intimate sex would be than porn or chocolate & I am excited to introduce that aspect to my life once I climbed up maslow's pubes. I addicted to coffee again Becoming addicted to chocolate & porn? apparently? highly addicted to overthinking, either this an addiction, due to brain toxicity or genetic disorder I must develop meta skills like prioritization This is the year that I finally become organized, I want to say this month, I really want to, I have so much to accomplish experience this month but I feel pretty pessimistic, I think the workaholic money thing will probably work out, but the social stuff, I have not planned for it & never underestimate the organization & strategy needed for social & logistical Here I am again, overthinking, not concise This is the year I become a master communicator This is the year I do mercury rounds & upgrade my brain (Highly pessimistic about if it will work out, all I know is ocd, add, brain fog, it's all I ever know, all I know is sucking at everything

I'm on a break & decided to jump into the manosphere rabit hole. This guy just keeps doubing down on it lol. Gotta be careful because I'm tryna be ultra focsued & these type of youtube videos are HIGHLY ADDICTIVE, so I apologize for condoning & perpetuating idle other - centred content consumption addiction, I could easily watch these videos for 5 hours straight & I know myself, so I decide to end this right now. Anyway : Elliot unconsciously contradicts himself "women should be monogamous wives yet ... "a key that opens many locks is a good key but not the inverse blah blah" ^ So you're saying it's good for men to sleep around , therefore it helps if the locks are easily opened so that means that it would help women sleep around too lol! Reminds me of Hasanbi qoute (I do not watch him no more & generally plan to stay away from these type of videos, Bad for your life addictive! BEWARNED!!!) But : "slut shaming is dumb because if women are "sluts" then they're more likely to fuck you, you fool" lool. The contradiction is so dumb, You wanna be a player & moan about how "uptight & demanding" women are but when they have casual sex, they're just a "slut". I've had many dumb ideas like all of us but thankfully I never fell for the slut shaming narrative, some reason I saw through the idiocy of it at a young age. People can do whatever they fucking want lool, these discussions shouldn't even need to exist ... "Wanna have kids? > Great for you!" (I don't, but I coudln't care less if someone else does, wanna have relationsip great!, wanna be a "Slut" Great! I love "Sluts", I think they're carefree, open minded & sexy but I don't have a problem with a woman marrying her childhood sweetheart, who gives a fuck lool Stage blue is what it is, it's cringe. I genuinely feel sorry for Elliot Hulse, I genuinely love him & believe he has good intentions at heart, he had some potential, but he's too far gone, look at how speaks his energy. Lool I think he probably shoulda fucked more women in his life (Not because "THAT'S HOW REAL MEN SHOULD BE"). But my guess is he wouldn't be so idelogical & crazy obsessed with these boring fucking conversations lol. There's amazing architecture & plants & music & Travel & just plain meeting different people & laughing & being in the present moment all this & he's obssessed with this shit, I genuinely feel sorry for him, he really is missing out. Issues with dan bilzerian or elliot hulse is (both very different ideological focus but ultimately the same root problems : the same traps of the mind) cannot go meta, locked in paradigms, driven by insecurity OK RANT OVER >> NO MORE OF THESE YOUTUBE VIDEOS, I KNOW IT IS AN ADDICTIVE PATTERN CONSCIOUSNESS, I have goals back to focusing on myself & no more of this this month. I felt like pointing this shit out, but this kind of content is not for me, I wasted hundreds of hours addictively watching this type of meta content (not elliot hulse vid but vid of another critiquing or satirising elliot hulse & other ect..)& while it has it's place for when I was getting locked into cringey ideas like red pill, the student is ready to disappear & only entertain myself with content I love, like looking at gardens & plants (Soo beta lol) or watching the big soccer games. I Chose to entertain myself with what makes me happy, no longer what makes me triggered

+ Pre - Mortem. >> Combine Pre- motem with G calendar > Can schedule monthly & annually pre mortems. Goals > Half there & been writing down daily goals but still need more specificity & create sense of urgency with more macro or mid term goals. To do list/Prioritees list > Half there again & doing well on daily timeframe but to zoom out to weeks to months simultaneously & use my Sundays more strategically & proactively as Life Architect Day.. It's hard because on Sunday temptation to relax & "Durp" is highest, then again if I can my life architecture done in the morning, then Sunday evenings I can catch up on the soccer highlights & eat an ice cream & "enjoy the shit out of it". Visualization > Consistently doing 5 minutes per day so far > Adding 5 more minutes before sleep because night time mind is most imaginative & subconscious. Meditation > Consistently daily last 2 weeks G Calendar > Yes, started using this more frequently recently, must ingrain schedulling habit Structure > Seriously lacking, still drowning in a sea of valuable information I just can't find the time to restructure my personal journals, my mind struggles with simplicity & minimalism but it is what I need most

2 Hours of Evening speed reading > a lot of wisdom to declutter & recycle right now + additional recycling from previous programs videos & my own direct experience internalized thus far only to the surface. These notes will all be made off recall whilst fatigued & stressed so may be fuzzy & blury & very unstructured, but I know that active recall is an important step in deeper learning, so I embrace this. Some of these points will be things I already know that I don't need to be told again, some will be things I "Knew" but didn't really know, others will be things I didn't even know I should need to know, others will be things I just learnt that I want to consolidate & recycle. No need to judge billionaires I extract the useful & apply The mind is a crazy place & there's a whirlwind of infinite knowledge constantly expanding, thus 1 goes meta & learns the core, unchaing principles of thinking, understanding, learning, behavior of success: One learns "principles", or better put, "mental models". Mental models & Meta understanding. Mental Models are way more important than anything else, because they shape how you see reality, "80/20" is a mental model & meta concept, but to go meta meta is to acknowledge that 80/20 rule is mental model & that like with cognitive biases there's I think a whole list of these, gonna internalize the shit out of them. Knowledge & skills come as a tree, and within a tree you have the roots & the trunks & the big branches, to which expand twigs & leaves & all the micro elements. Always start with the foundations, especially foundations of thinking & life that can expand & connect across multiple domains, being a specialist is overrated, the "expert generalist" is underrated. 10,000 hour rule is highly overacted & parroted except for sports & other specific domains, but doesn't apply for something like business success & much of life success. You don't need 10K hour rule if you chose a profession or skill or business model that is both rare and valuable. Many professions are valuable but not rare, therefore competition is too high, in that case you need 10,000 or 20 or 30K hours, and you still might not make it. If I select a rare and valuable micro skill, then I could technically achieve world class status within 100 hours, especially if I'm the first to invent this skill, furthermore, when you combine unique combinations of rare & valuable micro skills, the world is now yours, & at a fast rate too. Select a small pond in unknown territory, where you can't get eaten by the big fish & over-saturation is non-existent Mathematics Implications : The infinite nature of combinatorial possibilities. When u combine any 2 disparate elements together, you obtain a unique combination, the bigger quantity of elements to combine = Exponential (not linear) increase in the amount of potential combinatorial Outcomes. (A+B=AB, A+B+C = AB OR AC OR BC, A+B+C+D = AB OR AC OR AD OR BC OR BD OR ABCD OR ABD OR BCD OR ACD...) This translates to the combinatorial power of diverse knowledge or skills for creativity, especially rare/unique + valuable ones. Focus, Visualize & Brain storm > what could go wrong, not just the positive outcomes Further consolidated & reminded me of the pre - mortem concept, (TANGENT, PERSONAL FAILING : I must be honest, I watched Leos vids & I half applied it in my notes, never came back to my notes since & left it like that, no benefit to my life so far, just a theory in my head) But I'm going to start taking this practice seriously & gonna apply it properly this week Success isn't merely about success, it's about not doing the things that cause failure, I've got to stay more humble in any endeavor I take & remember that 1. my brain is not wired for my success & fulfillment nor the world we live in, Ima slave to tons of psychological biases, emotions (wrath, greed fear anger hubris sloth envy jealousy addiction rumination) & faulty prioritization) & life is infinite & unpredictable, so without a pre mortem meta tackling foresight of all the myriad of obstacles that could come to attack me, my defences won't be ready to handle them as they come. Avoid Russian Roulette Games : Just because something is unlikely to occur, if It could destroy , it is not worth the risk Use decision trees > positive Outcome > probability of occurrence > magnitude of positive effect Negative outcome > probability of occurrence > magnitude of negative effect Calculate : Probablity * Magnitude respectively >> subtract negative from postive ** The importance here is not on getting specific numbers, but the insight gained from this type of thinking. Soon I will study (The 80/20) major cognitive biases & relate this to my past direct experiences & my how to manage & dance with these) Key Examples (I can recall) : Sunk cost phal lacy confirmation bias "1st choice bias"(?) > (correct title no lo sé) but we have tendency to choose the 1st oppurtunity that comes are way & we rationalize to ourselves that it was the right decision, failing to consider the Oppurtunity Cost to better opportunities & then after investing in it we double down & create a sunk cost, I've fallen for this issue before, (probably several times). Liking Bias (Very simple, but gotta remind oneself of how irrational we all are, we vote for who we like & support who we like) * Oppurtunity Cost (although such a simple concept), it is one which I'm truly starting to "understand" & develop strong awareness for, I thank Owen Cook for reminding & consolidating the strength of this neural node for me & nudging it to the forefront of my brain, it's gradually impacting how I think & interact with the world, (partly just down to more conscious awareness of death & life's brevity) Steps to Rapid Learning & Insight about the underrated meta skill of Skill Selection certain micro skills can be worth minimum wage whereas other micro skills are worth $1000/Hour, it matters what u choose Time Ferris's DSSS Method D - Deconstruct > Deconstruct skill into it's foundational core components (& into stepxstep process ?) S - Select > 80/20 methods for building skill S - Sequence > Chose the order of steps for developing skill S - Accountability ... Find consequences for not taking the actions Lasting Relationships & Networks are Crucial > But they won't happen by accident Network Links (*Mindmap would be more suitable right here) : Buyer - seller dynamic >> be the buyer not the seller, always have a screening checklist written down > internalized for any form of relationships I enter : Oppurtunity cost Examples : (Screening, Filtration system, do not even give anyone who doesn't fit the list a chance, I have lost a lot of time & potential to the wrong friends, wrong connection, wrong employers before, never again). X + Y values X + Y midset, goals ambitions Genuinely enjoy his/her company Values connection & team play as much or more than personal success Sense of humor ect.. Disqualifiers = X, Y, Z (Less fresh info recall > Owen Cook's High Status Mentoring (or communication whatever) Program : An epic epic program, I will watch this again when I have more time & recurate my notes The sweetest word is "You", you don't wanna bore your prospects talking about yourself, you mention THEM, you MAKE IT ABOUT THEM "Double Your Dating" > Double = Benefit, "Your" = THEM Features & Benefits, not subjective statements, "I'm awesome, ooh i'm rich oo yeah" = EWWW. No, "This product contains x & y features & it will benefit you in x & y way" Program completely revolutionized my understanding of & respect for the importance of marketing. u can literally sell people anything no matter how toxic or stupid, for any fucking price u want, with the right marketing. Crazy thing : the price u set actually makes little difference to whether people will buy, sometimes increasing the price actually increases sales. Meta Point - Despite all the gd tips above & many more avaialble on marketing, the most underated aspect is : Developing yourself energetically , this entails that u get to a point where anything u say & do, has impact, because captivating just becomes who u are, you could whisper & still people will pay attention. Hook > ? > Show Authority > Captivating Story(?) > Close > Call to Action CALL TO ACTION > KRYPTONITE TO THE "WAYNE NEWTON". This is 1 of the best fucking concepts I'lve learned from Owen, it's so obvious yet so simple. Maybe 50% of my all my failures in life were down to Wayne Newtons : U speak to girl & u flirt & DHV for 2 hours, but then U WAYNE NEWTON, U don't close, u don't get the number, (or I'd say even getting the number for me is a wayne newton, cos when the fuck does that lead to anything), a part of me wants to just give up on asking for numbers now ""Burn the boats, it's a live pull or nothing") U meet a really cool guy & u speak for hours & have a great time > but u don't arrange to meet again or u forget to get the social I watch a youtube video or read a book with clear techniques or action steps, but it becomes a wayne newton, how many fucking times Have I done this? It's so rediculously wasteful & laughable yet humans like to be lazy & shiny object syndrome, off to the next dopamine hit. Tai Lopez "here in my garage" Recall notes : Production choice (u have 2 choices in production > professional vs personal) > tai chose personal (holding phone in 1 hand close up using back camera) > Increase authenticity but lacks authority (which professional production choice exudes) To compensate this Tai strategically shows authroity & constantly reminds the viewer of his authoirty "In my ted talk where I talk about how I read a book a day", (shows camera to the lambo then back to the bookshelf then the lambo again) The lambo & book shelf is also a very clever Hook that he uses to draw in the audience & hold attention, not just any audiance but his targeted niche of young ambitious men who want wealth He then leads to a STORY** > Which gives him more time to hold the viewers attention & lead them down the funnel. He grounds the sucess story into a relatable path ("yh but who says I could get ur lambo tai?") > "Not long ago back when I was in a mobile home with $47 bucks in my bank account ... But then I found a MENTOR & another mentor So the story now more relatable + he slips in mentor > He hasn't even mentioned the product hes selling yet BUT > He's already creating the sales message (& it's like an implicit pre-sale technique) that the mentor is the step to wealth, duh he's the mentor. Tired & can't remember or don't even wanna try recall much more of this Tai section, it's boring me rn .. OHH & STORIES. ANOTHER HUGE INSIGHT (Thanks Owen!) Stories are everything > It's how we passed down traditions & wisdom for pre - literate millennia, we are literally evolved to be engaged by stories "Hey I'm awesome buy my product, or this product is great it has x features" Features & benefits are important, scatter them in to a captivating story, u can turn anything into a story & I intuit that the hardest part would actually be the energy work & public speaking ability more so than the mechanics of effective story - telling - (Not too complicated) Hm > Hook > Build authority > Relatability? > ? > Close > Call to action ? ^^ Find notes To Read : Kickass copywriting secrets of a marketing rebel, & probably couple other ones. Recall over - Random Conecept consolidation links : "Spend less time trying to be brilliant & more time avoiding stupidity".

I felt too tense so I fapped. But because I fapped now I feel to apathetic. Incorrect solution. I regret killing my 4/5 day streak. Need better, quick (healthy) solutions in place to release tension. Meditation isn't enough, Requisite variety needed. I have dissipated my life force. Not helpful. The persistent support of regular Masturbation just startles me, I can't think of anything more draining, how can Leo still recommend this? It can help after several weeks of build up, but not regular, no fucking way.