Realms of Wonder

This is so technical, its difficult to watch, but this is FREAKING INSANE!! thanks for sharing

Why do I do the things I do? Why am I attracted to those things that feel so good but hurt me in the long run? Why do I run from the responsibilities that could changed my life? Why do I play the subtle victim? Why am I the way I am? Today unfolded like a blanket held on one edge and flapped like a wave, I tried to think of what was beyond the crest of time, and failed. So I rode the wave instead. One of my newer co-workers, has dreams, though deeply mired in cultural norms and habits, he has dreams, even though he says he is afraid to ask questions because of the uncertainty it will bring. He still dreams. Of opening a Café, of having a better life, of being financially independent. he hasn't accepted the call, but he dreams. Maybe I project myself onto him, but I see a spark, I will not let him down by giving unsolicited advice, I will instead help him understand himself, by being an example, an inspiration, with questions, with resources he can lean on. I want to empower him to overcome his unique struggle. In fact... I want to help as many people as possible, overcome their unique struggles. Trauma, brainwashing, ideology, negative thinking, limiting beliefs, lack of self-love, inauthenticity, people pleasing. I want to be a guide, a light that shines into their "soul" so they can see who they really are, under the muck, under the layers of bullshit, that spark within us all, that desire to grow, to love, to create. that spark of consciousness. On the way home from work tonight, I sing in the car, "What will I be when I Wake up? What will be left the stories have been washed away?" "Who will I be when I wake up? how much of "me" will remain?" "All of the stories, all of the lies, all of the boundaries, all in the mind" "How will life be when I wake up?" Goodnight dear reader, love yourself fully, don't accept shit from anyone, even me - Paul

PMO = Porn Masturbation Orgasm. I love those that you listed. Thanks for sharing that.

Maybe it is, maybe it isn't, who are you to say? Each person is different. While I do agree with you from my point of view, my life HAS improved as I healed my addiction to PMO, and cut it completely from my life. But that doesn't mean its best for everyone.

And its much appreciated. When I began no-fap/no porn, I was super dogmatic about it, lots of black and white statements, beliefs and so on.. this forum has actually help me see how different it is for different people, how it may actually be fine, or even beneficial to some! so thank you for sharing your perspective

Hey man, Why do you want to quit porn? What benefit will it give you? Why is it important to you? It takes some, (like me) years, to heal the addiction to porn and fantasizing about every attractive women you see. Porn is not inherently bad, don't turn this into an "evil" thing, what it can/does do is train your mind to over-sexualize, fantasize, and build false expectations of sexuality and sex. Fantasizing about Women, I don't think there is anything inherently wrong with it, for me it became a problem when I didn't know how to deal with it, it was overwhelming, took over my mind, and I didn't know how to stop it, it became a problem then. Develop your own understanding of sex and sexuality through experimentation and experience. Authentic to you, you may view it slightly, or very differently then others on this forum, me, or anyone you know, that's okay. As far as breaking the habit, think about it this way, you have built up momentum for ten years with this habit, its like trying to steer a shipping barge. it takes time, it take consistency and persistence. Dont shame yourself or guilt yourself if you haven't "kicked the habit" in a few weeks, months, or even years.

This whole thread is funny to watch unfold. people sharing perspectives, trying to understand the other Others taking one or two sentences out of context and demonizing that limited part of the perspective given. And.. People asking a question, not to understand, but just to tell the other, nope, I am right, and you are wrong!

How long is "fairly long"?

Its your life. ask yourself the question here are a few starter questions. What do I really want out of life? What am I authentically pulled to? What important questions about my life am I NOT asking?

Take a deep breath and realize that you can love yourself through this. One time, I foolishly took 14 grams of mushrooms, at 11:00 P.M. I had three roommates, two of which were home. I watched Leo's guided exercise for realizing you are God, and had quite a deep experience, right afterwards, my mind snapped, repressed and unconscious behaviors surfaced and took over, as my ego took control. For the next three hours I was screaming and yelling, barging into my roommates rooms, nearly got the police called on me, among other things. completely swept up in the phenomena of the trip. Eventually I started coming down, and with it... Waves of regret, shame, guilt, physical and mental pain, as I cleaned up the mess I made, changed my clothes, showered, and lay there, still tripping balls. It was some of the most palpable regret I have felt in my entire life. Just knowing how badly I had messed up, knowing that I may have ruined my relationship with my roommates, not knowing if anything was going to be okay. for Hours I lay there, and even the next days and weeks, waves of regret washed over me, as I thought of that experience. I am so proud of how I handled the waves of emotion and feeling, here's what I did. As I lay there, or throughout my days post trip, as a wave would come I would tell myself... "Paul, I love you, I will stay with you through this." "Paul, This hurts, feel it, go deep into it, cry if you want to, I wont abandon you." "Paul, You made mistakes, but I still love you, any mistakes you make cannot change how much I love you." "Paul, someday, you are going to look back with gratitude that it wasn't worse." "Paul, in a million years, your body wont exist, your mind may not exist, no one will know you existed, there's peace in that." You are going to be okay. BE the love YOU need right NOW.

During your life, have you ever had a direct experience of reality, an expansion of consciousness, or some other mystical experience, that was awakened by music? When I was a kid, in church, there was, what I now look back on as a direct experience of infinite love. It was during the worship service, I do not remember the music that was playing, but it was on the theme of the "Love of God" (The Christian God.) I was curled up in a fetal position with my chest over my knees and eyes closed, over and over I repeated "I love you, I Love you, I Love you." Over and over and over. I didn't know what or who I was saying it too, I was completely caught up in the moment. This went on for a few minutes, till suddenly, over the course of a minute or two, I started weeping as my consciousness expanded to fill the whole room. I was not "Conscious OF" the whole room "I" Was the entire bubble of awareness, I could "feel" or "see" movement of "Others" in the church, I could look back at my body still curled up, and was washed with waves of divine Love. it was so much, too much for my body to handle, it felt agonizingly beautiful, like laying under Niagara falls and letting the millions of tons of water pound over me. Another experience was later on, after I had graduated highschool, dabbled in psychedelics, and even had insights into life and reality. But this time I Was sober, in a dark spot, so alone, so confused, so lost. I didn't know what to do, I knew I needed to move to a different city, I was working two unfulfilling jobs to save the money. Later at night, I was sitting their in my suffering, listening to old worship music, not the kind that's preaching at you, but ones that are more abstract using words to point to something greater than words alone. (Specifically the song is "In over my head" by Jenn Johnson.) In my mind, I reached out, "God, I need help, I cant do this alone, I don't even know what I am doing or what to do, please..." I opened my heart and mind to whatever was about to happen. And soon after, slowly at first, then stronger and stronger, waves of energy started pulsating through me and the room. Love. Love in its full power, love that stripped my fears away, Love that dropped my jaw open because I was in such Awe. Love that didn't even make "sense." Love that I couldn't hold, or conceptualize. Love so big it hurt. And for five minutes, ten minutes, fifteen minutes or so, I sat there, basking in these waves of Love, as tears dripped off my face. I knew that it was going to be okay. The difficulty wouldn't be able to stop me because I have Love. the pain, suffering, uncertainty, could never stop me fully, because I didn't just have love, I AM LOVE.

What is the least toxic, highest quality liquid I can dissolve DMT crystals into for vaping?

Thanks for pointing me in that direction. My original question is really biased. Based only on what I had heard from others, I assumed that vaping with E-Juice was the only other option. A Higher quality question would have been. What is the most effective way to smoke/vape NN-DMT Also shows my lack of research. Oof.

Have you used it?

I have a VaporGenie, which definitely works, but it’s difficult for me to dose it correctly. wanted to try different methods to find one that works best for me. Thank you

With your first point, I agree with you, I am still learning to see the differences in peoples psychology, instead of just mirrors of my self, thank you for drawing my attention to that. Case to case, it will be different, for me, vs anyone else. Similarities? possibly. Differences as well? probably. Another good point. I didn't intent to come across as accusatory as I did. Thanks for responding with such class

man oh man, I am still learning to question. One of my favorites right now is "What is the difference between authentic desire and inauthentic desire? I don't know, maybe, maybe not, could be a lot of factors. As far as conversations not lasting long, its also possible that others are just not as interested into the topic being broached I am not an authority to say whether or not your questions are good or bad, I don't know every question you have ever asked. Maybe besides this thread? No.

That's amazing, sounds overwhelming for a 12 year old. You still a musician?

I definitely get where you are coming from, and I agree, ultimately there is nothing wrong with masturbating or porn. To some, myself included, its similar to.. (for example) telling an alcoholic, there's nothing wrong with drinking once in a while. Or to a heroin addict, there's nothing wrong with doing heroin once in a while. Don't get me wrong.. Heroin and Drinking are on a different level, but the structure is similar. to some, Porn and Masturbation is a serious problem, and being let off the hook from someone they look up to, may actually do more harm then good. This is a great point. Introspection is especially effective in healing this.

Hey brother, I've been there, from the ages 14-21, daily, sometimes multiple times a day, I would watch porn and masturbate. It became a coping mechanism for me. I was so unhappy, with so little purpose in my life, I didn't know what I wanted, what I liked or didn't like, and I was playing the victim ALL the time. that lead to a waterfall of negative emotions that I did my best to avoid. Porn and masturbation = instant pleasure. its like a drug. and I was using it to escape the life I had created for myself. It wasn't till after I was introduced to personal development and psychedelics that the idea of quitting, or at least minimizing my habit become a possibility. (I was 20 then) so I tried to quit, hundreds of times, and failed, hundreds of times. here are the top reasons I failed so many times. 1. I repressed my sexual urges instead of processing them. 2. I labeled Porn, Masturbation, Orgasm, as "bad" as things to avoid, as things to demonize. 3. I was thinking about "Stopping PMO" instead of focusing on what I wanted in life, so basically I was thinking about it all the time, and what we focus on, grows.) 4. I determined the success of my healing by the amount of days I had gone without porn or masturbation. 5. I didn't fill the space, time, and energy, left over from quitting. 6. Not journaling about WHY I relapsed/Not learning from Relapse. 7. Resisting Boners and natural sexual urges. 8. I didn't do proper research to understand this problem theoretically. By realizing WHY you want to quit, seeing HOW it will positively effect your life to heal this and move on, as well as the negative consequences of not quitting, and doing research into WHAT to do on a day to day basis, you can self-analyze, and figure out what works for you. I have seen a lot of people on this forum demonize quitting masturbating and porn, but if you intuit that it is important for you to heal it, don't let anyone stop you. You know better than anyone else what you need to do to heal yourself. And speaking from personal experience, it can radically change your life. Not so much will quitting porn and masturbation magically "Fix" everything, instead, you begin to face the things you have been avoiding by stroking your flesh rocket, repressed emotions, trauma, anything you have been running away from, as well as freeing up your mind to focus on creating the life you desire. I am 24, Porn and masturbation is not a problem any more, I don't feel any serious desire to watch porn or masturbate to escape, and when I do feel the urge, its okay, I don't take it very seriously, I allow myself to feel it. It is possible, and its amazing to live life without being as controlled by my dick. Here are some of the top resources that helped me. once again. DO NOT BLINDLY BELEIVE ANYTHING IN THESE VIDEOS OR THAT I SAID HERE. Experiment. Find what works FOR YOU. 1. This whole series (sexual self-mastery) is gold, not all of it fit me, but a lot of it helped. 2. This channel can be helpful (be careful, he has a lot of wisdom, but just... be careful) Stay strong. You've got this

That’s a great question, I’ve often wondered the same. Why do you thinkpeace is easier to find in nature?

Ask higher quality questions.

Wow. sober?

What is your favorite part about X, and what is your least favorite part? What was the best part of your week? if you had to choose between three eyes, or three ears, which would you choose? If you could wake up in any place in the world tomorrow morning, where would you choose to be? If they are talking about something you find interesting: how did you get started with X?

To Live Authentically, to be true to my self, remain vigilant against the desire to fit in, or seek approval from others, to choose Love of authenticity, over fear of rejection and being abandoned.