Bogdan

@Breakingthewall are you aware/do you agree you're imagining this structure, and it's relative openness? Cause the "structure" i see is an infinite one.

I call it the Christmas Tree of Yes and No. Or the Tree of Paradox. It's an attempt to explain why explaining non-duality through language is so tricky, and why the ego gets so tripped up in technical metaphysical terms. So for ANY conclusion that we can reach through language (including this one), the following meta-answer can be applied: Yes. No. Both yes and No. Neither yes nor no. Both both yes and no AND neither yes nor no. Neither both yes and no NOR neither yes nor no. Both Both both yes and no AND neither yes nor no and Neither both yes and no NOR neither yes nor no. Etc, to infinity It's an attempt to explain why it's not enough to just hear the correct metaphysical pointers, such as: God is Love God is Infinity God is Reality God is Nothing God is Everything Etc Because spoken through language, there will always be a +1 to be added by the ego. This points to the ego's infinite capacity for BS and mental masturbation. God is Infinity. "Oh yeah? Well, then x and y are not God, because they are finite" The point i am trying to make is that even the very fact that the ego can deny infinity infinitely, paradoxically leads to infinity. Infinity is SO obvious, and yet the Christmas Tree of Yes and No applies even to this statement. And to this one, etc 😆 Let's have some fun with it, and i challenge you guys to apply the Christmas Tree of Yes and No appropriately: "Infinity is Infinite" Yes - uhm... Duh! No - infinity cannot be truly infinite, because by definition it cannot be finite, because then it would not be infinite - YES - within this circular logic, that seems to be correct, because we can force this twisted perspective, and NO - Infinity is paradoxical, because it MUST contain even impossibilities, things it cannot do and be, cause otherwise it wouldn't be truly infinite - YES - because by definition it also contains "must" AND "mustn't", things jt is forced to be AND NO because bla bla bla I already feel stupid and dizzy just for trying to engage with this kind of logic. So that's why i find it annoying to keep talking about non-duality, what this teacher said and what that teacher said. (Paradoxically i also love it) Because the whole fun is for everyone to access infinity more and more, and also find their OWN original language to express and dance AROUND these old timeless truths, instead of mindlessly memorizing more and more wordy explanations from various teachers. So if you come to me with a non-dual CONCLUSION, the Tree of Paradox applies, so INFINITY IS THE ONLY ANSWER, REALLY! And so it's ultimately obvious if your ego is getting tripped up somewhere in the branches of the Tree. (notice how even this can turn into an endless ego BS debate, even this can be used by the ego to pretend like there isn't an infinite Truth) But that's why i insist - there is ONLY Nothing, and Nothing IS Infinity, cause it's the Only ingredient that doesn't need anything to be infinite. You don't need fancy explanations of Creation! There is only Zero - by definition, there is only One Zero. (Because there is NO difference between one zero, zero zeros, 365 zeros or infinite zeros) "One" exists, BECAUSE that's what Zero IS - One of "itself" - One of it's Infinite Self. By the same Logic, that "creates" the illusion of 2 - Zero AND One. That's WHY 3, 4, 5 ... That's WHY Infinity appears also as infinite finitudes, and that's why Nothing is Everything. But the Truth is One - Zero. (Infinity) And perhaps the Tree can help some to see how inescapable and obvious infinity is. Final thought: Nothing is Infinity, Everything is Infinity, Zero is Infinity, One, Two, Three, all are Infinity! Nothing... But LOVE! 😆😆😆♥️

@kbone all good, bro! I didn't mean to speak quite as aggressively. Sorry for that. I had a stressed body that day, lol @Breakingthewall i think i can sort of see your perspective. It's just that we're using language and it's sooo tricky😆 because openness, closeness, spaciousness, and the other terms you used instead of love and nothing are also dualistic, no? The way i see it is that every single word has a dualistic nature, and every single "word", is a "thing" - and each and every "thing" is Absolute "proof" or meta-proof of Infinity. Cause there is no "thing" that is NOT infinity, Absolutely speaking. So to me, what you're saying kinda sounds like "no, infinity and infinity are misleading terms, i like to say that there is infinite infinity from where infinity is infinite, and then there is finite infinity, from where infinity is infinitely finite" Or something like that 😆 (i'm not trying to be mean btw) But that's why i'm like... "Huh?... Well, i'm not sure how to reply to that, cause i mean, it's not wrong, but to me that is also not right either"

True flexibility is obtained in years, cause you want to get to the point where you can wake up and simply do the pose you want without warming up. That's acquired flexibility To be comfortable in the lotus, you need to be able to go beyond the lotus, so that the lotus itself is not your maximum. You want zero tension, especially if you wanna sit for long periods of time in one pose. Personally i just switch between a few comfy positions, mostly sitting on a comfy chair or couch. If you wanna increase flexibility as an adult, especially without having it as a child, i recommend the following resources: Range of Strength (Lucas Hardie) Emmett Louis (the splits wizard) Also for general spine health check out the GOAT - David Weck

Props to you for reaching out for help. All these feelings are normal, there is nothing wrong with you. On the contrary, consciousness is always "working" perfectly. In my experience, all these feelings of misery have a good explanation, and focusing on what matters usually brings relief. It just can feel intense sometimes, before another breakthrough happens, and that's ok. Any endeavor is spent mostly on plateaus. Even muscle growth happens in spurts. You cannot maintain the high volume and intensity necessary for rapid growth all the time. The maintenance/slow growth periods also serve the purpose of adapting the tendons, ligaments, bones etc for more growth. Make sure the body is well rested and fed before you ask a lot of it. It seems you got a sufficient handle on it tho, and i'm no therapist, so i will go ahead and share what i can about my experience maybe it will help you in the long term. I've had moments like these recently, as i was making an effort to expose myself to more experiences. I found them extremely valuable, because it put me face to face with the structure of my ego. This fragility in the face of seemingly normal circumstances were like a wake up call for me, because i was still constructing a LOT of fantasies, and not being serious enough about the work of deepening consciousness, and loving truth (or deconstructing the ego so it becomes more transparent, so that the value of loving truth can actualize) Part of the fantasy was that i was super hard working, burnt out by doing too much spiritual work, when in fact, i kept making bad survival decisions that were making my life tired and miserable. Ultimately, i noticed that when i am actually conscious that i am distracting myself, i simply take the steps necessary to maintain focus and calm down the suffering ego mind. It's kinda sad and kinda beautiful and also logical how the ego seems to need to suffer enough to really get fed up and really look at, really face how it is creating the mental suffering and distraction. It's tricky cause the reasons it creates are so real and all-encompassing from those states of consciousness. But if i learned something in the last 10 years, it's just how right Leo is to emphasize long meditation retreats. Even just knowing that i have retreats scheduled in my year helps with re-gaining presence and focus in the face of the monkey mind going nuts. Really hope this helps a bit. Spirituality is a solo adventure, but survival doesn't have to be

@Sugarcoat thanks 😽 @Breakingthewall@kbone sorry @Breakingthewall, i didn't mean to tag you, and i can't untag for some reason. @kbone sure, conditioned fear is a potent ego memory and reason to remain a victim, that doesn't let focus rest on what is True, Present, because the truth is that your true Self, which is Love, Is all the things that the ego fears and hates, because it thinks those things will cause suffering and death. But honestly i find it weird that you are asking me this, when Leo has so much content on these topics, and when we are supposed to contemplate these things on our own. Perhaps you already believed you knew the answer, and wanted to see if we're in the same page, or perhaps you just liked what i wrote and wanted to hear more answers in my style of answering But i see quite a lot of questions being asked that have obviously not been contemplated enough in private before asking, like a reliance on outside authority. So that's why i'm questioning where your question is coming from.

@Breakingthewall i am most likely a narcissist, lol 😆♥️ wish you well

@Breakingthewall it's funny, cause you just named that which you deem unnameable (you called it unnameable). Idk bro, by this point i think we are derailing the topic of Emil's trip too much, maybe we can start another forum topic on this subject. I find you'r metaphysics to be inaccurate and entangled. I'm not interested in debating you, but the idea of trying to see if i can reply to your ideas sounds fun

@Breakingthewall because... Nothing, by definition, is INFINITE. Therefore, it's not relative nothing. It simply infinity itself. Infinity HAS/IS Everything ! Nothing, Anything, Everything, meaning, no-meaning, etc, etc, etc.

@Breakingthewall Nothing has no meaning precisely because it's infinite. Meaning is a relative ego-mind attempt at dividing Reality, which is like trying yo use a scalpel to divide a Galaxy. Of course you can't apply a relative notion, such as meaning, to Infinity, aka Absolute Nothing.

@Breakingthewall No, because actual Nothing is Infinite, so it's not nothing, as in what the mind calls nothing, which simply means that which is not relevant for survival. That is a shallow use of the word nothing. I am using language here, and i am explicitly telling you that i am referring to metaphysical Nothing, which is not nothing, but the Totality of Infinity itself. It's like this example i like to give - what is an infinite bottle? Is it a really really big bottle? Is it still a bottle? No! It's the Totality of Infinity. And Nothing, Something, Everything and Anything are exactly and precisely the SAME "thing" - Infinity.

@Breakingthewall i'm referring to Absolute Nothing, which IS infinite, which is Unlimited, which is Reality, which is Total, which is Everything, including relative nothing and relative everything, which are Absolute illusions. I'm just talking about infinity. Which is my experience right now, when i'm in a transparent enough state of C.

@Sugarcoat (sorry my phone doesn't let me edit these text boxes out) Actualized.org, lol 😆 No, but it's tricky for me to answer, since i've only stumbled upon spiritual teachings 10 years ago, when i was 19. So only now i'm starting to be ABLE to become serious about all this stuff. I don't think that there is one particular thing that has had the most profound impact. Cause it also depends if you're asking about raising my baseline of consciousness. Leo emphasizes the importance of long meditation retreats, and in retrospect, the 2 vipassana retreats i attended really did boost my consciousness a lot. I attempted a few more solo retreats, but too many survival problems and a severe lack of maturity made me distract myself and quit doing them seriously enough. I was only able to do 1-3 day long meditation retreats since, and only very recently i realized i've been living like a fool, and that centering my life around loving Truth requires infinitely more seriousness, focus and discipline. If you're asking what raised my consciousness acutely the most, that's easy, high doses of psychedelics, lol. But not having the requisite baseline of consciousness and sufficient ego deconstruction, or transparency, as i am starting to call it, or sober discipline, created a LOT of suffering and not understanding why i'm getting the results i was getting. Raising my intelligence in the areas where i was lacking it the most was/is incredibly painful I was gonna mention contemplating infinity a lot, but i don't know that it raised my consciousness, it certainly helped develop the intelligence around understanding the theory better. Yeah. I don't have any better answers at the moment but Leo has plenty of content on this. Also don't underestimate his blog and forum replies. I must say, the more i am super focused on what is continuous in Reality, the more i feel conscious that i am/ i am surrounded by - infinite love. And the more it makes me yearn to just bask in this Truth, with no need to think. Which funnily enough activates thinking that is annoyed that i still have survival struggles, distracting from Truth lol. But it's becoming more transparent, and love shines through that challenge as well.

@Sugarcoat So, my explanation will be a bit all over the place - ultimately if you follow Leo's work, (which will also point you to the importance of studying other relevant teachers), do hardcore meditation retreats, and use psychedelics and self inquiry and deconstruct the ego and have tons of mystical experiences you'll be able to understand for yourself better than anyone could ever explain. But here goes - the way i understand it is that Reality has a sort of infinite Logic to it. And basically if you ask powerful enough questions, you will eventually find infinity/Love/Reality/Truth in anything. And so i suppose we could start by asking "what is anything?", or what is A THING? I sat with this question for years - and had the insight that i have no fucking clue, because i need an infinite chain of causality to explain ANY particular "thing". Because no one "thing" or "form" can really have an existence of it's own, separate from Infinity, things are actually infinity itself. Basically any "object" is actually how infinity looks and sounds and feels like, as if from the outside. Every "thing" is a distinction made in Reality, by the instrument of the survival mind. The survival mind is also paradoxically a distinction made by the survival mind. Then we can sort of ask - well, then... every thing is actually EVERYTHING? What type of "thing" can be paradoxically everything and not everything at once like that? This is where human language starts to really break down. The answer is Paradoxical. NO THING. Literally there is NO "thing" that can do or be everything. A bottle is by definition (of the human mind) a bottle, and not anything else But another way to read that sentence is Nothing CAN Do/Be Everything. So... In Reality, there are no multiple things. There is just one big fat, Ultimate Thing of All Things - Anything/Everything/Nothing. It's just that the human mind's idea of relative nothing does not realize that Real Nothing is Infinite. In the Imaginary Time Before Time, what was there? Of course it's infinitely logical that the answer is Nothing. Nothing is the only "thing" that "needs nothing" to exist. And luckily, Nothing "HAS" Nothing 🤣 AND SO IT "IS/Was" Thing is (<--- LOL, the cosmic joke baked into language) by the same Logic, Nothing needs nothing to be anything, everything, infinite. When you take any "thing" and make it infinite, it stops being that finite thing, and it becomes Infinity itself. So Nothing was never "just nothing". It always was Infinity, therefore it always was both nothing and everything, and every other duality/nonduality in infinity. So it was, is, and always will be the case, that infinity is the only possibility. Because Nothing Always Was, Is And Will Be - INFINITY. See the infinite logic? By that same logic we can contemplate the twisted, crazy nature of infinity, and realize, as Leo wonderfully explained, that Infinity has, by definition, infinite EVERYTHING - including Intelligence, Wisdom, Consciousness, Will, Power, etc. And so, we could say, that it Always "knew" what is THE Most Awesome, Most Perfect, THE Absolute Highest State, THE Best fuckin "THING" that IT can ("CHOOSE to") BE What is that THING? Infinite Self-Love, of course!!! It's perfectly logical!!! But... What comes next is an attempt to explain why explaining through human language any further is simply dumb and weird and pointless: THERE IS NO SUCH "THING" - Any such "permanent thing" leads to evil, aka an eternal prison. (And yet it needs to ALSO paradoxically be an eternal prison, or it wouldn't be infinite) So the Highest Gift it could ever give itself is to ... Not have a Self. To be Absolutely... Selfless NOTHING. (And yet again it also has to have a self to be infinite, hence you are here reading this) But it already was Nothing, so it didn't even have to choose, cause it doesn't even have a self that can choose, and yet that's what the selfless self HAD TO choose, by both choosing and not choosing to have to and not have to choose, because it Already Always was Nothing, etc TO INFINITY!!! POINT IS Nothing IS Reality, Nothing IS Truth, Nothing IS Infinity, Nothing IS All "Finitudes", Nothing IS The Highest Love. Hence Reality is Love Lol But still, all of what i said can be corrupted by ego, from this human state of Consciousness, so like i said, we all gotta dig deep for our...selves, cause otherwise language just turns into mush, sort of how it did here at the end. Did any of it make sense? Final insight: Any dualistic conclusion has the following infinite answer: Yes. No. Yes and no. Neither yes nor No. Both yes and no and neither yes nor no. Neither yes and no and neither yes nor no. Both both yes and no and either yes nor no, and neither yes and no and neither yes nor no. Etc etc etc See infinity? 😊♥️

Yes. But i'm really curious, why are you asking like that?

@emil1234 glad i could be of help! ♥️ Thank you for your work!

Here is my suspicion: At some point in any trip, infinite love constructs the ego "again". That sentence only makes sense from this side of the construction. For the trip to make sense to the human ego, it must have certain memories of it, and the illusion of finitude must become solid enough "once again". The interpretation of Aloneness and Existence cannot not be negative to the ego, because they are actually memories of infinite Love, from the "other side", as if "before" the ego went through reconfiguration and forgetting etc. And to the ego, infinite Love will always be in a way negative, cause it means total annihilation. So in a twisted way, maybe it projects this onto God. But the thing is, the Aloneness of God is Infinite. And any THING that is infinite, stops being a "thing", and it simply turns into infinite Love. This also answers, in my current view, the question of God being infinite hate, or stuff like that. An infinite bottle stops being a bottle, and simply turns/merges back into being infinity itself. Same with infinite hate, an infinite finger, infinite nothing, infinite aloneness, etc. Does that make sense? I think that might be the reason you don't remember, why you went out of the singularity, looking for things outside yourself. Because you increased the Love so much, you "saw" that you wanna forget, that that's how you wanna trick yourself, or that that's the most loving thing you could do. And by definition, you cannot remember what you made yourself forget 😁 Perhaps

That's one interpretation. Another would be that the science that was done was on people who eat both fats and sugar, so of course those numbers would say so. I don't have experience with physiology and science, to have an opinion about your health markers From what i know, and I'm just a guy with access to the internet, there is no telling if this way of eating will clog up your arteries in time, or damage the mitochondria, or create diabetes etc. It seems to depend on so many factors, genetics etc. And doing quality carnivore, or any proper, useful nutrition studies is incredibly hard to do on humans. So we will find out in the next hundreds of years possibly 😂 but for those who it works for, it SEEMS to work amazingly. And there are plenty of carnivore doctors and scientists who talk about blood work. I've listened to a few years of vegan doctors with their arguments, and I've listened now to almost a couple years of carnivore doctors explaining their stuff. Honestly, the carnivores seem way more scientifically accurate and they actually did thoroughly answer many of my vegan questions, although they also seem kinda intellectually lazy, and wanna protect their tribes way, which is understandable. There is one carnivore doctor that stands out to me, Sean O'Mara. He promotes carnivore with the addition of a diversity of fermented plant foods. He argues that that's the best way to consume plants, because they are beneficial when fermented. My interpretation: fat + sugar + improperly or overly processed plants lead to the clogging up of the vessels, joints, organs of the body with fat and muck and gunk and dirt and sandy, glassy scratchy crystals (dirt) and that in time depletes the body of nutrients and damages the tissues. Fast isn't the problem, we work best eating fatty meat, but low carb, for the reason above. And so plants seem to work best when we use our brain to process them properly, not eating them raw, like peasants eating straight dirt 😂 But i dunno what's the truth of this matter.

@Schizophonia apparently the problem with that is that high fat high carb creates a lot of damage. Theoretically the body never had in it's evolution access to hundreds of grams of carbs every day, on top of loads of fat. I mean from the research i've done, if one has a nice fatty meal, even a little bit of sugar creates inflammation and damage. This "Randall cycle" activates and stuff. Which is great for survival, but not great for modern access to food. And depending on your genetics and diet and sleep and human connection etc, if constantly day in day out ur eating lots of carbs and fats, you might clog your arteries, or get cancer, diabetes, or be quite resilient until ur super old, who knows. But some damage is still being done at some level. From my understanding.

Here's my perspective: On a carnivore diet, fat is just as important as protein. A good starting point for the macros is a 1-1 ratio of protein to fat, in grams. So a nice fatty cut of ribeye is usually that. There is nothing wrong with eating a TON of protein on a carnivore diet. The problems appear when high amounts of fats AND high amounts of carbs are all present in the bloodstream at the same time, along with that protein. That's why eating a high carb diet ideally works with as little fat as you can tolerate. Literally just enough to have hormones. I still think it damages you long-term in some ways, and this diet feels like shit for most people. Imagine how it feels to be on a standard clean bodybuilding diet. On a meat-based diet, in the absence of carbs, all of a sudden the cells can breathe freely just the one energy source, the one they've been the most familiar with for millions of years - fat. Although most people go through a tough adaptation period. Some things really do take years to heal on their own, and some things really don't heal on their own and are not fixable with diet. I remember how if felt to not understand that, and think it sounds stupid. But from what i see, for many people it does take 2+, even 4+ years on a strict, high-fat, carnivore/lion diet to heal. But it does happen a lot, i've looked at every good and bad case of the diet i've found in the past year and a half. so, while some health issues might not be fixable through diet alone, I still feel the best on a high fat, carnivore ish diet. I still eat whatever i want, but my intuition more often than not chooses carnivore. My skin is good, my sweat smells nice, my arthritis pain is gone and my poops are fantastic and i struggled with that all my life. Eating enough fat is crucial tho. i am gathering money to work with different carnivore specialists to find out if i have mold disease or chronic inflammatory disease or parasites and shit. i'm excited to work with people such as Judy Cho. I'll link a video here:

I am still young and working through my unique developmental deficiencies and human problems, and i am dedicated to going all the way spiritually. It is such a long process, because the foundation needs to be solid. I have been watching Leo for about 8 years. I found out about spirituality 10 years ago. I'm just getting started. Recently i've spent time with Ayahuasca people. They are so full of self deception it's crazy! If it were not for (mostly) Leo's videos i would've been sucked into cults, gotten into horrible relationships, would've gotten deep into debilitating addiction, or even suicide. As much as i love advanced metaphysics, practical videos are welcome and essential, imo.

Reading trip reports like these always brings me to tears. Thank you for sharing, @Daniel123 !

I have recently interacted with this organization called Inner Mastery, because it was the only way of me to get ahold of Ayahuasca, 5-meo, San Pedro etc. While I identified problems with how some facilitators do their thing, I was wondering if there are any ways of hosting these types of retreats in a healthy way. I am questioning wether or not providing people with psychedelics is a good thing. Many of these people said that they are grateful for the opportunity of taking these psychedelics, and the human connection, but then again that comes from selfishness, does it not? Let's say it's done in countries where it's legal. How can it be done consciously, if at all? (P.s. i have already watched Adeptus' videos. I've talked to people from inside the organization and those interviews do not paint the full picture. I'm interested in a broader perspective moreso than analyzing this particular organization)

I am in Romania now. Should I leave the country asap, or am I just paranoid?