WonderSeeker

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Everything posted by WonderSeeker

  1. @siasatmadar In the mid-term, you'll pull through this phase. It can happen in as little as a few days. For me I was depressed just 2 months ago. I had heartache. I felt like I was no good socially and that I'd never get this "women-thing" handled. Now I'm approaching women in public and gaining social momentum by being around people as much as I possibly can. Do your best to be grateful for the experience that you created with that women. It seems like you left her in a better state than you found her, and you got to experience sex for the first time. Good for you! I think as men we tend to be too hard on ourselves. I'd say just nurture yourself for a little while man. Get a notepad and do some emotional journaling to transfer the crap in your head onto paper and then burn the paper. From one brother to another, you've got this.
  2. For starters, I'm a masters student and writing a book (part of my life purpose) that has to do with the geography I'm in, so I'm probably gonna stay for another couple years before transferring to a bigger city. But I get the idea. Just a personal note: I'm sorta pissed that I wasted my undergrad not going out and networking more. I had a lot of social trauma when I was younger, so it's been a long time coming in peeling away the layers to get back to my natural, sexual self. My school is 10,000+ and now that I'm getting solid seduction coaching and just beginning to take action, I plan to talk to lots of girls this fall. @ivankiss Where you at?
  3. @Leo Gura @mmKay Moving is not an option for me. I'm not sure if this will change anything, but I'm a college student in a college town. In the fall there will be a huge influx of people. I've never tried networking before. I'm kicking myself for not asking for Instagrams from the women I've approached because even though they had bf's I could sense that they were still into me. This is good advice, thanks. I've only just started "pickup" and done only a couple of approaches. Both said they were seeing people but were open and really added to the conversation. I get what some of you are saying about "word getting out about this pickup guy," but I feel like that might discourage me from trying. Plus, I'm genuine in my interactions. I am not trying to be this pimpy player-dude, so I don't think it will come off the wrong way, whether it's with individuals or the social community at large. But I'm still a noob at this, so what do I know?!
  4. ^That, and simultaneously staying on your purpose. As long as you don't make her your purpose, and you occasionally sacrifice time with her by saying "no, I have to do XYZ in order to pursue my calling," she will find that hot and she will fall for you even harder.
  5. Ken Wilber's 3-2-1 shadow work as well as integral journaling Shadow Dance on Leo's book list (haven't read it yet but assume it works) Meditation and binaural beats can bring up repressed 'stuff' naturally Psycho-Cybernetics, read slowly and implemented correctly, can seriously help too Hope this helps!
  6. @Terell Kirby It's simple. You have the pure intention of adding value to her life. You operate out of principles like, for example, leaving her better than you found her. The difference between conscious and unconscious pick-up, I think, is the degree of purity or transparency you show up with.
  7. @Javfly33 I highly recommend doing a 'blindspots' call with Jad T Jones. He's a very understanding, no-bullshit coach and will point out your weaknesses. Especially if you have an overactive mind. Also, just making conversation with strangers whenever possible helps build momentum. For example, if you're waiting at the bus stop and some dude is waiting too, just say "Hey what's up" or give a compliment and make conversation. You'd be amazed at how fast you can build momentum and then carry that into approaching women. Cheers~
  8. @Zion Pick only the TOP, #1 THING that you want to work on the most and start there. Me too. Then I realized that knowledge without action is like knowing the physical/chemical properties of bubble gum without chewing it. ...so now it's time to take ACTION ACTION ACTION and validate your knowledge. You make a 'definite decision' that you will work on X project for Y months. Commit on paper and tack it up where you will see it every day. Productivity books/seminars will help big-time if you can afford either. Right now I'm in a 6-month program with Jad T Jones, a seduction/productivity guru. Very knowledgable and wise teacher. Maybe some of his stuff will help.
  9. Under what environmental conditions do you do your best creative work? Do you have any unique productivity habits? Special music that you play to get yourself in the right mood/head-space? What are your go-to methods for producing quality work in a timely fashion? I'm writing a book and I'm trying out different music, nootropics, different rooms in the house, etc. Just wondering what other creatives find most helpful. Cheers!
  10. While searching the internet for articles on the concept of emergence, I found this PDF on systems thinking. http://peggyholman.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/06/211001pkSystems-Thinkerarticle.pdf I like how Peggy highlights the differentiate-integrate dynamic that Ken Wilber talks about. The article is also great for tracking your progress in self-actualization. Very often with this work we are plunged into emotional chaos, which means instability (differentiation) that ultimately leads to a higher, more robust integration of oneself. Geeky, but cool!
  11. @Leo Gura Been a viewer and have been doing various practices that I learned from you for about 18 months. Maybe this is just a style/personality thing, but I've found your character to be quite cold and brutal at times. There are pros to this, such as your straightforwardness, bluntness, and coherence. However, having an advanced truth presented to me in such a way would throw me off emotionally sometimes (chest would contract, etc.). I'm a feely person (INFP), so I'd have to wrestle with what you said through bodily contractions, which is of course fine because I'm watching at my own risk. But in the big-picture, I often just didn't perceive an expressive emotional understanding from you toward your viewers. I think that it would be great if you could integrate a sort of emotional empathy into your teachings that you project when you talk about these things, to the extent that you can without having to 'try' to communicate in a way that's not you. I feel as though by integrating both sides: brutal honesty with loving-compassion, an audience comprised of such diverse operating systems would appreciate that.
  12. I really like the way Jad explains how to be a man. You've got to subject yourself to rigorous testing. Conscious failure is good. It actually feels good too, because you get feedback that informs and supports future challenges. For the men out there reading this, accumulate scars!
  13. @Tombo Quick hands! Thanks for sharing. Side note: with that skill, you should DRUM the sound of the Actualized intro.
  14. This is just cringey. Caitlyn seems confused as to why she's running and has no original comments/ideas. Thoughts?
  15. @Preety_India So the issue then is that these "troll-comments" are publicly seen by other forum-goers, meaning your distress comes from the thought of others seeing the trollish comments. Is that accurate? I'm just trying to understand your situation. The more specific you can get, then I think the better you can address this. Also, you create your own reactions to these comments, whether you can help it or not. If everybody on this forum received the same comments that you do, then we would all have different reactions, be it disgust, embarrassment, indifference, etc. You're very intelligent, and assuming you're growing, this problem should be transient. You might still get trolled in the future, but you'll be less moved by it. Good point.
  16. Rampant commercialism and materialism. Small integrity, big profit. This has gotta create a serious cognitive dissonance for some repubs. I could see libertarians maybe being cool with her, but I don't know about those who ID as traditionalists.
  17. Hey, I'm sorry that you receive this crap and that it affects your emotional stability. How are 'they' actually 'attacking' your character? I know this isn't what you want to read, but I think the quoted line is the perfect thing to contemplate right now. I get the feeling, by reading your post and past ones similar to it, that you want Leo/mods to take action, and they probably will to the extent that they can. But I think you can also balance that with some self-reflection as well, so that trolls bother you less in the future. Trolls aren't worth your time. Forget them. Only focus on the comments that are conducive to your goals/desires. Your mind is a wonder.
  18. True, the more lenses you look at an issue from, the better the assessment will be. You'll know which levers to pull to get a better outcome.
  19. The problem here is that both spiritual and psychological approaches are, in a sense, right. However, each approach is right in a different way. If we take development into account (i.e., psychology), then we can look at a person and see where they are at. Ken Wilber once said "Spirituality is the highest level of any developmental line." If that's true, then spirituality will only work for those people who have developed to a point where they are ready for it. Until then, psychological approaches may be most appropriate. Once a healthy sense of self has been developed, the self can be transcended. At least, I believe that's how it works for most people. @Preety_India Ever heard of the phrase "spiritual bypassing"?
  20. What counts as 'wrong' and as 'Karma' are up to you. Though if you want to survive, you have to play the same game that the rest of society is playing. You can either do this unconsciously, by believing that 'wrong' and 'Karma' exist. Or you can do this consciously, by understanding that 'wrong' is relative and 'Karma' is a false proof of some divine fate. And if you do this consciously, you have the choice to be good or not. Choose wisely! It just is. Ever taken LSD? The answer is implicit. First, accept your confusion. There's going to need to be a lot of that if you want answers. Next, take action. Meditate, contemplate, etc. Be prepared to suffer for the truth.
  21. @Tim R Ayyye don't spoil the surprise
  22. @Swarnim Make it fun. Validate her interest by encouraging her. Your sister sounds lovely.
  23. @vedame Just do what's in front of you. Carve out time to nurture yourself, whatever that is for you. About 5 years ago, I found out that my ex had been cheating on me. It broke my heart. I had zero self-esteem. (It was my first relationship and I fell into the naive trap that it would 'be forever.') So for me, I got "pissed off for greatness" and did what I was passionate about, and that transformed me. Coping is fine, but you deserve to thrive too. Good luck!
  24. @Eternal Unity Uncover the insights for yourself. Practice spirituality hard for about 1-2 years. During that time, the notion of free will will become less and less true for you. At first, that will be shocking and super unsettling. You might get a feeling of heartache, like I did. But then you'll accept it and laugh about it. It's kind of like breaking up with a boyfriend or girlfriend, except you're just breaking up with an idea.