remember

that’s true god is the devil and the devil sometimes is god, it’s not only the dis-identification but also the mis-identification the false beliefs people follow, self biases and scapegoating and aggressiveness from that. i just listened to a song which has the lyrics: it’s not straight when it‘s crooked, it’s not where it was when its displaced, it’s not true when its a lie - i don’t know if that goes so well in english but it sets my head straight sometimes. stay honest ✊

although i must confess i understand sometimes why vegans oftentimes are perceived as having a rather radical position. if really talking about the cruelty and implication of what “killing“ means it must seem radical from the killers mind. it’s not open enough to accept killing, its not accepting enough torture, its not accepting enough hate, its not accepting enough, it’s much too radical in its no, its much to life neglecting. look exactly on what he sits - he sits on a killer. i guess that’s radical. for me he says with this, it’s ok if i can meditate on that, you can aswell.

i address this openly. why is a woman pushy if she does and a man not. i say openly i feel harassed by a sexual and political obscene fotograph - while the person who posted that just waited until he could make me remember the obscenery a second time. its not just a mistake but a quotation of what happened before. it‘s more than just randomly having a conversation about distaste.

no but this is personal, i‘m here for a while and i accept a lot, i also am rude sometimes but there are limits. which in this situation are overstepped. downplaying this is like saying it’s ok, it’s not a matter of taste but a matter of this communities values.

he won’t will you guys do something or won’t you? @Serotoninluvmaybe you would like to have a look, too.

well mod‘s are active in this thread.

well but his beliefs thoughts create someone elses reality, too. i guess i‘m ok to sometimes overlook rough spreach in the forum and play into it myself sometimes. i‘m ok that people here suffer and guys are disappointed over women i‘m ok with people having abstract dreams and visions and what not‘s but i‘m not ok with the harassment of me as a female with more leftwing ideas - it reminds me about how fascists treated women who where more left orientated - it’s utterly disgusting.

together with the photography - it said something like: this is my mustache i didn’t know how red it would get - the fotograph was in a manner like what i earlier pointed towards. just because it’s not spoken does not mean it‘s not aggressive. it’s pretty disgusting for a woman. it was about politics and beards the thread.

this is the video. it was more the text than the fotograf, the combination was pretty raw. sorry @Nahm you seemed to talk about another video.

he removed it after he got made conscious of it. but now he‘s quoting it with the queen video - knowing i remember the fotograf. its not the first time things like these go unaddressed under the radar.

@Nahm how so? because it’s ok to harass women in this forum?

he posted a really discriminating fotograph of himself a short while ago with a text that was not only misogynistic but also politically aggressive - it was implying a kuni lingus while pointing towards political left oriented women - he removed after being addressed, i feel personally harassed. hope this does not go under the radar.

if you see it, then why allow it? it’s the second time in a short while.

the thread is a gaslighting thread - it’s very disrespectful and full of appropriations. it shows how difficult it is to make a tasteful salad. but if everyone already spit inside i can also, can‘t i.

in this thread yes - but in every day occurrences male issues are mirror issues to male issues. let’s not bring this so much on a personal level again. @Preety_India has also written very much about her fears and what happened to her, it’s about some respect, she’s right - let’s not try to justify these thing by talking about dating issues. as long as women get harassed there won’t be any better dating platforms - or the platforms make it safe for women.

yes but that’s how frustration and separation is created - it’s addressing the structural problem and frustration between the genders. it’s basically that they don’t really learn to understand each other because everything is so blue.

well, i guess he also makes a legit point there. it’s about gender emancipation in general and trusting in people to being able to manage their love choices on their own. while women are held in the romance tower guys are held in the hierarchy pyramid.

that’s true in a sense - although we are still in it together never forget that empowerment also means to empower men or accept that they are reassured by your silence.

@Harikrishnan it’s still difficult to make the difference without emotional reassurance sometimes. don’t expect a topic like that to be only rationally discussed. written language also misses the presence of a person who gives other signs like smiles. i guess we got it now, thanks. but also adress guys if you realize they think backwardly you have more influence than we have. how sad it sounds.

also think about how loaded the topic is for us. it always plays into the posts. instead of getting defensive you could also make your position about male behavior clear you are not contented about. we often see the confrontation as more actual than what the threat of the dynamic is about - which plays into the separation dynamic. you probably are not part of the people who think women are responsible for being attacked by men or are you? then do you count yourself to the group of these people or do you have an opposition towards their behavior? sometimes women feel more safe if you make clear that you don’t belong to these kind of men, and then it’s possible to talk about real equality without playing into fear dynamics which will play out in these kinds of conversations.

@Preety_India you, too! ? and thank you so much for your detailed contribution to this thread, a lot of effort! your writing is always very reflected, i learned a lot about the situation and also realized some biases i have and how to resolve them. thanks to the guys, too. of course we get a little defensive with topics like this. we are not your enemies.

this is a great list - it’s very rational and goal orientated. i think even the guys could agree on this, as they probably also are sick of being victim to crime. i remember in one situation it was even a couple who went victim - imagining the girl you date would get victim, or the sister, or mother, what would guys do? i think it’s a list which would deserve to be discussed openly in any country where horrific crimes happen. and they must be discussed. i think the dating education would be also fun for men even, because they would feel far less helpless.

@Harikrishnan i flew over an article swiftly the other day, where a feminist wrote - male are not your enimy, this was about not putting male into one group but ignorant people. i have the problem here that i don’t know exactly where to put you, as you don’t take any stand on ignorant male. could be a self justification trap. you see we don’t want to be put into that hoard of the perpetrators, what then sometimes makes us one. also keep in mind that religion is the last to change usually. so this example is about completely other values - women try to protect the holiness of a place which is entitled to men. but men can’t protect the holiness of a womans body?

??

@Preety_India no it was about the killing of someone who rejects someone. or killing someone who defends themselves - i agree with you the psychology of a rapist is much more wracked than this. it’s not about justification although it seems like @Gnosis tries to make it an apology and unfortunately that’s how then a lot of male use it as an apology to not go into the other dynamics that keep them in a self justification loop. that’s probably why this forum is so much about learning to accept attacks towards the ego, for guys killing the ego seems to be a way to learn to think more logically to gain more empathy and being able to love more wholeheartedly without getting into contracted ego defense mode, which indeed is oftentimes the reason which then really is cutting a person off from the source of love. understanding the mechanisms between a physical, psychological or self perpetuated threat.