Beginner Mind

@Whatwhat No problem! You might also enjoy this track. Not as good as the first track I shared but it's decent.

@Serotoninluv I will give it a go. Thank you.

This whole passage is gold. And your experience with the snow is inspiring. There is definitely a "me" construct here, even though Nahm showed me that no such entity actually exists. This "me" somehow continually recreates itself from moment to moment. Perhaps I need to reflect a little more deeply on its non-existence? I want to experience this moment as it really is, free from the "me" and its distorted interpretation of this moment. The question "What is the nature of this moment when I'm not interpreting it?" was like a Zen koan that temporarily stopped my mind in its tracks, hence the peace that followed. I am unsure if the peace that was experienced was the real deal. It was so brief. Reminds me of my "psychosis" (which may or may not have been an actual psychosis, I don't know) from a few years ago. In the midst of mental anguish came uncontrollable shaking of my body, followed by crying, followed by uncontrollable laughter, and finally an experience of deep peace and a feeling of "all is well". These would appear to be the symptoms of an awakening experience and yet, one might dismiss them as being part of the "psychosis". But even if these glimpses were legit, they are in the past. All that matters is, am I at peace NOW?

@aklacor727 Nice!

I had an epiphany recently that relates to this. I was sitting in my room, looking around, and I realized that I was not experiencing the room as it actually exists. Rather, I'm experiencing my interpretation of the room, through the filter of labels and concepts. So the question arose: "What is the nature of this moment when I'm not interpreting it?" And for a brief moment, I experienced a sense of peace, perhaps "the peace that passes understanding" (I can't be sure), but it was very pleasant.

@Serotoninluv I like the idea of treating thoughts as mere appearances, but that's easier said than done because as you said, thoughts are very alluring. And some thoughts are harmless and seem absolutely true. For example, just a few minutes ago the thought occurred: "I don't know if I'll go for a walk today, I'm a little tired." As far as I can tell, there's nothing wrong with that thought. Seems true enough. Perhaps the key is to be vigilant in recognizing which thoughts are worthy of believing and which thoughts should be discarded?

@Nahm I think I've really underestimated how much time I spend thinking and how much I believe thoughts. There's often an internal dialogue, like "You shouldn't have done that" followed by another thought, "No doubt, that was a bad move." There's like multiple voices inside my head sometimes. It's kinda funny but also a little crazy. I'll try not to take my thoughts seriously in the coming hours and see how it goes.

@Nahm This stuff is a little over my head at the moment but maybe someday it'll click. I appreciate your guidance. :)

This is one of Eckhart Tolle's favorite songs. Enjoy:

"Flow with the Tao" sounds beautiful and all, but actually applying this wisdom is easier said than done. Knowing what direction the Tao is flowing is often not clear. How do you flow with something that isn't visible? When making an important life decision, how do you know what the Tao wants for you?

@Nahm So how would you define awakening?

@Emmaz Glad you liked it.

@Nahm I've heard Adyashanti say that awakening is as simple as not believing your next thought. Would you agree? I feel like that might be oversimplifying it.

@Nahm I am able to be aware of my hands and feet, but it seems I cannot be aware of awareness itself. Any suggestions? Or should I stick with alternative practices like allowing everything to be as it is (which I've recently re-discovered through Adyashanti's program "True Meditation")?

@Nahm So there's no "I", and yet, there's clearly something here. How to recognize that something and bring it to the forefront?

Lol. So was that the point of Nahm's exercise? To realize there's nothing there? No "me"?

Bringing awareness to the feet and hands was pretty straight forward, but being aware of the "I" was not so easy. I found nothing.

I think I understand what you're saying. Thanks.

So what does surrender look like for the person going out and, as you said, getting some bread and water and going outdoors?

A few years ago I experienced a "psychosis" or so I'm told (I'm skeptical of the diagnosis but whatever), and at one point during this experience I found myself in a police station in South Korea, experiencing extreme mental suffering. And then at some point my body started shaking uncontrollably, followed by a period of crying and uncontrollable laughter, followed by a sense of deep peace. Looking back on it, I believe what happened was a total surrender. So I know from experience how surrender can look in extreme circumstances, but I guess I'm wondering how surrender looks for the average joe just going about his day?

I'll continue to work with this practice. Thanks.

Man, I really need to get on the psychedelic bandwagon.

This reminds me of a minor epiphany I had yesterday. I was just sitting in my room, observing my environment and I suddenly realized that I was not experiencing the room nor the present moment as it actually is. I'm experiencing my interpretation of this moment. My experience of this moment is colored by my beliefs, opinions, concepts, etc. So the question arose, "What is the nature of this moment when I'm not interpreting it?" And for a brief moment, two seconds maybe, there was a sense of peace. I wish I could remain in that state permanently but it doesn't seem possible for me.

I'd love to experiment with psychedelics but unfortunately I don't have access to them.

So my life belongs to "Us"? Who is "Us"? I'm confused. Lol.