fridjonk

About that Ket trip. It was so powerful I didn't even see a reason in trying to make a trip report. I was not expecting such a powerful trip at all. It was in the 6-7g mushroom ballpark of intensity. But I resisted the breakthrough because I was just not repaired in the slightest. It was kind of nihilistic in a weird way, very nothingness-oriented since it is a dissociative after all, so one can expect that. I'm feeling a lucy trip coming up and I'll be more prepared for that one. I want to focus more on discovering my life purpose with that trip.

Yet you pick certain clothes over others, so notice how you actually do care about style. Just on a minimal scale.

It's not so simple. It's also how you resonate with the teacher, his manner of speaking, his attitude, his style of teaching, etc.

Just picked up 160mg ketamine which my friend kindly gave me, I'm about to head in right now. As I was picking it up we took a walk on the beach, it was one of the most surreal experiences of my life. We stood there in the star-lit sky with decent aurora, when all of the sudden, it became so unbelievably close to us and so intense that it felt like we were literally stood inside of them. And weirdly it was exactly where we were stood. I doubt many people have experienced this. Felt like God was revealing his true beauty to us. I can barely believe this just happened, and I've seen some intense aurora before. Perfect to experience this before a trip.

6:50 AM This new job is incredibly physically demanding so I didn't run this morning. But I will likely start to run once I'm a little in routine and more used to it.

7:00 AM Didn't manage to fall asleep until 2 AM so waking up at 5 was out of the picture. I did take a cold shower however and that woke me right up. I'm starting a new construction job today and am very excited about that. Let's get that 5 AM run tomorrow.

You're one step away from becoming a shepherd now! Join the club I've been meaning to get a bike for the longest time as well. Really want to get into mountain biking or downhilling, seems so exhilarating.

Second that. It feels better the more I eat of it.

Yesterday I dusted off the good ol' running shoes and went for a night run with my friend. The weather was incredible, fully star-lit sky and unbelievable aurora. Made me think back to the 5 AM running and so here we are. I'm going to try and restart that habit once again, as well as quitting caffeine. I've been consuming way too much of it lately and can feel it's impacting my sleep. I'll likely slowly start waking up sooner and will log it down here daily. I don't know if it will be too much with all the calisthenics I'm doing, so we shall see.

That's funny, the exact same year we re-roofed our barn and cowshed. I'm ok with heights as long as it's a supportive structure. Last year I was working on a new roof and we used a tractor shovel that was wiggling around with the slightest movement, now that was scary.

You just took on your fear, good job! I bet you feel a sense of relief from it. I just subscribed and am looking forward to seeing you grow.

When I first took a psychedelic, had an ego death, and broke out of atheism. I kept repeating "there's no way...it can't be!".

To me, cold showers feel as if I'd been stuck in a desert for many days without water, then coming across the cleanest cold water ever. The shock of the cold water feels so euphoric and almost mini orgasmic. I've noticed how it also loosens up your mind from being too "structural", thinking becomes more fluid and present.

If you actually go through the actualized channel, starting from let's say 2014. You'll notice the trend of how what topics Leo covers as time goes on. That's why actualized is such a diamond in the rough. It's a real-life example of a multiple-year journey that covers everything from self-esteem to emotional control to enlightenment.

@flume LOL A goat would climb that easily I'm sure.

@Striving for more Try some sort of breathing meditation like Kriya or Kundalini yoga so you get the energy moving throughout your body. Just abstaining from fapping is too difficult without replacing it with some sort of energy practice. Don't "try not to feel any shame", just notice there's nothing to feel bad about. Just tell yourself "well that was fun" after your session and move on. It's all about how you approach it.

Be precise in what you want and why you're doing it. The more bullshit you shed, the clearer your tunnel becomes. Then it just becomes about consistency and sticking to what you're after no matter what reason you come up with to not do it. Yet life unfolds in chapters and phases (see Leo's vid), so sometimes one just isn't motivated and that's totally fine. It comes back eventually, I've also found forcing it to be less productive.

These topics should honestly be banned from now on, they've been talked about so much. If you use the search function you'll find plenty of threads on this. Either jack off when you get an urge, then learn to pull yourself together. Or resist it and discipline your mind to stop thinking about sex, simple. Don't go complicating it more. You must be precise in what you want, If you want an apple, ask for an apple and not a pear.

I think Andy's negative voice is just as strong. It's just that he's gotten used to pushing through what he doesn't want to do. And that could be seen as discipline, doing what you don't want to do, but know that it would be for the betterment of yourself. Yet where does the line lie between wanting to go for a run vs sleeping in? It's that you must have a tunnel-like vision of where you're headed. A reason good enough that justifies pushing through discomfort. The clarity of the tunnel is the most important aspect. If you look at highly disciplined people like David Goggins, he struggles every day to go out for a run, as he described it "Sometimes I sit there for an hour looking at my shoes". It doesn't actually become easier, you become stronger.

I've logged off from the news now for quite some time, didn't really like how attached I had become to following all the turnings of the world. But one thing has not managed to hold itself from entering my awareness. A distant 4th relative of mine (within my imagined dream life) was climbing the K2 mountain in Pakistan, one of the most dangerous mountains in the world and second-largest. Three of them have now been lost there at the top for around 5 days, with the weather being so bad and cold, the military can't plan a rescue operation. It's pretty safe to say it's likely the end of the road for these 3 men. This really relates to the human desire of exploration, curiosity, and being willing to sacrifice your life for the love of your passion. This is after all the reason god creates duality, to explore and experience all aspects of life, dangerous and not. A piece of my dream died on that mountain, but it lost no substance to it since it's infinite and continues on dreaming. RIP. I've always loved mountain climbing and hiking in nature. But I just can't phantom the size of that 8600-meter mountain. The highest I've climbed is probably around 1500-meters. After all these news, it has sparked my inner mountaineer again. I'll be planing some climbs soon. My favorite mountains are ranked in this order and have fun pronouncing them, lol. Móskarðshnjúkar Bjarnarhafnarfjall Drápuhlíðarfjall Esjan My goal is to climb the two highest mountains in Iceland one day, Hvannadalshnúkur (2110 meters) and Öræfajökull (2109).

I think you misinterpreted what I meant.

The biggest blind spot would be to project your authority to any teacher.

Get a pullup bar and start hanging for 3 minutes each day.

I'm now one month into my calisthenics training and progress has been pretty good. I've hit a 20-second handstand so far using a wall for the kickup. I'm still working on the balance, not really been focused on the kickup so far. I'll start training that in maybe 1-2 weeks. I've also managed the L-sit hold for almost 7 seconds compared to 0 seconds a month ago. So it's all going pretty smoothly. Not attempted the muscle-up yet but I've been working at pullups a lot. At this rate, I'll probably reach all the goals I set for this year in 5-7 months. Besides the planche, that could take up to a year or two.