thesmileyone

It's just a jhana, there's more levels, sometimes I go up the jhanas sometimes not. It's a lovely place to be though and lately the bliss has been coming in more I have had more advanced jhanas occur and then samadhi's where time vanishes completely and I come out and hours have passed in what seemed like minutes. Still not enlightenment.

Even duality is a false illusion. It's a triality!

I think the problem is people are trying to think their way to enlightenment. What is the sound of one hand clapping? Describe the colour Red? If you can answer both of these, then maybe you are in luck at thinking your way to enlightenment.

In meditation it's just random thought for a few minutes, I ignore it. Note I do nirguna meditation, that is, I don't concentrate on something like the breathe or an object (saguna meditation), I just...be, and then pop into the void. In day to day life, I have a constant stream of music playing. I can change the track and the volume but for many many years I could not pause it. Only recently have I been able to pause it, and then it carries on playing at some point later on. Many sages and gurus told me the music was a gift, but i recently had insight that it was monkey mind manifesting as music to trick me.

Fear is a concept produced by the mind, it is not real.

Thanks people. I got through it. Went to bed early, noticed a change in conscious awareness the next day. Less negativity. Also for some reason my third eye are has been pulsing all day long and I have had a headache too.

What do you do on the path when you feel boredom / emptiness? NOTHING at all excites me anymore. The idea of new hobbies / friendships / relationships / events / etc all seem pointless to even bother doing because...everything is just..empty. I no longer watch tv, listen to music, watch movies and play video games because they also seem pointless, don't capture my attention and don't provide entertainment either, most of the time I am more aware when doing so that I am staring at a tv screen with pixels on it than getting engrossed in the content. The only thing that isn't boring is meditation due to the bliss felt more and more however I am aware that's a trap so I try not to do that too much. I'm not nihilistic though, I don't feel like my life as awareness is pointless, rather that everything external to me inside my awareness is pointless. I haven't been here before. I don't know what to do. I don't know if it's like, "the last refuges of the mind dissolving" or something like that, or just depression. Ie I don't know if it's a good or bad thing.

You get the trip you need though. Maybe you needed that experience to flush out the problems. Only in awareness can you fix them, so the drug likely did you a lot of good. But this is why I advocate the way I went, do hours of meditation first, so you get grounded in WHO YOU REALLY ARE because then you won't be afraid, as long as you can stay aware. Instead people are too quick to encourage people who have never meditated to throw themselves into 5meo (because it's cool!) on the street with no responsibility.

Eventually 1% will be monkey mind. It took me roughly 10k hours of meditation to get to the point where monkey mind only occurs for about 30 seconds - 3 mins worst case scenario. Of course, people don't want to do the work, due to being too influenced by our "pleasure on demand" society.

Describe the colour Red....

That was a huge problem for me [subtle brag] my IQ is 148 and 152 (done tests twice, with an auditor) [/subtle brag] My first idea of nonduality was totally intellectual and this means you can convince yourself, fool yourself even, to see the world in a fake nondual way, but of course it is not experiential based, so you are literally using your mind to create your own suffering in the moment. Would not recommend. Even now, years later, my mind still fights Self, not sure if this makes sense to people, but it's like the mind constantly trying to trick me (the observer) into nondual states that aren't nondual states but nondual fake states created by the mind. This is why I think psychedelics would be good for me, to just turn the default mode network (mind) off completely and then observe direct reality unfiltered. But my intuition says I need to do one trip and make it substantial. I am thinking it is likely going to be 5g of powerderd liberty caps + a MAIO inhibitor like harmala, in darkness, in a remote cabin somewhere in the wild.

I did my dissertation on the work of Quentin Tarantino, due to being compelled to watch then analyse his work...and like you it changed my life too, was actually about 3 months before my first awakening experience as it happens.

That's more likely to be the collective energy from the thousands of like minded people there at once than just Sadhguru.

I have / have had all of these, except for "utter blissness" bliss, and my K is unawakened apparently. I have also tried a lot to awaken it including this shaktipat necklace from Jan Esmann, years of K yoga...nada. Jan btw says you can't self realize without Kundalini, which is clearly incorrect. Fingers are tingling as we speak as it happens. What I do think, is that as the ego dissolves, or rather the conditionings dissolve, and Self within you gets clearer, your energy bodies develop too or become more noticable, and vice versa.

I really need to do 5meo.

I try and fulfil the boredom but lately nothing is fulfilling it. It's more conscious (ie eyes open, doing stuff) emptiness than boredom. Everything seems just completely pointless, including suicide, which I pondered, slightly. Everything is just like, going at its own rate, there's no "fun" anymore there just "is" without sounding cliche. The other thing is my Grandad died last week and the whole family is still upset about it but I didn't even shed one tear. Grief seems stupid, to me he has either reincarnated and he is a baby somewhere or he merged with "Consciousness" and that's the end of it. I don't really know what to make of my lack of compassion?

I found Spira helpful but I found his teacher, Francis Lucille, far more helpful. I also found Ramaji's book "1000" helpful but it's hard to relate because I seem to have different experiences to the majority of people, Ramaji included. There's also this guy http://the-wanderling.com/zen30.html

You cannot know something without knowing it's opposite.

Always seemed silly calling it Self when we identify as "I" and therefore "Selfs" / "Selves". Like, to completely new people...how confusing is that?

I don't do nofap as I found the benefits don't outweight the negatives FOR ME but I do avoid porn and only watch it on Sunday, and only once. Used to have a problem where I could not fap without porn, that's when you know there's a problem. And fapping like 8x a day to porn... You gotta think where the energy goes too. For example to power a sigil you orgasm and think of the sigil, then you burn it etc and "it does the work". Thinking on that train of thought, if that happens to a sigil, what does the energy do to your favorite pornstar you are thinking of when you orgasm? You are giving your life force energy to some random person...

I have experimented with NoFap a few times. What I found is Benefits: women seem magnetized to you. Drawbacks: too much testosterone, too much energy, even with grounding techniques, boredom, unable to watch tv etc due to overly sexualised feminist propaganda.

Hypergamy is real. Why do you think famous people get groupies? Can you get attractive women? I don't. But studies have shown 80% of women on dating sites are only attracted to the top 5% of men. And there are around 6x as many men per women on dating sites. The funny thing is the attitudes women have on sites like Seeking where there are 10x as many women per men, and the women are only there for hypergamy (money / power), yet they still think they have all their power and their vapid profiles are full of their demands

I agree about video length. Leo is one of those people who takes 10 minutes to say one sentence, unfortunatly.

Do you? Do you know you have 7 bodies? Physical is just one of them.