I had a bit of ketamine, which is pretty darn good at making things feel like a dream. Still feeling it as I type this.
I think it happened for a second, I felt for a moment that everything is just a dream happening for the sake of it. That nothingness created a dream that is seen through Sam.
Is ketamine making me full of shit or is this really it? Nothingness just dreaming because it can? I am typing this as Sam, just want to know if I'm not falling into a solipsism trap or anything. How can Sam know if he is really making progress on the path when 'his' experience is the only thing that is known? This experience among many others that have been known, when conceptualized by my mind seem very identical to other awakening experiences I read or listen to on the internet. But how could I possibly know that it is truth? If experience is the only thing that is true, how can an experience that feels 'non-dual' be any more truthful than the experience of being fully immersed in Sam? Can truth of experience be verified?
I feel as if my self-realization is regressing just by conceptualizing my experience into word and sharing it with you all, but I can't find any other way to verify that my self-realization is progressing. Is this just one of the paradoxes that are supposed to be encountered on the path? Am I thinking about this too much?
Love you all, thank you.
I had a bit of ketamine, which is pretty darn good at making things feel like a dream. Still feeling it as I type this. I think it happened for a second, I felt for a moment that everything is just a dream happening for the sake of it. That nothingness created a dream that is seen through Sam. Is ketamine making me full of shit or is this really it? Nothingness just dreaming because it can? I am typing this as Sam, just want to know if I'm not falling into a solipsism trap or anything. How can Sam know if he is really making progress on the path when 'his' experience is the only thing that is known? This experience among many others that have been known, when conceptualized by my mind seem very identical to other awakening experiences I read or listen to on the internet. But how could I possibly know that it is truth? If experience is the only thing that is true, how can an experience that feels 'non-dual' be any more truthful than the experience of being fully immersed in Sam? Can truth of experience be verified? I feel as if my self-realization is regressing just by conceptualizing my experience into word and sharing it with you all, but I can't find any other way to verify that my self-realization is progressing. Is this just one of the paradoxes that are supposed to be encountered on the path? Am I thinking about this too much? Love you all, thank you.