Arman

Yeah these things occur. Sometimes also I have noticed during my growth, especially during phases where there is long integration or release of fairly 'deep seated' stuff, there can be periods where emotional connection and the energy to be social dissipate. Kind of like I've just felt severed from people or something. Not in a particularly depressing or negative way, just that I noticed that the heart felt feeling and sense of connection had dimmed. Also periods where I felt like I'd have to abandon all my social connections because I felt as though they were holding me back and that I'd need to start anew. Then the pendulum swings the other way, and I feel like maybe as a result of an energetic shift or something, suddenly I naturally gravitate towards my old friends again and have a great time. Really revitalizing and with newfound appreciation. Then also, some people I decide I just don't want to connect with because I don't want to get into bad habits or as you said, be drawn back into my old self. So there's some of that, too. So I think you really needn't worry. You haven't stopped resonating with people because you've outgrown them. Growing and integration doesn't negate the old, it encompasses it. You'll only be able to resonate with greater compassion in time. Worry not. You'll meet lots of cool new people who you'll appreciate and who will greatly appreciate you.

Yeah, like aurum said, at least you recognize the problem. Most guys don't realize their neediness is even repelling women. At worst they think it's a good thing and just get super bitter when the girls get repulsed. No, at least the way you're expressing it, having something 'better to do' sounds more like covering up a root issue. However not focusing on it so heavily is probably a good idea. You're going in the right direction. Life and its tragedies (like you not doing so well with her) are exposing your blind spots and burning them out of you. That's what girls do. The pain is good and you're understanding its root. Keep taking action as you're doing (and ur doing good son) and allowing your blocks and dysfunctional behaviors to come to the surface of your awareness. As long as you're aware, then they will start to untangle. In order to greatly accelerate this however, use a practice like Callums recommended Sedona method, or Vipassana, shadow work, letting go, or whatever resonates with you to allow the visceral roots of the behavior to integrate. Tip: the emotions that arise, the negative feelings, that's where the money is cos that's the way it is. integration of what holds us back is a long and exhausting process, but it's worth it

LOL damn dude what an absolute pimp. You're overthinking it. Totally normal. What is there to transcend?? Embrace your sexuality dude. If you want to have multiple relationships then just figure out how to do it. It's not impossible, and can be sustainable and you can even seriously grow as a result of it.

My friend has a two year old son who often kind of babbles or speaks gibberish. Upon observing him, it feels clear at least to me that he is communicating, but more in a feeling or energetic way than by connecting words to thought forms. More an imitation of expressions or feeling ideas that exert themselves through sound. A bit like the same way we'd act if we were to comically imitate another language by making sounds and moving our hands, but not necessarily having any particular idea in mind. This is the more natural communication, before we are stifled by words. Consider your need to label as just further energetic phenomena. Your insistence that it is limiting reality could potentially be a denial or reality, because what are your labels if not spontaneous manifestations of the moment? If you want to further surrender, stop looking as thought forms or labels as any different to birds you might see, or a colour or sound.

Posture effects the way energy moves in the body, and so it has impact on awareness and consciousness. Cross legged is a good way to sit, and if you are comfortable with it, do it that way. If you can increase flexibility and have OK knees, once you get more comfortable, try looking up videos on how to sit in half-lotus as an experiment in how a not too intense change can effect your meditation. It's a good idea to look up some basic videos on getting into even the most basic postures, especially when it comes to sitting, because we can unknowingly be putting pressure on our joints which can have accumulative negative effects over time. That being said, what is probably much more important than how you sit, is the sustainability of your practice. Therefore if you're unable to sit cross legged, then sitting on a chair, or sitting, lying, or being in ANY position is fine, and not something you need to give too much thought to. Either way I also suggest back support. As for 60m for 30m, I guess it comes down to your goals. If you're aiming for overall well-being I'd go for 30m twice a day since its effects are kind of spread throughout the day and allows two points for integrating and releasing pressure.

im north of the river

Nice bro, thank you for sharing.

hot dang you got an interesting writing style don't be dismayed by not getting what you're asking here. anyone with true self awareness and love isn't going to give you what you're asking, because they wouldn't dare rob you of your own power and reinforce the beliefs that are hurting you what are you trying to do, exactly? your aim and frame are driving you bonkers. forget the time limits, forget where you think you're supposed to be vs where you are first decide where you are is not so bad - practice gratitude then get excited about the fact that you are on this path at all - that's some serious grace. then you know that you're always improving. whatever practices you're doing, whatever map you're following or however confused you are, you know you are on the path and life is guiding you towards where you're supposed to be. you say, where I am is great, but I'm going to see just how awesome things can get. there will be some down periods but those help you even more than the good times don't compare yourself to some transcendental object, or some ideal. it's illusory dude, you're fine. with all your dysfunction and neurosis you're just fine. tend to your own heart more so you know you're actually very safe where you are. knowing that you are perfectly on the path and only being led to the greatest version of yourself: only one task remains, and that is to relax and tend to how you feel in the moment. to bring ease, relaxation and gratitude to your body. this will help to unwind your overstimulated energetic system/nervous system which is coming through in your post. ps. the 'I love you's to yourself are a good practice. the crazier your husband thinks you are, the better you're doing... probably.

read the book instead, socrates is way more badass on text. it's supposed to be a true story, too

if you say so

My perspective: Confusion and inability to make decisions come from emotional blockages. Emotional blockages come from a lack of willingness to be present with discomfort/resistance. Bare with me here: Knowing the right choice comes from intuition. Intuition is the clear still inner voice that leads us down the path of greatest expansion. Growth means having to face resistance. Paradoxically intuition always leads to the path of least resistance, but for as long as we're in the physical domain, the path of least resistance means having to face some resistance now for greatest optimization. Resistance is uncomfortable, and if you're not willing to be uncomfortable then you will never dissolve the resistance that life is asking you to move through in order to grow. Confusion is not as you think it is. It is not a lack of answers. It is merely an energetic/physiological phenomena. Confusion is just like fear, anger, grief, etc. We think of it as having special connection to the mind, intellect, etc, but it's not the case. It can be useful to rid yourself of the label of confusion. Instead, you may wish to call it resistance. Emotional blockages narrow our vision. No discomfort or resistance can be resolved with an answer - only awareness and willingness to be present with discomfort resolves it. Therefore, it is impossible to be able to discover 'answers' at the level of intellect or thought that resolve discomfort. At best, these answers only sedate the discomfort which you've labelled as confusion, but the resistance will soon return and with it your answer won't make sense anymore or you are unsure of it. When the resistance is let go of, the answer comes clearly and obviously. Often in fact, we will feel so silly for not having seen it in the first place. It seems obvious obvious obvious. 'Answers' come when the resistance has been dissolved at the being level. When people let go of their resistance, or let go of attachment, an answer comes, but the mistake they make is to assume that the answer caused the feeling of resolution and the sensation of progress. The truth is, the answer was the spontaneous emanation that arose from the shift that occurred at the more subtle being level, as a result of having dissolved resistance. You were now vibrationally compatible with ideas and energies that you were previously blind to. The shift itself is what makes you feel good and allows you to move out of the illusion of stagnation. Not the answer that was born out of it. ---- So this means when you are unsure of what to do on a subject, your aim should be to acknowledge the discomfort and resistance on the subject, and then aim to 'let it go'. We let go by accepting the experience and allowing it to be there unconditionally. You accept that it's where you are and how you feel. It is useful to accept the situation and the various ways it can turn out. On larger, 'heavier' subjects, it can take time or multiple sessions of continuing to let go and allow resistance before clarity can come in - but that's not always the case. Sometimes letting go can bring instantaneous, often miraculous results. It would be very useful for you to practically play with this idea (and I encourage you discover the truth of it for yourself) by using it on less contentious subjects. For example, you can't decide between two meals to eat. Or you don't know which movie to watch, what clothes you want to wear, who you want to hang out with today, etc. When you feel unsure on the subject and its causing you discomfort, apply the practice of unconditionally allowing the discomfort and resistance to be there. Accepting it, and the various outcomes. Accept that you may even choose the 'wrong' thing but that you'd still be okay with it. Then observe the results. You will know clarity when it comes, because it is joyous, expansive, relieving and comes with a sense of vitality. As you keep repeating this process with various difficulties in your life, you'll gain an increased sense of self-esteem and understanding. Leo's video on the subject is EXCELLENT.

+1 for Anandamayi Ma

I think people definitely have different temperaments. Some people prefer to be alone to be creative or read, introspect or whatever more often than being out. That being said, I think the vast majority of people use introversion as an excuse for the inability to connect and cope with social experiences and relationships. Or the inability to express themselves properly. They end up mistaking social conditioning and emotional blocks as their temperament, which is kind of excused by this introvert/extrovert paradigm. 'It's just who I am.' Even introverts have the innate ability and perhaps even birthright to feel good, expansive and connect deeply in all circumstances. I bet there are lots of people who would be alarmed at how extroverted their behavior and lifestyle would be if they shed fears. A healthy introvert may choose to sit alone instead of being with others, but is fully comfortable with either situation.

Lol definitely inspired by Leo the lion himself. Endearing, I think. Might cause some slight controversy, but any publicity is good publicity right?

I was being facetious to poke fun at the people and websites that have lots of spurious claims on the subject. Though I suppose stranger things occur...

Bro it's not one or the other. Do you understand there has been no greater time in the history of humanity to do what YOU want and also have it be very lucrative? Don't want to work the 9-5? Then decide that's not how you'll be living your life and figure it out dude. Your blockage here isn't a practical one, it's an emotional one. Your emotions and your root beliefs about money and how it's made are literally blinding you. One day when you release those you will think this was the silliest question. Find out what you love and figure out a way to make to make money off of it. The source of your income doesn't necessarily need to be based off your primary passion either. Gain some skills like marketing, get a basic understanding of the entrepreneurial mindset and landscape. This stuff is really exciting. You may have to work a 9-5 in the short term to gain basic equity if necessary or just to get you rolling - but is that really so bad? Is it so bad to actually experience something less than your ideal on your journey forward? Use it as an opportunity to sink in new things and appreciate the contrast and inspiration you can allow it to create before you move onto the next bigger steps. Also working a 9-5 can be nice because if your goal is self actualization and self development then you can serve as an inspiration and just general beacon of positivity that some people and work places desperately need. Is it so bad to be of service to others? If you are unhappy doing what you are doing now, you will be unhappy with the money and extra time on your hands. No way around that. You have unlimited abundance of content in your experience to allow you to grow, but you are telling yourself it isn't available until X Y and Z are in place. The landscape and potential are endless. Change your mindset, change your frames.

Honestly bro I live in Australia. Very different to New York! Even in winter here it's really not too bad so I can't compare. In summer it is even enjoyable if you can imagine that, lol. I do wish I could live in a cold country because cold showers bring a different level of intensity. Awesome man, thank you.

My suggestion is that these thoughts have roots in emotional imprints. Attempting to manipulate and reason at the thought level is like trying to kill a tree by snipping away at a few of its leaves. They'll just grow again, and in fact it may even promote growth. When the thoughts arise, instead of noting the thought, note the emotional signature that comes with it. This is the culprit, and it is far more effective to work through the emotional charge (the trunk or roots of the tree) than it is the mind and intellect. When the emotional charges are allowed to integrate and release, with them, the thoughts too disappear. Understand that catastrophe is not out there, rather there is an experience of emotional catastrophe within that is attempting to keep you safe by creating an endless stream of thought forms. Your job is to recognize that it is misguided, acknowledge it for its innocence and allow the emotions to be there unconditionally. This unravels them, integrates and dissolves. The reason Eckhart Tolle describes beautiful experiences, but you are experiencing such 'horrible things' (which by the way, are the grace that allows you to grow) is because he has dissolved much of the internal blocks and emotional charges, which allows for a deepening of experience. It is ok to be where you are, and know that the experience only gets deeper and more radiant as time goes on. As you keep meditating, being aware in day to day experiences and allowing emotional imprints to unravel as they arise, experience gets easier and negative thoughts occur less and less, and eventually, not at all.

How long ago was your last acid trip that you described? I've had a similar experience on acid years ago. This was when I was first introduced to concepts of chakras and energy systems and I didn't really know what to think about them, so I was sitting in the park high and just for fun decided if I could 'raise energy up my body' as a goof to see if anything would happen. An intense rumbling energy started from my lower body and raised upwards like it was vibrating intensely. It went up through the crown of my head and dispersed. I was left feeling incredibly vital. A minute or two later I would sit to meditate and it was just waves of the highest bliss I'd ever remembered feeling at the time. That experience turned me on to yoga and pranayama practices. Experiences like these are exciting but no good comes from becoming attached to them. They also take months and years to integrate and balance from, even if it doesn't feel like a lot is happening. Judging from the intensity of your experience, I would take care in your lifestyle, practices and psychedelic experiences. Take great heed. Allow the energy to subtly do its thing over time. Sometimes these intense experience come for a few moments or an hour or two or a day and then go away. If you keep pushing the river, however, sometimes you may trigger an experience of that intensity that can last days, weeks, months or longer. It can be harrowing. Lackadaisical attitude towards this kind of stuff can occasionally afford you reprimand from the universe. My advice is trip less, meditate more, and avoid practices that focus heavily on moving energy or focusing on energy centers.

Also as a general note, I've noticed when statements like "how do I deal with lower vibrational people, they bring me down" are made, it usually implies that we're nowhere near as 'high' relative to the people we're judging as we think we are. When our "vibration" rises, it doesn't necessarily mean that relating to and enjoying relative "lower vibrational people" is more difficult. In fact the opposite should be the case because you should understand the place they're coming from better than they do, assuming you have passed through similar stages with basic mastery, as is implied. Compassion and ease should be the natural response. When it's a frustrating experience, then it's probably a sign to drop judgements and keep working on yourself.

I have gone through periods of taking cold showers. Ask anyone who is enthusiastic about cold showers; they will tell you it gives you confidence, vitality, better skin, increase libido, improve your immune system, detoxify the body, increase testosterone, reverse the balding process, make your balls bigger, it'll cure cancer, make you taller, straighten your teeth and even do your taxes for you. Now I've seen very little evidence supporting any of the more common claims. I've made a few lazy attempts at finding research but didn't find anything good. I bet there's probably more interesting studies and evidence now that Wim Hof is on the scene trying to legitimize his work. Though less about cold showers and more about impact of cold treatment and breathing. (Check him out if you're not aware. His first joe rogan podcast is excellent) but nothing that I've been exposed to... My personal experience has been that they make me feel really good. They are indeed very revitalizing and I really liked the effects it had on my skin and hair. They are a nice exercise for facing something uncomfortable each day. Part of the reason I like it is that it's never 100% easy to do. Especially after taking a break, you get butterflies in your stomach before you do it and your mind and body kick in and convince you not to do it, but ideally you choose to do it anyway. i believe this to be a powerful psychological exercise because I have never gotten out of a cold shower having regret it. It makes me feel awake and empowered in a way that other practices don't. So when you are in an experience that can help you grow but you know will be uncomfortable; you also know that you have been here before and you know how it goes... that your mind will try to trick you but if you power through it you will receive the gains. edit: oops, just realized the question was for leo. well there's my 2 cents

It is not wrong to stick to ones personal values. Though it sounds to me like this is less about sticking to your values and more about using smaller arbitrary things as an excuse not to face something that is going to be uncomfortable. I think you know which option is the high road to take but you're hoping we excuse the other. To be blunt about the cigarette smoke: Big deal unless you're asthmatic or something, and even then you could probably make it work. Is it more important than being there for your mum? From what you've said on paper, yeah I think it's better to be with her in this time. I certainly don't expect you to sleep in his bed... No doubt it will probably be strenuous, but if you want to know if it is the more courageous and loving option; you know the answer is yes. That being said, that's all easy for me to say, as I'm not in your position nor do I know the grief you're going through. I fail to make courageous choices all the time. Life goes on, I guess. If you don't stay with her then at least forgive yourself and be OK with doing that. Let her know it's hard for you and be with her when it is tolerable to do so. Wishing you strength and love.

Yeah it's rough. The highs get higher and the lows get lower. Fortunately your baseline increases with it and life only throws as much as you can handle. Though by design it often feels like more than we can handle, lol.

You might think a bit differently if you watched Leo wake up in the morning and take a shit.

I think you'll discover them automatically as you start to get rid of fear and the social conditioning that expects you to do X Y and Z. Just start to pay attention to what excites you and follow those pursuits. Even if you don't know how you can capitalize on them and make them a life goal or a vocation, just explore things that are interesting to you. This requires the ability to feel inside for subtle feelings and the inner voice. That's a natural byproduct of meditation, so keep meditating. If you think nothing excites or interests you, then lower your bar of what exciting means and explore whatever feels best. Sometimes what feels best may only seem like a 1% improvement from sitting on the couch staring at a wall. That's ok, follow and take action on the thing that feels 1% better. That might be reading a book, learning about a new skill, watching a TV show that feels inspiring, drawing, talking to someone, whatever. Over time, doing this increases the momentum and you make larger exciting leaps of self discovery. In my experience, over time these things grow and become more clear as you take little steps. You don't have to know immediately what you want to pursue. It is enough to know that you want to know. That's more than a lot of people, and setting your intention strongly on that exploration will have good effects on the outcome. Oh yeah, and Leo kind of has an entire course dedicated to this subject. ;)