bejapuskas

@electroBeam I cannot understand whether you are being serious or no lol

But I've also had my foot broken for the last week and I don't mind needing help all the time. I mean, acknowledging the fact that I am not able to do everything by myself, older people letting me sit instead of them in the bus, someone having to hold the door for me etc... And it genuinely feels good to be kind of vulnerable and protected in this way and it is a new feeling for me.

I've noticed that I get really excited about ideas I know nothing about and I get frightened and skeptical about ideas that are similar to the opinion of the majority of people I know. I don't know how to make sense of this. I am really attracted by the unknown, it's like a magnet. As Leo said in his last video, going through unimaginable experiences. What I often do is talk to extraordinary people and analyze their experiences very attentively, it's as if I am living their lives, it's just so fascinating. I am still very open to the opinions here but it is sometimes very emotionally challenging. Anyone else experiencing this?

@Elisabeth Hey 160 km away from Mumbai... I don't know what that means other than chaos. I know quite a few Indians and they seem „alright“ to me, I never felt like they were too closed off to me or anything, they actually motivated me to go visit their country, although they all live more closer to the Himalayas and Nepal in the north. I don't know anyone who knows the Asian schools unfortunately... I am doing some more research now.

@28 cm unbuffed Hey! Thank you for this. It's not so hard for me to ignore others, as I know that the same people who give me career advice are burned out at the same time. Also the people who advice me not to go study abroad so early in life have never studied there themselves, while everyone who has is highly supportive. But also I know that I am „a young European lad“ and might still be a bit naive about the world, I mean, I am pretty sure I am hahahaha. For example, I thought I would put Singapore as my #1 priority and it would probably even be easier to get there, as half of the people want to go to study in India, but I am just scared that it would end the same way as my experience with learning Japanese. (I fucking hate formalities, although not all Japanese are like that and I still love them as people) The thing is, the „dumb“ decisions later turn out to be the most intelligent ones, as I get the most wisdom out of them, but also I don't know when to stop being dumb I think I still don't know whether you have to live through something *yourself* in order to understand it. Listening to others advice, be it good or bad, it just doesn't work for me. I also hope that my family won't be so angry/sad, as it might seem as if I didn't care about them sometimes, when I talk about going to the other side of the world. Life is hilarious, period.

@Average Investor Thank you buddy It is just so weird you know, I don't know if I can imagine what it means for me (I can't)

@Dumuzzi Thanks for answering! I have still 2 years left to graduating high school. The Czech diploma isn't as bad, but it is much harder than for example SAT. If I graduate from that school, I would get an IB (international baccelaureate) which can even get you a scholarship at the top schools if you get high enough score. I am not so worried about getting to a top school, I value other things more Then I can go to a university. Definitely the Singaporean diploma is the most powerful in this way, but I think all the schools are very valuable, I heard that schools are looking for students in the UWC schools and are actively offering them scholarships even in the less developed countries. The thing is, I have some negative experiences with Japanese people and I am concerned that other east Asian countries have a similar mentality (strict, cold, competetive), although I am not sure if that would make a significant impact on the teacher's behavior, as the school is international. I am just worried, since the school in Singapore is showing off with their IB scores so I have this feeling that it will be too tough there. It's not necessarily negative, but as I said, I value other things as well. I am interested in your experience with living there, what do you think are some of the things I am not considering?

Ok I get you. Get it out of your mind somehow, work on yourself, contemplate the situation from all the other people's perspective so that you get a more holistic understanding of the situation, be radically honest, that's axiomatic. Then you can try to find another friend group, maybe outside school and get an immediate feedback on your growth, if they naturally flow towards you and you have a good feeling about it, then you can try to see if you can maybe rebuild those old relationships if you think they are worth it. Look at people who you have left in your life, what do they have in common (with you)? Hope this helps, it might take months though

What does it mean that they leave you? It sounds like science fiction when you don't give any details...

wow this thread increased my awareness, thank you beautiful

@Consilience Wow that's such an amazing description!!! Actually, when I am sitting with a friend in a teashop and we are having a focused conversation, time goes by so slowly... It works!!

@Mircan Look out for looking out I mean, that's the thing you wanna get rid off right, you want to be certain. Sometimes Love is closer than you think hahahahahaha

Ego *seems* to exist when the Self destroys Itself into the ego and the other than the ego, it only exists together with Self-destruction, Self-fragmentation, it is that and it pushes you to Self-realization, because it is a lie that stinks, just as any other lie does. It does not push others away - it creates others. In fact, all existences that are not seen as the Absolute Existence only exist in the illusion of destruction in the mind. And it is not like it ruins your life, because it is that life, that is limited and shall end. Without this duality you live as Infinite Love-Reality forever, no question/doubt about that. In Awareness, there is no-one who could verify, agree or disprove this. Also there is no such thing as the opposite of Love, since it exists by itself independently. Dark is not the opposite of light, it is just the absence or unawareness of light. There is no such thing as the opposite of light. God is always there to include you <3 How is your meditation practice?

@Consilience You are Beautiful! <3 Thank you for this. What does patience mean for you in your life experience?

The honey is harvested from rhododendron flowers in spring and it is said that 3 teaspoons is a high enough dose in order to have some trippy effects. Nature is amazing. https://www.mnn.com/earth-matters/wilderness-resources/stories/worlds-largest-honey-bee-makes-hallucinogenic-honey-you-have-be-crazy-harvest?fbclid=IwAR3v9donSzlnEHwzhgjNNJuORfrsIBdpFa_B93zDnFwHFoB1JRbonu_MNtM

@pluto Do you mean that a balanced person is in the middle or can it be something like hyper-masculine, super-straight, hopelessly romantic hypersexual monogamous vanilla type of person?

@Consept Yeh definitely understanding is great! I just never thought that people feel relief when they first start finding out new things about their sexuality, I thought it is mostly shocking or at least like a weird territory kinda feeling. It seemed kinda natural and true to think this, because these kinds of people have much higher suicide rates than heterosexuals, in which I cannot find a relationship with relief, but it might be more complex than that. I might ask more people about this...

@Consept I actually think it can be a very sudden change, without ever being interested in it. that's just my experience though. Also the oreintation can change throughout your life, even multiple times... I just think the categories are very fluid and not so strictly given... Also I don't think it's easy to accept that you're gay, come on, if you started having these thoughts, it would at least be weird as hell.

@Consept Wow, ok, so where do you think is the boundary between straight x hocd x gayness, is there a set boundary, or like a useful one that you could use for this? @Buba Are you still attracted to girls or did that fade away? I am not sure from what you're saying...

@Consept What made you think that? I am just curious.

@Consept Have you even gone through this yourself?

@Leo Gura @Hansu My wording was pretty bad, sorry for that. In my experience, people, who aren't the usual heterosexual, aren't comfortable (don't feel like) talking about their fantasies with people who are clearly not accepting them. But it didn't come to my mind that there might be people who seem nice on the surface but will demonize you after you tell them... @Buba Do you have any friends who have similar urges or are open to you about their accepting?

If your bros are really your bros, they wont leave you because of this, you can talk about it with them if you feel like it in my opinion

@Scholar amazing

@d0ornokey Oh yeah I dont know how that works, he is still pretty funny, he has a cool Indian accent, who wouldnt resonate with that kind of guy