Identity

I've read the way of the superior man and watched some video's from David Deida. John Wineland I hadn't heard about. Just watched the first video of him, like his energy. Thanks for sharing, will look at some more videos

Oh, great question. Funnily enough, that is something I haven't explored a lot of yet. Fears that I am definitely aware of are linked to my sexual performance and its consequences. It's kind of a web of beliefs and thoughts that, a perspective I took from pick-up, that is causing that. It goes something like: I need to be 'good' at sex and satisfy the girl --> If I don't, she will be unsatisfied --> She will look for it elsewhere and cheat. On top of that, there is also a fear about what that would say about me. That fear might actually be bigger, to become 'the guy who could not satisfy his girlfriend and therefore she cheated on him'. However, this fear is not at the core. This is something that is built on top I think, not the foundation. The foundation I would have to explore more.. a great question to journal about, thank you! It shows up for me as a disconnection. A feeling of the energy being blocked, not open. It also has to do with a feeling of not being good enough and a fear of how other people see me. More exploration of the fear, noted.

Things I have tried so far to heal: - A few psychedelic trips over the past years - Quitting porn, haven't watched close to a year - Conversations, trials and tribulations with my girlfriend - Mindfulness, awareness, meditation - Some theory, mostly through video's (not extensive) - Some journaling here and there - We just had our first therapy session on this topic last week Area's that seem interesting: - Deeper theory through books, teachers, retreats - Implementing structural practices (kegel exercises?) - More mindful masturbation - Healing the relationship with my mother (trauma at least partially came through my relationship with her, have not explored/healed deeply yet). - Continue therapy

I'm 50 trips deep hahaha. A few have been around this topic, but most haven't. Maybe more could help, but I am at a place now where I am not compelled to take them. Feel like I need more grounding and integration before coming back to them.

Hmm, I am in touch with it to some degree and it changes depending on my state. These states can vary a lot. There have been experiences where I felt confident, powerful, sexually alive. However, these states are quite rare. It is more common for me to have anxiety. Also, my connection to my sexuality is fragile. I could be in a good mood, feeling confident, feeling my turn-on. And just a subtle comment of denial from my girlfriend can cause this to block. In those moments I literally feel the blockage in my stomach area. There probably is some form of shame somewhere there, but honestly, I am mostly aware of fear.

The first idea was to write a long post about it but figured to not get lost in too much story. But yes, I have experience with sexuality. Five-ish years ago I got involved in pick-up, had a bunch of one-night stands and stuff. Now I've been in a relationship for the past two years. Even though there have been a bunch of experiences and some healing, I still just feel this disconnection from my sexuality. My assumption is that the fear stems from a denial/rejection of my sexuality during childhood (or maybe also past lives/family lineage). All the other stuff that happened were built on that rotten foundation. How can I go back to fix that foundation?

If you are looking for some conscious entertainment, check out Harry Mack. The topics he rhymes about are often quite interesting and his skills are off the charts. Spiral dynamics assessment: orange/GREEN, his shirt proves it ?

Cool! - BuddhaAtTheGasPump - Living 4D with Paul Check - Joe Rogan obviously ?

What I rarely hear people talking about that the capitalistic system actually puts people in a predicament that leads to a very low efficiency. For a human being in this system to actually provide value to society, is made unnecessary hard. The total amount of energy someone at work actually spends on creating value is relatively low. What do I mean by this? Imagine an entrepreneur in this current system. What percentage of the time is focussed on actually improving the lives of clients? So much time is spend holding up masks, meeting selfish needs, creating appearances, playing games. Some things in the category: - Marketing - A large part of finances - Social media - Large parts of communication - A large part of sales - And the list could go on, also in many subtle ways that are hard to describe. If we go even deeper: what are the thoughts of the entrepreneur on an average day? Very little time is spent thinking about serving others. And can we blame the individual? It is quite a challenge to meet your needs and survive. Being creative is a luxury many can't afford. There are all these forces put on the individuals that make them occupied with meeting those low-consciousness needs. Of course in the end the average level of consciousness is in the end creating this whole system... but still. For example, I work at a company that provides trainings to corporate to leaders from corporate organisations. We are expanding on a project that is called "Next Generation Leadership". The intention is to help the leaders of tomorrow to put themselves in the position where they can become conscious creators. I just came out of a team meeting where we were discussing the main pillars for expanding on the existing product. Three main subjects came about: - External relations/sales. Figuring out ways to get in contact with the right people so we can gather clients. - Branding. Things on the website, good-looking sign-up forms, etc. - Community: Making sure that people stay in contact after the programme. Yes, also to provide some value to them, but a big undertone is sales related. In the end, I managed to squeeze in a fourth pillar: content creation. Improving the actual quality and impact of the programme. It is simply relatively low on the list. This is quite ironic because the values underlying capitalism are very focussed around providing value. At least that is the story that is told. But if we would trust each other more, cooperate better, throw in some genuine care as well. There could be systems that are way more efficient. Even if merely pursuing the very values capitalism tries to fulfil. But surely to whilst trying to create the biggest beauty on this earth as we can. Hmm what stage of development would this analysis be... green/yellow?

Am I tripping, or is it actually visible when people have opened their third eye? I’ve noticed with a bunch of people. Look at this selfie for example

@Tim R All right, there is probably more that we agree on than disagree. Think it’s time to let this hypothesis go. Enjoy your evening ??

@seeking_brilliance Hahaha ? Not sure if that is a roast or not, but funny either way.

@Tim R Hmm, don’t think I agree with that. There seem to be clear linkages between energetic systems and physical systems. Think about psychosomatic illnesses and all that type of stuff. Think about how one’s posture changed as they open up chakras. Maybe this whole third eye thing is bs, but I would pose that there are linkages between different levels of being, from energetic to physical. Together forming one interconnected system.

@AdamR95 Agreed, that’s the most important part. Yet consciously shaping these kinds of structures can help to make that easier as well I think. It’s kind of a chicken or egg problem; unconscious system creates unconscious individuals, unconscious individuals create unconscious systems. If we tackle the problem on both sides, we can inch our way up quicker.

@seeking_brilliance Could not keep a straight face trying to take this selfie ??? With this lighting it’s not visible..

@Tim R You are telling me that there is nothing going on here on Leo’s forehead? ?

@artcastle Thanks, Ill take a look at it over the weekend ??

@datamonster Agreed, let’s create a better system together! ?

Funny story. a couple years back I had a book club with some friends. One by one we could choose a personal development book. When it was my turn, I choose the spiral dynamics book. We didn’t make it more than a couple chapters in before the book club fell apart. ???

Thought this comedy sketch about stage blue was pretty hilarious:

@Nahm All kind of "stiff" like this? I like what you did there.

The concept of personal development gets thrown around a lot. Different people attach completely different meanings to this concept. This interesting phrase just came to me that I wanted to share: "Real personal development is changing what you see as personal development." To unpack this a bit further, when we are pursuing a certain interpretation of personal development, we are creating superficial changes. Ultimately, we still operate from the same paradigm, cognitive structure, worldview. It's just that we are pursuing a life that is more in line with what that worldview sees as beneficial. When we change our definition of personal development, that is when we really start to see ourselves and the world in a different way. New doors start to open from which we were previously unaware that they even existed. We could see it as two directions, horizontal and verticle. That's how the spiral dynamics model describes it if I remember correctly. In the end, both are important. However, it is rare to find someone who understands this meta-level of personal development. What is your definition of personal development currently?

@Rilles Loved part 1 too! Relatable stuff @Recursoinominado I'll keep the abundance mindset in mind next time some of these thoughts appear, thanks! @Leo Gura High value and rising, hehe.

Just had an interesting reflection I want to share. a few years back I did a bunch of pick-up. To be effective at fulfilling my desires, I “downloaded” a bunch of cognitive structures; beliefs, thought patterns, world views. The views helped me at the time to get what I wanted. However, they were low-conscious, partial, selfish. Like a devil I trumped around wrecking havoc on my environment. Not acting in the interest of the people around me. Now, those structures are still active in my mind. However, I have a girlfriend. Now those same structures are causing fearful thoughts and feelings. Because I have been a devil, I see devils. The world is colored by that perspective. It just turned out the lens is quite dark.

Good stuff ??