Aaron p

Did you by chance experience extreme striking fear and existential terror during this little awakening? I kind of think moksha is hitting the nail on the head here. What you're describing does not sound like awakening. While I don't think I've ever had a deep awakening of my own yet I have witnessed the impossible more times than I can count and am very acquainted with going into other dimensions. My intuition would tell me that awakening can be expected to induce unimaginable fear followed by unimaginable freedom/bliss/ecstasy. There could be other contributory factors to your emotional decline. Although I will say this, that if you have been doing spiritual work for two years it's very natural to notice parts of yourself shading like dead limbs as you progress on the path of maturity. This can be painful. However generally speaking you want to be holistic when you try to understand the root to your suffering and avoid spiritual dogma that everything must be related to mysticism. Your emotional decline could be as a result of any number of natural things. You could have a chemical imbalance (which is typically hereditary so look at your parents and their parents) you could be existentially bored you could just be depressed. Be mindful that the mind will adopt and misconstrue spiritual concepts like solipsism. Life and awakening are infinitely good positive and blissful when fulfilled correctly

@James123 OK bro I can tell just from how you're speaking that you need to introduce much more calibration to your approach to chemicals of this level (dmt). Remember that this is a serious thing it's not small it's not minor these are very powerful drugs and the experiences they produce are extremely profound. You can't just take "two tabs" of LSD and hope for the best. First you have to test each batch of drugs you get with reagent test kits and also LSD is not measured in tabs it's measured in ug one tab could be 25 ug a different tab could be 325 ug. Fuck sake. Also I would not recommend trying to do a breakthrough dose of LSD as this will last 12 hours I mean unless you're some kind of extreme psychonaut master this is probably not a good idea. DMT is another beast entirely you also want to test each batch you get and dose very carefully using a 10 mg scoop from Amazon for DMT 50 milligrams is about the standard for a breakthrough the reason a breakthrough on DMT is probably not as dangerous as it breaks through on LSD is because if you have a very challenging experience you'll be back within 15 or 20 minutes however be aware of the power of this compound you will leave the earth and unless you have a really good track record of tripping hard and having minimal bad experiences there's a very real possibility that if you have a breakthrough dose of dmt you could be launched into any number of infinite hell dimensions. So start with low doses and work your way up very gradually there is no rush. Also according to my research it is basically safe to combine MDMA and nndmt and this is actually an extraordinarily good combination as it guarantees a good trip every time. I would personally not have tripped at all on DMT if I knew this combination was acceptable and safe I will definitely be trying the DMT / MDMA combination in the future the experiences this combination can produce our absolutely amazing visually stunning absolutely one of the best experiences of my entire life. If you in turned on taking MDMA also test that batch and dose carefully. You might want to have one or two experiences of MDMA before you do the combination so you can get an idea as to the correct dose for you. MDMA is also neurotoxic and addictive and is recommended to only be used once every three months which is what I recommend as well. You can actually combine MDMA and 5meodmt however this is more serious and requires additional care and lowering of both doses. There is a theoretical possibility of experiencing something called serotonin syndrome but this is very unlikely even with the 5meo / MDMA combination, there are many reports from the blue light.org harm reduction website about this combination. The only reason I mention it is because this particular combination is very interesting to me and to others because the fear of 5me-o-dmt is extreme and MDMA is reported to be insanely useful and efficient that simply removing that fear which is incredible it's like a hack but like I say you need to dose carefully. For long trips like with LSD or psilocybin you might also want to invest in some trip killers. Typical trip killers are simple benzodiazepines. You take them and they cancel the trip in a short period of time very useful in challenging experiences. Also be aware that benzodiazepines have an addictive potential and you are really want to use them scarcely.

Leo says it's meant to feel like you're going literally insane. And the Buddhist call it no mind (they have definitively lost their minds) lol. Genius and mad are also just man made categories. But let's inspect them. We've obviously seen psychedelics go wrong before. People can lose their minds in a bad way too. I think the primary difference we can make for simplified sake is that one of the most distinguishing factors is calibration. It's a person mad? Might not be as easy as simple yes or no answers.. Awakening is very mad. Super crazy. And I suppose it also could go very right or very wrong. Typically a person who is closer to the line of genius is someone who exhibits similar mental flexibility to a mad man but with more calibration orientation information intelligence calculation and intention. Once again for simplicity sake I suppose we could make a broad distinction that both categories include a degree of outlandishness but a genius will have value knowledge and wisdom where a madman will probably be more interested in discussing stupid conspiracy theories or random topics of complete pointlessness. I might add that the madman is a person I find quite entertaining

Kinda funny cuz when viewed through a logical-mystical perspective curses and gods and devils are all real. They have real power and govern aspects of reality. But I doubt they are like what most people would imagine them to be like. I think it's just vibration.

I think I'm reading this correctly in that my understanding of what he means when he says everything is right is possibly like in the sense that all of existence is correct and perfect? Even incorrectness is correct in the sense that it exists and could not exist in any other way and ultimately serves truth...?

A meaningless lump? Have you got any idea how powerful your mind is. You are literally fucking God. Bro go do 150ug LSD, watch in detail what happens. Meaningless lump is imagined by infinite genius

@Breathe nice bro

Bro haha I took 300ug one time and I just completely lost control of my bodily movements. I could just about steer my body like a large boat as it paced around and around in circles looking for something. I've never been so confused in my entire life hahaha. I thought It was my clothes getting in the way so I took them all of all while still going in circles. I have no idea what the fuck I was thinking. Lol. Eventually I put my clothes back on, gathering them piece by piece each circuit I done and went for a run. Lol things got better.

Btw man. If your actually going fully into this you miiiiight want to review Leo's cult psychology series just for good measure to completely inoculate you against accidentally starting a cult lol

Ok good beard. Ok I just subbed. I'm in.

The beard is on point.

Damn. Sorry to hear that bro. Sounds super difficult. Connect with high quality people on the forum for support. Chemo is highly effective and depending on your cancer type, you could get cured and look back on this experience in 20 years and think "this experience was the single most vital experience to my lifes fulfilment." Don't let the mind jump to extreme conclusions. My granda got cured of cancer. He didn't even use chemo. If your strong enough you could even use this experience to face certain possible eventualities head on. But this would require strength and be careful not to overestimate your own strength here. Let me just say this, what we imagine certain experiences to be are extremely inaccurate and what society has called the deepest and worst possible events...are actually not. God is your ultimate friend and ultimate protector. And man, if we're going to be honest...there really is nothing to fear. Your story has just dramatically changed, you could be an incredibly powerful force for helping others in despair. They will respect you 1000x more. You could change lives even just by posting on this forum.

Lucid dream (check out giz Edwards on YouTube), sensory deprivation float tanks, holotropic breath work. Also having an intense sexual experience can be transcendental.

Leo = actual top G

@Buck Edwards y is your profile pic a different image of an attractive girl every time I see you haha

The boss has spoken

absolute gangster. Oh boy this gets me pumped for my own first deep awakening

People from the blue light drug harm reduction site have info on mixing Molly and NN and even mixing Molly with 5meo. With the m+5 combo you need to take a lot of care as there is possible harm that can happen, but minimal if you lower both doses. But m+NN is extremely good, removes all fear. If I went back I would never have done a single NN trip without m. Although m is addictive and neurotoxic so max once every 3 months or so. Fear on NN is very difficult for most, m conveniently removes all the fear and guarantees a good trip lol, handy. Also if your trying mushies or lysergic invest in some trip killers. It's handy to have a button you can press to just end a trip if it's going in a bad direction.

Firstly his name was yeshua which is actually closer to Joshua than the westernised "Jesus." So the canonical scriptures say that Joshua was unattractive (Isaiah 53:2), that he was did self improvement (Luke 2:52), he hung out with low quality people (Luke 7:34) and seriously pissed off religious people when addressing fact that he knew he was god. I do believe that this manifestation of the absolute can serve quite nicely when the ego requires some tenderness and something it can relate to. From an all out enlightenment perspective is probably not useful but we aren't all there yet. Josh was actually quite a nice sounding guy. An interesting specimen. I think he would have fit in in this community lol. Check out what he said here: Matthew 11:28-30 “Are you tired? Worn out? Burned out on religion? Come to me. Get away with me and you’ll recover your life. I’ll show you how to take a real rest. Walk with me and work with me—watch how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. I won’t lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you. Keep company with me and you’ll learn to live freely and lightly.”

It's so fucking hilarious because the entire picture of Jesus challenging the prevalent religion at the time (Judaism) *is* the whole message. It's so unfortunate that religion can get it so so wrong. But Its also quite obvious to me that the vibration of God has maintained under currents of truth through religious developments. Like the verse "God is love". Like kinda fucking similar. There are points of overlap and interest but trying to get anywhere with religion alone is very futile. Quite dangerous actually cuz you could easily fall into a 40 year long Buddhist trap. Like that's a serious possibility. Jesus wasnt quite oppositional to religion as he did condone faith (the essence of religion) but he was very mystical too. He pissed off the religious people so much that they literally executed him. Or so the story goes. Baked into the story of Jesus I find elements of fractured truth. Lots of people say the historical likelihood of his existence is quite strong given the records and such. And religion itself is of course very central in stage blue... As such it is a major part of collective evolution. But it is extremely limited and not powerful in certain ways. But a better alternative to being a drug addict or directionless homeless person.

It's kinda funny cuz by definition, the one and only sign of enlightenment is, itself

Bro that's normal, going out into sociable places requires effort and etiquette. Also yes there's a chakra on the head of your penis.

Ultimately everything must be accepted, love, peace, beauty, wonder, fear, damage, death, torture, the stars, sunsets, Nazis, bliss, torment. From the highest possible beauty to the most depraved possible evil. Light, darkness. Purity, evil. Nothing can be rejected. Even separation is included in nonduality. If there is only one thing that has and will ever exist, it is not possible for that thing to not be anything

Murphed