inFlow

Just wanna share my experience. I quit it all. Cold turkey. Coffee, green/black tea. Never putting my hands on it again. I was experiencing anxiety for so much time that I thought it was normal to feel that. And no spiritual practice was able to help me there. But once I went off of caffeine I noticed that I'am A LOT MORE calmer by default. I no longer have anxiety and can talk to anyone in public, I'am no longer "shy" which was caused by anxiety from caffeine. I spent a week listening to youtube podcasts from doctors and simple people who talked about how they quit caffeine and what has changed and wow... I understood how bad caffeine actually is! The first two weeks were really hard. I was tired already at 11AM and didn't have any MOTIVATION to do anything. This motivation was lost because caffeine increases dopamine. And Now I'am about a month in without it and wow am I back! I have these random increases in creativity out of nowhere which was never present when I consumed caffeine. And I no longer have energy crashed, my energy levels are present all day! I don't get the high spikes though, but I will take it any time of the day. I know some people might not be affected as much in case of anxiety and other symptoms, but if you do have anxiety on a daily basis, check if it's caffeine that is giving you all of that. It raises your adrenaline levels and you are on a flight-fight ALL DAY. Now think about what that does to you! Mostly I quit it because of anxiety, I wanted to see if it affects me and YES IT DID. But there are other great benefits of quitting it.

Slowly decrease caffeine. I did it cold turkey and I would highly recommend decreasing it bit by bit until you take in zero! But if you do it cold turkey too and cut it off completely just go through the pain. You will notice that you do not have MOTIVATION to do anything. Also I understood that the "crash" is pretty much chemical, by which you deplete dopamine for that time and just crash out, it's not as if you don't have energy, you don't have dopamine to keep you going! Now my dopamine system is back to normal and I can function all day, I'am way more happier than I was on caffeine, the feeling of being ecstatic on my own is a very empowering feeling!

I recently had an awakening on how my own mind gives me way worse symptoms than food itself. Lets say I ate something that I judge as bad, later I feel bad after I consume it. But the food itself has little to no actual effect on my body and mind, but my mind has a very powerful effect that causes me to feel off. If I react to something that is happening, lets say I feel a slower digestion, the belly feels full and bloated I somewhat micro-freak out and think to myself "Yeah, that food is bad for me" and thus make the situation way worse than it actually is. I feel like I'am creating anxiety. And once I actually eat something "bad" without thinking, when I'am happy and don't judge myself for eating, I feel so great! And at first I didn't understand until I contemplated it deeper. I'am not advocating that you should eat everything, good diet is still king and has a difference on daily life. Anyone has similar experience?

@AtmanIsBrahman You had an awakening experience, thats the same as mystical experience. It's mystical because it "comes" from nowhere. You become sort of blessed with it. It's just a state of consciousness expansion, I noticed that when the day goes by you have consciousness peaks and in those peak moments you can really dig deep in contemplation. By trying to recreate that experience you can get lost in logical thinking and that's just all mind talking. You need to relax deep in it, not think about it but just observe this moment, and if you are calm and relaxed enough, Truth will unfold before you. It sort of hides from you, because you are not yet ripe enough to be there permanently. But it's possible that you can be in that state 24/7. What to make of it? I'm happy that you got your first awakening, this is just the first REAL step towards yourself. You began to walk the path. Be blessed and if you are ready, dig deeper, start practicing sadhana. Grow your consciousness more. 🙏🤍

@theleelajoker yes, letting go of everything is key. Even practices has to be let go of when you sit down for deep contemplation. Detaching is a skill that has to be strengthened. And yes it's supposed to be fun, but being attached gives you conditional "happiness", strive for that unattached, unconditional happiness. 🙏🤍

@theleelajoker I do a lot of yoga and kriya yoga and often do pranayama practices. These things that im talking about I grasped being sober. I noticed that I'm no longer interested in some things that previously I was. And it feels like it anchors the body/mind to this reality really hard. Once I noticed, I felt myself being very liquid sort of, less bound to this reality. After that I just looked around what keeps "me" locked in here and intuitively understood that one day, by the help of all these practices, you will clean yourself so much that nothing will hold you here anymore, you will not be anchored by anything and you will sort of leave this place in what is called "mahasamadhi" and the more I practice sadhana the more plausible it seems. Your belief of this reality is what keeps you on here. It feels like I still believe this dream is important and that I have shit to do, that's why it's still there. And my belief with my own direct experience is that by bypassing these beliefs or destroying them through practice is what will get me there.

It does.

If you are attached to the this dream, you hold on to it, it doesn't hold you in it. Once you FULLY no longer care about this dream you can leave it consciously.

What a wonderful quote.

Rationality and logic can lock you in really hard. Evidence based "Truth" feels super True and Real given that level of epistemology, but once you lift yourself up with consciousness it all melts away. It's not that easy to talk about these problems with other people who think this way. I just ignore them and don't waste energy trying to make them believe what I say. After some time you just understand the stage that they are in and just Love them the way they are. Just like a child who doesn't understand things yet. You just know they will eventually get it, and if not, thats OK too. Everyone is going home, but at their own pace.

I know a kid who has been to a massage doctor and the doc told the kid that his spine is very strong and everything is correct and that it's really good and I noticed that the kids ego is growing around that single interaction. I got enough awareness to notice how the ego shifts towards that, sort of cementing itself in that experience. The kid also is trying to continue this ego development unconsciously, it is trying to stay with a straight spine because it believes in it so much. It's such a fascinating thing to get to see.

It's like a mother that takes your hand and takes you to God (father) Kundalini surges through one of two nadis, Ida or Pingala, google it and see they are in a coiled form, thus it feels like a "snake" going up through the spine. It's all the same for everyone, emotional imbalance, surges of tears and laugh, random chakra vibrations etc. Just keep doing what you are doing. My suggestion would be to do a pranayama practice to build up pranic capacity. You will not contain this energy if your body/system is weak. Kundalini is very very powerful. It probably wont wake up at full force, but it's hell'a better to be prepared. I joined a group of spiritual folks that come in every few weeks, we talk and do group meditations, and I noticed that new people who come cannot stay still in our group, their body shakes and moves because they aren't strong enough to stay with that strong field of energy that we carry there. I've had similar experiences. This is just energy purging blocks out when chakras are opening up more. Don't attach yourself to these things, it just comes and goes. There is no character. Eventually you will feel way more lighter in weight and way more hollow inside, like there is more and more hollow space inside the body. The more you let go of the ego (it just lets itself go through meditation) the more "death" you will endure and eventually you will see that "ego death" is a slow process, things just die off and that's it, your ego will still be there to an extent, but it will be so little that you will no longer have resistance towards anything at life, even your partner, you will understand that everything bad that she does is only because of you and the capacity of Love towards anything will be higher and higher. You will radiate calmness and people will notice it, they might not understand it, but they will feel it. Also notice when you go back to the ego how heavy life becomes. This signals you are not going the right way. I Love your whole post. Keep at it and become the light that this world needs. Thank you ♥♥♥

@ExploringReality Thank you.. This is so beautiful. ♥

Loving this. Thank you.

You are actually doing. One of my yoga teachers once told me when you are doing an asana (pose) you must BE in the pose, not DO it. Which at the time I didn't understand and I contemplated so much time when it finally clicked. It's such a subtle difference that only a really sharp awareness can grasp.

That's all that happens.. Everyone is going home, but at their own pace.

Shhhh.... Just be. Be home. Silence that meaning maker and open up to what is.

Right here. Know what you are and you will be home all the time. If not, one keep searching. All of what you wrote is just heading you towards home.

Home

I keep being in Samadhi states. Reality has no beginning or end. It's all just one form. This state jumps in and out daily. Is there anything after that? Does it go deeper? Please, only answer who know.

@Sugarcoat You will eventually start to see the unity of things. It's quite a hard achievement considering how much practice is involved in this. One of my teachers spoke that eventually this state will be permanent.

@Sugarcoat The mind no longer makes a distinction between items, no longer does it label stuff. And the physical things that I see are just God. God in disguise.

@Hojo Thank you. Accepting everything as it is, is the theme. No longer is the mind analyzing stuff. These is just awareness of what is happening and there is a clear separation from the one who is having experiences, having emotions and the one looking at it all. I'am IT.

@Sugarcoat Everything in the vision field is unified. A item has no beginning or end. It's just all flowing in oneness. Ego melts and "I: become this unity. Mind is silent.