Christian

Sounds great. Glad I could help. I would like to make one more point: you should plan for your mind's resistance to meditation and idealt write Down all of the things that hinder you from meditating. Most people are not aware of the ways that their subconscipus mind and lower self resist change and therefore nothing happens. But you are not like the majority

Yeah, I also Think that you should ask why you are craving something. It is important to understand and to be aware of why you need the thing you want. Because from that place, you can determine whether it is worth it or there is a bigger Price that you should go for that will bring more fulfillment or maybe even go for both. For me, for instance, I get jealous when I see guys who have a girlfriend. That is because I do want one myself. However, I know that getting one will not bring me any true fulfillment and that it is a dead end. But I still feel that I need to see it experientially because that gives me first hand wisdom and make myself really realize that it is true. One thing is knowing it intellectually, another is to really know. But I do not abandon the bigger Price - my life purpose - to chase this desire. So it is a Grey area. It is not that you should always abandon the things that you want even though they do not bring true happiness/fulfillment. It depends... If it brings you wisdom, go for it nevertheless. Life is about experience...

If for example I watch a public speaker and he is great at delivering his speech and I get jealous by that, there isn't nessecarily anything wrong with that. It just shows me that he has something that I want and that is great, right? Because then, I can now take action to get what I want, see?

There are a lot of techniques you could apply. I Think the most effective one is meditation alone due to the fact that it raises your awarness. So if I were you, I would commit to meditating daily for 20 minutes. Also, it will make you more pressent and happy. Meditation is the KEY to happiness.

@popi I do not Think there is an easy solution. Fact is that people that Think like that have a belief that other People's view of you is important and or valueable and therefore, it has to reflect positivity. I also have this issue and I believe that the Real solution that males you change is raising your awareness to deeply realize that this belief will hinder you in life in different all areas of life and it will never bring true fulfillment.

@popi The fact is that some people have not found solutions to their problems and if you don't want to interact with them, you do not have to. But you make it seem like you are obligated to. That is a Lie and you know it. In reality, you can do whatever you want to do. The Universe is not Holding you back. It is a free place where everything is possible. The only thing holding you back is yourself.

@Electron Strategic planinng is nesseccary to develop a meditation practice. A good way to do that is to journal all of the different inconveniences. Then, you will be aware of them when they arise and they won't hinder you as must as a result and it will be much easier to establish it as a habit. "Awareness alone is curative".

I find that a lot of people - including myself - set these aspirations for the person that we want to become and very often fail to do so. And I believe part of the problem is that we tend to fix the behavior rather than the root cause that leads to it. This leads to maybe a change in behavior, but it does not really transform the "I" which is what I am interested in changing. I have recently red the book called "pursuing consciousness" and in this book Peter Ralston states that in order for real transformation to occur within the self, one must find the real cause to why the self is as it currently is. But how does one really become aware of the root cause of a partucular behavior? That is what I really want to know. Therefore, It would be great if u could cover this some day, Leo

Yeah, you're right. You should not forcefully try to be aware and flex those awareness muscles. That will create a lot of anxiety and frustration and it can make you RESIST meditating and reality. I have been there. Instead, meditation and being aware should come naturally without any you forcing yourself. And I know that I did not hint through what I said, but that is what meditation should be like regardless. You're right - thanks for the input

A few years ago, I had a paradigm shift with regards to school. I had for the most part disliked school and found learning very mundane. It was never really a joy of mine and I lacked passion and my grades were average. Then, at the beginning of 9th grade, I had a shift in thinking. I therefore also had an internal shift where my emotional subconscious mind became really motivated to take action to become great at school and I had 100% faith that I could do it --> Let to me taking action to find the answers. And that has now let me to be a straight A student. That means that school is no longer really an issue for me right now. I do, however, have difficulties attracting girls and I lack social skills. I want to improve in these areas, but I find it hard because every time I try to visualize myself succeeding and take action in the external world I experience an intense feeling of resistance. I would really like to transcend this feeling into one with greater benefit such as intense passion, belief and 100% certainty because it will lead me to find the answers to create abundance and a deeper understanding in these areas. Any suggestion/suggestions will be appreciated Kind Regards from Denmark

I asked Leo two questions regarding the video called "real vs fake growth". And the questions were: In order to gain real growth, do you have to change your self image? And in order to really grow, do you have to become aware of the core reasons why you do what you do? And he answered "BOTH". he fact that he said both obviously means that both disciplines leads to real growth, but how do you do both practically? You have to become aware of your own tendencies and reasons. To do this, you need awareness and you can gain that through meditation/self inquiry work. This work needs to become a habit and you should only instill one habit at a time - otherwise, you will likely fail due to lack of will power and resistance - have been there Also, it is important to change your self image. To do this, you have to have an objective in mind of who you want to become in one area of your life and visualize yourself acting and being that person in the present. DO this every day for 30 minutes straight for 60-90 days and the "new" self will be imprinted into the powerful unconscious mind of yours. Hope this helped.

Thanks, I will check it out

In that video, he talks about doing the inner work, but he does not share how to do it practically. And how to do it practically is what I want him to share in the video I've suggested. That is why I asked the question of how to become aware of the root causes and thereby transform oneself.

@Naviy If visualization does not work it might be because of resistance that occurs because of your current self image and the beliefs that are the reason why the self image is constructed the way it is. In that case, it is better to find the root cause of why your self image is the way it is. And you can do that by asking questions such as: What has led me to be afraid of public speaking? When you ask that question and then find a answer that is the root, you will experience an emotional relase. And then your fear will no longer be as active. And from that point you will start acting differently and not be as afraid anymore and all of this will happen without you having to visualize your preferred self and you won't have to fake it because the old self that was holding you back is no longer active. Because it will be trancended if you follow the process written about

I have been contemplating something and that is that when a person is ready to hear the truth of no self. I see that most people are unaware of this and that ego has full force and it would be nice to raise awareness and make these people aware, but then again, I am unsure of who is ready to hear it. I want to find the right people. I do not want to be hurt, beat up and labeled crazy and have people not doing anything with the information- my ego is being defensive - and when think about this it is really quite scary. Any suggestions for who I can tell this concept of enlightenment and no self to without it being a strategic blunder?

Enlightment is in itself a belief and I have an ourge to share it. And if I share it with others it will be a belief and the truth is that if I decide to do so, it will becone a belief system within the person I am sharing the information about enlightment with. And that is a starting point on the journey. But this starting point is not the Ultimate purpose behind why I want to share so badly. That is to make the person I am sharing this information get a direct experience of truth and as a concequence make them realize that all thoughts are a fiction and that there is no I in reality and make them destroy their models all togethers. But that will then again take some work om myself before I can do that. I have to be an example first and they need to be ready for doing the spiritual work. I agree with you on that one

I study for 20-40 minutes and take a 5-10 minute break. In that way, I do not have a tight schedule and I feel more relaxed and you might too if you apply it When I study, I make sure that I use a technique Callesen hollistic learning. It is a technique which was created by a guy called Scott Young. The overall idea of his learning style - according to me - is that you have to find connections between everything. A basic example would be: Guy gets angry --> punches the Wall --> leads to a hole in the Wall --> guy regrets his actions and gets sad --> leaves his house to drink to avoid pain. Now, you can also use this technique for any class (math physics history, bio, etc. This technique Will give you a more clear understanding and Will also help you explain a concept in class if you apply it to a specific topic and are asked to define it or an aspect of it. But only if you take notes. Make sure that you do so for every class. And make it a habit. It is the primary action that seperates top students from the average and even though it is a basic tip that is often told, it is essential to becoming a great student. Also write the notes in your own words actively. And make a commitment: It took me at least 6 months of working hard on my study skills every day to see signifigant improvements in my studying and it will also take time for you. Hope this helped you

Yeah, I agere. I think I my ego might be exaggerating regarding the consequences of sharing enlightment with otters. But then again I might also be lying to myself when I say that my ego is overexaggerating. It may be true that there is in fact painful consequences of sharing this information. I guess all I can do is to try really What happened when you told people about enlightment if you have ever done so? Would love to hear your story

Hi, people on the Actualized.org forum My name is Christian and I am a teenager. I have this friend who I currently live with at a boarding school. We are room mates. And it is not a fun experience. He is always on the look out for the things that I have not done yet (cleaning my room), (hanging out with friends), not doing my homework. And then he tries to get me to do those things and when I say "no" he does NOT accept it at all. He - in fact - raises his voice and yells at me that I will not do it anyway and that makes me so angry and frustrated. Other times he tells me that I have ruined his day because I do not obey him and that makes me feel sorrow towards him even though deep down I know it is him that is toxic and needs help because he a huge chunk of his life on what I am doing. Not on what he wants to create of his own. Another thing he does is that when he has a problem (ie. the teacher did not show up to help him, someone told him something that he did not like at the time, or something different that is negative, he always talks about that to me.And I am so tired of it. I can't stand it because I get affected by it negatively quite a lot. I want to leave him because I can not stand being in a relationship where I am constantly judged and expected to do things and when I say "No" the person (he) gets mad. Also because he does not bring a lot of joy and has no compelling life purpose. I want you guys to try to help me. What's your opinion on this? Kind Regards Christian

@Natasha I see this person each day. We live on a school and we are roommates. Therefore, the first step for me is to move out which I will be doing. But then I am know that he will still come to see me every single day (when I have moved out) because he has no friends but me and a few others at this stage. And if I have to cut him off I am going to have to tell him that I have to leave him. And that is very difficult for me even though I am certain that it is right for me to do. What can I do that will give me the courage/strength to make myself tell him that I have to leave him? Your advice would be appreciated

This idea is great and I also have the same problem (to an extend) so I also want to see a video from Leo covering this topic

Thank you so much for the suggestions, guys. I really appreciate them and I will of course try to identify the limiting stories and beliefs that I have about how I am being perceived in social situations as well as my perception of other people. Actually - even now - I am thinking about some of the stories that I visualize very vividly that people are trying to make fun of me/criticize me for my personal traits. And I know logically that it is just another thought and it is not reality, but even though I know this logically, that does not make the negative emotional attachment from these beliefs go away and it is the emotions that are attached that for me is the problem because they make me defensive and make me want to hide from other people. I believe that I have this fear because - first of all - I have gotten a diagnosis for autism which has created a lot of limiting beliefs/dogmas about my social abilities. This has then created a self-fulfilling prophecy because now I act as if I am this person with a social problem and that has just made people feed in to the belief with more emotionally intense stories about me which of course are NOT true. I do not believe that I have autism and I know that I can take control of my life and change the crippling effects that the previous story about me being autistic has had on my life up until this point. I just need some help on how to figure out how to permanently change my belief and start all over again and that was what I had hoped that Leo or really anybody could do for me. I would really appreciate if you guys would share some ideas, books, techniques or something else in order to help me because I really need it Greetings form Denmark <3

From personal experience, when I decided that I wanted to be a great student in the beginning of 9th grade, I didn't just start acting. I started with a sense of confidence and vision about me achieving excellence and then I began to study all of the correct techniques/principles and I ended up achieving my goal 18-months later. And to compare with this scenario of me wanting to socialize, I feel that I also need that initial belief and motivation to take the right action so wouldn't it also be good to incorporate positive visualization into the process of developing my social abilities along with of course taking massive action and actually doing the work?

As a socially unaware and awkward person, I would love if you could make a video about how you mastered every facit of social skills such as communication - how to read body language, social cues, eye contact, speaking, how to come across as an interesting person, how to listen, how to make a good response. Now, I do not want you to go in depth about each subject, but you should still cover each facit briefly. Instead, I would rather have you suggest different ressources where us viewers can learn these things so that we can get the big picture understanding and learn all the different distinctions nuances about each topic. That would be amazing ?