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  1. @Serotoninluv Thank you very much. I appreciate your help and your comments!
  2. I think so, for example just sitting quietly and just being one with my surroundings. I'm not too sure about the phrase "spirit is present" this is the first time thinking about it. I would say though that spirit (God) is always here with us in this very moment and is here in the now.
  3. @Serotoninluv When talking about I AM, I identify "me" or the "I"as the spirit and not the ego "There is spirit" doesn't make sense because it seems like "there" is separating or making "two" out of "one" (the spirit)
  4. I feel I've overcomplicated Enlightenment when it comes to understanding what it actually is. (I have not studied what enlightenment and non-duality is) and I don't know exactly if what I feel I am is the result of meditating, contemplation and introspection. Which has in effect possibly caused me to become enlightened (I'm not sure) I do feel like a "different person" so much more than before because I was drastically different in the way I behaved understood life. (very low consciousness) I can't say for sure what has shifted my perspective on becoming identified as the spirit or a soul rather than being the mind and body. I agree in the end it is just a word, and that all is god and that is amazing. Yes, I am curious about enlightenment and what it all means and that's what I really like about actualized.org as it has a lot of amazing content but what I am also interested in is how can I continue to improve myself in a way where I can learn to develop new ideas and skills so that I can apply it in the real world so that I can make a true difference in the lives of people by uplifting and supporting and eventually teaching them what I have learned in the short time I've been on this earth. (one way I've found is to watch videos on youtube and read books and develop my inner being by meditating and self-reflection.
  5. I found a video on Actualized.org Titled: The Enlightened Self One way Leo describes this is being pure transparent empty awareness (that's deep if you really think about it lol) To better understand this, I think I will take some time to watch this one, once or twice
  6. Yes, it was very gradual. I've had many awakenings but it didn't become a sudden thing until I had an interest in putting an effort & focus into meditation, contemplation & self-reflection. Thinking about life and trying to understand the best I can what it means to me.
  7. I'm sure it would still feel very painful if my hand was cut off, it's possible my tolerance for physical pain would still be just the same as anyone else's but what I was talking about is emotional pain. I am in a constant state of joy rather than ever feeling pain or to feel emotional suffering
  8. I understand that I am not thoughts, I am not mind or a body. Would it be accurate to say I am spirit or a soul? I'm no expert but I have spent a lot of time contemplating and I have made some breakthroughs. For example my interpretation of how I view life has changed from how I looked at life before. I am free from any kind of pain and suffering, I am free from fears, and find pleasure in simplicity rather than having a "need" to constantly seek stimulation. (I don't get bored) Most importantly it feels as if my ego is dead. I have found to accept people with unconditional love and no longer judge people for their "faults or unconscious behaviour" When contemplating this subject, I overcame the idea that I am losing my mind during self-reflection which at some points were very intense. At times, I felt very weak with a racing heart and had shallow breathing. I'm not exactly sure but I also think I had a visual hallucination for a few seconds when I was contemplating who or what am I? Is it true to say that if someone realizes that they are one with other spirit's or souls or human beings (if that is correct to say) and that we are all one with God, source, the universe (one field of consciousness) that you have found Enlightenment? Also, I would really be interested in learning about, absolute being and what that means. Thanks everyone!
  9. Hey In my opinion, smoking might be one of the worst possible choices someone can make. I started to smoke when I was about 16 or so and was able to finally quit in 2012. I was at a pack and a half a day when I quit and I did it with help from having the nicotine patch. On my third try I was successful and haven't smoked since. I strongly encourage current smokers to keep trying to quit this expensive and health damaging habit. It is so sneaky that by the time you realize that it is doing damage to you, you might be so hooked that it might be too late for some. Like it was said in this thread you have to be "disgusted" by the idea of smoking that you want to give it up for good.
  10. At the age of 17 I had experienced my first episode of psychosis. Shortly after becoming hospitalized I was diagnosed as having Bipolar Disorder and have been living with this illness for the past 17 years. I am currently taking different medications to remain stable and considered by my Doctor to be in full remission with little to no symptoms. The reason why I am posting this, is to see if anyone else can describe how they had experienced their psychosis and what they were feeling at any given time during their madness. When I was sick, I was experiencing mostly delusions and manic behaviour and was losing touch with reality. I would like to know, for those of you who had gone down a similar road, how did you feel during that time? (your lived experience) One way I would explain the experience of psychosis is having a complete absence of fear with constant feelings of euphoria and unlimited energy. I was convinced that I was Jesus for a short time and that "everything made sense to me" or that "I had everything understood in life" on the other side of the coin I had periods of paranoia and was very afraid and even couldn't fall asleep for days. In the past ten years I've been recovering well and improving tremendously. I have yet to have a conversation with my doctor about how long I ought to be on all of the medications I am taking. A few years ago, I had developed type II diabetes as a result of some of the meds I am on now and would like to improve my health further one day by decreasing my dose If that is determined to be considered a good idea. For those of you who might be at the beginning stages of your diagnosis and are going through pain and suffering I just want you to know that you will get through it and that you need to be strong for yourself or even for the people you love. You might think that this has been the worst thing that has ever happened to you but I am willing to say that I can bet you will come out stronger than you have ever been before.