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Everything posted by MIARIVEL
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@Nicolas Probably why he accepted my application to help moderate his forum. He's awesome. I hope to be as good as him one day.
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@Orange some great advice on here. I would suggest to write out what your ideal life would look like. What is it that you would like to be doing on a daily basis? and then start incorporating these things into your daily routine bits at a time so you are not overwhelmed with everything you want to do. Next have a goals list, what do you want to achieve today? this week? this month? heals goals, family goals, study goals, relationship goals etc. For every goal write down a timeframe in which you wish to achieve these goals. You have yourself mini projects, track this so you can see your own progress. I love doing this for myself and I have lists for everything. I love the feeling of crossing something off my list and seeing everything I have achieved from that list. This gives me a sense of accomplishment.
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@Magnifico Do you have meetup.com in your contry/area? Its a great way to find more like minded people.
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@Lorcan I am very impressed that a 14 year old is focusing his time on reading books on personal development and wanting to improve himself and his lifestyle choices. I think at this age it is normal to kill time every now and then to do some fun things. However if you want to feel like your living a more structured and productive life, I would suggest making a list of what your ideal day would look like and instead of trying to make major changes at once, you can start incorporating bits by bits into your daily routine. Time to write down some goals and the time frames in which you wish to achieve certain goals. This helps with feeling more productive like you are not wasting time as well as being satisfied and happy with how you choose to spend your time. Some things I would of told my 14 year old self: * Read as many personal development, psychology, understanding human behaviour and self mastery books as you can as this will be very rewarding for you in the future * Don't invest too much of yourself and time in intimate relationships and if you do (because your so in love with someone) don't allow it to consume you. Make sure you learn independence from a young age and keep doing what makes you happy - running, spending time with friends, studying. Don't ever stop your life for someone else. * I used to hate studying but I wish I put all my effort into being the best I could be at school. Its pays off later believe me. Education is important. * Always put your health first, it is easy putting off little things like regular Dr appointments, dentists even your psychological, mental and emotional health - always put this first so you can always do whatever you want to do at your best self. * Stop watching so much TV and reading gossip magazines and if its not helping you grow and educating you - then it is a waste of time and if you do choose to do these things, don't spend hours consumed in it. * Learn emotional intelligence and how to be mentally tough. There will be so many challenging situations that will test you in life and if you develop a strong frame of mind and learn to control your emotions and mindset - this will be the greatest tool you could ever have throughout life as you will be able to handle any situation a lot stronger, smarter and wiser. They are just a few tips, hope this helps.
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@Harvey Personally I read one book at a time as I feel like I accomplish things a lot quicker and it motivates me to read my next book. One tip that I used to do in University when there were just endless pages in huge textbooks was skimming through the contents of the book, reading all the sub headings, read all the first paragraphs and conclusions, going through the questions at the end of the chapter to see if there is anything I need to go over with in more detail. I don't focus too much on every single big word I don't understand or know the meaning of. I keep skimming through paragraphs getting the gist of it by the subheadings. Sometimes we think we need to know everything to gain understanding of it all but this is not necessarily the case. Google how you can learn to read faster, there are plenty of techniques you can try for yourself.
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@Nicolas Ahh we all love Leo. I think I have gone through all of his video's and as a life coach myself have taken notes on most of his videos. He has helped many of us with our personal growth and helped shaped the type of people we choose to become. Off the top of my head the videos that have stood out to me: * How to master and control your emotions * How to start a business * How to stop being a victim * How to stop worrying * Overcoming adversity Ok there's actually too many too name lol but they are just a few..
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@Hardik jain I am exactly like you, I don't like having nothing to do and I don't see the point of doing nothing. I can however, sit and read a book for hours or learn something new / study, watching something educational on youtube or the tv but whatever I am doing, I am making sure I am not wasting time just for the sake of wasting time. I like to be productive in what I choose to do. Have you tried meditation? perhaps this can be a great start to finding quiet time to yourself without all the chaos?
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@username life is what you create it to be, your perception, your interpretations, your opinions on everything and everyone. Your world is created by what is created in your mind. Yes genuine love and relationships are possible but it is very rare to find. Like a needle in a hay stack.
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@Beam how does the saying go.. God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change things that I can and the wisdom to know the difference...
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@spicy_pickles The thing about giving people too many chances is that we are showing them that their unacceptable behaviour is okay. If something doesn't feel right, makes you unhappy or doesn't align with your beliefs or values then its time to cut your losses. I mentioned in another post that I used to think I needed people and external things to make me happy or I could never be happy with just myself and my own presence. I used to get attached to people that I love and gave people more chances than they deserved, but in the end you are only hurting yourself and it really isn't worth investing your time, effort and energy into these people. Its normal to feel guilt sometimes because we don't want to hurt others but at the end of the day, we need to do what is best for us and move forward the best we can. You still have the choice to be a nice person, when people are being horrible to you, you don't have to sink on their level (although it is easy sometimes to react than to think rationally in the heat of the moment). Exercising mindfulness and challenging your thoughts, you learn over time and with practice that mean people have no effect on you. Learn emotional intelligence - its a great way to handle any situation. One of the hardest things I've had to learn is having peace within me and my mind. You can't always control what other people say or do but you can control how you react to these type of people and it pisses people off more when you don't sink on their level and react. Although sometimes it is hard to way away because of guilt and caring for someone, usually its the better thing to do for both of you... to just walk away.
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@dboyle The journey of independence and personal development is the most rewarding gift you could ever give yourself. People will always come and go throughout your life, some stick around for a long time others persue a different journey without us. For me personally, I learnt that people in general persue happiness because we think it comes from outside of ourselves when it is the complete opposite. Happiness starts and ends with us. People, objects and circumstances happen to us to enhance our life, to add to our life or teach us a valuable lesson we have to learn in order to grow and move forward. They are by no means here to consume our life and define our happiness. I used to think I needed certain people in my life to make me happy and complete, and to feel fulfilled but when we go through life grabbing one thing after another, we start to attach ourselves to the psychical things, ideas and opinions about ourselves and the world around us of how things are supposed to be. Possessions can be lost and people will sometimes leave our life - we need to learn not to attach ourselves to anything or anyone and accept life for what it is. You will learn as you get older, you will be more wise with you choose to call a friend and the type of people you want to surround yourself with, you will find that these people will be like minded people like you, the others will just pass by and this is okay. It may be a lonely road sometimes (and God only knows I have experienced loss and learning to be my own best friend through adversity) but life is always full of surprises. No need to regret anything that happens in life, its either a blessing or a lesson.. which helps you grow either way.
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A happiness list seems like an excellent idea. Gives us so many reason to be greatful for in this life.
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@username Life is whatever you make it. Your thoughts become your reality so talk nicely to yourself
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@jes everything is a decision. You are applying yourself as the victim. You have the power to not play the victim and be the victor. Everything all comes down to how badly you want something. That what drives motivation, determination and persistence.
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@zer0 You only think that you can't wake up early because in all honesty it all comes down to laziness. It is so easy to stay in your warm bed and not get up straight away when the alarm goes off. You could be too comfortable, still tired, its too cold to get up - there are thousands of excuses you can use because you 'can't' get up early in the morning. Its all in the way you think. I never used to be a morning person but once I am awake, I keep telling myself its time to get up and conquer the day and I wake up excited because I love my job and I am ready for any challenges that come my way. Exams can be daunting but make the most of the time you have now, if that means getting up earlier - then get up earlier. Put your alarm clock far away so when it goes off you can still hear it but you have to get up to turn it off and when you get up - stay up.
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MIARIVEL replied to rush's topic in Spirituality, Consciousness, Awakening, Mysticism, Meditation, God
@rush I you tube everything. There are so many different meditation techniques that you just have to try a few and find out which one works for you =) Meditation is known to be very beneficial for the soul and clearing the mind. -
You have the power to control this =)
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MIARIVEL replied to DizIzMikey's topic in Spirituality, Consciousness, Awakening, Mysticism, Meditation, God
@DizIzMikey Have you seen a Dr? There was a situation I went through once, something happened in my life and i stopped eating and I ended up making myself really sick but one day when I threw up after being sick for so long I did feel a sense of relief and started to feel better again. Could be totally different to what your talking about, but sometimes its better to let it out then keep it in. -
@Blaze35 A health and fitness coach could be beneficial. I have one who I speak with about my diet and fitness and she even helps me with my schedule and when I should certain types of foods etc. To me, it has been a great investment.
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@JoseM I guess if you are asking that question you don't really know what you want. I don't think you are ready for a committed relationship by what you have said, however I don't think its a bad thing to have casual thing with women so long as you are both on the same page with where you both stand with things. Sometimes it is scary the thought of settling down with one person, especially for a guy and it doesn't matter how old you are. I don't think anyone should just settle because 'its the right thing to do' or 'society says that this is how it should be'. Do what makes you happy and if you decide to get into a committed relationship, make sure you are ready to give everything to someone else and be committed. If not, then just have fun.
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@isabel It is true what others have said here. Sometimes we make bad decisions and we don't know it at the time (for example, sometimes we can't help who we fall in love with) and then later find out that person was bad for us. But everything in life is a lesson and everyone who comes into our life is here to teach us a lesson or is a blessing to our life. Don't waste time blaming yourself for any of this. It has no purpose blaming yourself. Learn to forgive yourself, know that what has happened is horrible, but know that you are going to do everything in your power to make the rest of your life the best of your life. Let go of the pain, the guilt and every feeling that does not serve you, work on you and bettering yourself, making wiser decisions in the future, and don't let this be a set back, keep moving forward.
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MIARIVEL replied to NutellaTC's topic in Spirituality, Consciousness, Awakening, Mysticism, Meditation, God
@NutellaTC You choose what you focus on and think about. Sometimes I have memories I do not want to think about because it changes my mood and brings me down but I always have a back up plan to distract myself and change my focus on something more positive and something that is going to serve me. You should try it too. As hard as it seems sometimes you are in control of your thoughts and emotions and sometimes you just need to be sad and have a cry or be angry for a while, but don't stay down too long. Make a decision to make the rest of your life the best of your life =) -
@JohnnyBoy I used to be like this. See the thing about our ego and they way our mind works is most people love to stay comfortable. So many people do not progress in life because they do not challenge the way they think, their behaviour or their perspective on situations. What others say about you is a reflection of them and not of you. The way you choose to respond to any given situation says a lot about your character. Before I used to react and not care what anyone would think of me after I have reacted but it did take me a long time to recognise the person I was and the person I am working so hard to be. People kept telling me "life is sometimes better when you don't give a shit about what other people think". Now I choose what and who I allow to affect to me. It can be hard sometimes when you just want to react to someone, but that just means your on that person's level of petiness (which you don't want to do). With some mindfulness and training / challenging your brain, it gets easier to walk away from people trying to bring you down (this just means that they are already below you) so don't give them the power to bring you down as well. Most times people want a reaction out of you because they want to know they have gotten to you, in which case this just makes them feel better about themselves. Don't give them this satisfaction. Train your ego to let it go and walk away, Silence is better than wasting your time on bullshi*
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@electroBeam What are you passionate about? What makes you happy and drives you to want to do more of it? Perhaps you are not finding satisfaction in doing these things because you are after something bigger and better or something more challenging? Why don't you try something that you are passionate about by getting outside of your comfort zone? something to challenge you and your mind? for me (being a life coach) I feared public speaking for as long as I could remember and I had people asking me to give talks to teenagers to motivate them, talk about confidence and self esteem and talk to corporate organisations to motivate staff to love their job and who they work for more. I was absolutely terrified of the thought of doing this but knowing that being a coach is my passion and purpose, i felt the fear and did it anyway and I never looked back. This then opened the door to more opportunities for me. So maybe think about what could be something to challenge yourself on in relation to personal development. Dont think of anything you are doing as a waste of time, I believe anything to do with personal development (weather you realise it or not) is helping to develop you in some way or another. Weather you are learning something great from the experience or you've learnt that this isn't really for you and to try something else. Its all about growing and learning and developing.
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@Obi berjaoui I have been in your position before trying to apply for every job out there only for it to be a tough market. I signed up to pretty much every job agency I could and I even applied for jobs I didn't want to do (like waitressing or even working in a supermarket). Even finding something temporary like this till you find a better job is good for now. Maybe working on your interview skills too or even studying (self study if you have to) on business or research more of the field you would really like to get into. This will all help keep your mind active and ready for when opportunity arises. To find your passion / purpose - Brainstorm and find things that make you happy, do you like helping others? do you like fitness and health? do you love cooking? creating art? perhaps an office environment or maybe the outdoors, the possibilities are endless. Start with trial and error, I tried so many different things till I found what my passion/purpose is and that's when I fell in love with coaching and became a coach myself. Make the best of the time you have now, it is great that you are keeping fit, eating right. Read some books, maybe attend some free networking events? have you tried meetup.com? expending your social network is a great way to make new connections and even try out a few things to see if they interest you. There are meditation groups, walking groups, business groups - I suggest check it out. Keep up with the positive attitude and determination and something good will come your way.
