Abeo Maria

@Sarper really like the song you posted. I love high quality music as well that still puts me in a sort of meditative state but still has a nice deep rhythm. Do you have any other song recommendations?

Right Now by Samantha James it takes me away everytime

Miami, Florida

I'm battling staying present and focused with each task that I'm doing, but my brain has a way of mentally reviewing what else I can achieve in the day. I have a daily planner with about 5 core things I'd like to accomplish in the day, they can be done at any time of the day so long as they are complete. While I'm doing one task my mind naturally freaks out and thinks the walls of the day are closing in and that I'm wasting time getting to the next task. I am working on incorporating more meditation but I still find myself thinking often and visualizing about "my next step" or task. If I'm in the car, I'm thinking about what needs to be done when I get home, etc; Any advice on how to relax a bit while still productively pursuing those accomplishments for the day? Thanks in advance

@BeginnerActualizer really resonate with this one. I'll definitely implement this thanks so much! @Jsimpson I agree with it. I start my day off with exercise, it's the one that require that least amount of thought and my energy is at it's peak when I first wake up afterwards my goal is to practice guitar for half an hour (with a goal of 2 hours per day), then I let the other priorities fall into place. Now I just have to give each thing I'm doing absolute focus

@Elemental I see what you're saying. Definitely will start implementing even if it alters the list around. I truly appreciate it, thanks you

@Leo Gura what do think the hardest part of Self-Actualization has been thus far? The biggest personal challenge you had to or are still overcoming?

I would highly recommend watching Youtube videos or reading books about detachment from emotions. I would also watch @Leo Gura's many videos about meditation and the mind. He describes it as monkey chatter in the most severe way. All our past experiences are non existent, the only way they stay alive is by our constant, repetitive thoughts on the subject. A lot of us hear a negative thought in our minds and connect with, and then react to it. So for example if I'm feeling depressed and/or hopeless and I keep thinking sad thoughts or self destructive thoughts, your mind/body are going to try to react to that and cope with the uncomfortable feelings that are being suppressed. Your thoughts will tell you to have a drink to numb the pain, because the pain is uncomfortable and we try to avoid it at all costs. Self-Harm becomes our avenue of coping and it only destroys us in the end. I would definitely suggesting trying meditation. Just sitting with your thoughts and not reacting to them. Sit down in a room with them, and let them pass like rolling clouds. Feel the emotions, no matter how uncomfortable. I thought about my dad recently because he's had two heart attacks and now diabetes. My thoughts were going crazy and negative and I wanted so desperately to have a shot of tequila or something to numb the pain of my thoughts, but instead I went into a room and embraced the thoughts, just let them dance around my head and sat as still as I could. Eventually the thoughts went away.

I think every situation is unique and that's one of the things @Leo Gura talks about as far as authenticity and being the "author" so to speak of your own experience. If you feel it's causing a dual nature in yourself, not born of a place of peace and awareness then do what you need to do. Everyone is different and weed affects everyone differently on their journey. It's up to you to place its value in alignment with your self development work. From personal experience I don't like to smoke weed. I used to smoke it every day and it felt like I was cheating. It felt like weed was opening up feelings, moods, emotions, consciousness in me that already existed. The weed only unveiled it so to speak. Knowing that it wasn't that weed creating the feeling, more so just opening me up to the feeling, I started realizing it takes a lot of work and a slow-steady stream of consistency to mastery to get to those same feelings weed can provide for you. It's an easier route with weed for sure. But like I said, definitely be the author of your own experience and do what you believe may or may not work for you.

@Roxanne I've been with my high school sweetheart, since I was 14. I'm now 24. He isn't on a self actualized path or at least he's never laid it out directly. however, I think it's extremely important to never want to impose your views on another person. What's made our relationship work is how open I am with this part of my life. A lot of the time he nods his head, even though I can tell he's not quite with me. However our relationship has only reaped benefits from doing the self actualized work. I accept him for who he is, because I am enough and have no desire for him to be anything other then who he represents himself as. Because I don't follow the crowd, and challenge many norms he finds these things interesting and often times we have plenty of conversations about it. Where it gets a little bit gray is my avoidance of television, my insistence on meditation, my journaling and watching and reading personal development books, however I don't preach it to my husband, I just live in my own truth and through that we have come to a wonderful place of acceptance in each other. I think going into a relationship knowing personal development is essentially a one-man journey helps alleviate the pressures you may face in a relationship.

Summer Madness by Kool and the Gang It has no lyrics, which is why I love it. The feel of the song leads me to feeling more self actualized in the moment.

Name: Abeo Maria Age: 24 Gender: Female Location: Miami, FL Occupation: BPO and RA Data Entry Marital Status: Married Kids: No Hobbies: playing guitar, travel, exploration, reading, enlightenment, healthy eating, and nature I've always been on the cusp of personal development, since a really young age. I used to write in journals and create short stories of both dystopia and utopia's. When I was 22, I was depressed and neurotic to the core, I remember reading Eckhart Tolle's book; A New Earth and it resonated with me in a way that made me feel both a part of something and isolated. I thought I couldn't relate to anyone about personal development and the ill's of the world. However I kept reading, I kept reflecting, I kept journaling, not quite sure where to turn. I moved to Arizona when I was 23, and spent all of my time disconnecting from electronics, reading personal development books, eating healthier and hiking. The combination of these opened my eyes to seeking a deeper existence so to speak. Personal challenges I've overcome: Bipolar Disorder and Depression Extreme shyness Consistent negative self talk Fear and Anxiety of almost any and everything Stripping myself of herd mentality Building healthy, progressive morning routines What I'm working on now: continuing to expand my knowledge of the guitar eating a healthier diet in lieu of my father's recent diabetic diagnosis relaxing and enjoying where i'm at right this moment continuing to think outside of the box and to not be afraid of change and creating a new way of life for myself

@Avi and @rrodriguez11 I think authenticity can make different things to different people depending on their journey in life. Authenticity could be expressing your opinions and beliefs and shouting them from atop a mountain and not being afraid to do so. However for some authenticity could be knowing that it's not a part of their nature to impose those beliefs on other people? Do you see what I'm saying? Like you mentioned @Avi i think authenticity is more about being present. Because who we are isn't full identification with our thoughts and emotions anyway if we let them speak for us all the time, how would we know if that's the true nature of ourselves? I think authenticity is more in the form of what you do then what you say and how you say it? Your actions or lack their of speak to the truth about you, more then anything else, at least that's my take on it. Authenticity is more about yourself then others. If you feel connected to a higher purpose, challenged, content, optimistic etc; it would seem that you have reached a point of truth within yourself. If you feel scared, anxious, nervous it means that your relationship with yourself is fear based.

@TveinDenis i think this will be something we face until the die we day. it's the flux and flow of life. i can guarantee most people experience these moments where we stray off course. For me when a day is going bad, especially due to breaking one of my "rules", the first thing I do is let go of the disappointment. I don't connect to it. I'm not saying I try to change the mood I'm in it, but I don't fight it either. I usually stop whatever I'm doing and just let those "bad feelings" do their dance around my head. So for example one of my rules is to not browse the internet all day, sometimes without much realization I end up doing that. So when I catch myself doing that and the bad feelings start coming up. I grab a journal and I write why it was I didn't want to browse the internet all day in the first place. Reconnecting will help alter my subconscious and get me on a better track to try again the next day. After I do that, I just literally let the feelings do what they want. Bad feelings are gonna come, but I think it's knowing how impermanent they are, that makes them not have a strong hold on us. Also going for a walk and putting on positive music is helpful, as is doing something kind for someone, like calling a friend or family member and seeing how they are doing and giving someone your full attention. Take the attention off you and soon those feelings will melt into the atmosphere like they always do

@Marina makes perfect sense. I've always felt that way internally, but wasn't able to articulate it the way that you have. I think my toughest thing is doing things differently then how they are done now. Because think about it, it's so common to spend 95% of our time with a cell phone in our hands, commenting, tweeting, liking photos etc; it's almost "weird" to NOT do that this day and age. We are a society of comparison and judgement and it gets overwhelming to play "keep up". Thanks for taking the time to explain the benefits. Would definitely love to continue hearing more from you throughout this forum about various topics

@Psychonaut i can definitely relate to swimming being that meditative state. That's how I feel when I play the guitar. I'm so enveloped in the art of creating that my thoughts are more repetitious from an action stand point then about emotions etc; Thanks for sharing that with me.

Personally, my favorite music has no lyrics/words to it. I love listening to smooth jazz, classical, or anything techno trance as long as it's smooth and doesn't have much of a hardcore beat. If I'm working out, I definitely like motivational songs with lyrics, but if I'm just driving my car or cleaning the house or walking the dog, I tend to feel more in a meditative state and more at peace when I'm not identifying to actual words and am just objectively listening to the music.

@Psychonaut thanks for sharing. Do you do that as the very first thing in the morning? I usually work out first. Do you find doing the meditation most beneficial to first waking up?

@Marina 1.5 years with no social media? That's pretty awesome. I still have facebook, but I only allow myself to go on the weekends. But I want to give it up altogether. It gives me anxiety and that neuroticism you mentioned. As far as journaling goes, sometimes it's as simple as writing down what I'm grateful for for the day, or sometimes it's just a random thought that enters my mind. I even consider myself journaling when I listen to the Self Actualized videoes by Leo and I just jot down certain notes and then read them back over at the end of the day. It just helps putting pen to paper. What are some changes you've noticed in your life by giving up facebook, twitter, etc; That's been the hardest struggle for me.

@Truth what kind of meditations do you do in the morning? I've been taking baby steps (as it's been difficult for me to sit down and meditate). I usually do a walking meditation as the sun is rising. But I'd also like to do some sitting down mediations. Do you have any personal advice or tips for those that are struggling with meditation and how you meditate?

I agree meditation is one of the most important morning rituals. I'm still struggling with committing to it, but I've seen the results and am a work in progress. My morning routines are kind of specific to my personal ambitions. I wake up in the morning, exercises for half an hour, do a walking meditation outside (as I catch the sunrise), then I play the guitar for half an hour, which then follows making a smoothie for breakfast and then half an hour of journaling. It's taken a long time to get to that stage and have had to eliminate distractions, such as my cell phone, television and browsing the internet. Once I shut those off for the morning, I'm better able to focus on the aforementioned.