Teen Taking On Life's Task

[TeenVisionary98]

10/26/2016

Hello to all my Self-actualization peeps!

My name's Michael, I'm 18 years old, and I've been immersing myself in self-help for about 6 months now. I'm nearly wrapping up Leo's Life Purpose Course, which I feel has drastically changed the trajectory in my life. I wanted to start this little journal for a couple of reasons. 

1)To surround me with like-minded people. Having done Leo's course and read 6 or 7 of his recommended books, I find that my mindset and beliefs on living a fulfilling life have been fundamentally shifted. I find that I don't think about a lot of the same things other kids my age think about. Before I started getting into personal development--I was in the social circle of High School kids that socialized a lot, attended and hosted parties, smoked weed regularly, and generally went with the flow of life. Fast forward to today, and I feel all of my peers are letting their most precious years of their life slip away. I decided that since no one around me aims to impact the world on the level that I do (yet), I should remove myself from the high school scene (I'm in a dual-credit program at a nearby community college) and focus on actualizing my Life's Purpose with a community holding higher conscious values.

2)To hold me accountable. Since no one in my age group is really there to support me on my journey, I wanted to create this journal for daily check-ins to keep note whether I completed my daily habits and also to track my progress.

3)Potentially bring together a Millenial MasterMind group (I'm coining this name LOL). Since youth are the future of our world, I was hoping to potentially attract other ambitious millennials who would possibly want to exchange support, wisdom, and insight with one another.

 

This wraps up my first post! Although it's currently 12:49 AM, I will technically be back later today with a check-in. As for now, I'm off to 

-meditate (10 minutes)

-Look over "me sheet" (2 minutes)

-Affirm and contemplate Life Purpose (10 minutes)

-Visualize my future (10 minutes)

 

 

 

"I expand in abundance, success, and love every day as I inspire those around me to do the same."

[TeenVisionary98]

Haven't kept up with my journaling on Actualized.org, but will transition from writing my morning journal entries on to here from now on. Also, on all the other habits I was supposed to maintain, none of them stuck. This goes to show that trying to incorporate too many habits at once can set you back. So, I decided to implement the habit of having a morning schedule. I don't remember where I heard it, but how you start you're day can say a lot about how you end it. Therefore, I plan on starting my day out strong. I have been doing this for almost a week, about a third of the way there from my 21 day challenge. I only got 3 to four hours of sleep last night, and I'm proud to say I still followed through on waking up at 8 and proceeding with my routine. 

 

So far, it's looking like this:

wake up, drink glass of water, smile, then stretch

brush my teeth while listening to Philosopher's Notes MP3 (great resource, check it out!)

Talk a walk while finishing up audio.

Get back home to visualize and imprint life purpose.

Proceed to journal

Reward myself with checking off that I followed through on my morning routine, and brew up an amazing smoothie.

 

I'll start today off will listing 5 things I'm thankful for. 

I'm thankful for the rain my beautiful city has to offer.

I'm thankful for being gifted another day in this world.

I'm thankful for the external forces guiding me towards achieving my full potential.

I'm thankful for the clothes on my back.

I'm thankful for being alive in the day and age.

 

Alright!

Just pondering on the ideas from "How to Exploit People..." video Leo made about not criticizing people's faults, but reflecting on ourselves after seeing some aspect of a person we don't like and thinking about how we may be doing that in our own life. This morning, after taking a walk, my cousin said to me, "You just went to smoke, you burn out!" I was caught off guard because

 

1) I haven't toked up in ages, and 

2) She had called suspected of me doing something I told her I don't do regularly, and

3) this was definitely her projecting her on situation on to me (she smokes everyday).

 

I thought, "wow, what made her want to do that?" Not taking it personal, I felt she acted this way towards me because I have been calling her out for smoking on a daily basis. I'll notice her facial expressions, and be like, "haha You're high, aren't you?" Maybe she feels a bit attacked and criticized when I do this, because I certainly felt attacked for being called out, even though it was untrue LOL. 

 

Anyways, I suppose I should be more conscious of how I interact with her. That's all, for now! Time to go grab the day by it's balls.

[TeenVisionary98]

Happy morning!

 

I'm still recovering from my sleep deprived fiasco, but I'm proud to say that I toughed through my morning routine. I really really really did not want to get up this morning, but I remembered that this here is the foundation for how the rest of my day will turn out. I listened to the "Drive" philosopher's note, and one thing it brought was about Mastery being a mindset. Every day we need to aim to grow, even if it's just a little bit. To manage this, every night I will ask myself, "did I do better than yesterday?" If I didn't, I need to be strategic about what held me back, and how to grow from this experience. 

 

The last two days I've been staying up late, yet haven't managed to do everything I've wanted to. I think the issue is that I push the creative work I have to do until the end of the day, and then I'm not motivated to do it. Although I've been getting up at 8:00 consistently, I want to wake up earlier to have more time being in the right mindset. Also, I find that if I'm around my cousins, their unambitious mentality rubs off on me. I know we're supposed to surround ourselves with positive people, but what do you do if the only people around you are your family, and they turn out to be extremely UNmotivated? *Sigh, maybe I should not be around them at all during the day.

 

I've been taking copious notes on the Tedtalk book I'm reading. I am for sure 100% positive that I can read a book a week, but I'm really trying to amp it up. I'm thinking that I read a Self-help/actualization book a week, alongside a public speaking/autobiography/business book. 

 

New Deliberate Practice Method: Record myself giving an impromptu motivational speech with a beginning middle and end, and take notes on what I want to improve. Will do this in the morning right after my reading session. I'm FIRED UP just thinking about the growth I can have if I do this every day in the long run! My morning routine habit is about to reach a week pretty soon, meaning I have about two more weeks before I concrete it into my psyche. 

 

Almost forgot--5 things I'm grateful for are:

1. This delicious and nutritious smoothie I am drinking.
2. The shining sun on this beautiful Seattle morning
3. The fact that I got to wake up this morning to improve myself and the world around me
4. All the books I just bought for donating plasma
5. My loving mother who has sacrificed so much for me.

 

Alright, that's it for today, now its time to go put in some WORK. 

 

Edited November 3, 2016 by TeenVisionary98

[TeenVisionary98]

Yoooo, beautiful morning over here in Seattle.

 

I was compelled to wake up earlier than usual, and I do not regret it at all. There's something about waking up to still see a starry sky out. I only woke up at 6, but I plan on adjusting to 5:30, maybe even 5! 

 

Here are 5 things I am thankful for:

1. The roof over my head
2. Brian Johnson, from Philosopher's Notes, for starting my day off with a dose of wisdom.
3. The system of plasma donations. Saving lives while being compensated ($$$), which funds my book supply.
4. Being able to wake up another day to improve from yesterday.
5. The delicious smoothie I'm about to drink.

This morning, I learned about Leonardo's impeccable physical abilities. Apparently, cardiovascular exercise can make us smarter because it allows more oxygen to reach our brain. Instead of walking this morning, I had the urge to jog and I feel great because of it. My only concern is what the impacts of it may be because I don't eat breakfast until after my morning routine. 

 

Update on goals: 

I'm on the track to reading one book per week, but I feel I could go higher by reading two books a week. This week I only read one, but it was on public speaking. I'm thinking that I could read one personal development book, and then another of some sort (public speaking, coaching, biographies, business, etc). 

 

Also, I've decided to incorporate meditation right before this because I realized that my morning routine is a habit in itself, which means I wouldn't be focusing on multiple habits at a time. In the past, I've found that developing multiple habits, in the end, leads to no progress. I'm officially on my second week, which is supposed to be the deciding factor in whether I follow through on my goals--and I definitely see me doing so. 

 

Alright, that's all I have to say for the moment. Time to go kick some ass.

 

 

"I expand in abundance, success, and love every day as I inspire those around me to do the same."

[TeenVisionary98]

So, today I woke up at 3:30...totally unintentional. Maybe it was the fact that I intended on waking up earlier than usual, or because I didn't eat dinner--but I assume this will help me transition to waking up at 4:30 in the morning. I find that as long as I follow through on my morning routine habit, it doesn't matter how early I wake up unless it's super late, which I feel starts my day off slow.

 

The Philosopher's Note I listened to this morning was on "Ego is the Enemy." It brought up the idea of not being passionate, which surprised me because I believe we should be passionate about our craft. The author, Ryan Holiday, says to "Leave passion for the amateurs and the delusional. Make it about what you feel you must do and say, not what you care about and wish to be. Then you will do great things. Then you will stop being your old, good-intentioned, but ineffective self." So, when it comes to writing and delivering speeches, I must always ask myself "How can I create something meaningful?" I like to think that I do go into speech preparation doing that, but I feel like I must start visualizing myself delivering meaningful messages rather than seducing myself with the idea of speaking in front of thousands of people. 

 

Anyways, headed to another Toastmaster's meeting on this Saturday morning. This club was voted the "best public speaking club," so I'm hoping to find a potential mentor there. I learned that mentorship is a two-way beneficial relationship. Obviously, I acquire wisdom and guidance from the mentor, but I'm not exactly clear on what I offer back. I watched a TEDTalk on how to get a mentor, and the speaker said we offer our strengths and vitality. 

 

I read one book this week on public speaking, and I'm learning to speed read to raise that number. I plan on practicing on Arnold Schwarzenegger's biography, which is supposed to be super inspiring. I started a blog where I post the notes I take on books and plan on promoting it on this forum because of the value it might serve to others.

 

Oh yea, almost forgot! 5 things I am grateful for:

1. The sound of rain outside.

2. The cold, refreshing smoothie I'm about to blend up.

3. The vast amount of resources accessible to us in this day in age. 

4. The fact that I got my ticket to go to TEDx Seattle!!!

5. This community, and especially Leo. 

 

Alright, that's all for today. Quick side note, my visualization practice is starting to affect on how I interact with others. I'm finding that I'm more confident, enthusiastic, and playful. Thank you, Psycho-Cybernetics!

 

 

"I expand in abundance, success, and love every day as I inspire those around me to do the same."

Edited November 5, 2016 by TeenVisionary98

[TeenVisionary98]

So glad to see a sunny day here in Seattle!

I sure do love the fact that I got an extra hour of sleep thanks to Day Light savings along with my usual sleep-in allowance on Sundays. I still followed through on that morning routine, though! 

 

I started the Arnold Schwarzenegger bio yesterday and this guy was FOCUSED, even from such a young age. His ambition in bodybuilding and the discipline he developed carried on to every other aspect of your life. After I concrete this morning routine habit, my health and fitness goals are next on my habit check-list. If what Arnold says is true, by disciplining myself to master my body, I should be able to carry that will power into any other area in my life that I want to improve. This reminded me of something that was said in "The Power of Habit," about exercising our willpower to gain more willpower. Health and fitness is the perfect field to develop willpower!

 

5 things I am grateful for:

1. The shining sun on this beautiful Saturday morning.
2. That extra sleep time
3. The roof over my head
4. the delicious smoothie I'm about to drink
5. All the mentors I have and will have in my life. 

Alright, off to go put in WORK. 

 

"I expand in abundance, success, and love everyday as I inspire those around me to do the same."

Edited November 6, 2016 by TeenVisionary98

[TeenVisionary98]

It's a nice feeling to have done a lot before the sun has even risen. 

This morning, however, my body did not want to get up. I had this throbbing headache out of nowhere. I thought maybe I was upper limiting, so I sucked it up and pushed through. After hydrating and getting that morning jog in, my morning routine flowed by smooth. 

 

Having read more of Arnold Schwarzenegger's autobiography, I became more aware of the power of visualization. Arnold was not only driven by the sport of bodybuilding, but by the vision he had of competing and winning Mr. Universe. He had images of his bodybuilding idols on his walls that he studied, and constantly thought about what it would take for him to get there. Although I have my own vision board, this makes me want to grab pictures of all my idols and plaster them all over my wall.

 

This, coincidently, goes hand in hand with what I'm reading in the "Path of Least Resistance." Robert Fritz states we should live in the orientation of the creative, manifesting our dreams using the creative process:

 

1) Conceive of the result you want to create.

2) Know what currently exists.

3) Take action (learning what and what doesn't work along the way).

and some others.

 

To me, this basically says anything is possible is you can see your end result so vividly, that the process of getting there is organically formed along the way.  Powerful, powerful stuff.

 

Alright, enough reflecting. 5 things I am grateful for:

1) Books, books, and books!

2) The fact that I'm starting my journey relatively young. 

3) the power of the subconscious mind.

4) Les Brown.

5) The nutritious smoothie I'm about to drink. 

 

I've been gifted another day in life, it's up to me to make the most of it. 

 

 

"I expand in abundance, success, and love every day as I inspire those around me to do the same."

[TeenVisionary98]

Only have about a 2.5 hours of sleep in, but would you look at that--I still got up to follow through on my goals. I completely put myself in this position, so there's no point whining about it. I'm gonna grind through the last of my math hw so I can catch a couple zzz's before class.

 

It's funny how my family doesn't understand what I'm doing. They think it's not "normal" to wake up at 4:30 in the morning. They think it's not "normal" to be this focused. They think it's not "normal" to sacrifice doing what "normal" teenagers do. Well, guess what, normal people go on to live normal lives. 

 

I'm about half-way through "The Path of Least Resistance," I'm learning a lot about our tendencies to oscillate back and forth between our goals. In the past, I've motivated myself to get into shape because I wasn't in shape. Once I got a point where I felt good, I would stop taking action because the intensity of my original desire was lower. It wouldn't be long before I got back out of shape, starting the cycle over again. It's been FOUR YEARS that my ass has been trying to get in shape LOL, and all because of my damn reactive/responsive underlying structure. As soon as I finish implementing this morning routine habit, I'm going to use the wisdom I've learned from this book to create the body I've always wanted. I feel this is the next step in my essential habits because I will only be able to coach others if I feel I have mastered myself. 

 

Alright! 5 things I'm grateful for:

1. Google calendars for helping me plan out my day.

2. Leo's booklist

3. my lemon water

4. This community

5. Getting the opportunity to attend the TEDx Seattle after party, where I'll get to mingle with the speakers, organizers, and others!

 

That's it for today! Time to go make the most of it.

 

 

"I expand in abundance, success, and love every day as I inspire those around me to do the same."

[TeenVisionary98]

"I had a dream I would run the game and kill it."-Logic

That lyric has been stuck in my head since yesterday  and I'm starting to go crazy. Anyways, I came "upper limited," as Gay Hendricks likes to call it, by squabbling with my cousin about politics. Since last night was election night, of course the conversation was supposed to come up, but I did not imagine I would spend about an HOUR going back and forth. My participation caused me to go to bed later than I wanted, not getting the amount of sleep that I had hoped for. QUIT SQUABBLING. It leads to nowhere and takes up time and energy. 

 

Also, I haven't heard the results of the election yet, but I was thinking, what if Donald Trump really became president? How would this affect my life purpose? What I loved was realizing that I would still continue to learn about what makes a person reach their full potential and sharing what I learn just for the sake of doing it. The further I work at my life purpose, the more and more I'm realizing the importance of having a craftsman mentality. The work I do is out of love to see my creation exist. 

 

Anyways, here's 5 things I'm grateful for in my life

1. Meetup.com, where I'll be attending my first two seminars in the weeks to come.
2. My camera, allowing to deliberately practice my communication skills on a daily basis.
3. My mom, because she has helped to provide all the resources I need to progress.
4. Jim Carrey, for giving me the idea of writing a million dollar check to myself.
5. High-speed internet. 

 

Alright, time to go make my smoothie!

 

"I expand in abundance, success, and love everyday as I inspire those around me to do the same."

[TeenVisionary98]

So Donald Trump is the president-elect of the USA...did not see that one coming. I realized that many people didn't like either of the candidates, and some would vote for one out of fear of the other winning. In "The Path of Least Resistance," this is what Fritz referred to as "choice by elimination,"  which puts people in a position where the feel they are controlled by circumstances when having to choose the lesser of two evils. This was seen with tragic consequences in places like Central America, the Middle East, and Africa--which seems to be where America is going. 

 

I let the whole negativity bog me down after writing my journal entry yesterday when I initially found out who had won, but then I realized that it was just a distraction from doing what I needed to do. Shout out to Infinite Waters (Diving Deep) for helping me understand that. So let's start this day off on a good note.

5 things I am grateful for:

1. My Toastmasters club, which is full of great people.
2. Amazon same-day delivery.
3. Robert fritz, for shining light on the creative process
4. All my mentors from the books I read
5. My cousin, Hilary, for providing heartfelt conversations

 

Alright, there it is. Let's keep the positivity flowing. 

 

 

"I expand in abundance, success, and love everyday as I inspire those around me to do the same."

[TeenVisionary98]

Want to start off my thanking all the men and women who have given service to this country. Although it's a holiday, NO DAYS OFF BABY. Had my butt up at 4:30. My uncle and grandma always ask, "Michael, why must you get up so early? Don't you know that's not normal?"

I just think, "If you knew where my future was headed, you'd want to get up early too." LOL

I'm getting close to finishing the Path of Least Resistance, and one think has been irking me since yesterday's reading. I want to make the fundamental choice to be the predominant creative force in my life, but because I'm still taking college classes for my mom, I feel that I'd still be in a responsive/reactive structure. Right now I've concentrated my energy on developing three areas within my life purpose: researching books (personal development, coaching, business), public speaking (Toastmasters, shooting daily videos, reading), and reading and writing skills. However, I still have math homework and other classes on the side I have to worry about, that only takes up my time. 

It's all good, though. Time will pass.

5 things I am grateful for:

1. Past and future veterans. 
2. Messenger, allowing me to talk to my mom in London.
3. The roof over my head, although it has a leak
4. Breakthrough Rapid reading, for increasing my reading speed
5. Amazon affiliate, where I will be pulling in cash from affiliate marketing.

I have one week left until I finish my 21-day challenge in implementing my morning ritual--pretty proud about that. I would not have seen myself getting up at 4:30 in the morning two months ago, but it has helped my productivity tremendously. After this, I plan to implement a fitness routine in order to master my body. Habits are KEY.

 

Alright, time to go make this SMOOTHIE. I'm out of flax and hemp seeds, almond milk, and greens--shit. Guess I'll have to improvise!

 

"I expand in abundance, success, and love every day as I inspire those around me to do the same."

[Zane]

I'm loving your journal!! It's amazing how you're concretely applying Leo's Life Purpose course! I love how you're disclosing what you're grateful for and I'm proud of you for discovering your life purpose at a young age! Most people your age lack a sense of trajectory or are uncertain or are lost but it's great that you're implementing these new habits. I also love how you're getting yourself back on track and grounding yourself with a sense of purpose! 

[TeenVisionary98]

@Zane Thank you! It's really rare for me to hear something like that, so it means a lot. I appreciate your support and wish nothing but the best for you.

 

6:44 AM

This will be a short entry. My morning routine is running a bit longer than usual because I've been dreaming of new possibilities for my future, and I really wanted to take the time to visualize the outcomes. After finishing Arnold Schwarzenegger's biography and the Path of Least Resistance, I'm certain that picturing the results I want to create in my life is the most important step in accomplishing any goal. I did an exercise yesterday from the Path of Least Resistance that had me list all the results I wanted to come into creation when it occurred to me that on this list is essentially what my life will pan out to be. Along the way, I may find that some of the goals I have aren't as important anymore, but the fact that I have the tools to manifest any of them is incredibly inspiring. It's as if I've already accomplished them all, now it's just a matter of going through the motions while enjoying every step of the way. 

 

5 things I am grateful for:

1. Les Brown, who inspires me every day
2. The amount of freedom I have
3. Youtube
4. Robert Fritz
5. Arnold Schwarzenegger, who's focus reminds me of what is possible with the power of the human mind.

 

That's all for now! Getting ready to head to Toastmaster's, excited to put the practice of recording daily mini-speeches to use. 

 

 

"I expand in abundance, success, and love every day as I inspire those around me to do the same."

 

 

[Zane]

@TeenVisionary98 It's my pleasure to give you my full support! 

[TeenVisionary98]

Love my Sunday sleep-ins

I began "So Good They Can't Ignore You" and "The Business and Practice of Coaching" yesterday, and I'm pretty excited to see what I'm going to learn next. Every time I pick up a book Leo has recommended, I'm surprised at the insights I encounter. Rather than upload my notes to my blog altogether, I'm thinking I'll just go more in-depth into the key ideas. This gives me a chance to practice writing and explaining what I took away from each book I read. Because I read two books a week, one of them being personal development, I can see myself writing at least four blog posts a month targeted towards the self-help community. I may include posts on the other books I read, but that depends on whether I am reading about business, public speaking, or biographies that contribute to a person's self-actualization. That's at least 48 posts a year!

I think having a large collection of posts on the books I read will add to my credibility as someone qualified to coach, run seminars, and give speeches if I decide not finish my degree. This blog would also be a good marketing strategy for my speaking/coach services, possibly positioning me as a thought leader in the industry down the road. 

That's enough business talk. Right now, I'm finding that my family is quite toxic. I live with my grandma, two cousins, and uncle--and we're not the most functional family. I feel that they thrive off conflict, and sometimes i find myself getting wrapped up in it. When they're bored, they will look for ways to start bickering simply for the entertainment. They're addicted to phones, television/netflix/youtube, food, and are generally complacent in life. I don't really like talking like this because it sounds like I'm judging them, but I feel it's important to identify the situation as it is. When I began waking up at 4:30 AM, making my own food to eat healthier, and working on my life purpose--homeostasis hit us hard. I'm beginning to visit coffee shops and libraries to get a little more personal space in that rowdy house of mine, and may ultimately have to detach myself from them altogether. 

 

Regardless of that, I am still thankful for the fun times that we do have. Here are 5 things I'm grateful for about my family:

1. My cousin's youthfulness brightens my day sometimes.
2. All the cleaning they do around the house.
3. Company when I'm feeling lonely
4. Their ability to make me laugh
5. Calling me out when I'm in the wrong. 

 

Alright, there it is. Let's get this Sunday. Going to my first personal development workshop today! I'll talk about how it went in tomorrow's entry,

 

 

"I expand in abundance, success, and love every day as I inspire those around me to do the same."

 

[TeenVisionary98]

*Sigh...I burned out

Just 5 days short of completing my morning routine challenge and I fall through. I know I shouldn't go to bed so late since I wake up at 4:30, but I've managed in the past. In doing all my work, I've neglected exercise (besides the short jog I do when I first wake up) until I implemented this morning routine habit. I won't lie, I was pretty disappointed with myself this morning and ended up staying in bed until 2 PM. When I finally stopped feeling sorry for myself, I decided I needed a new strategy. I skimmed through "The Power of Full Engagement," and found that if I want to function with optimal energy levels, I need to balance the physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual aspects of my life. Since my physical well-being is the foundation of the four, it's no surprise why I am burning out. Here's what my revised morning routine will look like.

4:30 AM

Protein oatmeal with fruit and flax seed (10 minutes)

Check schedule and goals (10 minutes)

Meditate (10 minutes)

Imprint life purpose (10-15 minutes)

Journal (10-15 minutes)

5:30 AM

Strength and cardiovascular workout (1 hour to 1.5 hours)

7:00 to 7:30 ish

Eat post-workout meal and get to work

 

 

Also, I'll have to take intermittent breaks every 90-120 minutes throughout the day. I'm not exactly sure what I'll do, but a brief walk sounds good (roughly 15 minutes). 

 

On a more positive note, I went to my first seminar/meet-up yesterday! I was the youngest one there by at least half a decade. I offered to help the organizer out in setting up and through that I was able to share a bit about my vision for life. He contacted me this afternoon with a follow-up, ending with an offer to get together for a one-on-one coaching (with a sliding-scale fee). I'm a bit skeptical about this because he doesn't seem to have any coaching credentials, but has had 6 years of experience according to his Linkedin profile. Here's what I plan to ask him before moving forward: . 

• What is your coaching experience?
• What is your coach specific training?
• Do you hold an ICF Credential?
• What is your coaching specialty or client areas you most often work in?
• What specialized skills or experience do you bring to your coaching?
• What is your philosophy about coaching?
• What is your specific process for coaching?
• What are some coaching success stories?

I  also met this girl and was able to invite her to join the Toastmaster's club I go to since she talked about wanting to develop her communication skills , but I digress.

 

Alright, there's the journal entry of the day. Although I've fallen down, I choose to get back up. Tomorrow will be the start of a new 30-day challenge in implementing this newly developed morning routine. For today, I still plan on imprinting my life purpose, visualizing, and meditating. That's all for now! I'll end with 5 things I am grateful for:

1. Les Brown, who persuaded me to get out of bed.
2. This forum, where I can look back at my posts for inspiration.
3. The Power of Full Engagement by Jim Loehr and Tony Schwartz
4. Meetup.com
5. The fact that I got to live another day. 

 

"Every day I expand in abundance, success, and love as I inspire those around me to do the same."

Edited November 15, 2016 by TeenVisionary98

[TeenVisionary98]

Yup, didn't follow through on that last post. I'm very aware that "I'm going to sleep late because of finals" is a victim mindset when I know I could've begun studying earlier, but now I actually have to go to sleep late and am not willing to be sleep-deprived while I learn the material I need to learn. This will be a short post because I'm lowkey procrastinating by writing this. I was much more functional while having a morning routine and my only fault was not taking my studies as seriously. I'm so immersed in developing my skills and researching for my life purpose that math isn't focused on so much. I hate saying this, but my morning routine will probably not be started until Friday. Until then, I will continue to meditate and imprint my life purpose. 

 

As always, 5 things I'm grateful for are:

1. the clothes on my back
2. the laptop I'm currently using
3. a fridge full of food
4. Thriftbooks
5. Leo's book list

 

Alright, there it is. I'm scrambling to get my shit back together and can't wait for the quarter to end. 

 

"Everyday I expand in abundance, success, and love as I inspire those around me to do the same."

[TeenVisionary98]

So I fell off the horse, but I'm back on now. How many times does this have to happen before I truly commit to the goals I set for myself?

 

Lucky for me, I got a life coach so oI'm hoping we'll get a lot of work done. I've been in a huge state of confusion about my life purpose since reading Jed McKenna's, "Spiritual Enlightenment: the Damndest Thing" and watching the Peaceful Warrior.  One thing I took away is that I really am not working in the present, but for what it may bring me in the future. What does it take to reach a state of flow in the work we do? Also, what's the point of a life purpose if it's all a projection of our ego? I feel that a huge factor in why I'm so devoted to fulfilling my life purpose is because I seek importance for my life. Why is that? Isn't that just my ego at work? 

 

I don't even know why I read and study self-help books anymore. I'm getting this urge to get back into street photography, and I'm thinking I'm just going to go with the flow on this one and see where it takes me. Where do I stand on going through life coach training? Not entirely sure either. From what I remember, the reason I wanted to pursue life coaching was to help others develop a life where they might actualize their full potential which stemmed from my willing to do so. But if nothing is wrong with the world, why attempt to change it?

 

But then again, Gandhi and MLK attempted to change the status quo and the world benefited greatly. I feel a huge part of my confusion lies here. I may be thinking of my life purpose as a means to change the world rather than provide a service to it. Hmmm, interesting. I'll have to think about this as I go on throughout the day. 

 

5 things I am grateful for:

1. My life coach, Melissa
2. my mom's support
3. Lee, who really shook the belief system I had, making me begin to think for myself.
4. My grandma's cooking
5. the new campaign at work, helping to build support in opposition of Trump's environmental views and potential actions.

 

Alright, that's it for today. I will say that although I did not maintain my morning routine, I have been meditating pretty consistently. I'm excited to be going on a vipassana retreat next Wednesday, which upon my return I will hike up my meditation to one hour a day. Never thought I could commit to that, but after 10 or so hours of meditation a day for a little over a week I'm sure will help me ease into that transition!

 

 

" I expand in abundance, success, and love every day as I inspire those around me to do the same."