Understanding Psychology To Develop Good Communication Habit

[Shantanu]

Hi All,

I am 25. I was introvert for till about an year back. I been improving my communications skills with toastmasters  and by forcing myself be more social from about 2 years now.  Results are great. I got much better at communication.  Developed good confidence. I'll call it top to bottom approach. Learning by doing.

Then, with actualized.org I came to know about my psychology, my thinking patterns, why I feel the way I feel and why I do the things I do. Well, this helped me to get over my anxiety and gain a new level of confidence. Many internal conflicts were resolved and life appeared simple (not easy).  1 year of toastmasters could not bring that much profound result which I got with few moths by understanding psychology and acting to change it. I'll call it bottoms up approach. 

With Communication, we generally learn by doing, by actions.  Like we learn to listen actively, to nod a head, to use good body language, to use vocal variety, etc. All that is good and I am doing it. Though the pace of getting result is slow with this approach, I am fine with it.

At the same time I would like to work on communication with bottoms up approach. I want to know how to develop more awareness about communication, how to understand psychological need of it? Leo talked about 6 pillars of communication.  Assertiveness. Authenticity. Open mindedness. Empathy. Clarity. Listening. I am planning to do contemplation on each of this area. Will try to understand whats actually is going on.

I am looking for your inputs.  You might have done contemplation on these areas; followed the second approach. 

How should I go about with this approach? 

 

Edited February 17, 2016 by Shantanu