NewKidOnTheBlock

This guy's self awareness and honesty are on another level, given his self admitted narcisistic mental condition. As is his inteligence. I enjoy watching all of his videos

There's a lot of mental growth ahead of me needed, but hopefully with time, I'll mature more and more. I'm getting somewhere, albeit by the pace of a snail

Dissagree. Men want to invest into one woman of their choosing and provide for her, while being appreciated for their effort (which includes sex). Yeah you could have sex with any woman just based on instinct, but that's not very fullfilling at all, seeing as you don't actually care about them I'd let women speak on what they want, but for my part that's what I'd want from a woman, along with her aligning with most of my worldviews and values, sharing one or a couple of the same hobbies with me (but having some of her own, having her own life), her not being promiscious and having more or less clean past, etc.

Or perhaps I won't hide it and keep it as it is. Can't pretend uglyness, messiness and negative emotions aren't part of reality

I will find hobbies that I may enjoy, start doing them for a period of a few months and once I estimate that they are truly enjoyable, even in solitude, I shall hide this journal and make another one, for a purpose of transparance, coherence. And beaty as well, seeing as I made this journal kinda messy and ugly

I feel like... I should start developing some hobbies in my free time. Maybe then, after some time I wouldn't feel as lost as I've always felt/am always feeling. The problem with that, of course, is that I don't really enjoy anything. Or, to be precise I haven't discovered anything I would enjoy at all. And I feel like... all hobbies are really just a means to the end, like, people use them to get friends, to fuck and to get money. Or they're trying to/would like that to be the case. Always felt kind of fake to me, in that way. But it's also completely logical and understandable, ofc However, idk, like... I wish I had something I could do that would fill up my days. Maybe I would start enjoying anything if I'd just keep putting in some effort, or maybe not. Either way, I'm feeling pretty neutral and apathetic about everything and really, always have felt like that, about most things Maybe I'll try some programming again, but this time on my terms, without pressure. See if I like it. If for nothing else, at least I can make my computer and other devices run more efficiently. Don't have to have some ambitious goals in that regard, yet. Ofc I can start going to the gym again as well. And idk what else. I can't really think of anything I can do that's not done in solitude that I could enjoy as well (gym is in that category as well), except going to the clubs or some shit, but that's always been a challenging enviroment for me. Like, I don't really fuck with the music, dancing, drinking or any other shit people be doing there. So like, I don't know what the fuck to do there. It always feelt awkward I don't even think it is possible for me to have some grandiose life purpose, like this site keeps advertising and gloryfying, not gonna lie. Just seems unrealistic at this point. But just hobbies which I would enjoy doing in solitude, that could be adverised to other people if need be, that would also enrich my life. Make it not empty. But they gotta be advertisable, that's the thing, both in the social and job market sense Not gonna lie, the only reason why I'm still here is that I more or less agree with the spiritual shit, with some caveats ofc. As there is really no way to not agree with it

Will return once I have something positive to report about. I promise. Pinky swear

You're all so fucking smart aren't you. Like you lived a thousand lives or some shit. Gonna lecture me about something

Yes. Because if you have to think along these lines, you are already playing a rigged game. True confidence (and I mean true fucking confidence) is knowing you can raise your left hand up in the air anytime you want, BECAUSE you CAN in fact do that. With 100% probability. Real confidence is not "oh, there's a fairly high chance I might fail, but, you know, I'm going to be confident anyway" Confident about what? Is there enough positive reference experience? For some men there's not. So how the fuck can you just bluntly tell them "just be confident bro, just keep pushing through pain bro" such a self help BS. You want odds stacked in your favour, not against you. Then you can start gaining enough positive experience, and THEN you can be confident. So miss me with that "loser mentality" BS Nice work reciting yet another lines of memorized self help BS. Life doesn't always work like that. Not all challenges are surmountable or even worth being overcome. But whatever

Completely dissagree. The fact that your life is challenging doesn't mean shit, what's the added benefit? Bigger pain tolerance? LOL results is all that matters. You can try hard and have a challenging life and still keep being viewed as a loser by other people. What was all that "challenging life" good for then? For fuck all, that's what. In fact, it's best to make your life as easy as possible. Which does include some effort, but not dragging yourself throught cannals type of effort

Feels good to have a place of my own tho, not gonna lie. And it's genuinely mine, not some renting BS. I'm better off than most people in that regard. Just gonna get some things sorted out, like making sure I've secured this job, establish positive habits again like working out/going to the gym, then I'm going to finally start pulling women in there

I'm not changing the company any time soon tho, that's for sure. At least not for the duration of the Trump's presidency, cause he's a complete retard. Gotta always have something stable to survive economic turbulences (and God knows what) his actions will cause No more wild acrobatics or fiascos like from the 6 months back, now I gotta play it safe for real. Can't be retarded like that this time

You'd not like it. Let's leave it at that

Not thinking clearly right now. Probably will change my opinion. But man if I had the power. If I had the fuckin power

No, I'm not going there. Fuck them. Things and people should orbit around me, not me orbiting around them. I'll create my own thing for myself and make other people orbit around me. They can suck each other off for all I care. Fuck em I'm not curious about their shit anyway

I was trying to give her a huge benefit of the doubt while reading this, seeing as I'm ussually automatically internally biased towards anything a woman has to say about dating, but this is just a classic case of losing oneself, as a middle aged woman, in your own little self absorbed maze in which your fickle emotions are your God (while they're all just a result of some temporary hormonal fluctuations masking themselves as some deep understandings of human psyche or something), and you're putting the blame on men for not understanding these emotions (but nobody really can, not even yourself). And since she's almost middle aged already, this probably means she'll make herself be single forever, unlike if she was younger. Not because she wouldn't be able to find a man, but because she makes the whole process unnecessarilly complicated for herself. Dating shouldn't be complicated like this at all, it should be simple and smooth It does kinda come off as a dry egg syndrome

I need to drastically increase my job competence, that much is clear, both actual and perceived one. Just not sure which avenue to go towards anymore, but I feel like it's gotta be something both technical and manual. I feel like that way I'll have the most well paid options + not being replaceable by A.I. Plus not enough of this social media ass, braindead ass generation will want to do it or be able to do it, they're all about that software but no hardware knowledge, so there's always going to be demand after these people. Not at all limited to computers But one lesson I learned after my last job is that the best thing is to just play it like you only want to progress the way they need you to, not the way you actually want to. Keep your real goals to yourself, and talk to them like you would talk to NPCs, don't reveal too much about yourself or what you think. Just play it cool and professional the entire time

Alright, seems like I don't have to worry about this anymore. Just going to wait a little while before "celebrating", since it is not yet trully cemented agreement, but a verbal one nontheless, should be enough. This is the kind of joy that would surely seem of little importance to many people, but is a big deal for me since it lifted big boulder off of my shoulders, now I got some space to breathe and manouver and prepare for the future better

Why did he need a friend to manage his crypto account, If he had just bought some Bitcoin and Ethereum and let it sit there, he could have just done that himself LOL. But whatever, dubious business practices attracting other dubious business practices is not surprising to me in the slightest

Bro Im the janitor/security of this fuckin place I swear the God LMAO always making the trash take itself out. Incredible But whatever. If they won't accept me on this current position then they are beyond retarded. And they should go fuck themselves. Like. That role fits me perfectly. Of course it's still a big possibility cause ppl are retarded. I'll go for whatever if that happens, would not care anymore.

It is a real shame that bullet missed

Theres some crazy MFs on this forum fr fr, Im outta this bitch fr fr ngl on my momma

See you on the news, buddy

401k is literaly the same as investing. LOL idk why you keep bringing this up. Literaly makes no difference other than maybe company would be willing to match your contribution to your 401k. And not all companies are willing to offer this, and only big companies and megacorporations or maybe state institutions are able to afford it in the first place. It's complete BS. Just invest on your own, it's much more flexible and your brain matter will increase by thinking a bit Pensions? Are you working in a state institution for several decades, then maybe you'll get one but it's value halved severely by inflation. Other than that, there are no pensions anymore. Social security? LOL it's a ponzi scheme dude. It's existence and stability depends on the young generation paying the social security tax which then directly feeds the old retirees. You can't depend on that with this birth rate, this disguistingly exploitative system, and the kind of prices we have while wages keep being stagnant. Are you actually a troll? Or a boomer? Or both? Yes we need collective retirement strategies, but NOT like those things you mentioned. It has to be something different, but that has to be accomplished by political and social changes, not individual changes Ok? I said the same thing. But most people won't be able to. Prove me wrong. LEL Your ideas about increasing income is the real fantasy. It's what all this retarded hustle culture fantasy and American dream is based on. And majority of self improooovement advice In reality, both increasing your income and investing is more dependent on the actions and mood of other people, than your actions. To think otherwise is delusional. It is a bad investment that should not exist. Just because there's a chance that your future wage/income will be significantly higher after passing college and getting a degree, and that you'll be able to handily pay off student loan as a result, is not a justification for the existence of these loans. They should not be getting a single penny and instead should be state funded completely

Radioactive mutant😄