Crazy_ball

Right. This is a 'man bad, woman good' narrative that your mother conditioned you with because you didn't have a father. But, here are some hard questions we can't not look at. First of all, why did our 'poor, abused mother' end up in a bad marriage to begin with? Secondly, why did she have a child in this bad marriage? And thirdly, why didn't she remarry? The answer to the first question is - an overall negative outlook towards men would lead to one making needless compromises with the wrong individual. The answer to the second question is the thought-process 'just have a child first, then we don't need a husband', typical feminism. And the third one is a little more understandable, because it is hard to find someone as a single mother. This idea that 'independence is better than doing the hard work to find a good man' comes from feminism. When your father abandons you, he's as good as dead to you. So, the natural question is - which of your 'good people' is responsible for this situation? Did they make some mistakes? Did they have negative beliefs that led to this? Sure, it's wrong to abandon your child, but this doesn't make these mistakes I'm talking about any less serious.

Here. You don't know about the issue of children growing up without a father because their mother hates men, or the issue of false accusations.

@Natasha Tori Maru That's life as a man. You get asked 'who hurt you' by feminists all the time, nobody bats an eye. The one time you ask it to a feminist, you're 'trolling'. Really unfair life. But, such is the hypocrisy of the 'woke' humans. All by design.

Why not? Is it that bad?

No, I'm telling @Lila9 that the comment she replied to was directed to you, not her. And that my question to her is who hurt her.

@Lila9 That was directed towards @Ulax, not you. Answer me if you have the courage (and really have a self-righteous reason to be saying what you're saying) - Who hurt you?

This is not an accident. This is by design. They are unapologetic in their hatred towards men, as @Lila9 explained so well. There is no doubt that there is hatred. Our job is to deal with the hurt underneath the hatred. It's actually a nice response.

Who hurt you?

There is a lot of talk about how 'men chase power to satisfy their egos'. There is little to no credit given for the point of doing so. It's to provide and protect for the family. But, feminism sees the man only as an oppressor, whose ultimate aim is to oppress women. You talk about the distinction between the 'patriarchy' and 'men'. The system of rules that men consider 'fair' are agreed upon by a sizeable majority of men. There is a mutual respect between men even if on an unequal playing-field, just in principle. So, when they talk about 'patriarchy', this does refer to men. Look, if you have a family, your primary commitment is to the family. And, feminism has a fundamental issue with this. Ever since Gloria Steinem wrote her book denouncing the life of a mother. You can't ignore these realities. I have the perfect question to ask them related to this. 'Who hurt you?'!

And what about the man? Where's his family-time? Or, is he supposed to just slave away at work and come to an empty home with a crying child? When does he get to see his wife? They will say positive things about individual men, who play to their tune. But, 'men' as a whole? Very rarely, almost never. 'A woman can do everything a man can do and more', is what I've heard more often.

Here comes the psycho-analysis. Here's your homework-assignment - read what I've said about the ideology. It says 'men are the oppressors'. What part of that sounds loving towards men? Read it again and again until you get it. Once you get it, tell me - what part of this is 'healthy'?

Yeah, right. Their 'marriages' are the so-called 'power-couple' thing, right, where both are out doing their own thing and the children go to daycare? Right, that works. I have never once heard a feminist say a positive thing about men. You can't be a feminist and believe that men are not your oppressors, that there are good men out there.

@something_else When you have a mother who hates men and doesn't have a very positive view of men to begin with, she's going to subconsciously make compromises in a marriage that shouldn't be made to begin with. Then, the relationship will go downhill and eventually fall apart. This will reinforce the feminist ideology and that's what'll lead to the decision to stay a single mother, as opposed to remarrying. The result? The child doesn't get to see a working relationship at home.

@something_else Being raised by a single mother because she thought she could be 'strong and independent', not growing up with two parents as a result of this. Happy, or you want more sob-story?

Now, here's my piece on the ill-health of feminism. The ideology goes 'we (women) are separate from them (men), and we're the victims, they're the oppressors'. It's a fundamentally angry, bitter, separation-based ideology. It's anti-spiritual.

@something_else You're trying to psycho-analyze me because you think there's something fundamentally healthy about feminism, that 'oh, it's about women's rights, and that's it'. So, when I come along and say that feminism is a bunch of silencing-tactics (which it is), you're thinking that I'm the unhealthy one. My point is that as these esteemed female authors are saying, feminism is fundamentally unhealthy. So, we should psycho-analyze the feminists!

Look, don't listen to me. Listen to the women whose podcasts I've shared. Feminism has failed them. If you disagree with them, you're a misogynist. Case closed!

The word 'misogynist' truly does work better than the word 'misandrist' to silence someone. Women have to be our strongest allies in battling feminism.

How misogynistic of you, to discredit what women are saying about feminism!

I think I now have the answer to this question. When someone goes 'patriarchy rawr!' or 'men are the single biggest threat to women Reee!!' or 'I don't need a man rawwrrr!!' or 'Toxic masculinity Reeee!!', here's what you do. You ask them, in a condescending tone 'Aww. Who hurt you?' and then watch them reveal how they generalized an isolated incident to all men. I think this should do it.

Who hurt you?

Nice try. If you have a point to make, just make it.

Let's start with you. Who hurt you? What is it that you're projecting on a random stranger on the internet about their 'entire personality' for '10 years'?!

@LordFall I think the point being made here is that there is a strong anti-male sentiment to feminism and that this is not a recent thing. They have to be dealt with accordingly.

@Natasha Tori Maru After all the years of seeing this unfold, here's what I think about this. The ideology is just empty words (except for those who are actually doing something for women on the political front, which is a vanishingly small minority) This idea of the 'toxic manifestations' is also a part of the ideology. For the most part, awareness of the toxic manifestations doesn't do much to prevent damage. All it does is it serves as an intellectual defense-mechanism to defend oneself against accusations of being toxic and to escape the task of holding accountable those who are being toxic. What's being said here is more serious. What's being talked about here is the value-system of those who call themselves feminist. You have to understand that this is one of those ideologies that shapes people's entire personalities, it comes to change everything about who someone is. This value-system is the real problem. So, here's the value-system: Independence, leading to an unconsciousness around human interdependence and an unwillingness to depend on anyone, Female tribalism, which leads to the avoidance of men and seeing men as the 'toxic other'. Talk about how 'men are dumb, men are dogs' falls into this Trying to be the authority on 'health' and 'healthy society' - this one is especially pernicious. When they talk about what's 'healthy' and what's 'toxic', watch out for bias. This gives them a sense of moral superiority and self-righteousness which will justify any actual toxicity from them. Those feminists who are the gatekeepers of 'health' will call you misogynistic for uttering the words 'toxic feminism'. Social control - the whole talk about 'equality' and 'when you're used to privilege, equality feels like oppression' is a bid for social power and social control. They tend to be naive about the right way to use the social power and are systemically unaware, which is why blanket-statements about 'the patriarchy' are very popular. Talk about how 'war would end if women ran the world' is also popular, and it's complete and total BS. Emotional validation - they want emotional validation for themselves. It's not smart to expect emotional consciousness from people who are so mired in a battle-mindset, but the problem is they think they're emotionally conscious. Which they're not. At all. As you correctly pointed out, male anger does get invalidated. It's worse - men have only two emotions according to them - lust and anger. It also leads to a glorification of man-hate, which is actively denied. Leo here will directly come and deny this! Superiority. Moral and intellectual superiority over men. This leads to them setting impossibly high standards for men on the dating-front, because they think they can meet their own standards! Also, if you will not admit to being inferior to a man on any front, he will have no role in your life. Which is why all of your relationships will fizzle out. This value-system is the root-cause of all of the toxicity. And this is the thing that needs to be looked at. Will this value-system lead to a happy life?! This article is the first real data-point that I can put across to make the case that it may not lead to a happy life. If not for this data-point, feminists would say 'we're perfectly happy with our lives, you worry about yours'.