Howtolive

I get where you are pointing at overall. If I look deeply in myself I dont respect getting sex without needing to show that I would take care of her, admire her for her etc... So its not like I expect sex without effort, ist quite the opposite. And the topic regarding honesty. My point is probably that it feels wrong to me. To let someone else enter your body, especially by someone that get turned on by "using" and objectifying without them caring for the person at all. Thats a huge difference to selling a product.

I dont see how that connects to my statement ?

Very nice insights, now we talking haha. I have made a lot of these experiences myself and talked about them to other men. So we are on the same page. I would just ask you to go one step deeper. Maybe you had the experience that doing that with a gir that is particularly "sluttly" and promiscuous is sometimes feeling even better. It's like when you use tinder and you are looking for a hookup. You directly search for the girls who are looking for "nothing serious". And with the experience I had it was an extra turn on, to know that she is doing the naughty stuff with me, because she is already in that category in my head. Because I would not take a girl as a girlfriend that openly on tinder says: just here to get fu*ed. So to be precise: The turn on happens because she lets me do all that stuff WITHOUT me having to invest anything more then that. No relationship, no emotional support, no me proving that it's good for her to surrender her body to me. It feels very good because to us men its like a "glitch" in the matrix. But on the other hand, even though I want the easy excess to sex, It feels like the woman is doing a move that is not really in her best interest. She is getting projected as a sexual object without it being integrated into something higher. It's not coming from church for me. Its feels like a natural instinct that does not understand why woman would give themselves to lusting men, how few them in a low light (thats basically what male sexuality does when getting free excess). I will text you a dm

I See where you are pointing at. And I thought so, too for a longer time. There is just something about male sexuality which is very destructive I think. If I look deeply in my self it turns me on to "use" a girl and when that usage marks her or degrades her in a way. Thats purly instinctual though. I know it's very hard to talk about, but to me it feels like devaluing a woman when this instinct is not properly integrated into loving relationship. Do you know what I am talking about or is it to far off or only my personal projection? I also think because I am aware of this mechanisim in myself, it always feels a bit sad if woman just open up for casual fun to guys. Not knowing what going on in the guys head.

I agree on a personal level. Things automatically start shifting in the direction you mention. Still there is the ethical / meta view trying to understand causal sex and if I want to participate in it and if it is generally useful for others to participate in it. So far my view is: Its not useful for both genders. It seems like you got a little stuck on me comparing men and woman. for the sake of my argument it does matter.

I think if a man is really honest most woman wouldn't have casual sex with him. Thats why I belive its almost always based on a lie

and a nother question: would a woman really sleep with a man if she knew that : "- he does not care about me, does not find me attractive for a relationship, I am just the one female that gives him excess, thats why he is interested" A lot of woman told me that they can start something casual with a guy and later they will see if it fits for a relationship. But mostly the man knows already in the beginning that a relationship will never happen. One reason is because she is not exclusive already. So maybe woman do sleep fast with men, but in their mind are still open for a possible relationship, while this is often not happening from the mens side.

Very interesting what you say about dropping the concepts and still coming to the same conclusion... I get your point with black and white thinking about men and woman... for me personally I have a higher libido, I see a nice woman on the street and my brain tells me to get her laid. I dont know if it is that strong in woman. A man has close to zero risk engaging in sex a woman does. So isn't there a natural mechanisim in woman which should be there to ensure here that here sexual encounter is not to costly for here?

thanks for your view! So far my experience was that it's harder for females to just purly for sex. A man his this hunter mode, he is purly driven by instinct and visuals. He can leave directly after the sex without caring. I have never heard or seen this in woman. I often also hear the term that woman need to trust the man and feel secure to let go and enjoy sex, how is that working when the man really doesnt give a "shit"? But maybe my perception is wrong here and woman are more raw then I might belive.

Hey guys, First of all I am very grateful for all Leo has done. It has helped me immense. I really like that he maps „the way“ so smooth. There is just something that feels a little off when I sometimes see comments here in the forum. And probably also sometimes an undertone in his videos. For a very wise person, I would start seeing them to become less opinionated. Maybe more opinionated when it comes to morales etc. To me it seems like there are a lot of topics where we can’t have a 100% certainty, and that’s okey. But I find Leo to be very strong sided in a lot of these topics were we just don’t know or are still learning. some examples: -Leo’s view on IQ and IQ tests and its possible relevance -no fap -whole covid vaccination process -His general vibes expecially with the „epistemology“ It seems like intelligence is a very detrimental factor to a persons life especially when it’s more in the lower side. For Leo IQ test are just a bunch of crap. He seems to redeculize the idea of no fap and does not go really deep in explanation. Just saying you nbeed to control it like any other drug. With the whole covid vaccine debate he refers to the study that points out that it’s safer to be vaxxed and catch it then the other way around. That’s it, topic closed.Even if that’s true, there is no talk about how immoral group pressure was strategically used. How it would persevere spreading but later we know it did not etc etc. It surprises me to see that he does not look at some topics from different perspectives, instead he starts to get rather absolut. To me that doesn’t seem right for a rather wise person to act like. I know Leo is also just a human, too. interested in your views on this.

no.

With this view being opinionated cant be criticised.

Don't get it.

It’s a lot of speculation of course. But I agree that the tone is offputing at times. Something just is a bit off but it’s hard to really outbid into words sometimes.

The way you frame it in this text, I would say we are even on the same page. Nothing can said against it, it is bullet proof logic in its frame. the premises is just something I would say is sometimes maybe to absolut. the Covid vaccine safed millions of lives. Does it mean it’s the best to take for every age group? What about long term affects? What about using „lies“ to push them into the masses? When does a lie justify the the result, etc etc. As long as you are still open to have a fair look on these aspects as well, I can’t say anything. From what I have seen here in the forum regarding that topic and the others I have mentioned. I have not seen that. Of course I don’t know you, so I can’t tell how nuonced you really are. Since you are very strong intellectually it’s also one of the more common traps for these archetypes, to fall into. Thanks for the exchange

Thanks for answering. I was actually thinking about that, too. And I would say that it’s absolutely correct to do it in certain topics. Where I sense something „off“ is when you start to use the same authority in topics that are just very big in facets. Like politics for example. If somebody claims he know what to do and how to rule and bla bla bla. Its more real that there are so many factors and things we don’t know and can’t control, so that we can only do our best but nobody can claim to „know it all“. That’s the vibe I get from you in certain topics.

Hey guys, I notice more and more that I am cut off from my own power in a way. Fear of maybe being to much, to dominant is holding me back which leads to the opposite, feeling less confident and feeling like I see my self as less. The Problem I have: I have a big energy inside me that wants to be the hero, wants to dominate, wants to win, wants to push etc. Its not there cause of trauma or something it feels more like a natural instinct I have. But I am also very reflective, wanting to act from values, wanting to meet people at a human level and doing something thats meaningful to me. I often hear that there is a more mature from of this masculine energy, but I can't really believe that. It seems like lots of men have these visions of being the hero, lots just have them buried and others are not really 100% honest with themselves. It annoys me because I dont know how to use this energy inside of me really, its always getting blocked off because I dont want to act from ego so much etc.. Maybe some of the guys here can help me ?

wow very very insightful. It might be the answer I have been looking for ! I was afraid I might lose something when not listening to the ego/masculine drive but now I see how it can be used. I had a similar experience with saying my truth. Usually anger comes up and tells me my truth. But I do not need to communicate it in an angry way. So the vision ( anger shouts) and the action where not the same but afterwards I still feel pretty aligned... Maybe thats the same thing you are pointing at

Very helpful!! Thank you very much. So we keep the visions going in our heads but use the same energy not exactly for what the visions wants ( the ego wants to be seen and get the attention of course etc ) but more to build stuff ?

Yeah but gaining self worth from the outside doesn't sound like the best idea, like a common trap

For me that would mean that I would try to climbe the social letter, be more dominant, want attention form the outside, seen as the cool guy, get the nice car , get the attractive woman,. And I know that this is not only what I want since I am also looking for meaning and purpose. But Then it feels like these two energys contradict each other

Don't really get what you are trying to say here

Hello, As I can see so far there are basically three things that helps with stuck emotions: 1) working with belives and understanding what's going on -> Results in a feeling of freedom from old belive (cognitive therapy with psychologist) 2) Radically leaving ones comfort zone and facing scary situations in life -> resulting in freedom because more trust and courage 3) Emotional releases -> resulting in an overwhelming energetic feeling which frees one from his stuck emotions Does anybody know when which strategy is the best and for what scenario? I See a lot of new age "spiritual men" getting stuck in introspection searching for triggers, getting more and more into a feminine frame, instead of actually getting strong and feeling capable in life. Being on his own mission etc. Maybe some of the other men have some experiences. So far opening up to all this emotional work feels unnatural to me. Thanks !

Hello, I have problems with a chronic condition. By trying to heal it I eventually stumbled upon spirituality and emotional healing. At first it was just more mainstream new age spirituality. Over time I got more and more knowledge identified some traps in spirituality and really understood that non duality is portably the hardest thing a person can pursue. I also realised that healing my "shadow" or emotional body is key to getting my health back. So for now I just try to do the emotional work. In that work there is of course already a lot of letting go. For myself I identified different categories. Personal development, emotional healing, spirituality (non duality), spirituality (being connected as an ego to a higher purpose etc), developing values, morals and ethics and lastly developing a life purpose. I now want to have more clarity on what I am actually doing right now? It feels like by working with my emotions more and getting more distance to for example to fear, I already went through some kind of awakening and it still continues. Is the emotional healing and personality development needed to actually go to higher levels ( enlightenment) ? Is what I am doing right now cleaning my ego from all the "bad" stuff and I create a healthy ego? I am in my mid 20s right now and heared opposite views on the context of enlithenmnet from @Leo Gura. In his FAQ2 he said that pursuing enlithnemnet early is the right way because it has immense benefits. In his video "250 Traps" he said he whished to not go so early in spirituality. He says going this path at the end of ones life is more natural. So I am a bit confused right now. It seems like a lot of people that healed that way made tremendous jumps regarding their spiritual progress. It seems like evolving spiritually is key to really letting go of one emotional baggage. On the other side I am thinking if aiming at getting a healthy ego first is the "better" goal for now. I had one LSD experience paired with reading hardcore non duality book right after. That crushed my worldview big time. It still has me a bit destabilised. I can see how much things can come up when you really go more and more meta. Is the some kind of order or roadmap for people in their mid to end 20s to how to navigate all these different topics? Thanks a lot !!

I mean I identify as a man and I see that as having a healthy ego foe example. Maybe letting bo and developing both is needed ?