From 20 - 25 years old I was undiagnosed Bipolar 1. I was abusing weed and amphetamines heavily, and "with Psychotic Symptoms" was added to my diagnosis. I would talk to myself, I felt as if the Universe were talking to me through synchronicity, and I was having persecutory delusions. I got well, medicated, and for the next 5 to 8 years I was "well."
When I turned 33 I got accepted into a graduate program, had an "epiphany" and would be floridly delusion for the next three years, all the way until roughly 3 months ago. Same symptoms, heavy synchronicity, I felt search and Spotify algorithms were speaking to me, and I felt as if I had fallen in love. The entire duration I was still (heavily) medicated but felt as if everyone and everything could hear me talking to myself. Three years I was roaming aimlessly, living at home with my parents under the guise of being episodic. I learned not to care what people thought of me, I learned to shrug off the little things, and overall I feel like I became a much healthier person after having snapped out of the delusional state 3 months ago.
Has anyone dealt with something like this?
