Xonas Pitfall

@Thought Art Satisfying for what, though? It makes total sense that you're not experiencing infinity - you're a limited being. You can't experience the infinite if you're finite. That’s just basic logic. If I gave you a calculator that only does math up to 10, it’d be dumb to say, “Well, I'm only seeing results up to 10... where’s the rest of the numbers?” You’re using a limited tool, so of course you’re getting limited output. Same thing here. You can experience infinity - but only through mediums that allow for it. Your body isn’t one of them. Your body is super constrained - it can’t fly, it can’t run faster than Usain Bolt, etc. It’s built with limits. But your mind? That’s different. The mind is fluid, abstract, weird - way more flexible. It can touch infinity in ways the body never could. You could imagine God as a kind of mind without a body - pure infinite awareness. No constraints. No filter. Just being, totally open. That’s what allows for infinity to be experienced in full. And noted - I’ll switch up my signature, hehe!

@Thought Art The key is realizing that suffering, as we experience it, is deeply tied to our limited human perspective. When someone we love dies, it feels tragic. But that sense of tragedy comes from attachment, from identifying with a specific, localized viewpoint. From a more objective or universal perspective, it just means old genetics phasing out, and new, younger, stronger ones emerging. Nature is evolving. It’s a beautiful process. Something to be celebrated. Take a museum as an analogy. When a painting is removed, no one calls it a tragedy - because we know it means new art is coming. If you were especially attached to one particular piece, you might feel its absence as a loss. But everyone else might welcome the change, especially if they connect with the new works in deeper ways. That doesn’t make it bad - it just means your view is personal, partial. It’s the same with nature. Imagine a Lion and a zebra both surviving, in their own way: "God, help me eat!" "God, let me escape!" Whose prayer does God answer? Who deserves to live? This dilemma only exists if you assume there should be a side to take. Each creature is doing what it evolved to do. Their clash isn't a flaw in the system - it's the system itself. Suffering exists because competing wills exist. As long as beings care about their continuation, their safety, comfort, offspring, and territory, there will be conflict. Not because something went wrong, but because that’s how life works. So, from our narrow view, we call it “suffering.” But from the universal perspective - the view of the system as a whole - it is not seen as a tragedy, but as evolution, transformation, self-understanding.

To clarify the wording, it's not that God needs to do anything. It's more accurate to say that it simply is as it is. There’s no choice involved, no desire or preference. God is all, everything, infinity - so by definition, everything must exist. It's a tautology. A = A. If A is all, everything, infinity, then A must be all, everything, infinity. Nothing is excluded. That's what makes it total. If there were any bias in that creation - any limitation or exclusion - then it wouldn’t be infinite. It wouldn't be all. If God created a universe with everything except suffering, then God would be everything minus suffering - and that’s not totality, that’s a constraint. That’s a limitation. And if God is limited, then by definition, God is not God - not the infinite, not the total. It helps to imagine this as a random set. Let’s say you want to create a set that is truly infinite. Not just very large - actually infinite. If it’s truly infinite, then it must contain everything you throw at it. Will it contain 1? Yes. Will it include a googol? Yes. Graham’s number? Yes. Any number you can possibly imagine? Yes. Why? Because if it left anything out, it wouldn’t be infinite. It would be almost infinite, but not total. So when you ask - Why the Horror? You are basically asking - “but why must this infinite set include 17? or 21? or 89?” - the answer is simple: because if it didn’t, it wouldn’t be infinite. The nature of infinity is that it must include all. It exists by necessity. Same with God. If God is all, everything, infinite, then all things must be present. Not because God “wants” them, but because God is. There is no creation with bias. No cherry-picking. No exclusions. The horror and the beauty are there because they must be - because they are part of everything that is. I hope this makes sense!

❤️ Honestly, it might just be that you don’t have people around you right now with whom you feel safe fully expressing yourself. If you’re really deep into this kind of path - one that involves a lot of self-exploration and introspection - it is a very specific lens through which to see the world. And yeah, it can be a bit addictive, in a good way, because you’re uncovering so much about yourself. Is there anything you want to be doing right now? If you're currently drawn to things like ego dissolution, meditation, psychedelics, and contemplation, then maybe that’s just what you need right now. You don’t need to force yourself to be social if this is your “asocial” chapter. It’s okay to have seasons like that. Some questions to sit with: What would I like my day-to-day life to actually look like? Do I like the people I'm around? What kind of person would I even enjoy talking to or being in a relationship with? Is there a kind of work or self-expression I’m into - like making content, writing, even just sharing on this forum? (You seem fairly active here, so maybe that is something you enjoy.) TLDR: It’s possible there’s nothing wrong with you - you’ve just shifted the way you see the world, and now your reality needs to catch up. That includes your habits, your environment, and the people around you.❤️ Good luck! Plus, from the little I’ve read of your posts, you come across as thoughtful, intelligent, and grounded. I don’t see any reason why you’d struggle to get things going if that’s what you actually wanted to do. My guess is that it’s more about what I mentioned earlier, rather than you being flawed or “messing with your ego” or anything like that. And my bad if someone already brought this up - I didn’t read the whole thread.

It depends semantically on how we define "experience." Definition: experience /ɪkˈspɪərɪəns, ɛkˈspɪərɪəns/ Noun Practical contact with and observation of facts or events. "He had learned his lesson by painful experience." Similar: involvement in, participation in, contact with, acquaintance with, exposure to, observation of, awareness of, familiarity with, conversance with, understanding of, impression of, insight into If experience is not equal to being, then we enter the duality framework: The experiencer and the observed - or the experience itself. The Self is observing, and the "other" is being observed or experienced. This can be interpreted in two ways: The Self experiencing itself as a fragment (i.e., God fragmenting itself to become limited so it can experience itself from the point of view of the fragment), Or, the object/subject/limited fragment experiencing the world through its subjective lens. (This would be the same as a human experiencing breathing, love, the cold sensation, the taste of a strawberry, etc.) Both definitions essentially point to the same; the difference lies in perspective. One includes the expanded viewpoint of God or pure being, while the other reflects a more limited, "human" interpretation of experience. Nonetheless, it simply means to allow “the other” into your own consciousness, and the amount of consciousness you direct onto the other is the depth of your experience or understanding of the observed. Consequently, once your consciousness deepens and expands enough, the other ceases to exist - and there is no longer an "experiencer and experience" - but just pure being, or merging with the other/experience. (Kind of like when people on Salvia report becoming the doorknob or a juice box - their depth of consciousness and the "volume" they can hold in their perception expanded so much, they stopped experiencing the inanimate object and became it for eternity.) This also explains why more limited, constrained egos or human minds might not be able to understand the perspective of another human different from them, because the depth of consciousness or understanding they choose to (or can) bring in is limited. (For example, a person may not be able to understand what it’s like to have gender dysphoria, or to be born in a different culture, religion, etc.) Hence, you'd say: Their limited point of view lacks the capacity or willingness to expand consciousness onto another. For example, a religious person may not want to experience what it's like to belong to another religion. As a result, their understanding of the other person remains shallow - they see the other religion as meaningless, confusing, separate, or even wrong. The more you’re willing to experience, the more you’re able to understand. And the more complexity, variables, and nuance you can take in, the more consciousness you're deploying - deepening the quality/depth of your experience. From experience comes understanding, and from deeper understanding comes deeper experience. They influence and reinforce one another. So the progression goes: → Unconsciousness (The subject is not perceiving the object) → Experience (The subject is experiencing the object, but it is separate from it, and perceived through a limited lens of the subject) → Total Being or Union (The subject merges with the object and fully becomes or embodies it) Now, if you want to redefine experience semantically to include “experiencing what it’s like to be one with another,” you could - but then the original definition of experience, which requires both an experiencer and an observed object, would no longer apply. In the pure state of being, there is no “other” to be observed. Definitions: Experience is to allow “the other” into your consciousness. Experience is the act of allowing 'the other' to enter and be held within your consciousness. Experience is the process by which consciousness makes contact with phenomena - internal or external - allowing them to be known, felt, or absorbed. To experience is to open awareness to the presence of anything - the self, the other, or the space between.

That’s really interesting! I’m actually a bit surprised to see the archetypal Masculine linked to air and fire, since I’ve usually heard masculinity described in more stereotypically "hard" terms - grounded, pragmatic, reality-focused, logical, structured. Meanwhile, the Feminine is often framed as "soft," emotional, fluid, intuitive, and abstract-transcendent. This split shows up in how society categorizes fields, too: "hard sciences" like physics and engineering are seen as masculine, while "soft sciences" like psychology or social work are viewed as feminine. Even visually, masculine design tends to favor sharp lines and angles, while feminine design leans toward curves and soft shapes - it reminds me of the Bouba/Kiki effect: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bouba/kiki_effect Also, why people tend to joke or meme about women being into things like astrology, numerology, the law of attraction, spirituality, or personality types. That's why it’s kind of funny to hear spirituality linked to the Masculine, since it’s often "stereotyped as a Feminine domain" - all about emotion, intuition, abstract ideas, nonlinear thinking, and connection. A lot of guys, at least in mainstream culture, tend to pride themselves on being logical, step-by-step thinkers, rooted in what’s “real.” Plus, many spiritual practices focus on ego death and surrender, which are often culturally coded as feminine values. On the other hand, masculine traits are often associated with more ego-driven concepts like competition, hierarchy, and individualism. Not to mention, one of the core aspects of God-realization is Love / Self-Love / Surrender / Submission / Absolute Beauty, and I’d honestly be shocked if anyone claimed those concepts sound stereotypically masculine! Of course, real spirituality is about balance - it takes emotional intelligence and intuition alongside critical thinking and philosophical deconstruction. Concepts like truth, reality, ownership, omnipotence, and power are also deeply tied to God-realization, and stereotypically, those are seen as more masculine traits. You need both. If you haven’t integrated both aspects, then you're not fully realized yet. And if you continue to see one side as lesser or incomprehensible compared to the other, you're still missing key elements of reality/infinity itself. What’s unfortunate is how “feminine” is often treated as a synonym for "stupid" or “irrational,” rather than just a different and equally valuable mode of thought. That’s why I’m not a big fan of these kinds of comparisons. They often feel like they distract from actual realization and can limit growth for both genders. And just to clarify - I’m not saying you implied that at all! Your original comment just sparked this train of thought for me. If you strongly identify with the ego or sense of self, you're more likely to resonate with ideas like self-sufficiency, solipsism, the Lonely God-Head - the all-powerful, all-mighty, ever-present, omnipotent. But you may struggle with ego death, with seeing yourself in others, with recognizing all as love-interconnected, chaotic, beautiful, without needing structure or definition. On the other hand, if you resist or struggle with the ego/self, you'll likely find it easier to accept those interconnected, fluid, and love-centered perspectives, but may have difficulty embracing the power, sovereignty, and totality of the self. That’s why deconstructing the masculine and feminine dichotomies is essential if you're seeking true integration - without it, you're only ever seeing part of the whole.

Beautiful video - the emotion and dramatic touches really added a lot They gave the whole episode a deeper, more immersive feel. I'd definitely encourage experimenting with that more if it feels authentic and enjoyable for you!

It depends on your current situation - if you urgently need the income, it might be a good idea to take the offer, build up your experience for your resume, and continue looking for better opportunities in the meantime. If you have the flexibility to job hunt a bit longer, it’s definitely worth exploring roles you’re more passionate about or would genuinely enjoy. Also, optimizing your LinkedIn profile, sending out more applications, or even doing some direct outreach via email can open up more doors Best of luck!

Definitely - I’m not on the forum that often, but I wouldn’t be surprised if there’s a lot of meaningless debating going on, often just to defend someone’s ego or fixed beliefs rather than to genuinely help or bring clarity to others. I was mainly pointing it out so you don’t fall into the common trap of thinking, “Oh, if someone’s enlightened, they couldn’t possibly care about any ‘earthly’ matters!” That’s just not true. People can absolutely choose to engage in whatever feels authentic or brings them the most joy. Spirituality and enlightenment aren’t about detaching from life, but rather about freeing yourself from the ego-driven “copium” that blocks your real self-expression. From what you’ve said, it sounds like you already value authenticity and aspire to live that way - so yes, I think we’re totally on the same page. Yay!

Thank you! I came to the same conclusions myself, but I hadn’t heard much about the "cyclical nature" aspect before, so I really appreciated that addition. I also like to think of it as the “ultimate” or “fundamental pattern.” For example, when we call something “funny,” there’s always an element of surprise or a punchline - a basic structure that repeats, even though the content varies infinitely. Similarly, when we call something “useful,” there’s often a structure: a problem appears -> something resolves it -> and thus it’s deemed useful. The "pattern" or its "properties" are constant, but the ways it shows up are endless. In the same way, God/Truth/Reality/Consciousness seems to follow a fundamental cycle: “I am infinite -> but am I finite? I must be -> so I create the finite -> the finite "feels" separate from me -> it strives for union -> it is whole -> I become infinite again.” That cycle endlessly expresses itself in infinite variations of separation and reunion. From within time, we perceive it as progress or evolution, but from the perspective of the infinite, it simply always is.

Not fully! Once you are "awakened", you can take any path you want. You might start appreciating the world more deeply, continue doing what you were already doing but with greater awareness, or use that understanding to help others and improve humanity. It's not petty - if everything is ultimately meaningless, then you're free to do whatever brings you the most joy, passion, and fulfillment. And even if you reach a state of enlightenment, that doesn't free you from financial or practical human needs. A lot of people, wanting to stay close to the truth they’ve realized, choose to build a life around it. Not because they’re deluding themselves, but because it genuinely feels like the best path - one that aligns both with their understanding and their basic human needs. TLDR: Wanting to debate and improve human thought can be a completely valid and authentic desire.

Do you mind expanding on this? I understand the logic, but I'd love to hear you explain it more clearly - it sounds interesting! This kind of description actually made me think of a cell and how it infinitely multiplies into smaller versions of itself. I love it - one big cell branching into infinite smaller cells, each one a reflection of the whole, like endless layers of the same infinity.

It’s an ambiguous thing, but you can definitely feel it - especially when you're shifting from one state to another. Like waking up from unconsciousness into consciousness, going from being very alert to drowsy and tired, or from being hyper-aware to feeling dizzy or disoriented. If you’ve ever done psychedelics, you’ve probably felt the shift from your regular baseline into that trance-like, hyper-aware state they can induce. Or think about being totally in the zone while working out, then suddenly feeling more detached or less present. These are all examples of different "states of consciousness." It’s your ability to take in and process everything happening in your current field of awareness and to focus on it. The less of that field you can "take in" - and the less depth with which you can perceive it - the less conscious you are. The more you're able to take in and engage with, the more conscious, “awake,” and alert you feel. Dead → Unconscious → Deep Sleep → Groggy → Semi-Aware → Lightly Awake → Tired → Alert → Focused → Engaged → Aroused → Flow State → Peak Awareness → Transcendental Awareness → Enlightened / Fully Awake / "Alive" / "Real" / "Truthful" / "Radiant"

@Natasha Tori Maru >.<

Precisely because everything feels so "meaningless" - because nothing really seems to "matter" in any ultimate sense - the best thing you can do is just enjoy your time here as much as possible. You're a temporary carbon-based lifeform on a floating rock, and there aren’t many other fields that genuinely help you appreciate the moment and the experience of being alive like spirituality does. The only real caution with spiritual work is getting too deep into it before your material life is in order. Like it or not, we still have to deal with money, health, safety, and all the basics. So I usually suggest people get that stuff sorted first, because no amount of psychedelics, meditation, obscure yoga practices, or breathwork will make your rent magically disappear. But once you’ve got the essentials handled - or at least have a plan and are working on it - adding spirituality and self-development is incredibly powerful. It's one of the few paths that actually aims to deepen your awareness and increase your ability to find beauty in simple things, instead of chasing material wealth, luxury, or the scarcity mindset that dominates modern life. Think about how it feels when someone you love dies. Losing a loved one can feel like a small preview of death itself. In those moments, what do you wish you had done more of? You probably just wish you had spent more time with them, appreciated them more, really understood and loved them deeply. It’s the same with your life and this earth. You’d probably wish you had found more joy, more love, more happiness. That you had opened up more, understood, and expressed yourself more. That you had seen more of the world, more beauty, in whatever way felt true to you. It might sound wishy-washy on the surface, but if you sit with it, you’ll feel the truth of it yourself. And, don’t just take my word for it - actually contemplate it! Death - or even just contemplating it - can offer a powerful clarity about what truly matters. It gives you a glimpse of how you might feel when your own time comes, and that awareness can guide you toward living more fully and not wasting it. The tricky part - and this applies to almost everyone, myself included - is that even when we know all of this on a conceptual level, actually feeling it is a whole different story. Truly stepping into a state of appreciation and gratitude is hard. It's not just a mindset shift, it's a full shift in consciousness. Like Leo said in his recent post on “Change of States". No matter how much I or anyone else tells you, “Be happy,” or “You could die at any moment, be grateful,” it’s still incredibly hard to feel that truth deeply and consistently. That’s exactly why spirituality exists. It’s a field that recognized this problem - that we live in different states and gradients of consciousness - and it began to study it almost like a form of science. It asks: What actually works? What techniques genuinely help people live in a more elevated, present, and appreciative state? Just like studying business, sales, or finance can help you solve money problems, studying spirituality can help you solve existential ones - the numbness, the emptiness, the disconnection from life. It helps you feel more, see more, and appreciate more. That, to me, is deeply meaningful - and absolutely worth the time and effort!

Happiness and Enjoyment of your Life! Spiritual work, psychedelics, meditation retreats - all enhance your ability to appreciate the beauty of your experience more and more. That’s really it! What else could it be? The more you understand reality, the more you can navigate it, absorb it, and use it to enrich your life and your limited time here. Whether you choose to use that understanding to help others, to enjoy yourself, to be playful and happy, or all of the above – that’s entirely up to you! Purifying your mental state, gaining clarity, self-love, and confidence. Honestly, it’s a beautiful path – one of the most humane and fulfilling fields there is!

Happy Birthday!

The Ego thinks it is Love. The Dog thinks it is God!

@Princess Arabia B=B!

Looks and beauty are obviously important, but if someone wants a genuine, long-lasting connection, it’s silly to make them a dealbreaker - unless you're counting on aesthetic medicine advancing drastically in the next 20 years so we can all look like youthful chickens with surgery. There has to be something "deeper" that keeps you both together, even as you wrinkle into dust.

@Leo Gura Do you ever plan on having a long-term partner? What happens as they age? (This isn't an attack/trap question promise, just genuine curiosity - thank you!)

@Carbon Aww, super glad it helped you! This made me smile a lot <3 I wish you the best of luck, and if you ever need help answering the questions or reflecting on them deeper, feel free to write here or DM me for support! Sorry about that. Yeah, self-esteem and confidence are probably the next areas to focus on, to be honest. If you can, investing in some sort of coaching or just putting yourself out there conversationally - or in whatever area you feel "unworthy" - is the best approach. Confidence is just massive experience. The more experience you gain in the areas where you feel insecure, the more competent you'll become, and the more self-esteem you'll rebuild. I'm sure if I asked you about your startup and had you explain it to a newbie, you'd feel plenty of assurance and confidence. To be honest, even outside of relationships, this is probably one of the most invaluable skills you can invest in. Massive opportunities open up for people just by developing more self-belief. You’re clearly a highly skilled and intelligent person - there’s no reason this has to be a lifelong struggle - I have high hopes for you, Carbon :) Good Luck!

Hey, amazing! Congratulations! In terms of money, no one inherently "deserves" it more or less. If you look around, you'll see that a lot of resources don’t necessarily go to the most intelligent, kind, or conscious people, but rather to those who have the resources, network, grit, and perseverance to chase it. While this isn’t always the case, many people acquire wealth this way. From your perspective, you didn’t scheme, cheat, or scam - you provided something of value to society. That money is 100% deserved. In fact, there’s no one better to have it because now you’re in the best position to use it however you want and truly reflect on what will make you most fulfilled and happiest. Don’t fall into the trap of thinking, "Money won’t make things better" - of course, it will. With money, you have SO many more options: the ability to create the changes you want to see in the world, help your loved ones, push human development and research, go to therapy, and heal the parts of yourself that struggle with self-love and relationships, etc. I think this is the perfect time to reflect and ask yourself: What do you really want out of life? How much money do you need to achieve it? Looking back, what made you the happiest? What change do you wish to see in the world? What business, product, content, or creation do you want to bring into existence? What makes you enjoy your days and love your life? What inspires you? What would you need to buy or acquire to create your ideal environment? What kind of space or setting makes you feel the most inspired and at peace? What does your perfect day look like from morning to night? Who are the people you are actively engaging with daily? Who do you have around you that brings you joy, growth, and fulfillment? If you don't, where would you need to be to find such people? What kind of conversations do you want to be having regularly? What activities or work make you lose track of time? What hobbies or passions do you want to explore more deeply? How do you want to feel every day when you wake up? What kind of physical and mental routines would make you feel your best? Where do you want to spend most of your time - city, nature, by the water, in a cozy home? How much structure vs. spontaneity do you want in your days? What habits or distractions do you want to remove from your life? What experiences or adventures do you want to prioritize in your life? What is missing right now that, if added, would bring you more happiness and fulfillment? Money is an amazing tool because it gives you the freedom to pursue so much more. Not having to stress about bills or financial struggles is huge. Many people live their whole lives and die before ever having the opportunity to truly think about what they want to do in this world. Don’t feel anxious - this is an incredible moment! Your life will only get better from here. Also, what happened with your relationship, if I may ask? Is there a chance for reconciliation? If you have more time now to invest in relationships and less work stress, you could have a meaningful conversation with her about why things ended and show a real commitment to fixing things. If she was a good partner and you’re serious about making it work, I see a lot of potential there. That said, even if this relationship doesn’t work out, dating with financial stability is so much better than dating without it. In any case, it will help you find and filter out the right people - those you truly resonate with and want to spend your time with. Good luck, and once again - congratulations on your financial freedom!

Hugs to you! Best of Luck, @Daniel Balan <3 I believe in you. 💓💗💛💚💙💜

@Yimpa Oneness-One-Line-| 1 Singular Point . Back to Start, Source 10................................. .