BornToBoil

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Everything posted by BornToBoil

  1. @Leo Gura how do you deeply satisfy a desire?
  2. @Leo Gura @Leo Gura but do you have to please your desires all the time? Don't people grow by learning to transcend them? What about your video on the root cause of all addictions and you loosing a lot of weight by sitting and feeling the urge to eat icecream, but not acting on it?
  3. @LastThursday great advice, thank you
  4. I want to have someone I could be truly close with: Trust Support Acceptance Understanding Truly being yourselves with each other Helping each other out in challenging situations Not being bound by time and space It feels impossible to find the right person and build a relationship like that. Where do you even start?
  5. @Dancer I see. Ok, thanks )
  6. @WonderSeeker Thanks!
  7. @mandyjw you are right )
  8. @WonderSeeker I am actually not that sure about all that "numbers game" mentality anymore. Both in dating and friendships. I know a lot of people who found their soulmate after like 2-3 relationships. And I met my childhood bestfriend by pure chance. I think there are more forces in play than just numbers. Maybe it's destiny, who knows )
  9. @Dancer I like that concept and I don't see how it's bad. I actually had a bestfriend when I was a kid. But, unfortunately, the process of growing up made us go separate ways... I never had anyone I would be that close with ever since. @WonderSeeker I don't want to have a ton of friends. It's too exausting. I just need one friend, one girlfriend and, maybe, one dog ))
  10. @Etherial Cat thank you @Ensho also, music really helps me in the meantime
  11. @Ensho yeah, it really sucks. I constantly beat myself up for wasting the most important time of my life. I still hope that it will somehow change with time and I won't have to live like that for life.
  12. @Etherial Cat Yes, I guess I am ok. Just sad and kind of hopeless, lol. The thing is that it feels like I am going in circles. I try to change, improve myself, but it's all futile, I am not getting anywhere. I try to set goals, create a vision for my life etc., only to have a backlash after a week or two, give up, throw it all away and ultimately achieve or change nothing. And it has been like that for as long as I can remember.
  13. Thank you all, guys
  14. @Preety_India thank you. You are kind. Talking to you really helped me ) Can I ask why do you have 3 personalities in the description? Do you identify as all three of them? Also why do you have a wind map there?
  15. @Preety_India I know that you are right, but still, it just feels wrong to me to accept myself as I am now. I don't want to be that person anymore, I want to be someone that I actually admire. But it feels impossible to change.
  16. @Preety_India you just don't know me, I am really quite pathetic
  17. @mandyjw if what you are saying is true then why not just try again with a new life? Maybe I willl get lucky being born into a better person.
  18. @Preety_India but aren't people constantly deciding outcomes of their life with their every action? Also, what if I just stopped eating and drinking water and died? Would it still be a suicide?
  19. Everyone says that, but in the end most people just get sad for a while and then move on.
  20. @Preety_India sorry, but I don't understand it. If she is dead, then wouldn't you be joining her after killing yourself? Also why should dead people (assuming that they have consciousness at all) care about what happens in the material world? Isn't all self-actualization work about realizing that there is no self?
  21. @Preety_India isn't you believing that life is sacred is the same as christians believing that you will go to hell if you kill yourself? It's still a belief just a positive one. What if a person doesn't have a mother? Shouldn't God be beyond feeling pain for some dead human?
  22. What this journal is about: I want to quit watching porn and masturbating for an indefinite period of time (maybe forever if I like it, lol). So I came up with this idea to start a journal to record everything that I deem interesting and useful throughout my journey like changes in my energy levels, emotional challanges that I have to overcome, various insights, etc., and also to keep myself motivated. I want to see if I will really experience any positive change from doing this and how big it will be. However, I will try to be as openminded as possible and try my best to not turn this into an ideology as I feel many "nofappers" do. About me: I am 20 year old. I don't have a gf. I have never had sex before and don't plan on having it any time soon, so I will be basically doing a complete abstinence for a while (probably at least for the next 6 months). I believe that I have a porn addiction, I have been watching porn since I was like 10 years old (I use the term "porn" here very generally), starting with some erotic fanfiction and gradually regressing towards more and more hardcore porn. I have tried to do this before but was unsuccessful (relatively). However, I believe that this time is going to be different since my determination is much stronger now. I expect this to be really hard but also really fun and rewarding Everyones comments are welcome as long as they are polite and respect opinions of other people. Lets go!
  23. My younger sister (19) is currently in a relationship with a guy who is 37. I am trying to be open minded and all but I am still a bit concerned about this, especially since I am the only one who knows about their relationship because she doesn't what to tell anyone else from our family (it would be a suicide if she did, lol). As far as a guy is concerned he seems to be nice. He is an english teacher and they share lots of common interests like meditation, yoga, chakras and stuff. I haven't met him in person, but I saw his pictures and he doesn't look like a sociopath serial killer, lol. The only shady thing that I've noticed is that they met on tinder and he lied about his age in his profile and didn't confess for like a month. His excuse was that he was afraid that my sister would leave him and he didn't want that to happen since he liked her so much. P.S. it's not like my opinion would change anything because I trust my sister with the responsibility to handle her relationships herself anyway.
  24. @ajai thanks
  25. Well, I actually relapsed once more after the last massage and then went to sleep. I also had to overcome strong resistance to post it because it just felt too embarassing... But whatever, I want to be honest and firt of all honest with myself. If I decided to hide that facr, what would it mean about me and about my chances of success on this journey? I am going to start from zero today and do my absolute best to succeed this time.