The observer

all knowledge is illusory cause and effect are illusory whaaaaaat! mind is fear = limited love = life = form truth is unlimited love = no fear = death = formlessness drop the thoughts b cuz theyre fear embrace love and have no fear or dont hahaha

day #1 offline voluntarily word count: 40-50 words offline involuntarily word count: about 100-120 words for little chats with random acquaintances online word count (my journals dismissed): i wanted to comment on several topics on different platforms but i resisted so in total: 4 words on some topic here but deleted after 15 mins as i recalled the challenge + 10 words one comment on fb + one blue heart emoji on zeroISinfinity journal to show my love and gratitude its craaaazy how much time we waste with useless conversations every day off to sleep now

silence is truly revealing! tons of huge insights are coming in. theres no such thing as delusion. wait what? YES! unless u think of it it doesnt exist u have to imagine the concept "delusion" for it to be true and either way with or without that concept its all truth and its all love. only u can create delusion just as much as u create ur suffering. no one else is deluded only u can delude urself hahahaha

thank u ?

followed this link https://qst.darkfactor.org/ from another journal on here and heres my result idk wht to make of it idk what any of these things mean but it seems like im evil hahaha ok i love my self i wanna increase my narc ?

haha fuck my life i realized that i dont love my self wtf! hahaha zero was right its not about others its about me b cuz its all love and perfection some ppl will love u for no reason and some ppl will hate u for no reason theres no logic in love and attraction im imagining others and whether they love or hate me its just imagination its just thoughts its just desire for more its just ego haha how silly! what a cosmic joke!

what i find interesting is the many ppl who tried through out history to solve the problems of poverty and hierarchical structures of society and what amuses me is that no one of them so far succeeded in that mission despite dying hard for it. here i will present a view for why its not possible to end this mess. warning this insight is derived from watching porn haha. so i was enjoying watching two ppl having sex on my screen and it hit me wht the hell is going on here? y r these ppl doing wht their doing? and then suddenly the dots connected them selves and it became clear to me how every thing work all animals strive to survive naturally but humans in particular have created many sophisticated systems for how survival and well being are supposed to be achieved. porn industry is one of those systems and so is every other business career religion institution etc.. so every human being is under the illusion of his particular system and is striving to climb up to the top of his system b cuz that is the narrative that he gets fed with from birth and as long as hes staying where he is or moving up wards it feels good and it feeds back positively in to his motivation to climb up and demand more while people who are moving down wards feel bad about their selves and that feeds back in to their motivation so they go down even more and the hierarchy is all about competition and deception so the more competitive and deceptive u are the higher ur chances will get. any way so ppl start from some where but they dont have enough power until they are at the top. all right so ur at the top enjoying all the pros spending money enjoying sex etc.. u will want to maintain that structure b cuz it serves ur ego haha and even if ur the most enlightenment master u will still not give up ur powers b cuz power corrupted u b cuz corruption is inevitable. and even if u want to be brave and noble the rest of the hierarchy some times even the poor will resist and fight u so u will end up murdering them or them murdering u. and all of that is only the beginning now lets move on to y the illusion that moves ppl exists to begin with or in other words y ppl submit to the hierarchy in the first place. and here i think there r two components desire and programming. programming is basically the ideas u have and all the things u believe in and how u view ur self and the world around u. desire is a lack of fulfilment and once it is fulfilled the only thing that remains is the programming. one question that comes to mind is that can desire ever be completely fulfilled? i would say no. there can only be windows of fulfilment here and there and then a sense of lack will grow back again. but it can be diminished to the lowest levels ie necessary physiological desires for survival and security. now imagine that u and every other human being can have all ur desires fulfilled constantly and without lag u will still have the old programming and patterns that u cant get rid of immediately and unless uve done tons of work for decades it is not likely that u will be able to let go of ur patterns addictions etc.. so ur patterns will fight for maintaining the hierarchy. ppl low on the hierarchy will still enjoy moving up and ppl high will still enjoy putting others down so it wont make sense y to even try to get rid of the hierarchy b cuz it serves a certain psychological function that has to be worked through also imagine a world where no one has to do any thing but survive him self and only him self. assume that every one is peaceful and will leave u survive for ur self this will mean the end of life as u know it. no more hollywood no more money no more status no more porn no more government no more any thing. u will have to hunt or grow ur own food and build ur own house u will have to design ur own car etc u see where this is going. human beings will have to reduce their selves to animals to achieve the utopian society. other wise it will remain just an ideal dream. conclusion its literally impossible to end poverty and transcend hierarchical structures so its more practical to do wht u can do to better ur life and be grateful for all the illusions of life

for the third time in a week i wake up crying feeling intense love. it came in two different variations ive only felt these two kind of love 10 to 15 years ago i felt the latter towards one person for more than two consecutive years but now i have no feelings for that person what so ever. its not the kind of spiritual infinite love thing but it is divine and it is love and it is intense like a heavy black hole inside the chest which feels both good and bad at the same time. i couldnt identify it perfectly yet but it has a component of attachment which gives the feeling of being imprisoned for eternity yet this imprisonment is hauntingly beautiful b cuz its where u wanna be its like being drunk and in love. the former kind of love has a component of vulnerability its like being completely powerless and in love. if it was up to me i would choose the latter i would choose attachment over powerlessness even though theyre essentially the same thing but the difference is that attachment empowers u within the relationship and gets u back to normal without it so its an all or nothing situation while the other kind weakens u within the relationship and does not empower u without it but u only feel relief from recovering.

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it really is not a problem on my part i give love to every one but i either receive hate or no other reaction. right now i have over 100 posts here im sure at least 15-20 of them are a reply to a question with advice of my own experience. not a single reply got any positive feedback. i guess im looking for attention cuz thats what might fill the gap inside me but at least im looking for appreciation of my help which no one does. no body really cares about u every human is a devil caring only about him self. i hate all human beings if i were god i would throw them all in hell and thatd still be mercy of me b cuz they deserve more. theres no worse species than the human race they only want to take the good and give the bad they never give any thing good for free they always want some thing in return and if u ever make a mistake or tumble they will immediately without a second thought prey on u. theyre heartless zombies that suck u out and leave u broken and empty

just earlier today they announced 1290 new covid-19 deaths in china. i dont trust whats going on in there the chinese govt is probably manipulating the numbers and there probably are more cases and deaths than announced. its not unusual for china to hide info id stay cautious cuz its not over yet

@Intraplanetary procrastination trap! clearly ur mind is tricking u to avoid doing the work. u shouldnt be thinking let alone asking questions about what u should do its obvious that u should just suck it up and get ur assignments done. i mean for gods sake its just 3 months and u will be done with university forever. watch some motivational videos exercise for some time each day do cold showers breathe deeper and slower every time u feel resistance and just do what u gotta do. doing the lp course is irrelevant to this not to say its not for u just sayin the timing is bad. keep in mind that if u dont make use of these 3 months ur gonna need another year so ur just gonna be wasting time if u avoid the work. try to not think about it just do it cuz it always sounds a lot worse in ur head than in reality

im trying my best thanks id rather not say

yet another proof that ppl are evil what did i do to deserve such accusations? i was just having a honest conversation with leo yet a blind worshipper jumps in defending leo from nothing and projects his complexities and lack of authority on to me. ive found his comment offensive so i reported it and now i hate him but i didnt reply to him b cuz i know it for a fact he will attack me again i need love why do i receive hate?

@davidluginbuehl the ideal is to do nothing at all but eat and drink by the least amounts possible but thats an extremely difficult feat so dont be hard on urself. aim for the most and allow a little bit of back sliding leave a room for error dont try to perfect the retreat as thats another trap and one last really important thing is to let go of all expectations go on the retreat without any preconceived thoughts about how much value ur supposed to be extracting and in fact counter intuitively do the opposite go on the retreat with the intention of losing instead of gaining keep in mind that u can only fill ur cup only once its empty get ready to waste ten days of ur life for nothing and believe that its totally worth it im doing a silence challenge starting from tomorrow its basically like a mini at home retreat only difference is that its without emptying my cup but rather filling it with information im full of wisdom right now but lacking in information so thats what im doing seeking information but for u seeking wisdom is counter productive as i explained above u should be aiming at emptying ur cup and let wisdom come in naturally good luck

reading the book "Destined for War : Can America and China Escape Thucydides's Trap?" for Graham Allison and its a very interesting and enlightening read so far right about now i created another journal with the intention of making use of the quarantine. silence has always been a good friend and a great teacher

@Pouya think of it this way the collective is at purple and then suddenly some individuals realise the limitations of purple and become red. what do u expect to happen? of course since the red individuals have relatively higher consciousness than their peers they take their rightful place and lead the less conscious towards higher consciousness (red in this case) and then after the society starts growing into red and becoming a barbaric society then blue starts emerging as higher conscious individuals that have gone beyond the limitations of red so they become leaders and impose morality on their red people and so on the spiral goes on forever after some hundreds of years even yellow will be viewed as cult like too. dont forget that when blue and purple first emerged they were viewed as something very cutting edge so every thing cutting edge will be appreciated in comparison to the old limiting system of course after years of resistance and fighting against it

causality is an illusion there is no key to success its all a matter of luck even if u try to be smart and come up with a list of things that can be done to get u closer to success or money ur still bullshitting urself some ppl are born rich and theres no changing that and some ppl are born poor and theres no changing that and theres rich and poor ppl and ppl in between that change with time but that does not mean any thing irl of course thats not to say u should stop working u can do what ever u want and still be poor or u can do what ever u want and become rich but the bottom line is that its not up to u not 1% nor 99% its 100% out of ur control or choice

u cant lose what u never had u are illusory progress is illusory levels of consciousness are illusory and all is a zero sum game for infinite love

haha yes i think its time for a lock

it is a zero sum game but from the limited and identified human pov it does not seem so. try expanding ur perspective. it is definitely a zero sum game from the ultimate perspective. every thing is changing all the time yet its all still the same b cuz its one. form is ever changing yet formlessness is always the same and it cant be otherwise. if u think life is not a zero sum game then u havent truly awakened to oneness and ur still operating from ego

again ur repeating urself. im talking about being and ur talking about becoming. were not in disagreement leo but ur failing to see my point probably b cuz ur so much identified with ur imagination. u can always choose to let it go.

leo i told u that ur using duality by creating points of reference and u denied but then u do that again right now. if we think of consciousness as a light its still always one light but to say its more brighter or less brighter we have to create points of reference which is what we call the dualistic mind b cuz the notion of time is by definition dualistic.

ok but whos imagining the levels but consciousness? its one consciousness imagining zero to infinite levels

this is only true when in duality by creating points of reference for the higher levels. levels only exist in gods imagination