The Paradox Of Developing Self-Trust

By Leo Gura - August 22, 2016 | 25 Comments

What the process of developing self-trust looks like.

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Adrian G says:

“Are you the identity you’ve constructed?” This was the most interesting part of the video for me. Really good stuff. And the “if so then…” Really gives me a stronger launchpad to question a lot of things. Very helpful. Thanks Leo

strwbrycough says:

thank-you for taking the time to convey these insights leo. During the earlier time in your path how did you balance it all? its an internal battle you know you want to follow this path and you know where success and achievement leads but fundamentally to continue to do both is like half-assing your inner guidance. Im sure you faced many of these challenges, what helped you along the way. Ive seen all your videos, taken the life purpose course have been strategically taking action, taken notes but its always a battle to stay true to the path and what we are doing here when your tied down to things like a job and surrounded by bad examples. how did you stay true when you know you cant trust your self and your caught in the playground of the ego.

Leo Gura says:

I trust my intuition.

And I’ve spent years questioning the very metaphysical nature of reality, so all the human stuff to me is quite silly and easy to see through. It’s all stories and personal biases, none of which is ultimately true.

I can see my own biases as my ego constructs them, and I don’t take them too seriously.

aymane says:

Leo i’ve been watching your videos for little while but this is the first time i’m really taking action and not just understanding intelectually your teachings.these two days i’ve been doubting a lot of stuff from the list you gave and i find that it makes me isolated and lonely because i need to be alone for a long time to concentrate and do it.i don’t have a problem being alone i can handle that but i’m thinking can it be bad for me somehow ? should i keep doing it anyway ?

i thank you Leo from all my heart for your help

Leo Gura says:

Of course, solitude is key to growth. You should be spending 1000s of hours in solitude if you’re serious about this work. That is not a problem, as long as you’re not losing your mind in fantasies and dogmas.

Jon Henry says:

As usual this video arrived in my inbox just when I needed it to… In this video you have answered a lot of questions that have been on my mind recently. This is not the first time this has happened so I guess you’re very in touch with what your viewers need. Thank you once again for taking the time to make this video and share it. Wishing you well Leo

Dee Dee says:

Leo your message is timely for the evolution of young people I am a 60 year old woman who belived I was on the spiritual path I made decision using mind and ego not even asking what my muse wanted ! Sadly I destroyrd my life by the loss of trust seeking others to find trust with in absolutely a neurosis !!!!!
Painful such mistakes talk time away from life and many broken pieces to pick up materially and emotionally ! I had tears I did not trust , never go to a phy looking to trust someone else ! Pain I would say to you who are young thr coast of truth and not to trust oneself is something you don’t want to face at 60!
And the years go quickly … Time is precious and the years you give to learning to trust yourself must be vigilant absolutely ! A law a principle to live life ! If I could turn the clock back and used my heart ! And trusted myself and other I trusted rather than the ego and giving away my trust to people I did not trust !
To really open the heart !
Please go foward life is short nubbie shift your truth trust yourself !

Thanks Leo
I have been listening to many of your videos and found them inspiring
I have been doing this work since 1986 and just recently am beginning to trust myself.

Leo Gura says:

Better late than never

Maura says:

Leo, you are so unique. I learn so much from you. Thanks for your videos.

Gene says:

Next video speak with a British accent.
That American accent is a cultural preference
Great video!!!

Rachel says:

I don’t seem to have too much trouble doubting things in my life. I have been singing and writing my whole life and it is what I live for and you had me doubting that until you thankfully told me it was okay to trust my muse. I think it is the only thing I do trust in my life. I have been doing this kind of self actualization work for years and I definitely went through the stage where I realized I really had no clue about anything. But that came years ago and it never left and here I am still with incredibly low self esteem. Any kind of rejection can send me into a deep depression and I know it is all self inflicted. I feel hatred, disgust and disappointment in myself. It affects others around me although it is usually from me retreating so far into a shell that I can’t even speak, unfortunately they often don’t understand that it is just me I am angry with. I can see it happening but I have a very difficult time stopping it.

I was a scared, shy child who was afraid to question authority or ask questions and I remember the world being a big scary place to me. I was also molested as a child and I don’t really remember a time in my childhood when I was fully comfortable in my skin except when I was on a stage. I retreat to that scared child state often. When I do I don’t know what to do except turn off my phone, sit alone in a room, think, cry, try to write songs, and shut everyone out. Do you think that’s okay? It renders me unable do anything else and I get more depressed because I feel unproductive and it becomes a huge downward spiral until I can finally pull myself out. I am having a down day today knowing that tomorrow or later today I could feel completely fine and happy with my life. But I still go way up and way down and it is a little freaky for people around me, I know this. I would like to have less down days, but is this just the process?

Sunny Omer Hassan says:

Nicely done Leo! Your video helped make clear more ego characterizations and manifestations. The examples give a good sense of how to be mindful of these. Thanks

Monika says:

Hi Leo, i love that now in your videos you clearly distinguish between newbies and higher levels of self development. i think this was a great help for us learners to recognise our egos and it shows that you really working on your blog development.

Eugene says:

Hi Leo
You are very articulate you have The Understanding. Once again you have a good movie And a good topic.

Luke Powers says:

thank you for posting these videos. i found out the hard way that disscussion of self growth with others is often counter productive . socialized pressures had me thinking i was the crazy one for making good decisions for myself your videos have been so helpfull

Clara says:


I couldn’t get through your video because your advice on doubting your beliefs and emotions to achieve higher consciousness seems redundant. Isn’t doubt another tool created by the mind? Doubt, beliefs, interpretations of emotions, that’s all mind.

Aren’t you just creating another mental method to get rid of mental garbage, its like a catch 22. I get exhausted of trying to refine the way I think.


Leo Gura says:

There’s nothing wrong with using the mind. More people need to use their minds properly.

Notice your comment itself is a tool of the mind. And look where it got you: stuck!

Instead of doubting properly, you trusted your silly mind gullibly and unconsciously.

Clara says:

Oh. I see now that you pointed that out. Haha thanks for that. I don’t feel stuck anymore.

Anne says:

I watch your videos and get these really big, dumb, stupid smiles on my face. Point after point.. Man, I wish I came across your videos 3 years ago during my journey. Everything you say was my exact experience toward self mastery. Things that I uncovered through trial and error the hard way. It was rough. But now I sit here and smile.. yep. yep. yep. yep. Everything. Every fucking video. It has solidified me into a solid rock. I had the tiniest hint of doubt just because I had no one to compare this incredible experience to and I never found anyone who could relate. You validated the shit of me. Thank you for that. You are doing an amazing thing here. It’s seriously well done, and you can’t really say that until you know how many mind fucks you have to go thru to get to the other side of each and every one of these egoic illusions, let alone communicate it. Awesome, Leo. Awesome.

31 March 2021
Been to Auriol Park with my autistic class won’t say which time today though

For anonymity

A teenage girl with blonde hair glared at an autistic teenage girl

She regrets not saying Jealous of cool kids or friends

She said “or envy” instead of answering “jealous of what?”

She regrets avoiding the question

She is more scared of disappointing cool kids than the coronavirus

Karen said

Emotional pain is more abstract

than physical pain

whereas with a virus you can look at it with a microscope!

This Autistic teenage girl

Would rather die from the coronavirus with no underlying symptoms this year


Be rejected by all the people who are more smart than her

These cool kids are more smart than her

She tries to stay loyal to them

because one of them

was there for her

when she was at her worst

in October 2020

She was just sitting there

because she is always afraid

of annoying

the cool kids

She would rather die from coronavirus

than rejection from cool kids any day

She can’t get over rejection

she will always be haunted by rejection

To young cool kids

I’m sorry for annoying you unintentionally before you told me to leave you alone

No matter how you feel about yourselves I always want to help you whenever I

possibly can.

You may not like me and I can’t blame you even If I want to which I never do

I hope you will be as successful as possible eventually

Don’t worry I’LL never use your real names I respect your anonymity every day!

I hope you are never offended if I leave you alone just to be outside in breaks

yours sincerely

Autistic teenage girl

Max Raoy Gron says:

Self-trust can be an evil/negative thing, I trusted myself to have any cake and eat it but then the distress was having to pick one option, that is I’m either a religious believer, non-religious or secular, or anti-religious, I can’t be both, and as for religious atheism, it doesn’t work, what it causes is the downfall betwixt anyone else who thinks religion should be anti-atheist. But that’s saying a lot of my original atheistic state, it’s a matter of being a man, being real, and choosing a belief or disbelief and sticking to it, I don’t choose one because it “feels right”, my beliefs most likely very much feel wrong, mainly to other people. I’m trying to pick a true belief or a true disbelief, true kingship, without indignities or ignobilities to any king, prince, earl, or nobleman. In any case it’s all good and I will never retract to, for, or from an uptight or ignoble, or base or angry man, and I’ll never give in to it or do any of the weird things he or anyone weird wants me to do, I’m not giving in!

Max Gron says:

Given that people do stupid things and trust that, i.e. anti-intellectualism, as with most religions, scared of smart people and smartness freaks people out, people giving other people a hard time, calling them stupid, yet with self-trust idiots take that on board and trust themselves to go on the bus acting that way without considering themselves idiots, and other, weird people, putting school in the picture at a party, fuck off! The weirdness is fine but I’d bloody well leave school out of it, and people coming to meet stupid people or workers for disability, fuck off! I should mix with my type, not these stupid, spastic people! Stupidity looks like that and there’s no crazy medicine in the world that will make them better!

Max Gron says:

I don’t wanna be mean, but I was told by (I won’t say her name) a staff member that the doubting of everything is to throw you into vulnerability, and what I tell you is that you’re going to believe superstition if you doubt, asking if something’s good or bad or what you should do, whether it’s true, will make you fucking sick, I’m not trusting a scientist’s or spiritual person’s doubt again, doubt can make you suspicious, and it can make you believe what someone says without you holding beliefs, it’s fucking dangerous, and I’m only going to doubt in my science and believe the things I believe, this is making me deny everything that’s an attack on my identity, beliefs, and sciences, the truth is I only follow lepidopterology and no other science, I’m not sceptical of this or my beliefs, or my religion, and I’m not sceptical of Leo Gura, I’m sceptical of what I find in my research in butterflies and moths, the results, and I use a scepticism of proving the results wrong, by proving myself wrong, I prove the end result right, it’s extreme enough when I was doubting everything else only to believe very few things, I’m not throwing any more doubt than it is.

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